A/N I apologize in advance for any inconsistencies! I did read and re-read but its been a long day! This chapter is long! And I had to end it the way I did for that reason! I hope you enjoy! I did.. I just love Daryl.. ;) Thank you for all the love!
Plans have ultimately changed. And everything is happening so fast. Beth sits alone on the couch her arms wrapped around her body. Rick called another meeting and they are waiting for everyone to arrive at his house. For now it's just the core group, just the people who need to know. It's best, safest, for most of the community to believe they are going along with Negan. People are talking, moving around the room, asking Rick questions, but Beth is focused on one person in particular. He's been pacing around the periphery of the room since they came back here with Jesus and Dwight. He's angry and he hasn't looked at her full on since she told him that maybe this could work and she could help. Daryl's silence in no way means that he has accepted this or that he will even agree to it. She's well aware of the fact that he's hurting too, because he told her, made it perfectly clear that he would sacrifice everything else to keep her safe. Making herself a target is making a mockery of everything that matters to him. She folds her hands in her lap and lowers her head, blinking fast to stop the tears. She doesn't want to cry right here surrounded by everyone. They have already figured out that something is up with Daryl and they're steering clear of him. Which is stupid. She can't just sit here and she's not afraid of him. Before she's able to make her way over to Daryl, Maggie sits down beside her.
"Hey Beth.." Her sister sounds weary and her face looks a little pale. Beth reaches out and lays a hand on her arm.
"Hey Mags.. can you hang on just a sec, I need too…" Her eyes rest on Daryl and her sister picks up on this and nods.
Beth stands and watches him. He's at the window, still for the moment, looking out at something she can't see. She approaches him slowly, but he's got that hunter's innate sense of, well everything and even before she's beside him he glances back at her. His eyes are like two storm clouds, the usual blue is grey and his gaze makes her want to shiver, but she keeps herself in check and doesn't stop walking towards him.
"Daryl, I know you're upset.. I just.." She starts out slow, but apparently he's not willing to listen without interrupting.
"Ya know huh? What else ya know Beth?" He can't fool her with the way he practically growls at her. She knows what's behind it all. And she knows she's the cause.
"I know you think this is a bad idea.." She starts but is silenced by his harsh laugh.
"Ain't a bad idea, prolly a really fuckin' good one." Now his arms are crossed over his chest and he's standing tall. He can be damn right menacing when he's being defensive. If you don't know him. But she does, very well.
"Well then let's at least think about.." Once again he interrupts.
"If it wasn' you.. Don't ya get it girl?" He's no longer growling. He's just lost, he's forgotten he's surrounded by so many of the others or he wouldn't drop his guard, wouldn't plead with her. "I'd do anythin'.. I can't.. I told you, everything else can burn, but you, I won' let you." His hands are by his sides now, he's hiding behind the hair covering his face and he looks so defeated. She can't have him feeling like that.
"You won't Daryl, cause you'll be there too. You'll be right there and you won't let anything happen to me." She's there at his side, hand resting on his hip.
"I lost ya. Before." He's turned his head just a fraction and his eyes are on her, not her eyes, but he is looking at her.
"Won't happen again. You can be there. Holding on to me the whole time." She reaches for his shoulder and holding on she pushes herself up on her toes and her lips brush his ear. Whispers so only he can hear, "If it goes bad we can run. We can always run."
The room around them is suddenly alive and very loud. Maggie is the loudest.
"What's going on? What do you mean he won't let anything happen? Beth?" The rest of the faces in the room wear the same expression that Maggie's does and Beth looks to Rick. Because there is absolutely no way she's gonna be able to explain this to her sister.
"There's one way, well it's just an idea that was recently brought to our attention, I wouldn't even consider it, but.." Rick is stalling. Beth knows he doesn't like the idea either, but she also knows that he is thinking about it, thinking hard.
"Well what is it?" Maggie asks loudly finding her way to Beth's side.
"Negan wants Beth. We want Negan. Beth could be the bait that brings him right where we need him to be."
To say that what Rick said didn't go over well, is an understatement. Suddenly everyone has an opinion about it.
"This isn't the plan we're set on." Rick is trying to talk over Maggie and Glenn and even Michonne, all of whom are very vocal about what they think of this idea and everyone seems to have forgotten that she gets a say. She of all of them should be able to have a part in making this decision.
"Yet." She folds her arms across her chest and she hears the growl behind her but ignores it, choosing instead to glare at the others.
