Disclaimer: Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank belongs to JK Rowling.

Chapter 12: Grubbly-Plank

The Mirror of Erised

On Wednesday morning, a new Educational Decree was posted announcing multiple staffing changes at Hogwarts. By the time Fudge and his Aurors arrived, it seemed like half the school was under Ministry control. Professor Umbridge had been promoted to Headmistress, of course, pleasing almost no one, and that was bad enough by itself. From that position, Umbridge would pretty much be able to do whatever she wanted.

The position of High Inquisitor was now suspended, although no one doubted that Umbridge would be doing the same job as Headmistress. Professor McGonagall had been left in place for the time being, despite the doubts raised about her ability to do three jobs at once. However, the three vacancies that had opened yesterday for other teachers were all filled with Ministry employees. Arnold Peasegood, an Obliviator, would be teaching Defence; Saul Croaker, an Unspeakable, would be teaching Divination; and to the surprise of many, Percy Weasley was named as "Interim Professor of History of Magic" pending a formal job search. After considering various possibilities, Percy's brothers, and subsequently the rest of the school, concluded that he had been appointed to that position because he was the only person in the Ministry swotty enough to have actually stayed awake in History class.

Tensions were running high at breakfast given the resentment at Umbridge sitting in Dumbledore's seat, bewilderment at all of the other staff changes and, most importantly, the anticipation of most of the school at learning the thrilling conclusion to the adventure of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. In fact, the feeling was more universal that it almost ever was these days as Umbridge and her allies were eagerly awaiting the final coup de grace against Dumbledore and Potter, while her opponents were anticipating her imminent downfall. Even Professor Grubbly-Plank didn't object when she was asked to read the first chapter of the day.

"This should be good," Harry told his friends. "If we're lucky, she'll be gone by lunchtime."

"Chapter Twelve: The Mirror of Erised."

"Bollocks."

"Ooh, sorry, mate," Ron said.

"…The lake froze solid and the Weasley twins were punished for bewitching several snowballs so that they followed Quirrell around, bouncing off the back of his turban."

Harry's, Hermione's, and Ron's jaws hit the floor, and Ron in particular burst out laughing until he couldn't breathe.

"Mr. Weasley! Detention!" Umbridge said imperiously from the High Table. "This is highly disruptive. Just what on Earth do you think is so funny?"

Ron struggled to collect himself. When Umbridge stayed standing, waiting for an answer he choked out, "Sorry, sorry, just a really good prank."

Umbridge harrumphed and sat back down.

"Alright, what's so funny?" Fred whispered.

"Yeah," George agreed. "It was good, but it wasn't that good."

"Shh. You'll find out at the end of the book," Harry told them as he and Hermione looked at them with matching grins worthy of the Twins themselves.

"Ooh, this should be good," Fred said, rubbing his hands together, and George nodded his agreement.

Hermione was going home for the holiday, but Harry and Ron were both staying for their first Christmas at Hogwarts due to their various circumstances, and she wanted them to make productive use of their time and look for information on Nicolas Flamel in the library (much to Hagrid's dismay). They hadn't found anything despite weeks of looking, though. Harry even briefly tried the Restricted Section, but was chased away by Madam Pince.

"It really took you that long to find out about him?" Neville asked.

"He wasn't in any of the modern books," Hermione complained. "It was like he hadn't done any real work since the fifteenth century."

"Wouldn't've been much of a secret to the upper-year students," George said. "I'm surprised Hagrid cared that much."

"Well, he'd already told us too much," Harry said. "He was trying to do damage control, I guess."

Ron suggested that Hermione ask her parents about Flamel, which she dismissed as they were both dentists.

"In retrospect, I probably should have asked," Hermione mused. "Flamel's known in the muggle world. He was before the Statute of Secrecy. We might've saved a few weeks."

Predictably, Harry and Ron didn't actually spend much time in the library over the holidays. Instead, Ron taught Harry chess, which was at least sort of productive, and Harry was excited on Christmas day to actually receive presents.

"Oh, no, you'd never got any Christmas presents before, had you?" Hermione said aghast.

"Not serious ones. They Dursleys always give me a sock or a coat hanger of something."

"That's awful. And they sent you a fifty-pence piece that year? Why would they even bother? That's just spiteful."

"That's the Dursleys," Harry said. "I think it was a joke because I couldn't spend it in the wizarding world."

"Ugh. If I ever see them…" she muttered darkly.

Harry didn't bother dissuading Hermione from whatever horrible revenge she was plotting. It should be amusing, at least. Fortunately, the rest of Harry's presents in the book were better: a hand-carved flute from Hagrid, a jumper and a box of fudge from Mrs. Weasley, Chocolate Frogs from Hermione, and of course his father's Invisibility Cloak with an enigmatic unsigned note that everyone knew was Dumbledore's style.

"An Invisibility Cloak, Mr. Potter?" Umbridge said. "That is completely unacceptable. You will turn it in to me today."

