The Learning Curve: Chapter 87

Bella Swan's House

There was another college rejection in my mailbox at the end of the day. It wasn't from Dartmouth, but it didn't feel good.

"You're not seriously still worried that you and Edward will end up at different schools, are you?" Alice asked. She had come to my house after school to avoid her parents for a while.

I shook my head, leaning over the notebook in my lap. We sat on my bed, attempting to study but spending more time talking than anything. "I know he'll go wherever we both get in, even if it's just U-Dub. And there's nothing wrong with that school. Before Edward, I was planning to go there. He's spent so much time talking about these great schools, though, that now it seems like going somewhere else would be a disappointment for me, too. Especially after all the work and all the money we spent applying. I mean, Edward paid half my application fees, but I still shelled out a lot. I'd hate for that to be for nothing."

Alice looked at me sympathetically. "It's tough, I know. I mean, I think about where Jasper might end up just to be near me, and I feel like I'm robbing him of something. But it's his choice. He says I care where I go to school and he doesn't, so it makes sense for him to compromise."

I nodded. "I get that. But in this case, it's Edward who cares...I'd follow him, but he's the one compromising because there are so few options for me. It doesn't seem fair."

Alice shrugged. "Not now, sure. But that's a relationship for you. You're going to have to be the one compromising eventually. If you start comparing your compromises and adding them up, you're going to drive yourself crazy."

I remembered what I'd promised Edward, that we wouldn't keep score.

"You're right, Alice," I said, resolving to let it go.

We worked on our homework quietly for a while until I realized Alice had pulled out Edward's list and was studying it.

"Are you going to go to one?" I asked her quietly.

She looked at me pensively. "I don't know. I know it would get my parents off my back for a while, and better that I choose the doctor than they do. But I feel like I should be fighting them on this. It feels like...like if I go to a shrink, then I'm admitting that it's all in my head."

"It could also be the first step to proving that it's not in your head."

Alice sighed. "I guess at least it could get me through the summer. Then I can go to college and not have to deal with this anymore."

I nodded, understanding.

Alice looked down at her chemistry textbook. "I just wish they'd believe me."

She sounded so sad that I had to reach over and hug her in spite of the books and papers that crinkled between us.

"Everything will be okay, Alice," I told her. "I don't need dreams of my own to say that."

A/N: Late chapter is late.

Aww, you guys. You think I've been resisting the peer pressure to have sex, when honestly, no one's ever pressured me in the slightest. I'm just waaay behind the curve when it comes to romance. Next confession? Never been kissed. I'm a freaking Drew Barrymore movie.

I've been asked how the kitten is doing. Mr. Rafa is thriving. He's getting fat, and he loves his momma. He's not all that into my mom, which is hilarious, because her cat absolutely loathes me. Payback, man.

See you all later!