"Beth. Don't. This is heated enough!" She sees the desperation in Rick's eyes and softens. She doesn't want to make this any harder than it already is. But it just seems so simple. Just this one little thing and they can end it all.
"Have you even worked through the details of how this would go down or any other scenario that might possibly work? We know what he's capable of. We saw that firsthand." Aaron, always the voice of reason steps forward. His eyes on Rick initially, but they find their way to Daryl. Daryl's head is down and he's pacing again, not looking at anyone. Beth's heart hurts seeing him like this, knowing it's her that's partially to blame.
"That's what we're here to do.." Rick begins. He's interrupted by Daryl. He came back into the conversation, eyes blazing.
"Beth's got it all figured out, doncha Beth?" Okay so now the anger is back. And he's across the room and in her space, she holds her ground though.
"We all have to make sacrifices to keep our family safe." She feels like that's all this is. Kinda. Doesn't she? Daryl is just shaking his head.
"And wha' ya gonna do when pulls out that bat girl? That gonna be sacrafice enough? Ya already had a fuckin' bullet in your head! Dammit Beth, ain't that, ain't that enough?" She reaches for him and he steps back. So she lets her arms drops to her sides and she just stares at him until it becomes to much and she looks down. She hears his footsteps going away, knows the sound of his crossbow as he slips it over his head. And she isn't surprised not one bit, when he says,
"'M goin' out." He always runs when things get to be to much for him. She starts to follow and Sasha stops her.
"Don't. I'll go. Watch him so he doesn't do anything stupid. Maybe you need to make sure you don't either." The words sting, a little. She doesn't expect anyone to understand. Not completely. She can't do anything but stand there and watch as Sasha shoulders her rifle and leaves the way he went. so that what she does.
Once Daryl leaves the meeting goes a bit smoother. Only because Beth is able to focus. She couldn't feel his eyes on her. Couldn't feel his fear and his anger. Maggie isn't any more happy with the suggestion that Beth be used as bait than Daryl was, but at least she's listening to Rick and Jesus and Dwight. No one really wants Dwight involved at all, but he is. Because like Beth he's gonna be a major player in what happens.
Beth wishes Carol we're here. She would have a lot to say and Beth thinks that she would think hard, like Rick is doing, about how this could all go down and actually work. She wouldn't just write it off because it's Beth. Little Beth Greene being put in the face of danger. That's the hardest pill for her to swallow right now. But Carol left. She chose to walk away because it was too much for her. And that's her choice. Beth won't walk away. She can't.
"I am strong you know. I'm well aware of what could happen. But I also know how this family works as a team and I would trust all of you to keep me safe." Beth blurts this out in a quiet moment. These thoughts that have been going round in her head. She's always been protected, needed protection. She remembers Dawn's harsh words in the hospital, and Daryl's at the moonshine cabin.
'How many people had to risk their lives to save you?'
'Never relied on anyone for protection before!'
'I saw this the night you came in. Is this bullshit, too? Some people just aren't meant for this life, and that's okay.'
'I sure as hell never cut my wrists looking for attention!'
She was that girl a long time ago. But she's changed. They all have. She can't do this alone. Not like Rick or maybe even Daryl could if circumstances were different, but she can be a part of the team.
"Of course you are. No one is saying you aren't capable Beth. This man is a psycho, a maniac, and he's unpredictable. We just got you back. It's hard. For all of us. Hardest for Daryl I think.." Michonne is looking at her now and Beth realizes that the way Michonne looks at her has changed. The woman has always been good to her. After sharing their stories they kind of formed an unspoken bond. But there's also a newfound respect in her gaze. Beth just nods, that's all she can do because this is too heavy.
"What are you gonna do to protect her? You think Negan will buy it if you guys are all surrounding her? What he did to Abraham.. " Maggie isn't going to be easily convinced either.
Dwight hasn't said much the entire time, just backed up a few things that Jesus has said. Beth guesses he said what he needed to say out by the gates. When it's time to come up with an actual plan he'll have more to add.
All eyes are on Beth and she's so tired of being the center of everything. She actually misses being back at the prison and feeling like she was invisible. She took care of Judith and no one ever really paid her any mind. Now she's come back from the dead and suddenly everything she does is under scrutiny, at least by her family.
"Rick it's not so simple. Think about it.. He's gonna wonder how we got her, who she is to us, and if she belongs with us. It won't work that way." Michonne is shaking her head and Beth is looking back and forth between her and Rick.
