Thanksgiving was around the corner and Beca had a lot to be thankful for this year: the human being that was growing inside her, that she will hopefully get to meet in a few months, was definitely the one thing she was super grateful for. He wasn't planned but she really wanted him from day one. Of course, she had a mild panic attack when she found out about him because she wasn't sure she could be a decent parent. Admittedly, she had thought about having a child of her own and tried to talk about it with Jesse a few times but he didn't get the hint so she dropped it. But when she saw the two lines on the stick, reality hit her and it was pretty damn frightening.

The fear of failure was still there: She wasn't a 100% ready to have a child: But she was going to do everything in her power to be an okay parent and hopefully raise her son to be a decent functioning member of society.

He just had to be born first.

Beca took a deep breath and exhaled as she thought about her baby boy who she really wanted to arrive in this world when he's supposed to and not prematurely as her doctor feared after he diagnosed her with Preeclampsia.

She took the morning off to go see the doctor and when she got in her car and began to drive to work she had a really bad anxiety attack and so she took it as a sign to just call in sick and play hooky for the day. She made a call and somehow managed to drive to Central Park where she found an empty bench and sat on it.

She grabbed her phone, planning to call Jesse. He should know. She should have called him sooner. She should have called him when she felt the anxiety attack building up. Yet, she didn't. She decided to deal on her own.

Tapping on the logs icon, she kept eyeing the screen. She knew he had to know that she was sick and probably wouldn't be able to keep their son in the womb until he's fully developed because she developed the shit called preeclampsia really early in the pregnancy which made controlling the symptoms until she's due a little hard. Yet she didn't want to tell him. He had finally warmed up the fact that she was going to live on her own and her health issues would really mess that up.

Instead of calling him she tapped on another contact.

She cleared her throat as the phone rang.

"Beca? Honey, is everything okay?" her dad's worried voice came through the phone.

"Yeah." She paused. "I'm just calling to see how you're doing," she said with a shrug.

"I'm doing well," he answered a hint of worry in his voice still.

"What about Sheila? She alright?" she asked.

"Yeah, she's well too."

Beca glanced up and noticed the way clouds were gathering. She knew it was a matter of time before it started to rain.

"Hey, dad," she started to say.

"Uh-huh?"

"Do we have any health problems that run in the family?" she asked.

When Beca asked her doctor if she had done anything wrong that could have caused her to develop preeclampsia he told her that it was unlikely her fault and that developing it early in her pregnancy might be due to a genetic reason.

"No, nothing really stands out," he said after a beat.

"What about mom's side of the family, dad?" She really didn't want to ask her mother because she really couldn't deal with her.

"Beca, is there something you'd like to tell me?" he asked her.

Beca glanced up feeling a raindrop fall on her forehead. "No," she sighed and got up and started making her way back to her car. "I was just wondering. To clear things up and run tests and stuff, you know?"

"Uh-huh." Beca clenched her jaw at how unconvinced her father sounded. "Well, I don't think there's anything on your mother's side either. But you should ask her to be sure."

She wasn't going to call her mother. Knowing if it's in her genes or not wouldn't change anything. She was sick and that was it. She couldn't change it. She could take meds and do what her doctor tells her to do and hope for the best. She was just curious.

"Dad, what are your plans for the holidays?" Beca asked as she unlocked her car and got in, changing the topic. "Finally going on a cruise ship or what? That's like a must-do in every retired person's life."

She smiled hearing him let out a small laugh.

"Sheila is working over the holidays I can't go on a cruise ship without her," he told her. "She's going to be in New York actually. Her work engagement is between the 23rd and the 24th but she couldn't find any flights back home on the 24th. She's gonna be stuck there over the holidays."

"Oh," Beca started the car to get the heating going before she leaned against her seat. "You should come over, too," she said as she rubbed her temple thinking. "We could like have thanksgiving dinner."