"That cloak is Mr. Potter's property and a priceless family heirloom to boot, Dolores," McGonagall cut in. "You have no right to confiscate it. In fact, you probably don't even have the right to hold his broom like you're doing now."

"Mr. Potter has been banned from Quidditch—"

"And you don't need to take his broom to kick him off the team. And the same goes for Messrs. Weasley, too. Am I right, Auror Shacklebolt?"

Kingsley coughed in annoyance and said, "I don't know the school's bylaws regarding broom ownership, Professor, but the High Inquisitor can't just take student property arbitrarily. If the students in question press the matter, the most she can do is order them sent home.

That would be bad, Harry thought. If Umbridge sent his broom to the Dursleys, they'd probably destroy it. Without hesitation, he stood up and called, "Can I loan my broom to the Weasley Family, Professor?"

"We'll discuss that later, Mr. Potter," McGonagall said smoothly, and with a sharp look at Umbridge, she added, "before Professor Umbridge takes any action. Please sit down."

Harry sat uneasily. His cloak fell under the same concern as his broom, which worried him even more, although they'd have to find it first to confiscate it, and anyway, they were still hoping to see Umbridge's downfall by the end of the day.

The florid description of the Christmas feast at Hogwarts was eye-opening for those who had never stayed at the castle for winter holidays, but it was downright routine compared with Harry's last two Christmases—one being the Yule Ball and the other spent at St. Mungo's. But after a wonderful experience at the midday feast and the subsequent supper of leftovers, he was more interested in the potential uses of his new invisibility cloak in the book. After initially being overwhelmed by the possibilities, he decided to try for the Restricted Section again.

"Tsk-tsk," Fred said. "You get an invisibility cloak, and the first place you go is the library."

"We may have to revoke your troublemaker card," George said.

"You sure you weren't channelling Hermione that night?"

"Hey, it was the Restricted Section," Harry protested.

"True, but how did that go for you?" asked George with a smile.

With a book screaming and Harry fleeing in terror and getting himself lost, as it turned out. Even he had to admit that wasn't a very impressive showing.

"There was a suit of armour near the kitchens, he knew, but he must be five floors above there," Grubbly-Plank read.

Hermione gave Harry a funny look: "Harry, there are hundreds of suits of armour in the castle."

"Plus they move around when you have your back turned," Ron added.

That puzzled Harry, too. Why had he thought a suit of armour would make a good landmark? "I really don't know what I was thinking there," he said.

Meanwhile, in the story, he was nearly caught by Snape and Filch, so he ducked into a nearby classroom where he found…

"It was a magnificent mirror, as high as the ceiling, with an ornate gold frame, standing on two clawed feet. There was an inscription carved around the top…oh, goodness. I don't even know what language this is," Grubbly-Plank said. "Um…Erised stra…ehr-roi…oy-it oob cafru oy-it on woah-zee…?"

"What on Earth?" Professor Babbling said. "Let me see that, Wilhelmina." Grubbly-Plank passed her the book, and she teased out the riddle in moments. "It's backwards," she said. "Mirror writing. It says, 'I show not your face but your hearts desire.'"

That was interesting, the students thought. A few people whispered to each other, wondering what Harry Potter's heart's desire was. You-Know-Who defeated, maybe? Snape gone from the castle? From the reactions he got later from his fellow students afterwards, Harry was surprised at how few had worked it out. In the Hall, he just wanted to sink into the floor. He saw people in the mirror—some very specific people.

"She was a very pretty woman," Grubbly-Plank said haltingly. "She had dark red hair, and her eyes…her eyes are just like mine…No, Professor Umbridge, this is not appropriate. This is an extremely private matter for Mr. Potter, and it should not be announced to the rest of the school without his permission."

"I believe you will find I have the final say on that matter, Professor Grubbly-Plank," Umbridge said stiffly.

"Well, I won't be a part of it!" she snapped. "You're going too far. It's pointless, demeaning, and potentially traumatising to do this to the boy. Find someone else to read it if you're so insistent."

"Very well," Umbridge huffed, and she took out her own copy of the book and found her place to read aloud: "What makes you think she is a witch? Well, she turned me into a newt. A newt? I got better. Burn her anyway—Wait, what? What is this nonsense?"

Fred and George started sniggering.

"Who tampered with my book?!"

"Would you like the complete suspect list, Dolores?" McGonagall asked. "I warn you, it's a bit long." When Umbridge wasn't looking, she flashed the Twins a thumbs-up.

Hermione was biting her knuckles trying to hold back her laughter. "How do you two know Monty Python?" she whispered.

"Dad does know a few things about muggles correctly," said George.