"She's right. You can't be where he can see you. You'll have to be hidden and wait. You're all going have to trust me. He's going to have to trust me." Dwight knew this all along, Beth can see that from the expression on his face and he isn't smug and he doesn't seem all that happy about it either. She's betting he waited for them to come to this conclusion on their own because bringing it up before would surely incur Daryl's wrath, again.
"No! You think Daryl is gonna agree to this?" Maggie glares at Beth, but it doesn't reach her eyes. There's only fear there.
"He isn't going to agree. It's gonna tear him apart." Glenn is watching her too, but he isn't glaring like her sister. He just looks scared. She knows it's true. All of it. But there isn't any other way. No one has come up with anything else. This is the way. The only way.
She told him he could be there. Told him he could hold onto her the whole time. Said they'd run if it went bad. She meant it then. But he can't.
"Why you followin' me?" Daryl's been listening to her footsteps behind him for the last ten minutes.
"Making sure you stay outta trouble. And getting the hell outta that mess of a meeting." Sasha matches his pace.
"Yer too fuckin loud. Gonna have every walker out here on us." He isn't feelin' sociable right now.
"I know that Dixon, did it on purpose. I don't want to get shot by one of your arrows." His only response it a grunt because she's probably right. The way he's feeling right now he'd probably shoot first. He needs to calm the fuck down and focus.
"It ain't gonna work, their little plan. She thinks that, that bastard's just gonna come out and accept her as our offerin' without givin' it a second thought? Ain't he gonna wonder where she come from? How all' a sudden we got our hands on somethin' he wants? Ain't gonna work, he's gonna know she's ours. Might already." He's gonna know she's his. He feels his heart pounding again and the rage slowly building inside him. Because thinking about this, putting her in danger, using her is terrifying. She said he could hold on to her. He can't hold on to her. A groan from the trees signals a walker and he forgoes the crossbow, pull his knife out instead. He falls on the corpse stabbing it repeatedly until Sasha is hissing his naming and grabbing for his arms.
"Daryl! Stop! I know, I know. Maybe we need to be back there voicing these things so the rest of them think about them." The look on her face, Daryl knows she wants to tell him he can't run away every time things get hard. Or is that the voice in his own head? And he wants to be back there. Being too far from Beth makes him anxious.
'Pussywhipped, little brother..'
'Fuck you Merle!'
Daryl wipes the knife on the ground and sheaths it. When he stands he looks at Sasha and nods.
"Les' go back then." He's gonna make sure she doesn't do this. At least not alone.
They're just wrapping up when Daryl and Sasha come back. Beth hears the door and she's on her feet even before they make it into the livingroom. Sasha comes all the way in and puts her weapons on the island in the kitchen. Daryl lingers in the doorway and his eyes are on Beth and she doesn't even think about it, just goes to him. He apparently has been thinking because he pulls her close and rest his chin on her the crown of her head.
"How 'em I gonna be there with ya? How's that gonna work? It ain't Beth." His voice is low and his words are meant only for her and she nods because she knows. He has been thinking.
"I don't want this to hurt Daryl."
"Everythin' hurts Beth."
Daryl and Beth are standing in the doorway when Jesus and Dwight head in their direction to leave. Beth feels Daryl stiffen against her and his breathing is coming faster, little pants and she takes his hand and leads him to the stairs.
"Ain't gonna work that way. You know it." Daryl stands facing away from Dwight at the bottom of the stairs.
"No it won't. You're gonna have to decide if you can trust me Daryl." Then they're gone and Beth tugs gently at his hand.
Daryl wakes up to shadows. It's early. He doesn't think about his crossbow or even leaving this bed. Beth's breath is warm on his chest and her hair is in his face tickling his nose. The rest of her is soft skin wrapped around him and tangled in the sheets that they somehow got lost in last night. Because all of a sudden there was an urgency in being together, him being on her, in her and she refused to let go, whispered in his ear, 'I need you Daryl.. I need this.' And he has a problem denying her anything, at least as far as this is concerned. To be honest he knows he wanted it just as much as her, maybe more.