"Bec, I know how you feel about last minute plans," he knowingly said, declining her invitation without even saying it.

True, she wasn't a fan of this sort of plans but she did want to see him. She actually missed him and kind of wished she'd sack up and ask for advice from her old man like she originally intended when she decided to call him but that wasn't happening so she figured seeing him in person might help.

"Just come, okay?" she said and shook her head for her inability to form a better sentence to say. She was never good at saying sentimental stuff to her dad.

"Okay," he said after a long beat.

Thanksgiving Day.

Beca was unloading grocery she bought with her mother and step-mother for dinner when Jesse peeked his head through the doorway.

(After telling Jesse that she invited her dad and his wife over for thanksgiving he asked about her mother and told her how uncool it would be not to invite her as well. Seeing that he had a point, Beca picked up the phone and called her.)

"Hey," he smiled at her then stepped inside the kitchen.

"Hi." She glanced up for a second.

"Where's everyone?" he asked.

"They're at the Macy's parade," she told him as she pulled the fridge door.

"Why didn't you go with them?" he wondered in confusion.

"Um, I have a headache and it's windy outside." She shrugged. "And I will end up complaining about my back and feet and suck the fun out of it," she sighed. "We just went out to grocery down the bloc and my feet already hurt."

He nodded and rested his elbow on the fridge's door while she stacked grocery in it.

Beca looked at him when he held a card her way. She took it from him and flipped it around. She smiled noting that he made it himself. It wasn't anything fancy. Just a folded paper that he drew something that's supposed to be a turkey. ( She wouldn't have guessed if it weren't for the arrow that was pointing to it with turkey written next to it.)

Next to the 'turkey' he wrote 'Happy Thanksgiving.'

She opened it and read the note: 'There are a lot of things I'd like to thank you for but I don't think I could fit it all here. So, Thank you for Joseph and for being in my life. Love, your best friend.'

Beca kept eyeing the card then sniffed and blew a breath before looking up. Jesse pushed the fridge door close and reached for Beca pulling her into a hug. He thought her tears were just her hormones heightening her feelings: she was actually pushing back tears because she thought about their baby and how scared she was for him.

Yeah, she didn't tell him she was sick. She didn't want him to worry. It wasn't the right call and she definitely needed his support yet she couldn't bring herself to tell him.

When she started silently crying in his arms, Jesse began to worry. He rubbed her back and held her closer to him the moment she started shaking. She had been bottling up her emotions and building up walls to protect herself: She knew that she if she lost control and cried odds were she'd end up sobbing.

Screw Jesse for causing her to lose her grip with his thoughtful gestures!

She cleared her throat once her sobs got to an end. "You suck at drawing," she said.

"Well, I tried." He shrugged loosening his hold to let her pull away.

Jesse watched her wipe her cheeks and look down at the card.

"I love it, Jess, thanks."

She leaned up and placed a peck on his cheek. She tried to smile but he could see right through her. "I believe a spectacular foot rub is in order," he said, figuring a massage could put her in a good mood.

"Jesse, I have to finish unpacking and start on dinner." She put the card on the counter.

"It's not even 9:00 am yet," he said then clapped his hands. "C'mon," he nodded at the door.

Sh sighed and walked past him. She could use a foot rub.

She definitely needed a foot rub. Jesse's hands did magic.

"I'll take care of grocery," Jesse said watching Beca sit up. "You look like you could use a nap too." He got up. He was glad his massage did make her feel slightly better.

"What?" he frowned noting the way she was about to say something then changed her mind.

"Nothing," she shook her head.

"What is it, Bec?" he sat down on the couch.

"It's just my head hurts and I'm not supposed to take painkillers 'cause they're not good for Joseph, you know?"

He nodded.

"I don't think I could fall asleep on my own." She shrugged. There was one thing that could help out but she felt it would be weird to ask if they could cuddle.

"We could cuddle," he suggested instantly, knowing that the sense of safety he gave her when he'd hold her helped her fall asleep.

