Chapter Seven - Shake It Out

Regrets collect like old friends

Here to relive your darkest moments

I can see no way, I can see no way

And all of the ghouls come out to play

It was the early hours of the morning when Jeb woke, sweating, from a nightmare. He got out of bed, splashed some water on his face from the sink in the adjoining bathroom, and pulled on his coat. He took a seat at his desk and opened one of the books on the OZ's flora that he had borrowed from the library. He was just starting the section on camomile when a blood chilling shriek came from Azkedellia's rooms.

Jeb grabbed his revolver and dashed out of his rooms and into the hallway. Saria and Meimei, wrapped in dressing gowns, were at the doorway of their room. Jeb signalled for them to follow him, and flung open the door to Azkedellia's bedroom. What he saw nearly broke his heart.

The mirror was smashed, and locks of hair were scattered across the floor. Azkedellia herself was kneeling in the middle of the mess, a shard of mirror clutched in her hand, shaking hard. She looked up at the intrusion and let out one hard sob. Immediately, Saria and Meimei went over to her bed and pulled a blanket off. They carefully wrapped it around the princess's shoulders, and Azkedellia clutched at the edges. Unsure of what he could do, Jeb stayed in the doorway.

"Go to her," hissed Saria. "She needs you. I'm going to fetch her some tea."

Startled, Jeb nodded and cautiously made his way over to the still sobbing princess. He crouched in front of her and said softly, "Your highness, come and sit in a chair. The floor can't be all that comfortable." There was no response from the princess. "Azkedellia. Az. Come and sit in a chair."

Slowly, Azkedellia stood and stumbled towards one of the armchairs that flanked her fireplace. She buried her face in her hands and curled in on herself. Jeb sat across from her, pulling the blankets closer around Azkedellia's shoulders.

"I dreamed about her," said Azkedellia between sobs, "and the things she liked to do. Hurting people. Killing people."

"It's over now," soothed Jeb. "The Witch can't hurt anyone anymore."

"It is real in my head," sobbed Azkedellia. "It was real when it happened."

"Tell me," said Jeb, pulling her hands away from her face.

"It was the Mystic Man this time," said Azkedellia. "I loved him when I was a little girl. I was determined that I'd marry him when I grew up. She sucked away his mind, and then she sucked out his soul. To torture me."

"You've had this kind of dream before?" asked Jeb.

"Yes," said Azkedellia. "DG says it's part of my trauma. I - I keep meaning to talk to Raw or a physician about it, but I feel so guilty when so many others need their time more."

"Tomorrow, we'll go and talk to Raw together," said Jeb firmly. "You need help, your highness. You need someone to help you."

"You'll go with me?"

"I get dreams like that too. Of my mother dying. Of failed missions."

"What do you do when you get them?"

"I remind myself of the successes. Of the times things went right. Sometimes I read."

"What do you read?"

"Currently? About plants found in the southern OZ. It's soothing. It's what I was doing when you screamed."

"You had a nightmare too."

"I did."

"I'm sorry for your pain."

"I'm sorry for yours too?"

"Why do you read?"

"I want to keep up with you. You seem to know so much, I only understand half of it."

"I think we know about different things. You know how to survive. I only know book things."

"I think you know more than you think you do about survival, your highness."

"Azkedellia, please."

"Azkedellia. You're a survivor.

Saria placed a tea tray on the table between them. Azkedellia automatically pulled her hands away from Jeb and poured them both a cup of tea, exactly the way they each took it. Jeb sipped the tea gently; it was hot and strong and just the way he liked it. Part of him was surprised that Azkedellia had noticed how he took his tea. Saria retreated to the room she shared with Meimei, leaving Jeb and Azkedellia alone.

"I'm glad the three of you are here," said Azkedellia quietly. "Very glad. I would likely have done myself a serious injury if you had not been present."

"Let's have a good look at your hands," said Jeb, holding his own out for her to take. She placed her hands palm up in his. They were unmarred. Carefully, Jeb looked them over and then looked at the princess.

"There was blood on the mirror shards."

"I must've healed myself," said Azkedellia. "I do not really remember what happened between my dream and sitting in this chair."

"You cut your hair with a shard of mirror," said Jeb. "Meimei and Saria will fix it in the morning so that it's even. Can you go back to sleep?"

"I don't think I will be able to," said Azkedellia. "I will probably read until morning."

"Mind if I join you?" asked Jeb.

"Not at all," said Azkedellia. "I would appreciate the company."

Jeb went to get his book on plants. When he came back, Azkedellia had a thick volume on the Lurlinian period of the OZ's history. He settled back into the chair across from her and opened the book to where he'd left off. They remained engrossed in their books until midmorning, when Meimei and Saria came in to dress Azkedellia for the day.