It wasn't soft and sweet, it was desperate and rough and he remembers at one point her hair was wrapped in his fist and he forced her head back so he was able to leave marks on her neck, his marks. He fingers the hair at her neck now, brushes it back and they're there, the marks. Small dark red spots. He should feel something shouldn't he? He should be ashamed or appalled at what he did, something other than the heat he feels in his groin. But he wasn't alone in this. His shoulder smarts and he glances at it and can make out a bite mark. This wasn't them intentionally trying to hurt one another, this is their fear. Even when he was thrusting into her so hard they will both probably have bruises on their hip bones, his mouth was in her hair begging her not to leave him again, he can't do it again, won't do it again. And it was her crying when she came, 'not leaving you, promise you Daryl.. never.. I'm never..' After, they laid there catching their breath, slowing the frantic beating of their hearts, he'd given her an ultimatum. Curled around her, his arms holding her, he'd told her,
"Ya ain't doin' this without me. M' gonna be there or it ain't happenin'. I'll leave, take you and leave and no one will find us, no one will ever take ya away from me again." He's not sure she heard him, although he could've sworn there was the tiniest hitch in her breathing. Then she sighed and slid her arms around him and he felt her thumb at the small of his back lightly making circles and that's the last thing he remembered until now.
She's becoming just as perceptible as him. He notices her eyes on him. They flash blue and silver in the gray morning light.
"You marked me Dixon." Her voice is heavy with sleep even though her eyes are clear and settled on him. He chuckles and shrugs a shoulder in her direction.
" Wha' ya call this then?" He watches as her eyes widen just a fraction and shivers when she runs a finger over the irritated skin where she sunk her teeth in just enough to leave a mark, but not draw blood.
"I call us even." She rolls over onto her back and the sheets fall away leaving her naked from the waist up. The lighting in the room tinges her ivory skin blue. He runs a finger down her breastbone and it's her turn to shiver.
"Best be gettin' up." He murmurs as he watches her skin tighten into goosebumps, her nipples harden.
"You aren't making that easy," she breathes rolling over against him. Wrapping her arms around his neck she pulls him down beside her, rests her forehead against his. "I heard you last night.. you're not giving me any say?" He can't read her, doesn't know if she's angry or if his declaration means something else. He shakes his head slightly.
" 'M not. No." He hopes she can see it in his eyes, he's not being an asshole, he's really not.
"Daryl.." His name never changes, but the melody does. She sings his name and he knows, he knows she's there with him. He cups her chin and she nods and whispers, "Okay.. okay, Daryl."
Shortly after they got up, Beth and Daryl were greeted with good news. A group that went out the night before came back with two trucks they found hidden in a survivalist bunker a ways out west, somewhere they haven't scavenged that thoroughly. This more than fills their pantry. A small amount of medical supplies and ammunition was on the truck too. It's enough to appease Negan if he comes back early. It's a good thing, Beth thinks. And as long as there are good things they can still push forward.
They find Rick out on the porch. He's watching the others unload and distribute the things they've found. Oliva won't do an inventory until some of the food is given to the community. That was something they had agreed to last night when they weren't arguing over Beth.
Daryl leans against the banister and lights a cigarette. The smoke swirls and dissipates and Beth sighs as she glances in the direction Rick is looking.
"If there's no record of it, then it was never there. Our people eat first this time." Rick rubs his face and Beth notices, not for the first time, the deep purple shadows under the man's eyes. She watches as he looks to Daryl and she realizes that he's not looking for confirmation that Daryl heard him, but acknowledgement that he agrees with him. Daryl nods and takes the cigarette from between his teeth.
"Wha' we doin' next?" His eyes are on Rick, but Rick is looking at her. It's a heavy feeling and she thinks again of being invisible. Taking the steps down slowly one at a time she stops when she's standing on the walkway below them.
"Find a way to make it work, with both of us.. " It hurts to say it and she isn't sure why. "Or we'll go. So he never knows I was ever here." She can't look at Rick then. Is it selfish on their part? That they would run to insure they're together when in reality they could die regardless. She doesn't know and she doesn't want to dwell on it. Because it hurts.
"Wouldn't have let you do it alone anyway." His words are like a physical force and she feels her breath that she didn't realize she was holding rush out of her body leaving her weak. The sun has just finally broken through the early morning cloud cover and in that ray of light that hits the porch she can see Daryl's hands tremble at his sides. His eyes are on Rick.
"You think I could man? You really think.." Rick reaches for Daryl and curls a hand around his neck. Beth is back on the steps taking them slowly, watching, she isn't sure if it's the sunlight or Rick's words that has Daryl's eyes glistening, but he ducks his head and she can't even see their blue anymore. "I won't, I won't. I'll send you both away first." For a few seconds Daryl's head is against Rick's chest and now she knows it's not the sun. Then he's standing again wiping his face, nodding and glancing over at Beth.
"We'll make it work, but we keep her safe. We keep our family safe." Rick looks to her and she can't help the small whimper that slips out as she slides under his arm and rests her cheek against the wet spot where Daryl's face was only moments before.
