Quickie:

So guys, here I am. Three months later. I'm still alive! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in so long. I know, I say that every time. But really, I am. A lot of stuff has been going on in my life - I know. I say that too. LOL You've all heard this from me before. But honestly, it's just been way too much stress for me and I haven't been motivated to write the chapters. I'm going to try and pick it back up over the summer, but I won't make any promises because you never know what's going to happen. I know I'm not going to leave the story unfinished though, that's for sure. I have all the ideas implanted in my brain. It's just a matter of when I can get them down, and feel like getting them down. Anyway, enough of my babbling. Accept my apology with a new chapter finally!! Please? No, really. Please?

So I'm not going to even go into replies to reviews. At this point, I don't think you want to bother reading them and just want to know what's happening, right?? Hehe. Enjoy!

Chapter 62

Sawyer turned around, ready to face what the doctor had to say. It was Dr. Park, finally, and her expression was blank – unreadable. He had no idea what to expect. He blinked away his exhaustion, and waited.

"I see you've met Mason," she said with a small smile. "He's a beautiful little boy."

"Yeah…he's little."

"Five pounds, twelve ounces. I'm sure he'll grow just fine."

"Cut to the chase, Doc."

She looked down. "Very well. Why don't we walk and talk?"

"Walk where?" he asked, slowly rising.

"You do want to see her, don't you?"

His heart leapt in his chest as he followed Dr. Park out of the room. He spared one last glance at his sleeping son before the door closed.

"You mean…she's all right?"

"She's stable, if that's what you mean. She's lost a lot of blood," she explained. "So when you see her, don't be too surprised if she's weary. She needs as much rest as possible. We were able to do a transfusion, but she's going to need a few extra days to recuperate."

"But she's all right?"

Dr. Park stopped and turned toward him. "She's alive, James."

He stared at her, long and hard. "Okay."

They started walking again in silence.

"What happened anyway?" he asked. "Why'd she…"

"Go into shock?" He nodded. "The previa was the complication. You remember?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Yeah…I remember."

"It sent her into shock, which caused the hemorrhaging. It also caused Mason to lose quite a bit of blood. He's going to have to stay in the incubator in intensive care for most of the day. We need to make sure his organs will all function properly on their own."

"I thought you just wanted him to live to see today?"

"Better safe than sorry, James." She stopped at the door to Kate's room. "She's going to be very weak. Try not to be frightened by her appearance."

"Why would I – " he started, but stopped at the sight of Dr. Park's stare. "Fine."

"Just hit the call button if you need anything," she said, opening the door.

Sawyer walked in and stood rooted to his spot. The door behind him closed. He stared at Kate from the distance, overwhelmed by what he saw. Kate seemed to be asleep, but she didn't look well. She looked drained of color – so pale that her freckles stood out, even at his distance. There were wires connected to her all over the place. Slowly, he took a few steps toward her. As he did, her eyes opened and she turned her head to face him. A small smile formed.

"Hey," she said in a soft, tired voice.

"Hey yourself," he said, eyeing her. "Gotta say, Freckles. Polka dots just don't suit you."

She laughed. "I never thought so."

He sat in a chair that resided beside the nightstand.

"You look terrible," she smiled up at him.

"Yeah. Well…haven't been sleepin' too well."

She looked away, knowingly.

"So uh…how're you…how're you feelin'?"

"Tired," she said, wondering what had him so nervous.

"Yeah…Doc said you'd be. If…you wanna sleep some, I'll go," he said, rising from the chair. "And you could – "

"No. I want you to stay."

"Oh. All right then," he sat back down.

"James, what's wrong?"

"What?"

"With you. You're acting like…you've seen a ghost or something."

"You have no idea," he muttered.

"What?"

"Nothin'," he said, suddenly feeling a twinge of anger come over him.

She stared at him sadly, but decided not to push the subject.

"Have you seen the baby?"

"Yeah. He's in intensive care."

"He?"

"Yeah." He rubbed his head, trying to fight off the rage. "It's a boy."

She nodded. "Can I…ask you something?"

"Shoot."

"What you said last night…"

Sawyer felt his stomach twist. And he thought he was going to be able to escape that one.

"…Did you mean it?"

"I don't know," he said quietly, looking down.

"It's okay if you didn't. I mean I – "

"I just…I don't know, all right?"

"All right."

"I just said it."

She waited a moment, then spoke. "So…you didn't mean it?"

"Christ, Freckles! Can we just drop this?"

"It's a simple yes or no," she said loudly. Her chest was suddenly starting to hurt, she realized.

"I – DON'T – KNOW!" he shouted.

Her chest began to rise and fall rapidly. Fast, loud beeping filled Sawyer's ears. The heart monitor was going off. He looked at Kate but her eyes had fluttered closed. It was happening again.

Dr. Park entered, two nurses behind her. She checked the machine then Kate's pulse. She looked at Sawyer sternly.

"What did you do?" she asked firmly.

But he was too stunned to speak.

"Get him out," she said.

One of the nurses pulled him out, but he didn't fight back this time. He just stared at Kate, watching her life wane all over again.

The nurse sat him down in a chair outside of the room. It was only a few minutes until Dr. Park came out. She saw him sitting down, staring blankly at the wall, and sat down beside him.

"What happened?" she asked calmly. "James?"

"I yelled at her."

"Why?"

"She…wouldn't…kept…" he drifted.

"James?" She sighed. "Maybe you should go back to Clementine, and let Kate rest a while. When she's got more strength you can see her again, all right?"

He turned his head toward her sharply. "She's okay?!"

"She's fine. Just very weak. Your outburst caused her heart to start beating even more rapidly, and her blood pressure dropped even lower. We have to be very careful with her, James. She's not going to be able to handle your anger."

He looked down, feeling the blame weighing down on him.

"It's okay that you were afraid," she added after a long pause. "Most people go through all kinds of emotional breakdowns when they've nearly lost a loved one."

"I wasn't afraid," he snapped.

"Right." She stood.

"I wanna go back in there," he said, quietly.

"I don't think it's a good idea."

"I don't care what you think, Doc," he snapped.

She folded her arms. He lowered his head in defeat. Dr. Park unfolded her arms and put on a sympathetic expression.

"I know you're worried, but she needs rest."

He didn't respond.

"I'll take you back to Clementine."