Disclaimer: Spirit Away and it's caracters are not mine, i just play with them

Chihiro

The figure standing in the light made me a little scared. Because I couldn't see the person or whatever it was, I felt somewhat afraid. Thoughts rang through my head.

Who was it? What was going on?

But before I could get accustomed to the light shining in from the room, the figure disappeared.

I blinked, trying to see clearly. It was still dark outside, telling me it was still night or early morning. The sun would come out soon. I could feel it even if I didn't have a clock to show me the exact time.

I stretched, trying to make myself wake up. I needed to find out who had broken into the house. Maybe it had been a burglar after all, since it hadn't happened anything. If it had been one of my stepsiblings, I would not sit in the cupboard unharmed, such as I was now.

I got out of the cupboard silently, I didn't want to wake up the whole house, and if I did I knew the consequences would be horrible. Maybe they would make me go without food for the rest of the week or fail a test I knew I could top mark on. Hana didn't like getting waked up before nine on a no-working day like today. And her children took after her in that fashion. If I dared to touch the light before they woke up, even if it was in the living room on the first floor, while the bedrooms were on the second floor, she would try to strangle me.

I tried to get accustomed to the half light of the early morning, looking around the living room, trying to find evidence of the burglar or mysterious person that had been there moments before. I was sure it hadn't been a trick, there had been a person there, someone I didn't know, and it unsettled me.

A faint light started to glow in the room, lighting it dimly, making it possible to make out more contours than before. I walked on light feets to the windows, looking out at the sun starting to rise in the horizon. It was a beautiful morning. The sky had taken a faint pink glow from the sun. The sun was shining brightly yellow and had a circle of red around it.

I parted the curtains. They were white and were next to impossible to keep clean, but Hana had insisted that they should be white just because it would impress the neighbors that she could keep white curtains with children in the house. It was I who got the job with keeping them white and I washed them several time during the week, Sakure and Sakaki liked to touch them when they had dirty hands.

The light in the room became stronger because of the direct sunlight coming in through the windows. I looked around the living room again, trying to find a clue about the mysterious intruder. But there were no sign of breaking in or out and nothing of the stuff in the living room was taken or moved from the positions they had been in the day before.

"There must be something here." I mumbled to myself, making me start. Why had I spoken out loud? I just hope nobody heard me. I didn't want to get in trouble now before my exams, because if I failed my exams I wouldn't be able to go to university like I wanted. And it would also make it more difficult to move out.

Something in the corner of my left eye got my attention; the thing was shining in many different colors, like a rainbow. It was little, I could see, maybe a small stone reflecting the light outside? But it was unlikely I thought, because Hana didn't like shining stones and forbade her children from "take in something that belonged outside", as she called it.

I walked over to it, picked it up from the floor and viewed the item lying in my hand. I had never seen anything like it before, not that big, it looked like a scale without color. If I looked directly at it in the shadows it was transparent, but in the light it couth the different colors perfectly, reflecting them to the whole room. It made the room sparkle brightly.

I felt lighter seeing the display of light and different colors. It was like the rainbow colors made me safe and protected. I felt like I had gotten back something that I had lost a long time ago. Why did a scale have this effect on me? It was just a scale, but I knew it was important. How I knew I didn't know, I just knew.

I sensed more than heard someone coming into the living room hurriedly I put the scale in my pocket, hiding it from view. I didn't want anyone to take the scale away from me because I needed it. I needed it badly.

"What are you doing making so much noise in the early morning? Don't you respect the people wanting to sleep when they can?"

I turned around eying Sayori. She was a very quiet girl, almost blended in with the floor or the walls. I didn't dislike her quite as much as her sister and brother because she usually wasn't involved in the pranks, just looking from the sides. Unfortunately this gift of hers to appear invisible even in an empty room unsettled me.

"I'm sorry, the birds woke me up. I did try to be quiet."

Sayori looked at me, her eyes calculating. That was also one of the things I feared about her. She didn't stroll right into things like her siblings, but thought before doing anything. And she had a very special mind. Coming up with many different plans and things so fast a normal person had difficulties with follow her thoughts. In my mind I called her a genius, even if no one else called her that.

"I didn't ask for an apology, did I? I asked why you were making so much noise in the morning, for you to do that there must have happened something. You are usually so quiet that no one knows you're awake before you put the breakfast on the table."

I felt a little nervous. I didn't want her to wake Hana or any of the others, but I didn't want to tell her about the mysterious person either. Trying to think about an explanation while she was staring at me unmoving was really hard.

"Um… I thought I heard a noise and thought I should find out what it was. But the room was too dark to see anything so I opened the curtains."

"Did you find anything? Anything that made the noise you were talk about?"

I shook my head. "No, there was nothing."

She looked at me disbelieving. And then she shrugged, trying to look innocent, and not showing she cared about something. I felt a bit scared, when she was like that there was something going to happen, something I knew I wouldn't like.