The next morning Beth watches from the lookout as Daryl, Glenn and Maggie head for the Kingdom. They'd decided last night that these trips needed to be made. It's time to get things moving in the direction they want.
This one day trip is meant to convince the leader there that it's in his best interest to join forces with Alexandria and the Hilltop and end Negan once and for all. Rick headed for the Hilltop earlier, on his own to meet up with Jesus.
She lowers herself down and lets her legs dangle over the wall and she watches them go. There's a lump in her throat and it hurts. The black beanie pulled down over her blonde hair is something she promised Daryl she'd wear. She won't admit it, but it makes her feel better when she's outside. Although he'd prefer she stay inside, in their room, probably in the closet under a blanket if he had his way. That won't happen though and he knows it. He keeps turning and walking backwards watching her, a part of her wishes he wouldn't. He's too far now for her to see his face clearly and being that he's with others he's probably doing a good job hiding what's going on inside his head and heart. She on the other hand isn't quite as strong as him and once she's sure he can't see, she buries her face in her hands and lets the tears fall that have been threatening to all morning.
"Hey Beth?" She feels the wooden lookout vibrate with a knock from below. Sighing she brushes the tears away and tries to calm herself. It's okay to cry, it's okay to be sad but for some reason right now she doesn't want anyone to perceive her as weak at all.
"Yeah?" Enids head pops up over the edge of the lookout as the girl makes her way up the ladder.
"I'm sorry.. I know you probably want to be alone, but.. look I was thinking maybe we could go out, just a little ways and do some target practice? I would feel better if I could do something ya know?" She smiles a little at Beth and her smile gets bigger when Beth laughs.
"Yeah.. yeah okay. I'm just.. a mess, kinda. I guess." That's putting it mildly, but she'll be fine. He'll come back and it will be ok.
"I get it. You don't have to explain." She starts back down the ladder and Beth follows.
"I'd ask you if Daryl put you up to this, but he would never suggest leaving the walls." Beth concentrates on her feet as they hit each rung. Solid. The ladder, the ground, everything is solid and she won't fall apart.
"Oh yeah.. Um we don't have to leave if.." Enid starts.
"No. We do. Sometimes Daryl is too overprotective. We aren't going far. And I'll tell Carl." Beth hops the rest of the way down.
"Yeah about that.. Could we maybe not tell Carl." Beth eyes the younger girl and suddenly it dawns on her. This girl and Carl. How did she not see it before?
"Oh! No.. we won't tell Carl. How about Rosita? Or Aaron, yeah I think Aaron is our safest bet." Going out and doing something productive makes Beth feel 100 percent better. And this with Enid, it's almost like her and Maggie before everything fell apart. It's a kind of normal thing to do.
Of course when they tell Aaron he doesn't think it's so normal and he's probably just as overprotective as the people they were avoiding telling. But he agrees on one condition.
"I'm coming with you." He's already grabbing ammo from a box under a pile of motorcycle parts and shoving it in his bag. "I could use the practice too."
Of course it's Sasha who's at the gate and from the set of her features Beth knows that she doesn't like that the three of them are venturing outside the walls.
"It's just for a little while and we aren't going far. I need to do something Sasha." Beth does her best to keep her voice from betraying her, letting Sasha know that she's doing her best to hang on here amidst everything else they have going on. And maybe Sasha gets that because she nods at Beth and even gives her a smile small.
"You get the other figured out?" She's referring to the whole using Beth as bait and her reaction, so many of their reactions pull Beth in all kinds of directions. Family. It's still here and it's just a strong as it was when there was another family at the prison.
"We'll make it work. There's nothing set yet." Beth toes the dirt and avoids looking directly at the other woman.
"You're doing it with him then?" This all Sasha really wants to know. And Beth gets it. She isn't weak, but this is family. They do this together. Or they don't do it at all. It isn't a choice.
"Yeah." Sasha's small chuckle surprise Beth and she raises her eyes to her.
"Good. That's good Beth. I'm gonna be there too. For him." The last two words come out softly and Beth knows it's about Abraham. There was something there between those two. "Go. But don't stay long. I'll be here. Whistle means come back ok?"
They nod and head out and it's warm and Beth hears birds calling to each other and maybe for just a little while they can enjoy the day.
The decision not to take a car had seemed like the best one yesterday. Maggie felt like walking would be ok, and if they had to run, she'd run. Whatever decision her and Glenn had come to regarding her condition and how far she was willing to push it was their business. Daryl didn't feel it was his place to say much, but watching Maggie now he wishes he'd said more. It's obvious this is harder on her than she thought. The trip itself had been mostly uneventful. They'd encountered a few walkers in the woods and one on the road, but nothing they couldn't handle.
