Michonne set her trap and waited, the descending afternoon sun signaling night's approach. In her hiding place, crouched behind a dense juniper bush, she tried to focus on the ticking of the kitchen timer. But flashes of Rick kissing Jessie kept popping into her head.
She had anticipated his anger, his rage even, but his betrayal had completely blindsided her. Michonne slowed her breathing to counter the pressure building in her temples. Why her, of all people? She admitted Jessie was attractive, in a desperate kind of way. Her sad eyes and weak disposition screamed for someone to rescue her. And Rick had foolishly heeded her call.
While part of Michonne believed Rick really wanted to help Jessie, the other part suspected he had just wanted to take a jab at Michonne's pride.
Within seconds of meeting Pete, Michonne had pegged him for a misogynist with an inferiority complex. So when she'd heard the gossip about him beating his wife, she had been disgusted, but not surprised. Scum like him enjoyed preying on the vulnerable.
The kitchen timer sounded, the shrill noise echoing through the darkening woods. Michonne estimated that any walkers within a quarter mile would be drawn by the sound and she planned to dispose of every last one of them.
"What the hell are you doing?" a woman's voice asked from out of nowhere.
Michonne whipped around to find Sasha squinting in confusion, a sniper rifle resting at her side.
"Are you following me?" Michonne raised her voice in irritation.
"I spotted you from the tower." Her voice was clear and calm and very Sasha.
"Go home. I'm not in the mood for company."
"Then you should learn how to cover your tracks better."
Since arriving at Alexandria, she and Sasha had hardly seen each other. Michonne had been busy with Rick and constable duties, while Sasha was either manning the tower or teaching at the community school.
Michonne sucked her teeth. "And you should learn to mind your own business."
She and Sasha had grown close during their time on the road together, and Michonne valued her friendship. But now Sasha just felt like an annoying little sister.
"Tyrese used to say the same thing, until he realized it made absolutely no difference."
"Shhh," Michonne said, motioning for Sasha to crouch beside her.
Michonne heard their moans before she saw the group of walkers. A man, long dead, stumbled into the clearing where the timer lay, followed by six more of his kind.
Sasha raised her sniper rifle and Michonne placed a hand on the barrel, stilling the woman's movements.
"I got this," Michonne said, before darting into the clearing.
"There are too many!" Sasha yelled from behind her, but Michonne ignored her, rushing toward the walker mob.
Sasha's yells had alerted them to her presence and they shambled in her direction, meeting her halfway.
Michonne slid her katana from behind her back, the familiar movement snapping her into killing mode. This rush – this bloodlust – was exactly what she needed to block out the pain of Rick's betrayal.
She slammed her boot against the chest of the first walker, knocking him to the ground. Michonne raised her katana above her head, disgusted by the gore hanging from the corner of the walker's mouth. She brought her sword down hard, stabbing the creature dead center through his forehead.
Michonne had just enough time to remove her blade before the next walker was on her, forcing her to twist around and slice aimlessly through the air. Luckily her blade connected with its neck, decapitating the walker in one swing.
Shots rang out and two of the walkers furthest from Michonne dropped to the ground, motionless.
"Damn it, Sasha!" Michonne yelled, disappointed at missing the chance to end those monsters.
"Let me help you!" Sasha said as she aimed her sniper rifle in the direction of two walkers lurching straight for Michonne.
"I don't need your help!" Michonne headed for the two remaining undead. She spread her legs, katana raised in front of her, gripping the handle tightly. Once they were less than a foot away, she spun around, decapitating them both with one swing. The satisfying thud of their heads hitting the ground relieved the tension building in her gut. Michonne breathed heavily, catching her breath.
Sasha joined her, looking down at the carnage. "I think it's time you tell me what's going on with you. Is this about Rick?"
Michonne slid a soiled rag along the length of her blade, removing bits of gore and blood in one smooth motion. She stuffed the rag into her pocket. "Screw Rick."