Suddenly someone grabbed my hands from behind. And then I heard Sakakis' voice in my ear. His whispering sent shivers down my back. He had come into my personal space, and I felt really uncomfortable being held from behind where I couldn't see the person holding me.

"You know Chihiro it's not nice to lie."

I had opened my mouth to tell him I didn't lie and ask him what he talked about when…

"And don't try telling me you didn't lie. I know you are hiding something. Maybe the thing you are hiding is in one of you pockets?"

Sakure had come into the room also, she was smirking at me. When Sakaki said I hid something in my pockets she jumped forwards.

"I can search her pockets. I want to see what she thinks is so important that she would try to hide it."

"Calm down Sakure, she isn't running anywhere soon. You can search all her pockets all you want in a minute."

Sayori was standing with the window glancing out. I knew now why she was talking to me. She had distracted me from Sakaki. So that he could grab me like he did. And I knew I hated her and the rest of my stepfamily more then I had thought possible when they moved in and changed my life so drastically.

"Now let's see what she has gotten in her pockets, shall we?"

The voice of Sakaki was mocking me in my ear, telling me to try and fight him, try to get away with my "treasure", but I wouldn't fight him. I wouldn't give him the satiation of seeing me struggling.

Sakure giggled, I felt a bit sick of the sound of it. Then she stuck her hands down my pockets on the third try she found the scale.

"I found something. Do you know what it is?"

She took it from my pocket and showed it to the other two. The scale was shining in the refection of the sun, but it had lost its special glow I had seen in it before, now it looked dead and worthless.

"It's just a scale from something nasty. I don't know where she got it from but it is not important. It's just junk, throw it away Sakure, it's not something special. Maybe she got it from her mother. I actually pity her if that is a she got."

Sayori laughed, but looked at the scale with disdain, like it had done something to her personally. Maybe she had expected something more spectacular things to be I my pockets and was disappointed with the findings? I didn't know and I didn't want to know. The only thing I wanted was to get the scale back.

Suddenly Sakaki dropped my hands and I stumbled forwards, landing on the floor on all four. They all snickered. I stood up, looking at Sakure.

"Can I have it back please? It's mine and I want it back."

"Sakure looked a little on me before she looked at the scale, then back at me. Suddenly she put the scale in her back pocket.

"It is a nice thing even if it has no great value so I have decided to keep it myself."

I tried to get it back. The scale. It was important to me. Not just because it reminded me of Him, but also because I had felt safe when I held it in my hands.

I knew I couldn't go to Father or stepmother. They wouldn't care about such things, telling me it wasn't an important enough item to have any value for me.

I needed to find a way myself to get it back, without help and being discovered. It would be difficult. Impossible even. But I had to try. My sanity depended on it. Because I was slowly going crazy with the situation I lived in. The psychological abuse I had lived with for a while now was strongly on its way to destroy me from the inside.

It took me three days to come up with a plan. It was a very uncertain plan with many flaws. But I knew it was the only way to get the scale without being seen by anyone. The day I was to set the plan into action, a bomb where dropped over my head and I didn't get the chance to get the scale.

"Miss Ogino I want to talk to you, can you stay after class?"

My teacher was a really nice man. He had helped me a lot with my schoolwork so that I could get into the university I wanted to. Because of this I respected him more than anyone else.

"What is it, sensei? Is there something I can help with?"

He sighed. He was staring at his desk; suddenly he looked into my eyes. I saw pain in them. What was going on? Had there happened something to Father? Had I forgotten to deliver something from the coursework? I didn't think so…

"Miss Ogino, because of the drastic drop of your grades and inattentiveness in class it is with regret I must inform you that you won't be able to apply for your chosen university. I understand that it's difficult when a parent remarries, but your grades have dropped too far. And on the same note: you won't get a scholarship either because of the drastic drop."

I could just stare at him. My brain couldn't comprehend what he said. "…Can't apply…" "…drop of grades…" "…won't get scholarship…" What should I do now? I had failed my schooling. But my grades hadn't dropped that much had they?

"I understand sir, if you excuse me."

I fled from the classroom without waiting for the dismissal. I felt like I stood beside myself. What had happened? What should I do now? Where was I to go? I knew I couldn't return home after this. Hana would throw me out. I knew she would, I had promised her to disappear after the graduation. But now I had nowhere to disappear to.

I felt numb. Didn't know what to do anymore. I had failed myself. And now there was no turning back. I was out of the school building, running full speed. People I ran past looked at me with curiosity, but I ignored them. Didn't really see them either.

The wind on my face did nothing to wake me up from my numbness. But when I saw the canal I stopped. It was like the water sang to me. Told me to go into the water. It would protect me, hold me away from any harm, and punish the ones responsible for my distress.

Unsure I took a few step closer to the water, it bristled through me, taking all the pain and the tension away. Suddenly I felt calm, free. I wanted to get nearer the water, be surrounded by it. The water would make me safe and…

"I wouldn't do that if I was you."