"Gonna find a car or something to take back." Daryl glances at Glenn and sees the relief in his eyes. Maggie's a force to be reckoned with. She probably pushed and Glenn had most likely relented. Daryl understood that. He had his own Greene girl to contend with. But sometimes you just had to stand up to them. As tiny as Beth was, Daryl sometimes felt like he was facing down a hurricane.
"I'm okay. Just tired." Maggie breathed.
" Mmhmm.. just the same we're finding a vehicle." Daryl pushed ahead and he heard Glenn chuckle.
"See it's not just your overprotective husband." The two of them bantered back and forth as they walked and Daryl wondered what Beth was doing. Probably something he'd disagree with. So he didn't think to long on that and just watched the road ahead of him. Off to the right there was a small house. Old and derelict, but to his seasoned eye it had been and might still be inhabited by someone. He slowed and let the others catch up to him.
"Hang on. Think we got company." Daryl moved back off the road and into the ditch that ran beside it. They all three watched as a man on horseback emerged from the trees behind the small house.
"That's Morgan." Maggie whispered. Daryl felt his heartbeat speed up. If that was Morgan then it was quite possible Carol was here too. The man had gone to find her and he looked like he was well and the sack at his side might be carrying supplies to the little house. Glenn started to step forward.
"Go easy.. " Daryl raised his arms and gave a slight whistle. The man focused on them immediately and they came up and out of the ditch slowly so he could see them.
"Daryl? Glenn?..." He slid off the horse and tied its reins to the front gate and approached them in the road. The smile on his face was genuine and he opened his arms to Maggie. "You're here?" When his eyes met Daryl's he read the question waiting there and nodded towards the house. "She's there. She's good. Stubborn, but good."
Daryl didn't wait for the others, his focus was on the little house and his heart beating so hard he felt like it was gonna burst out of his chest. He hadn't not thought of Carol. He'd just put her in the back of his mind, because there were only so many things he could handle at once and there had been so much, there still was. And he knew that she could take care of herself. She'd made the decision to go and he respected that. But she was here now.
The gate squeaked as he opened it and he heard the front door and then she was standing there. He looked at her for a second before he closed the distance, jogging to meet her in the doorway. She laughed as she wrapped her arms around him.
"Ya left?" He can feel a whole bunch of emotions just below the surface.
"I had to." She moves back and holds him at arm's length just looking at him. He didn't understand the having to leave part until last night, some things might be worth leaving for.
"Everyone good?" He eyes her realizing she doesn't know all that they've gone through and he shakes his head.
"No. We're here to get help. We gotta take this bastard out."
They spent some time at Carol's and brought her and Morgan up to speed on what was going on, what had happened, and what they planned on doing. Neither Carol nor Morgan stepped up and agreed to go back to Alexandria with them. It seemed like this was home for them now. Daryl realized this was their choice but with Carol it hurt somewhat.
"Bring Beth here, she can stay out of sight…." Carol starts, but Daryl was shaking his head even before she finished.
" Can't do that. She's gonna be with me. That's all." Daryl turns away from the group as if this is his final word until Maggie speaks up.
"Beth is the bait. They want to lure Negan out using her." Daryl isn't sure if she's actually accusing him or if she's just frustrated and tired. The expressions on Carol and Morgan's face are similar to what they saw in the meeting at Rick's. Shock. Plain and simple.
"Wasn't my choice, wasn't my idea! Your sister got that in her head.. fuckin' Dwight! Ain't gonna happen that way. I won't let it and neither will Rick." Suddenly all Daryl can think about is getting this over with, meeting with the leader and heading home. "We need ta get going, meet this Ezekiel guy.. You ain't comin' back with us?" Daryl has to ask. He doesn't even look at her while he does because he already knows her answer and a part of him feels let down. The part that has learned to let people in, to depend on others, but everyone has to decide what's best for them.
"I'll be here. Anyone is welcome. I just can't.. I can't do it anymore, what needs to be done." That's all she offers and it's enough for Daryl. Maggie is in tears though and she hugs Carol and makes her promise to send word with someone if she ever decides she wants to come home. Carol nods and rests a hand on Maggie's small belly.
"Take care of this one. Take care of everyone." The two women hug. And Glenn moves in for a hug too.