Umbridge ranted a little longer about the "delinquents" who disrupted her reading, but finally, she said, "No matter. I'll be reading next anyway," and she drew her wand. "Accio correct book," she cast, and Professor Grubbly-Plank's copy leapt from her hands despite the woman's protests and flew down the table to Umbridge. She found her place again and picked up the reading: "Her eyes are just like mine, Harry thought, edging a little closer to the glass. Bright green—exactly the same shape, but then he noticed she was crying; smiling, but crying at the same time…"

Despite Fred's and George's little joke a minute ago, the Great Hall was in complete silence. Most people were too moved or too horrified to say anything about Harry's family, and even the Slytherins were smart enough to be respectful about it. Most people weren't quite sure what to make of it. His desire to be with his family already sounded a little unhealthy, Hermione thought—as if she didn't have enough bad vibes about that mirror already, even hearing about it secondhand. Maybe that was how the Mirror got you, she wondered.

However, Harry, being unable to interpret the mirror writing, came to the erroneous conclusion that the Mirror showed one's family. But when he took Ron to see it the next night, Ron saw himself standing alone in it—older—as Head Boy and Quidditch Captain, having won the House Cup and Quidditch Cup, too. That should have made the Mirror's secret obvious in retrospect; Ron had already told Harry his worries about living up to his brothers, but Harry wasn't thinking clearly. But the third night, Hermione was already starting to see red flags of depression in the narration, but luckily, Harry was saved by Dumbledore who told him (in cryptic Dumbledore fashion) the Mirror of Erised's true purpose.

"'However, this mirror will give us neither knowledge or truth. Men have wasted away before it, entranced by what they have seen, or been driven mad, not knowing if what it shows is real or even possible.'" Then, by coincidence, he said, the Mirror would be moved to a new location the very next night, but Harry would be forewarned of its power, just in case. "'It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live…' Well, now," Umbridge commented, "I note that he only said that after he knowingly allowed Potter to gaze into the dangerous magical mirror three nights in a row. And leaving a dangerous magical artifact like that just lying around? It's almost like he wanted Potter to find it, isn't it, Minister?"

"Quite plausible, Dolores," Fudge said. "Definitely suspicious. Might explain a few things about Potter, too. And I wonder where this valuable and dangerous artifact is now. Is it still sitting somewhere in the castle for some other poor student to stumble onto?"

Harry seethed at the implications. The Mirror hadn't messed him up. He was perfectly fine afterwards. And it was a good job he did know about it when he confronted Quirrell. Hermione, however, was lost in thought, her quill poised on her parchment.

"Excellent questions, Minister," Umbridge agreed. "And I'm afraid ones I don't have answers to. I'll have to check the records to see if there's any mention of where the Mirror of Erised is now, but knowing Dumbledore, there might not be. We'll probably have to track him down to be sure."

"Let's keep hoping, then," Fudge said.

Umbridge finished the chapter, to little consequence. Dumbledore claimed that he saw himself in the mirror holding a pair of thick, woollen socks and complained that no one had sent him any for Christmas. It took Harry all the way back to his dorm to realise Dumbledore probably wasn't being truthful, which made his friends roll their eyes. He could be oblivious now and had been much more oblivious at eleven.

One look at Fred and George made it clear Dumbledore would be getting plenty of socks next Christmas.

Still, Hermione's mind was racing. Several concerns presented themselves to her, and one she asked Harry about directly. "Harry," she said, "did you really not know what your parents looked like before that?"

"No, I didn't," he said sadly. "Aunt Petunia didn't keep any pictures of Mum, at least that I could see."

"Awful woman," Hermione muttered to herself. She'd never had siblings herself and couldn't imagine how one could hate another so. "But when you saw your parents in the Mirror, did they look like the photographs?" she asked further.

"Yeah, they did. Why?"

"Well, technically, the Mirror did give you knowledge, then," she said. "It showed you what your parents looked like when you didn't remember yourself. And even if you remembered them from when you were a baby, the grandparents, great-grandparents, and cousins it showed you you probably didn't. I think Sirius mentioned once your grandparents died before you were born."

"Huh," was all Harry had to say.

After some thought, Hermione decided that issue wasn't all that important, although she made a note for later. The other questions, however, including Fudge's, were concerning. Why was the Mirror there and not guarding the Philosopher's Stone? Why did Dumbledore let Harry watch it for so long? And also, there was Dumbledore's odd phrasing when he said it would be moved: If you ever do run across it, you will now be prepared. But Dumbledore knew it was going to the forbidden corridor. Was he expecting Harry to stumble upon it again? It didn't make sense, but she didn't like where this line of thought was going.

1. Why was the Mirror of Erised (probably the most important of the P.S.'s defences) either temporarily moved out of the forbidden corridor or not installed until halfway through the year?

2. Is the timing of Dumbledore giving Harry his invisibility cloak at nearly the same time the Mirror was moved significant?

3. Why did Dumbledore knowingly allow Harry to be exposed to a dangerous and mind-altering magical artifact for so long?

4. Was Dumbledore expecting Harry to find the Mirror again (or even think it likely)?

5. Is the Mirror in a safer place now?