Disclaimer: This piece is a sequel to my first story "To fall below adversity" so I suggest if you haven't already, to read that one first. Further warning, this is also going to be angsty and somewhat dark and depressing story at times; like my first one. I don't own CSI or anything relating to them, I'm just borrowing them to satisfy my stupid brain. Any references to real life events; anything I may have read, seen or heard are completely unintentional and coincidental. I gain nothing from this other than to finally get this idea to stop repeating in my head. So please don't sue me or threaten to kill me. If this offends you in any way or it just plain sucks, I apologize that you've wasted several minutes of your life you'll never get back. Just pretend you never saw this, know for future reference to avoid it at all costs should you ever see the title again, and go on with your life. Any and all mistakes are mine. Also, any names, places or references are purely fictional! I have taken liberties to make this interesting and keep it flowing, so not everything is going to be 100% realistic and true to life.

A/N: Once again, thank you so, so much quietmusician for the review! As promised, here is another short chapter…I have the next one pretty much completed as well, so I hope to have that up soon. I'm getting back into the groove and mindset of this story, so I really hope I can finally get this done soon. I've honestly lost interest with the show, so if I didn't already have ideas for this story planned out I probably wouldn't have the motivation to keep going. It was an excellent show and had a pretty good run. Thanks again for sticking with me and please feel free to let me know what you think. Take care everyone!

Dead silence fills the room as all occupants seemingly hold their breath. Sara is completely speechless. Her mind desperately tries to process the implications of the words just spoken. It just can't be true.

Jim shakes his head slightly as if his physical actions will shake away the haunting images he saw that day.

"They think I had got to her quickly though...that she must have taken the pills shortly before I arrived."

He doesn't want to consider what would have happened if he hadn't decided to let himself in to check on her. Catherine had given him a key when Sara was discharged a year ago and he held onto it ever since.

"They were able to pump her stomach right away in the ER and were able to stabilize her. She's alive Sara, but still in the ICU."

Sara allows the words to set in and focuses on the fact that Catherine is alive before she trusts her voice to speak. It still doesn't make sense.

"But, but...I don't get it. Cath would never try to kill herself. She doesn't think that way...hell; I'm the idiot who thinks that way in this relationship, not Cath...She's the strong one."

Her mind instantly flashes back to that dark day when she sat in the living room with a gun to her head, ready to end her life...and Catherine's loving words and strong conviction that they would survive together.

"Sara sweetheart, you're not getting the whole picture...you don't understand...Cath wasn't thinking honey...she wasn't...she was pretty much told she was going to lose you..." Gil begins to explain before he's cut off by an increasingly panic stricken Sara.

"Been there done that in our wonderfully crazy relationship...and she didn't try to off herself then! What are you two not telling me? What the fuck is going on? This can't be happening! I remember being shot...the long painful recovery...the damn car accident...the freaking bullet fragment moving around in my chest...is that not enough? Catherine wouldn't to this to me...to us...not after everything we've gone through. You're lying! You fucking assholes have to be lying! This is not happening!"

Grissom was right; their Sara is back...she has fully woken up this time. The other times she had regained consciousness and they had told her where Catherine was, she would freak out and cry before succumbing to the drug induced haze and sob herself to sleep. This is different though, the famous Sidle fire was back in her eyes. Both men took no offense to the profanity thrown their way. Although they would never admit nor condone it, they were glad to see her angered determination back.

Standing now himself, Grissom points a stern finger at Sara before addressing Jim.

"Sara stop! Jim can you ask a nurse if we can get a wheelchair to take Sara to see Catherine...even if it's just from the window...whatever they will allow. We're only making Sara more upset here...I'll justify ourselves to the Doctors and nurses later."

Although this is the first time Sara has properly woken up since the surgery, she has been medically stable for days. Once they found and treated the cause for her apparent vegetative state, the only medical intervention she required was an IV for hydration. He was confident they would allow her a quick trip in a wheelchair...especially if they knew what a stubborn pain she can be when she is denied something she knows she is capable of doing. It would be more taxing on her health to not let her see that Catherine is alive with her own two eyes. They are in the same hospital after all...a hallway and a short turn to the left is all that actually separates the two women.

Sara sits still in an eerie silence trying to absorb yet another tragedy in her life until an older nurse walks in with a wheelchair with Jim following obediently behind. Seeing the chair seemingly opens the flood gates as she now truly understands that the situation is indeed real and all Sara can manage is a heart wrenching sob. She's still confused as sin, but all she knows for sure is that things are bad...really bad. This is a whole new level of bad that she didn't even think was possible...and this is far from her first tragedy.

Perhaps as a means of protecting itself, Sara's mind wishes and ponders whether this is all part of an elaborate drug induced illusion. Although deep down she knows this isn't true, she can't help but hope she will just wake up and find herself snuggled on the sofa with her two favorite girls watching a movie. She remembers the last time they had a movie night and how she fell asleep half way through Star Wars. If she only knew then that that would be the last time they would all be together as a family...she would have spent the time memorizing their every feature...holding them a little tighter...enjoying every second.

If only...

Glancing between the wheelchair and Sara's frozen, still confused expression welling up with tears; Grissom can feel his stomach drop down to his toes. Unsure what he should actually be doing, he himself appears frozen in time and his voice rendered useless thanks to the growing lump that now occupies his throat.

Taking over the situation for his two lost friends, Jim places a gentle hand on Gil's shoulder before helping the nurse prepare to get Sara in the chair.

The short trip down the hall is uneventful as the nurse awkwardly tries to break the tension surrounding the devastated group by explaining what they are going to see and how the situation is actually much better than it may appear. Although Catherine is hooked up to a ventilator, they are fully confident she will recover with no physical limitations. The doctors had decided to heavily sedate her to allow her body to heal as she had been beyond worn down and stressed prior to the suicide attempt and therefore to protect her airway they intubated her. As soon as the drugs are weaned from her system, she will be breathing on her own again.

Finally able to see Catherine and feel her with own hands, the full weight of the situation weighs heavy on Sara's soul. Her concept of time is still shot and she struggles to comprehend how eleven days have passed since her surgery without her knowledge. All she had wanted to do was help Catherine recover from her broken leg and shower her with love and attention...how had it all gone wrong...again...

All occupants of the room are silent; lost in their own world of pain and regret. Could all of this been prevented? It seems a lifetime ago when their biggest worry was whose turn it was to buy coffee or the tedious day in day out strain of shift work. What they once considered mundane or worrisome now seems like paradise.

Sara finds solace only in the fact that Catherine looks peaceful...that she doesn't appear to be in any distress or pain. She tries desperately to envision Catherine and Lindsay in happier times; before they knew that Todd Dorball even existed. Before kidnapping, murder, loss of trust, accidents or suicide were even on their radar. Before life as she knew it ended and her once seemly perfect existence that had taken years to establish, was ripped away in an instant without a moment's notice.

Lost in memories, Sara can't help but question what she had done to deserve such pain...how this could have happened to her and the ones she held dear. It is a feeling of absolute panic...a paralyzing fear. Gently rubbing her fingers over Catherine's knuckles she finds herself dumbstruck realizing that once again her life will never be the same; there is no going back...there is only pain.