The voice startled me. Was there someone speaking to me? Turning around I saw a young girl standing a few feet away from me. She couldn't be more than ten-eleven years old. She had startling green eyes and black hair. She was unnatural pale and had an aura around her of wisdom beyond her years.

"Why shouldn't I do it? I am older than you, you don't understand the problems of an adult. You don't even know me so how can you say that."

The girl smiled a little smile. It was really nice, made her look like an angel. She turned away from me and walked down to the canal. When she reached it, she put her hand in the water and splashed it.

"Do you know the name of this river?"

I blinked at her. Name? River?

"There aren't any rivers here." The confusion evident in my voice. "This is a canal."

"This was once a river, and since it was a river once it still is a river. Even if the river get a new form or a new way it is still a river. The river will flow always even if it isn't called a river anymore."

"What are you talking about?"

"Do you know the name of this river, Chihiro?"

Too confused to understand her, I shook my head.

"This is the Kohaku River. Long ago it is said that this river would help the ones in need if they brought a gift to it. A sacrifice if you want. If you want to live, the sacrifice needed to be something valuable to the person who wanted the help. The item needed to be more valuable than the persons own life."

The Kohaku River. Who would have thought I would stumble across the Kohaku River? I didn't know if the girl was telling the truth, but the things she told were just a fairytale of old days. Or was it? When I was three, Haku saved me. What had I sacrificed then? Suddenly I remembered my favorite shoe vanish with the currents in the water. Had that been my sacrifice?

I turned to the girl, intended to ask her about what she meant about "the item needed to be more important than the persons own life". But she was gone. Nowhere in sight.

I sighed. What should I do know? Go home? Facing Hana's wrath wasn't something I looked forward to. But I knew I needed to go too that house one more time. I needed something from the house. A new path opened before me.

When I came back to the house, it was dark. Everyone had gone to bed, not waiting for me. I knew they wouldn't wait. I was after all eighteen years old and could take care of myself.

I found the key in my pocket, and silently locked up the door. The first thing I did was going into the kitchen. From my backpack, I had taken it with me from school without thinking; I got paper and a pen.

After scratching down a letter, I left the kitchen and entered the living room. Inside the cupboard I got my picture of Haku. I felt sad that I should depart with it, but I didn't need it anymore.

Quietly I got up the stairs and into my old bedroom. I hadn't been there since the day I moved to the cupboard. It wasn't too changed, all my old dragon pictures were still on the walls, and the furniture was the same old. But the room seemed different somehow.

Slowly I walked towards the nightstand, I knew the item I needed would be there. When I found it I laid the only dragon picture I had taken with me on the nightstand instead of. A trade of items. Even if the items were both mine from the beginning. I was after all fair.

With the needed item, I walked back down out the door. I locked it and lay the key under the doormat. Turning away from the door of the house that had been my home for the last eight years I walked towards the canal. No, not the canal: the Kohaku River.

When I came closer I could hear the song again calling for me. Holding hard into the scale in my hand, taking a deep breath, I walked into the River and let the currents take me.

The next morning, when the Ogino household woke up, they got a shocking surprise. Mr. Ogino was fast on the phone talking to the police. Not many minutes later, there were police officers sitting in the little kitchen.

They got to see the letter Chihiro had written. Afterwards they spoke to the central, and a search party was made. They searched everywhere even in the canal, but no one found a body, and there was no trace of Chihiro traveling away from the city.

The sudden disappearance of Chihiro Ogino started various investigations, trying to find out why a young woman would disappear like she did. What the investigators found out shocked an already shocked city.

Hana was charged with child abuse against her stepdaughter, driving her to what she did. She was sentenced to four years in prison and to never have any contact with her three children again. Sakure, Sayori and Sakaki were placed in children's home. The school was charged with not taking signals seriously and had to pay a great deal of money to Mr. Ogino.

Mr. Ogino was left alone. He knew he should be sentenced to prison himself, for the way he had treated his daughter the last few years. He was as guilty in child abuse as Hana. But he was never charged. In the end he ended up alone in his house, sitting in the living room, drinking and looking at the letter from Chihiro.

Goodbye Father

I am sorry to say that I can't be here any longer.

I had an agreement with Stepmother that I would move out as soon as I graduated, but today my teacher told me I would not be able to graduate because of the big drop of my grades.

Because I keep my promises I will leave the house now.

But this is not the only reason I leave, the other reason is because I don't feel welcome in the household anymore. I am no longer a part of the family. Do you ignore me because Hana told you to ignore me, or because I remind you of Mother?

Tell Sakure that I haven't stolen from her, because technically the item I took was mine from the beginning, but I have traded it for the picture she always wanted but never got the chance to take from me.

I don't think we will meet again Father, but know that I will finally be happy. (I haven't been truly happy since Mother died.) And I wish you a happy life in the future, and I am truly sorry I can't be there to experience it myself.

Good wishes

Chihiro