"Everything seemed to be working out for you two. And then you show up on our doorstep like a stray puppy." Sasha stepped in front of her. "I care about you Michonne. We all do. You've got family, no matter what happened between you and Rick." Sasha placed her hand on Michonne's shoulder. "You need to talk to someone before this pain you're trying to outrun gets you killed."
As the adrenalin from the kill quickly dissipated, the hurt resurfaced, stronger than before she'd undertaken this suicidal mission.
Michonne met the concern in Sasha's eyes, suddenly yearning for the presence of another living being, to wash away the stench of death surrounding her.
"Let's get out of here," Michonne said. "It's going to be dark soon." She turned around and headed for Alexandria, with Sasha walking by her side.
Sasha broke the silence first. "I know it's been a while since we've seen each other, but you can still talk to me. Sistas gotta stick together."
Michonne smiled at Sasha's attempt at humor, feeling relief for the first time in a long while. "You're laying it on a little thick, aren't you?"
"Whatever gets you talking," Sasha said, shrugging.
Michonne's smile waned as she considered where to start. "Rick and I knew each other before the prison."
"What?"
"We met over five years ago in Atlanta. He was a witness for the prosecution in a case I was defending."
"Ok…"
Michonne could tell Sasha wanted to say more, but she remained silent, allowing her to continue.
"He was married and I was in a relationship, but we had a…connection. We spent the night together and hadn't seen each other in five years, until we crossed paths again at the prison." Michonne paused, bracing herself for Sasha's reaction.
"Ok, I've encountered some unbelievable shit in my life – we all have – but this just doesn't sound possible. The odds of meeting a one-night stand again, when you lived in completely different worlds, were slim even before the half of the human population was wiped out. So meeting one in this world…that's like fate."
Michonne had been worried that Sasha would think less of her for having an affair with a married man, but apparently that wasn't much of an issue for her friend. "Or a curse."
Sasha stopped, turning to face Michonne. "So what happened between you two? I mean recently. We all know you were together."
Michonne had suspected their relationship wouldn't remain a secret for long, not in a tight-knit community like Alexandria, where practically everyone knew each other's business.
Sasha tilted her head to the side. "Come on. It can't be that bad. Is he still in love with his dead wife? Is Carl not okay with the two of you being a couple?"
The last time Sasha had learned an intimate detail of Michonne's life, she wasted no time in relating the information to Tyrese. But, as far as she knew, that's as far as the information had gotten, since Tyrese was much better at keeping his mouth shut than his sister.
Michonne sighed, though she kept walking. She needed to tell someone, if only to process all that had happened since she'd confessed all to Rick. "Andre, my son, was Rick's."
"Nooo…" Sasha said in surprise, catching up to Michonne.
"And I had never told Rick about him – until a few weeks ago."
This last revelation completely silenced Sasha. She seemed to be considering her next words carefully. "He kicked you out when you told him?"
Michonne nodded. "And has apparently started a thing with Jessie."
"Jessie?!"
"I caught them kissing the night of the party. The night he attacked Pete."
Sasha pursed her lips and shook her head. "Man, I thought Rick had a lot more class than that. Sounds like Jessie moved on to him after she failed to get her claws in Tyrese."
Michonne was surprised by her own shock. "How long ago was this?"
"Not too long after we first arrived. She would come by for visits, bringing goodies from inventory, always paying more attention to Tyrese than anyone else in the house. And Tyrese being Tyrese, welcomed her in and accepted her gifts, completely oblivious to her true intentions. Until she tried to kiss him."
"That thirsty…" Michonne let her words trail off before she uttered the word she hated most in the world. Even if the term did fit Jessie perfectly, she refused to degrade another woman.
"Tyrese turned her down and she hasn't come around since. I think she finally figured out she was barking up the wrong tree. Tyrese is way too moral to be involved with someone who's married." Sasha looked apologetically at Michonne. "No offense."
"None taken," Michonne said, though the judgment in Sasha's words stung a little.
"Well, I hope you two can get past this; though I can understand Rick's perspective as well."