"No, it's fine. It'll go away," she shook her head despite the fact that she really wanted to cuddle.

"Not without drugs," he told her as he kicked off his sneakers. Beca gave in, getting up to let him lay on the couch then laying back on it after he did. She leaned into him and felt him wrap her in his arms and rested his cheek against her head. It felt great. She chuckled when he started singing Flightless Bird, American Mouth by Iron and Wine in a really low voice to help her fall asleep faster.

"Some Bon Iver next please," she requested. He nodded.

She closed her eyes and it wasn't long until she dozed off.

Some time later,

Beca shifted waking up when she felt Jesse cup her breast. Under different circumstances, she would have found it funny that he was grabbing her boob in his sleep. She tilted her head to look at him after she gently removed his hand. He rested it on her belly.

She reached for his face and ran her fingers over his cheek and pulled her hand away when he shifted then sighed waking up. He rubbed his eyes before he looked at her.

"How's that headache?" he asked.

"Gone," she told him.

"Good," he smiled lazily at her. "That's good." He rubbed his hand against her belly.

"Glad cuddling still does it," he said and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Tell me you felt that?" she asked, feeling their baby kick. He grinned and nodded.

"He's probably telling us to cuddle more often," he told her and watched her shift in a way she was facing him.

"Sure," she snorted then rested her head in the crook of his neck. He could tell that she wasn't fully awake and wanted to go back to sleep so he pulled her to him and rubbed her back, loving the lack of distance between them while also hating the reason behind it. (whenever she would be dealing with something she'd seek physical comfort, which he had no problem providing.) He knew something was up, the way she sobbed when he gave her the thanksgiving card told him much. He was planning on getting to the bottom of it.

He could hear her sigh after she threw her arm around him and began to scratch the back of his neck. "You okay, Bec?" he asked then pulled his head back when she stopped scratching the back of his neck.

Beca shrugged meeting his gaze. "What is it, Bec?" he frowned, noting the conflicted look in her eyes. He put his hand on the small of her back.

"Did I do something?" he doubtfully asked, feeling her play with his t-shirt to avoid looking at him. She shook her head and clenched the fabric in her hand before she looked up.

Jesse looked down at her hand then back at her before he leaned in for a kiss then stopped when she removed her hand and quickly got up. He was quick on his feet as well to hold her seeing that she held her head and almost fell back on the couch. "Whoa, you okay there, Bec?" he wondered, helping her take a seat.

"Yeah, I just stood up really fast. Forgot that makes me dizzy now," she chuckled humorlessly as she removed her hand.

"Sorry, I thought you wanted—" he cleared his throat.

(Clenching his shirt was a gesture they agreed on whenever she wanted sex because she didn't want actually say she wanted to have sex with him.)

"It's fine." She squeezed his hand.

"And, that's probably your parents," Jesse said hearing the doorbell.

Later that day,

Beca was stuffing her mouth with Greek salad when her step-mother asked, "Where's the nursery, Beca?"

She finished chewing to give herself time to think. "We haven't bought a crib or anything yet," she said after swallowing. "Been pulling it off until I close in on this new place I'm buying."

"You are buying a house?" her mom arched an eyebrow looking between her and Jesse.

"Yeah, maa. I am buying a penthouse to be exact." She took a forkful of salad and brought it to her mouth.

"I can't afford a penthouse," Jesse said when Nicole looked away from her daughter and met his gaze. He wasn't lying. He couldn't. Besides, he had a kid and another one on the way, he was low-key freaking out on how he was going to save up enough money to get them to college so spending money on buying fancy homes wasn't an option.

Beca was doing so well in her career and wasn't spending her money willy-nilly. Jesse actually made fun of her for it and called her cheap because she was leading a very modest life for someone of her status in the music industry.