"Daryl I can take you to him, Ezekiel. I know where he is." Morgan says and Daryl nods in agreement. Accepting that this is what they will give, this will be their part. He feels Carol's arms around his middle and he hugs her back, tight. When he looks down into her face it seems like she might be wanting to say something, but he wants it left how it is. No more words to make things harder so he just shakes his head and steps out of her embrace.
"It's been good Daryl. I'll see you again." Carol touches his cheek and kisses his forehead and he turns and leaves the others to finish whatever they need to finish. He has to get out. None of this is easy. And he thinks that if Beth were here, just her touch would make it all a little better. Cause that's what the people you love do, they stand beside you and weather the storm.
It's late afternoon and Beth is sitting at the kitchen table feeding Judith peaches and trying to pretend everything's okay. But with Daryl gone and Maggie gone it really isn't ok. Michonne got wind of the fact that they were outside the walls and she came and joined them. She did her best not to let her face show what she was really feeling and she even gave Enid a few pointers on her aim. But she didn't let them stay out. She came to bring them in. Beth knew that when she saw the other woman coming through the trees. They wrapped it up and went back in. Beth had said little to Michonne about it, not wanting to sound like a brat, which is what she was feeling like in that moment.
"Do you know what he'd do to me, if anything happened?" Michonne said lightly
from where she was leaning on the island.
"I don't need a babysitter." Beth cringed inside because this was exactly what she didn't want to sound like.
"No you don't. And I'm not babysitting, just being the voice of reason. I get it. You're frustrated and nervous. Don't you think I feel it too?! Rick is out there and whenever any of us is out there and the others are left behind it's this way. You know that. I just think it's our responsibility to take precautions for the ones who are coming home, so we can be here when they get here." Michonne walks over and sits beside her and the baby. "We need to be here. That's our job right now." Judith giggles and hold a peach slice out for Michonne.
"Ok. I know. We're here." Beth watches the woman interact with the baby and can't help but smile. Footsteps from upstairs alert them to the fact that Carl and Enid have left their post on the roof. Carl took to sitting up there sometimes when he wasn't on watch, especially at times when his dad or Michonne were outside the walls. Beth knows it's his way of dealing with things. And you can't begrudge a person for finding ways to cope.
"Gates opening. I think it's dad coming back." He is out the door before Michonne and Beth can even react, Enid on his heels. Beth scoops up Judith.
"Let's go see what's going on baby girl.. How about that?" She glances at Michonne to confirm that this is ok and the three of them head out to meet Rick.
The Kingdom is a farce. Daryl does his best to keep his mouth shut and his expression neutral, but he can't believe what he's seeing. It's like everybody is playing dress up. Sure they have a lot of really good things going on. There are animals and gardens and people have shelter. There's a sense of community, but it's insanity. The reality of it settles heavy on Daryl's shoulders. He had hoped they'd find soldiers here, fighters who will be able to stand with them against Negan. Maybe this is why Negan had gotten as far as he has. He really is dealing with people who are weaker and scared. Morgan is watching Daryl, has been since they walked in this place.
"I know what it looks like Daryl. But it works," Morgan says.
"I bet. Cause these people do whatever Negan tells 'em. Eventually he'll destroy 'em." Daryl knows it isn't fair to be angry at Morgan, no reason to be angry at anyone. This is just the way it is. And it needs to be changed.
"We need soldiers. People who can fight." Maggie has been watching as close as Daryl has. So she doesn't miss the way Morgan's mouth tightens at the word fight. "Whatever your beliefs are Morgan, these people need to learn to defend themselves even it if means killing. You only get to choose for yourself."
Ain't that the truth, Daryl thinks. He's dumbfounded by the idea that killing doesn't need to be an option. Sometimes killing is the only option. He'd never put those he loves at risk. All life is not precious, not when they are a threat. Morgan doesn't have response for Maggie, he just continues on and leads them into an auditorium. Daryl has to shake his head when Morgan meets a man at the door and says, 'May we have audience with the King?' Daryl looks over at Maggie and Glenn and they look just as bewildered as Daryl feels. He has a sick feeling this whole trip is going to end up a big waste of time.
The news Rick brings back from the Hilltop has Beth feeling like they can do this, they can get rid of Negan. The community is onboard and Jesus will have a group ready and waiting when the time comes.
"We talked about how we could make it happen, with you and Daryl. Dwight thinks it's long shot but he gets it. And he'll go along with whatever we decide." Rick rubs his beard and picks up an apple slice. He'd brought a bag back with him from the Hilltop and Michonne cut a couple of them up. Beth nods and picks up Judith's apple slice for the third time. The baby loves the apples, but she's having a hard time holding on to it.