Michonne frowned at Sasha for siding with the enemy. "Yeah, but sucking face with whoever comes along." Her voice rumbled with anger and jealousy. "That's just low."
"I agree. But in my time as a kindergarten teacher, I've come to learn as much about parents as I have about kids. While some parents were the type to hand their kids off for school and never look back, others would depart with a big hug and kiss. I don't know much about Rick, but I know he's the hug-and-kiss-and-then-linger kind of dad. He would give his life to protect his children, without a second thought. So to have a son, that he couldn't protect, I'm sure he's somehow managed to blame himself for Andre's death."
Michonne doubted that, since the last time they'd spoken, he was quick to blame all of it on her. "Maybe."
"I've never met two people who were more meant to be. I really don't know what Rick would do without you, other than lose his damn mind. All this Jessie nonsense is proof of that."
"Thanks, Sasha," Michonne said, continuing toward the gates.
She still loved Rick, even if he was being an undignified jerk. Her conversation with Sasha had helped make that crystal clear. She did not plan on giving up on her true love without a fight.
As the two women walked through the gates of Alexandria, Michonne promised herself that she would try and repair what she had fractured between her and Rick. He was her soul mate and Michonne would fight Rick to the death for his heart, if that was what it took.
Michonne knocked on the door of Rick's home. It felt weird to knock on the door that had once been her own. She and Rick had shared some of the happiest moments of her life in this home. Now, she was unsure if he would even let her in.
Deanna had called a community meeting for later that night to discuss Rick's actions. She, Daryl, Carol and Glenn had met last night – without Rick – to decide how best to approach the meeting. While Carol suggested stealing weapons to arm themselves, in case of the worse, Michonne urged the group to use their contributions to Alexandria as leverage and remind Deanna of why she welcomed them into the community in the first place; and to make it completely clear that if Rick was exiled, the group would follow.
They voted unanimously for Michonne's plan, though Carol seemed a little ruffled at the prospect of attending the meeting unarmed. Michonne suspected that was why Carol volunteered her to share the news with Rick, a job no one else wanted, as Rick had been on a short fuse since the party.
Rick's front door slowly squeaked open and Michonne inhaled, holding her breath. She rubbed her sweaty palms against her jeans, feeling nervous for the first time in years, as though she were meeting a blind date.
She exhaled in relief as Carl smiled from the other side of the doorway, his eyes wide with surprise. "Michonne!" He lunged through the door and straight for her, wrapping his arms around her waist. Michonne stumbled back to catch her balance. She returned his embrace.
"Carl." Michonne hugged him tightly. She realized just how much she'd missed him these past weeks.
Rick had forbidden him to visit her and she had made Carl promise not to disobey his father. She'd had a panic attack that night, hyperventilating into a paper bag to calm her nerves. She found that crying in the dark silence of her bedroom helped to relieve most of her anxiety and to keep the attacks at bay. This moment with Carl was helping even more.
"I'm so glad you're here. Dad has been a pain since you've been gone." Carl pulled away, scrutinizing her with the wise eyes of his father. "Are you back?"
Michonne ruffled his hair. "Have you gotten taller?" she asked, avoiding the question she could not quite answer yet.
Carl frowned. "Not in the two weeks since you last saw me."
"Carl, who is it?" Rick's voice called from inside of the house.
Carl nodded for her to come in. He closed the door behind Michonne as she stepped into the foyer. "Someone wanting to talk about the patrol schedule," Carl called to Rick.
Michonne followed him to the kitchen. If an ambush was the only way to get Rick to speak to her, then so be it.
A pot clattered against the floor. "Shit!" Rick cursed from the kitchen. The frustration in his voice made Michonne consider if this was the right time for this conversation.
Carl sighed. "He's been doing all the cooking since you've gone. A kid can only take so much tuna casserole."
Michonne smiled and the knots in her gut melted away. Michonne would do everything in her power to reunite her family. She treasured Carl as much as she did her own son. And she planned to tell him about Andre as soon as she reconciled with Rick.
Carl and Michonne reached the kitchen to find Rick straining for some hidden object on the top shelf of the cupboard.