"Or even a one bedroom apartment for that matter," Jesse added when Nicole wouldn't break eye contact. He had known for years and she still intimidated him. He swallowed. "I mean I could but that would leave me bankcrupt—"

"Jess, have some mashed potatoes," Beca interrupted, placing the plate she initially made for herself in front of Jesse, knowing he was going to start stress-rambling. (her mother really scared him.) He nodded and dipped the spoon in the mashed potatoes.

"Beca," Dr. Mitchell called. Beca glanced at him as she put more salad on her plate. "Did you find out if there are health issues that run in your mom's side of the family?" he wondered.

"No," Beca sighed. "Do we have anything I should look into, mom,?" Beca asked her mother as she looked up to meet her gaze. Beca noticed the way her mother took a second before shaking her head and wondered if there was something indeed.

"Why?" Nicole asked.

"No particular reason." Beca shrugged.

"Bec, you haven't touched anything but salad," Jesse noted.

Salad was the least salty thing on the table and Beca was trying to watch her diet.

"Just finishing up on appetizers before I get into the main course," she said.

She watched Jesse pull a leg from the turkey and place on her plate then smiled at him when he looked at her.

10:11 pm.

Jesse was laying on his back on what used to be his shared bed with Beca. Dr. Mitchell and Sheila were staying at a hotel and Nicole was staying at their place.

Because last minute plans, that's why.

He followed Beca with his eyes as she moved around the room, grabbing nighties and walking into the en-suite bathroom to change. He watched her lock the door behind her and looked up at the ceiling when she unlocked it later.

He was doing great. Awesome. Wonderful. He totally didn't feel like he was going to explode. He could spend the night in the same room, same bed, and keep his thoughts and hands to himself.

Jesse sighed a sigh of relief and a little disappointment when he saw that Beca was going to bed in sweatpants and a t-shirt, nothing to ignite the perverted thoughts in his head. He had a lot of alone time: he let his imagination take him places. What? He had needs and got creative when satisfying those needs since he couldn't exactly do anything with his pregnant not-girlfriend.

"Jesse, just because I'm unable to stay up after ten-thirty doesn't mean you have to sleep early too," Beca said as she climbed on the bed.

"I know," he glanced at her and folded his hands together. "I'm fine calling it an early night."

"Suit yourself," she mumbled, laying on her side, facing him, and closing her eyes.

"Hey, Bec?" Jesse called less than a minute later.

"mmhm?" she hummed in response.

"You were in the kitchen with your mom for quite some time when you went to check on dessert." He paused. "D'you guys talk about anything I should know of?"

"No, we didn't talk about the penthouse," she answered. "She did ask if we're planning on circumcising Joseph," Beca yawned. "Guess, that's something you should know about," she added.

"And?" he tilted his head when she went quiet.

"Told her we're still talkin' about it." Beca tried to keep her expression neutral as she spoke.

"No, there's no talkin'," he shook his head. "I'm Jewish therefore he is and he has to be circumcised."

"Please, I don't remember ever seeing you eat kosher. I'm pretty sure you don't know when Hanukkah falls this year. And, correct me if I'm wrong but isn't Jewishness passed down through the mother?" She already knew the answer, it was a big fat yes. "Technically speaking, Joseph won't be born a Jew."

"Judaism," Jesse corrected and Beca opened her eyes to look at him.

"Huh?"

"You said Jewishness, it's Judaism," he said as he scratched his stubble, frowning.

"My bad," she sarcastically said.

He nodded then cleared his throat.

"Relax, Jesse, I'm messing with you," she chuckled at the really thoughtful look on his face. "God, you Jews," she sighed.

"It's not just that." He paused, turning on his side to face her. "It's more of an identity thing, Bec."

"I get it," she nodded.

"No, not the Jewishness. It's more of an at-least-he'll-have-something-of-me. For all, I know, he could turn out to look more like you," he shrugged. "It's silly, I know."

