"Daryl I can walk. It's okay." Beth said as they got closer to the trees. She didn't want or need to be carried.
Daryl reluctantly put her down. She stepped away from him putting space between them, but she gazed up at him. Their eyes met and it wasn't his Beth that he saw. There was a darkness in her eyes. He couldn't tell if it was pain or fear, but it was darkness where there always used to be light.
"Beth.." he said quietly.
But she shook her head and turned away just as Carol walked up.
"Beth?" Oh my god! You're alive? How…" Carol had tears in her eyes as she hugged Beth.
"Yeah I'm alive. Pretty sure God had nothing to do with it though." Beth said. The small smile on her face didn't reach her eyes.
Daryl heard the cynicism in her voice. He disregarded it for now. He reached out and put his hand on her arm. Beth glanced down at his hand. His touch unnerved her even though it was all she had thought about since she'd last seen his face in the hallway of the hospital.
"She got cut. We need the first aid kit." Daryl said. They followed Carol to the camouflaged moving van. Once they were inside the back of the truck Beth shrugged off her jacket, wincing from the pain. It fell on the floor of the truck and Daryl stared at the blood that stained it.
Carol examined the stab wound. "It's not a clean cut. I'm just gonna butterfly it for now. Denise will probably want to stitch up when we get back." Carol had Beth lay down on a pallet. Daryl sat down by Beth's head and leaned against the wall of the truck.
"Who's Denise?" Beth asked. She rolled over onto her right side. She wiggled around trying to find the best position to lay. Daryl scooted over so she could rest her head on his leg. Her body tensed at his touch, but she put her head on his leg. One braid slipped down onto his hand and he gently fingered the blonde hair curled at the end of it.
"She's our doctor. In Alexandria." Carol said. She started pulling supplies from the first aid kit.
"You have a doctor?" Beth said so softly only Daryl heard her.
"This is going to sting some Beth. I'm sorry." Carol said.
Beth smelled the antiseptic before she felt it. And then it was just fire. She sucked in her breath through gritted teeth. Daryl slipped his hand into hers and nodded.
"Squeeze it if ya have to." he said. And she did. She bit down hard on her lip and tasted blood. She felt sweat beading on her forehead and neck. She tried not to groan, but it hurt so bad she felt nauseous. Carol laid gauze over the wound and taped it up.
"Okay all done. That should protect it for now," Carol said.
Beth rolled over onto her back, her eyes were closed and a tear slid silently down her cheek. She brushed it away and opened her eyes.
"You okay?" Daryl asked. She nodded and cautiously sat up and leaned back against the truck wall.
"I'm going on to check on Glenn." Carol said. But first she knelt in front of Beth. She was sure the girl would talk about what had happened to her when she was ready, but Carol needed her to know this. "Thank you for saving me, I know you did." Carol put her hand on Beth's cheek. "Whatever got you here, back to us, was a miracle." she smiled over at Daryl, but the smile faded when she took in the expression on his face. "We should head back." she said to him. He knew she meant to Alexandria. They had to take Beth home.
Daryl stopped imagining a reunion after he carried Beth's body out of Grady hospital. He'd gone over and over all of the ways the outcome could have been different, how the kidnapping could have been avoided completely. Then Beth would have still been with him. That was before. This was now. She was here now. She was alive now. And he just wanted to hold her in his arms. That night at the table in the funeral home flashed back in his mind. He'd been so afraid to answer Beth's question about believing there were still good people that all he had done was look at her. And now it was too late.
"Beth I.." He tried again. He was having a hard time getting past anything but her name.
"Daryl why did you put my body in that trunk?" she asked calmly.
Was she purposely trying to push him to his breaking point again? Didn't she realize he felt a huge amount of guilt for all of this? Losing her then finding her and then losing her again.
"I thought you were dead." Saying that was like ripping a scab off a healing wound.
"You could have left me on the ground." she still spoke calmly even though what she was said was insanity.
"I didn't want the walkers gettin' you. Maybe someone would find you, or we'd come back.." He struggled to maintain composure. She had said putting her in the trunk had saved her. What was she trying to do? He had never said anything to anyone else about how he'd felt leaving her body that day. He stood up and walked to the door. "What do you want from me Beth? What am I supposed to say?" he hated the pleading tone in his voice, hated that she had him to the point where he would have done anything to get her to stop pushing him.
Beth felt horrible watching what her words were doing to Daryl. He had saved her by doing what he did. But a very small part of her heart didn't understand how he hadn't felt her, known she was alive. This part of her was a sad little girl who had been left behind inside a terrible nightmare by the one person she had trusted completely. She didn't want to hurt him, didn't really mean to. But this was how she built up her walls. Those walls meant safety, they meant no one could betray her if they couldn't get close.
She put her head down and rested her hands on her thighs.
"Nothin'. I don't want nothin'." she said softly.
Daryl turned on his heel and was gone.
Beth tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. She stood up slowly, using the wall to help her. She couldn't just sit here. His absence screamed at her in the silence.
"Beth?" Glenn came through the door smiling at her like she was a gift. He reached down and picked up the jacket at her feet. She took it and smiled at him tentatively.
"Are we leaving?" she asked in a voice that reminded her too much of a broken girl from the past.
"Yeah. We're gonna go home, well to Alexandria." he said.
"You call it home?" she asked.
"Well that's what it is. For now. It's where everyone is. It's where Maggie is." he stopped talking when she started crying softly.
Maggie. Her big sister, whose arms were safe and Beth could hide in them, from herself and her demons. She brushed her tears away- again.
She nodded. "Let's go see my sister."