"I'm gonna go upstairs.. Just for a.." It's getting late and Rick is already back and she can't help but wonder where Daryl, Maggie and Glenn are. It'll be dark soon. Her face must have given her away, she isn't good at hiding her feelings, especially when it comes to Daryl.
"Going out on the roof?" Rick asks gently. Beth just looks back at him and bites her lip. "He's coming back Beth. They had a lot more to do and see. It's gonna be okay." Rick reaches over and lays his hand on hers. She does her best to give him a smile, but it's small and she knows it's not very convincing. Then she slips away, up the stairs and into her room. Her window happens to have roof access too, she just never thought about using it the way Carl has recently started using his. She scrambles up the slope of the roof and sidles across the shingles to the peak. This is where he sits and watches and it's perfect. She breathes in the cool air and she can see over the walls and far off into the distance. No wonder he comes here, it's a whole different world. It's higher than their highest lookout post, above everything. The world is still a beautiful place even though it has changed drastically. An apocalypse, the fall of everything, the dead walking around, and yet it seems like this is normal. More normal than her memories of watching TV with her family, going to school or the mall. The sun is beginning to set and the sky is all pinks and purples and she remembers her science teacher telling the class that the only reason a sunset is red and orange is because of pollution. Without it we'd see a very different sunset in areas that are heavily populated. And Beth thinks that maybe he was right. She is trying to think back to the last time she saw a sunset that left the sky the color of blood. It's been awhile. But it's still beautiful. All of it. Nature hasn't changed, it's just taking over, taking back what it lost to men.
Way out on one of the main roads that runs into Alexandria, Beth sees a very dim set of headlights. The fact that there are headlights leads Beth to believe that it's them. It's Daryl coming home. Anyone trying to sneak up on them wouldn't use headlights. Possibly not even a car. She watches for a few more seconds and when she hears Sasha's shrill whistle she makes her way back inside. She doesn't even stop to tell Rick and Michonne, just calls over her shoulder as she runs out the front door.
"They're coming. I saw a car."
Sasha is already at the gate tugging it open and the car pulls off into the grass and weeds where the old watch tower went down. Beth isn't running yet, but she's watching closely, ready to take a headcount of the three, yes there are three people, who left and have now returned. She sees his shaggy head and the outline of the crossbow in the dwindling light and she is running now. Which is ridiculous. He was gone for what 12 hours? She doesn't care if she looks like a crazy person, he's back and that's all that matters to her right now and she's out the gate and crashing into him where he stands and she hears the umpf! and feels his exhalation on her head.
"Damn girl, I'm gonna have to leave more often if this is the homecoming I get." His growl is a welcome sound in her ear and his smile when he cups her face in his hands makes her want to cry. Daryl rarely shows her outright affection when other people are around unless he's upset. This, his hands on her face, his smile and the soft kiss he brushes on her lips is proof that he's just as crazy as she is.
"I'm sorry! I just.. I don't feel right when you aren't with me." It's quiet and she knows that all eyes are probably on them so she loosens her grip intending to step away, give him a little space, but he wraps his arm around her and pulls her close and starts walking towards the gate.
"Me neither." If it's actually possible to still feel bliss, then Beth is feeling that right now. Even the giggles coming from Carl and Glenn can't bring her down.
"I'm feeling the urge to read a romance novel? Our library have any of those?" Sasha too?
"Y'all shut the hell up." Daryl calls over his shoulder. He gives Beth a little wink as Rick joins them. "Don't even think about it Grimes." Rick hold his hands up in mock surrender.
"I'm not saying anything. But can I borrow your rag.. I'm feeling a little misty eyed." Daryl forges ahead practically dragging Beth along. She realizes that it's all in good fun but thinks Daryl may be at his limit.
"Ignore them. How was it, the Kingdom?" Beth asks trying to change the subject.
"Was a damn joke. All make believe with a King and knights.. Jesus Beth I wish you coulda seen it." The climbed the porch stairs and waited for the others. "Saw Carol though. She's okay. Morgan too."
"They aren't coming back?" Beth asked. Daryl chewed on his thumb nail and shook his head. Beth could see how much this was bothering him. She slipped her hand in his and squeezed gently as the rest of the group joined them.
"Glenn and Maggie seem to think the Kingdom is a lost cause. What about you?" Rick looked pointedly at Daryl.
"Man we got a lot ta talk about!" They could talk all night if they wanted to. Beth was just thankful they were all back under one roof for now.