"I get it, Jesse," she smiled at him, repeating herself. "And, it's not silly." She paused. "A little weird that from all the stuff you could have picked about your identity as Jew you chose the one about the dick but definitely not silly," she added.

Jesse grinned at her, "good night, Bec."

"Night," she said and closed her eyes.

Jesse watched her for a few seconds then turned off the table lamp.

Jesse glanced at the time and sighed seeing that it was 11:43 pm. It was safe to say that he wasn't going to fall asleep.

He tried counting sheep, a yoga method that consists of breathing through the left nostril, rewind his day, even tried to hum himself to sleep. As a last resort, he decided to listen to some calming music.

It wasn't working either but Iron and wine made really great music.

Jesse removed an earbud and sighed seeing that it was 12:30 am. He was running a hand over his face when he heard a moan coming from Beca. He reached for the table lamp and turned it on to get a better look at Beca when the moan got followed by another one.

She was asleep. Tight asleep.

He rested his weight on his elbow and arched an eyebrow. "Bec," he called in a low voice as he shook her gently. She moaned again in her sleep. He sat up and dumbfoundedly watched her as she chased, what he couldn't believe was an orgasm, a sleep orgasm.

He couldn't say a word when she woke up right after hitting the edge. He couldn't even move. He didn't want to move. He wanted her. Pretty bad.

Jesse was stuttering, as she sat up while trying to control her breathing, then snapped out of it when she wrapped her arms around herself in pain. "Are you okay? Oh my God, Beca, are you okay?" he asked.

She nodded. "Just cramps. They'll pass," she told him. Despite his very unfocused state of mind, he could tell from her tone that what just happened to her wasn't a first.

"arr, d-do I get you anything?" he asked, slightly shaking his head, begging himself to get his shit together. Self-control, c'mon, we can do this.— Jesse thought to himself as he tried to push his erotic thoughts away.

She shook her head as she bit her low lip in pain. Just a few more seconds— Beca told herself, reminding herself that cramps never lasted long. They hurt like a fucking bitch but never lasted longer than a couple of minutes.

Self-fucking-control—Jesse mentally yelled at himself as he watched her bite her lip.

Beca leaned against the headboard and sighed when the cramps came to an end. She could feel Jesse's gaze on her as he waited for some elaboration on what had unfolded in front of him.

"How often does it happen?" Jesse hesitantly asked when she didn't say anything.

"I'm not keeping track," she sighed rubbing her face with her left hand.

"What triggers it?" he asked, not knowing how to put it. He knew she was sexually frustrated. He wasn't jacked up on hormones like she was and was barely keeping it together without sex, he knew it worse for her.

"Sometimes it's random," she said. There were a lot of reasons, she had enough sleep orgasms to kind of figure out what caused them, it was things like seeing him half naked, or when he'd come home sweating like a pig after a run. Her guess for this time: sleeping in his arms and almost kissing him.

Jesse nodded and did the exact opposite of what he should have done by soouting closer to her. He found himself tucking her hair behind her ear. She looked up.

"Random, huh?" he mumbled staring at her lips.

She held her breath when he leaned in and couldn't pull her head back so she let him kiss her. He kissed her fully expecting her to be the rational one and pull away because he couldn't—didn't want to be rational. He wanted her.

"We shouldn't," she mumbled, kissing him back.

"Mhmm." He hovered on top of her, still kissing her intensely. She was tugging up his t-shirt impatiently so he pulled away to get rid of it.

Beca rested her hands on his torso, catching her breath, running her hands, then pulled him down to her by his shoulders.

He went for her neck, (He wasn't thinking right but no way he was going to let it be a quickie and with the impatient way she was kissing him he knew he had to hit the brakes and take it slow. ), and he heard a small giggle from Beca when he began to place kisses. She reached for his hand and put it on her belly. "You have no idea how funny this feels," she told him as he moved his hand around, feeling their baby show off his karate chops.