"Dad, I don't think this can wait," Carl said.
Rick poked his head out from behind the cupboard door. His expression morphed from annoyed to chilly when he spotted Michonne. He slammed the cupboard door shut. "What are you doing here?"
"We need to talk, Rick." Michonne impressed herself with the level tone of her voice, though her insides trembled with excitement. This was the first time he had spoken to her in weeks; the first time she'd been close enough to smell the cologne she'd found for him on one of her runs. He's still wearing it, she thought hopefully.
Rick glared at Michonne and started to speak when Judith's cry on the baby monitor interrupted him.
Carl rushed for the stairs, as though he were dodging a bullet. Michonne figured he was eager to escape the tension quickly building between her and Rick. "Talk to her, Dad. You need this as much as she does." And with those words, Carl disappeared up the stairs.
Rick sighed heavily and released his crossed arms. He walked over to the island, not even bothering to glance Michonne's way. He snatched a peeled onion from the countertop, cradling it in his hand. He placed it lightly on the cutting board, and slammed the chef's knife down the middle, cutting it perfectly in half. Michonne jumped at the sound, her nerves already on high alert. Rick proceeded to quarter and then slice the onion, still ignoring her.
Michonne took a deep breath and broke the silence. "We've come up with a plan for the meeting tonight."
Rick continued slicing onions, sniffing frequently. The aromatic scent of onions made Michonne's eyes water.
"Deanna is a rational and thoughtful leader. Even though she's probably pissed at you right now for breaking the rules, she knows how valuable you are. How valuable we all are. And we plan to remind her of that." Michonne paused, waiting for Rick to respond, to nod, to do something. The only sound filling the kitchen was the clap of his knife against the cutting board. "We want to make it clear that if you go, we all go."
Rick finished chopping the onions and placed the knife on the counter, finally turning to face her. Michonne's heart quickened at the gaze of his clear, blue eyes. Dense scruff covered his chiseled jaw and it looked like he was on his way to growing another beard. Michonne wanted to run the back of her hand along the bristly hairs, to stare into those beautiful eyes up close.
"I don't need your help," Rick said, crossing his arms and leaning against the kitchen island. "I don't need anything from you. Not anymore."
Michonne's heart squeezed in despair at the harsh tone of his voice. Somewhere, deep down in the pit of her stomach, she found the courage to push pass his icy exterior and make him see reason. "This is about more than just you and me. Think about Carl and what Alexandria could mean for him. If you're exiled, then he's out on the road too, since he could never not be by your side."
"Don't tell me how to handle my son. You're not his mother."
All the hurt and remorse Michonne had been feeling disappeared with those last words. The anger soon followed. Rick knew how much she cared about Carl, how she thought of him as her family, and now he was trying to use that against her to hit below the belt. Michonne was done being sorry.
"Whether you like it or not, Carl is just as much my son as Andre ever was."
Rick's eyes widened, a flicker of empathy softening his expression. "And Andre was as much a part of me as he was of you, yet I never even knew he existed." His face twisted in pain. "How can I forgive you for that?"
Michonne was familiar with the darkness of the place he was in right now – it was the same abyss she had fallen into following Andre's death. For the first time she realized that Rick was grieving the loss of his son.
"Not telling you about Andre was a mistake," Michonne said softly. "I was a coward for not telling you the second I found out I was pregnant. I admit that. But that one night completely altered the course of my life and I didn't want that for you, or your family. They needed you." She stood up straighter. "I won't apologize for not wanting to wreck your family. I understand your grief, but losing him because of my own bad choices – the pain of that is unimaginable." Her voice cracked with these last words. "I know I made the right choice, Rick."
Rick squinted his eyes. "Your choice? What about my choice? I should have been able to decide what role I played in Andre's life. That's the least I deserved."
Michonne agreed with him, but his stubbornness was beginning to irritate her. "As his mother, the one who grew and birthed and fed him, I only had one priority – for Andre to have a family. Mike was able to offer him that. I'm not sure I could say the same for you, especially considering how you've dealt with this whole situation and the people you've chosen to seek comfort from."