Jesse grinned looking up to meet her gaze. He didn't know he could be more attracted to her. He wasn't sure it was possible to lust after her this badly. In a quick move, he helped her take off her t-shirt.

It was 1:45 am when Jesse glanced at the clock, he looked back at Beca and smiled hearing a happy sigh from her as she rested her head against his chest.

"We can't do this again," she mumbled sleepily.

He ran his fingers through his hair, feeling like a kid whose parents told him to not have any more cookies, devastated, sad, annoyed because he wanted more of her. Her body had been going through changes and he hadn't had enough of exploring her— he doubted he'd ever have enough. He squeezed her arm, reassuringly and nodded, "Okay." He pressed her against him and heard her hiss so he loosened his hold instantly.

"My boobs hurt," she weakly pushed him away from her. He chuckled despite feeling bad for her, it was partially his fault.

"Wanna spoon instead?" he asked, forcing the grin off his face when she glared at him.

"No, this is good." She paused, pushing herself up so that she could rest her head in the crook of his neck. "Just don't move, okay?" she said into his neck as she got in a comfortable position.

"Mhmm," he hummed back.

Jesse took a lock of her hair between his fingers and began playing it while she dozed off. He sniffed after yawning then sighed as he began to fall asleep as well.

"Jesse," Beca groaned in annoyance, "Jesse, turn it off," she mumbled.

Jesse frowned feeling Beca weakly pulling his hair as she demanded, "turn it off!"

He opened one eye, and clumsily reached for his ringing phone and grabbed it from the night stand—he wasn't sure what possessed him to make 30 Seconds To Mars' Kings and Queens is his ringtone. Right, because it's a dope-ass song!— He was about to hang up on whoever was calling him at 2:14 am, he looked at the caller ID and frowned seeing that it was Christina.

Knowing she might be in trouble because of her drinking problem, he decided to pick up, "Hello?" he throatily said.

"Chimichanga?" Christina said.

"Yeah?"

There was a beat before she chuckled.

"What's that song that goes like 'to the left to the left everything you own in a box to the left'?" she slurred.

Jesse sighed before answering, "Irreplaceable by Beyoncé."

"Right." She paused. "Is there a song you don't know, Chimichanga?" she asked.

"Everyone knows Irreplaceable," he replied, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. "What's up? It's pretty late."

"Right." She cleared her throat. "So, I think in the Garden State," she slurred doing her best New Jersey accent.

"Wait, what?" He ran his fingers through his hair. "You think? So, do don't know where you are exactly?" he asked and watched Beca place a finger on his lips too lazy to tell him to lower his voice.

"I left with a dude," she hiccuped. "His place stunk so I got out when he went to the bathroom," she told him. "I thought I was calling someone else, sorry, go back to sleep."

"No, wait," he said louder than he intended and heard Beca mumble his name in annoyance. "Who were you trying to call?" he asked in a low voice. In the time he had known her, she never mentioned any close friend.

"Nobody," she laughed, "they should disconnect the number." He heard her say and figured she was thinking out loud.

"Go on Google Maps, you have the app right?"

"Uh-huh."

"Good. Now, go on Google Maps and find out your location then text it to me, okay?" he told her. "You think you could do that?"

"Yeah, I got it," she said.

"Do not move until I come and get you."

Jesse ran his hand over his face after hanging up. He looked down at Beca and placed a kiss on her hair.

"Wear a beanie and wrap a scarf around your neck, it's pretty cold out," Beca said pulling her head back. "Take some sweater for her from my closet in case she needs it," she added distancing herself from him and holding on to the duvet that wasn't as comfy or warm as Jesse.

Her thoughtfulness made him crack a smile. He leaned down and placed a kiss on her shoulder before climbing off the bed and collecting his clothes to wear.

AN: Thank you for reading. A review to know what you thought of this would be great. I know it might seem pretty complicated but I promise you that it'll get less complicated in future chapters. I can't promise you when because I'm super busy.