"You drop the biggest bombshell of my life on me and expect me to just accept it, to wallow in pain on my own?"
"You are a grown man, after all," Michonne said with venom. "Or at least I thought you were until you made out with a married woman. And Jessie at that? I thought you were better than that, Rick."
"And I thought I could trust you, Michonne. This lie...you've only made me feel like a fool; like the deadbeat father I despised and promised myself I would never become."
Michonne's anger dissipated at the look of despair on Rick's face. She looked away, afraid to admit her own role in his grief and desperation.
"I bet you and Mike had a good laugh behind my back- the backwoods sheriff who fathered your son."
"Michonne is pregnant?" Carl walked in suddenly, startling Michonne. Excitement lit his face. "I'm getting a little brother?"
Shit, Michonne thought. She didn't want to lie to Carl, but now was not the time to tell him about Andre.
"Carl-" was all that Michonne could manage before Rick cut her off.
"I'm not going to lie to you, son," Rick said, walking over to Carl. "It's time you knew the truth – about me and Michonne."
"Rick, please," Michonne said, her voice breaking.
"But I already know you're a couple. I've always known," Carl said, oblivious to the anxiety on Rick's face.
"No, son," Rick said, placing his hand on Carl's shoulder, which matched Rick's in height.
Michonne stood silent, frozen in shock.
"Michonne and I were together…long before Alexandria. Long before the prison," Rick said slowly and with intention.
"Before the prison? While you were searching for me and Mom?"
Rick shook his head. "Before that. We first met five years ago."
Carl started to speak, but stopped himself. He furrowed his brow. "What do you mean you were together?"
"Michonne and I had an affair. While I was married to your mom and while she was in a relationship with her boyfriend."
Michonne's heart dropped to the pit of her stomach. She thought she might be sick. Carl looked to her, maybe for confirmation, and Michonne looked away, unable to face what she feared would be disapproval.
She heard Carl take a step away from Rick. She looked up to find him facing his father, his fists clenched. "You cheated on mom…with Michonne? I can't believe this. I won't believe this."
Rick reached for Carl, but he dodged his father's hand. "It's the truth. And there's more."
"More? As though finding out that my dad is not only a major asshole, but that he cheated with the only other person I respect in this world, weren't enough news?"
"Watch it, Carl. I know you're upset, but there's no need for that kind of language."
"Hell yeah, there is."
"You have a right to be upset," Michonne said. She joined them from across the kitchen.
"Obviously," Carl said, glaring at her. Michonne could feel Carl's anger vibrating through her, leaving her numb.
Carl turned his glare back on Rick. "Just get it over with and tell me what else there is."
"Michonne's son – Andre – was mine. I only found out a few weeks ago."
That's right, deflect all the blame onto me, Michonne thought with distaste.
She had told Carl about Andre after reuniting with the two of them, following the Governor's attack on the prison. They had talked for hours and Carl wanted to know everything about Andre, from his birthday to his favorite cartoons. That had been the best conversation she'd had in a long time.
"Mom deserved better," Carl said to Rick before turning his back on the two of them. "And I deserve a stepmom I can trust. Don't follow me, I need some time alone," he said before escaping the kitchen. Had she lost him too? Would he ever speak to her again? Michonne shivered from the chill creeping up her spine at the thought.
Michonne had suffered all the humiliation and grief she could handle for the night. She spoke in a low tone, ignoring Rick's expression, which looked vaguely apologetic. "I could forgive the thing with Jessie, as juvenile and humiliating as it was, but I will never forgive you for this, Rick. Never."
Michonne departed, not waiting for Rick's response and not wanting to lay eyes on him any time soon. With one move, Rick had unleashed the wrath of the woman who loved him most in the world. And he had yet to experience her true fury.
A/N: Sorry for the delay, August was super busy! I'll try to make it up to you by posting the next chapter in the next couple of weeks. Thanks again for the follows, faves and reviews!