EPOV again. =)
Hope you guys like it!!

The song for this chapter is the ACOUSTIC version of "Everlong" by Foo Fighters.

- JayBee

EPOV

After about a minute, Bella turned back around, taking the lollipop out of her mouth and looking at me, oblivious to what was going through my mind.

"Edward, what?" I don't know if she was asking me why I was staring, or still waiting for me to say something because I had called her name out.

I didn't say anything. I just fell onto my back on the bed, and looked at the ceiling. What was I supposed to say? 'Your legs look so nice, Bella. You have no pants on.
I was wondering if you were wearing any underwear.' Yeah, because that wouldn't be creepy.

I heard her throw the lollipop away and get up. I prayed that she wouldn't sit next to me. I don't think I could take it right now.

I had seen her legs countless times before, and I'd even seen her in just a t-shirt, but I didn't think of her this way back then. I wish more than anything that I could still
deny my feelings, but I'd already accepted them.

I let out a sigh of relief when she sat on my bed, facing me.

"Edward?"

I turned my head to speak to her and quickly brought it back to its previous position when I realized I was face-to-face with her…bare legs.

"Edward, what the heck are you doing? Why aren't you talking?"

Because I'm trying not to stare at your legs like the idiot that I am. "Sorry. What were you saying?" I turned my head again, making sure to keep my eyes on her face
and look nowhere else.

She brought the front layers of her hair in front of her face and started playing with them. "Why did you sound panicked before?"

"Hmm? When?"

She ran her hands through her hair, pushing her hair back. "Just before. When you called out my name."

"Oh…I didn't know where you were when I didn't see you in my bed."

She laughed. "I was right here. Where would I be?"

"Dunno. Just got worried."

"About what? I'm in your room. Nothing can happen."

"I don't…really know, actually. I don't know why I got worried. I freaked out because I fell asleep, and I wasn't supposed to." I sat up and faced her.

She seemed so clueless and confused. "Oh. So…why weren't you supposed to?"

"Huh? Don't you remember anything from last night?"

She looked away and shook her leg. I kept looking at her leg, and when she stopped shaking it and looked back at me, I snapped my head up to her. "Yeah, I do...
Okay, I'll tell you, but don't get mad."

What was she talking about? Of course I was mad. Didn't she see that last night? Alright, I kept looking down at her legs. I couldn't have a conversation like this. "Tell me after
you answer this: Why aren't you wearing any pants?"

"I don't know. I woke up and there was…vomit…on them, so I took 'em off. I tried on one of your shorts, but they kept falling off. Okay, let me ask this: Why am I in your shirt?"

I stood up and held up a finger. "One sec." I left and went into Alice's room. She was still sleeping, so I grabbed a pair of sweatpants from her closet. She probably wouldn't
get mad because they were for Bella, so I didn't bother waking her up and asking her.

I got back to my room and threw them at Bella. "Here." They hit her head and landed on my bed.

Her hand immediately went to her head. "Ow! Edward! What the hell?"

I had to laugh. "Bella, come on. They're sweatpants. I doubt that hurt."

She got up to put them on, and I went over to my closet to get a pair of sweatpants for myself, throwing them on as well. I didn't bother putting on a shirt.

Bella sat back down and I took my previous seat across from her.

"Okay. Now, why am I wearing your shirt?"

"You said you remembered what happened last night."

She looked down. "Oh…yeah…I do. Okay, Edward, please don't get mad." I didn't answer and she looked back up at me. "Okay?"

I didn't answer her. I couldn't promise that I wouldn't get mad, because I was beyond pissed last night. "What do you remember?"

She started rambling. "I feel so bad, Edward. So bad for not telling you, but I knew you'd get mad. …I went on a date with Jake yesterday. But he's not as bad as you think he is!
And he's a Rangers fan! Doesn't that earn him points with you?" She ended with a smile, and she jumped when I spoke.

I threw my hands into the air. I felt my blood boiling. "Earn him points?! Bella, what the hell?! Who cares if he's a Rangers fan?!" I grabbed my hair with both hands and had to
take a deep breath. What the fuck was she saying? I let go of my hair slowly and breathed in and out deeply. I tried to keep my voice calm. "Bells…what else do you remember?"

"You're not mad that I went out with him and didn't tell you? I mean, I was gonna tell you when I got back –"

"No – I mean, yeah, that does kind of piss me off, but I don't care right now. What else do you remember? Anything while you guys were talking?" I wondered if she knew what
happened before I got there.

She looked up, trying to remember. "Um…not really. We were talking and drinking…and then…I don't know. I woke up in your bed. Why was I in your bed and not in the one you're
sitting on? I thought you liked to only sleep in your bed."

"I put you in that one because you feel more comfortable in it."

"You put me in it?"

"Do you remember how you got here?"

"No. I don't remember anything after drinking. I made it here safely though." She smiled and nodded her head. "I guess I had a pretty good night!"

I put my hands over my face and fell backward onto the bed. "Oh…my…fucking…GOD! Shit, Bella!"

"What? Why are you being so weird? And…why am I wearing your shirt?"

I felt my anger rising and sat back up. "It really doesn't matter why you're wearing it. You wanna know? You really wanna know why you're wearing my shirt? Because I changed
your shirt last night. Because you threw up and got some on it."

I was furious. Furious. I felt my face getting hot. My anger was taking over the sorrow I had felt for her before. "Oh, and why did you throw up? Because you passed the fuck out
at the bar, and I don't know, I guess you had alcohol poisoning. I don't know how you don't know your fucking limit. You're 22! You're fine when we hang out and drink! What the
fuck happened?! And the fucking retard didn't even think to stop you?! You think you can't remember anything because you got sooo fucked up and had an amazing time?!!"

I stood up and pointed a finger at her. "No. You can't remember anything because you passed out, he brought you up to his apartment, left you there – fucking left you there – and
went back down to the bar to hang out with people. Oh, but don't worry. He's not as bad as I think he is, right? He can't even fucking take care of you…"

I thought she might cry, but to my surprise, she stood up aggressively, and I fought back the urge to push her back down onto my bed and make her sit.

"I don't need anyone to take care of me!"

"Well, apparently you do, Bella!! Holy fuck! I wish you could've seen yourself last night! You could barely walk! I wouldn't be surprised if your beloved Jacob got you that drunk on purpose."

She took a few seconds to answer. "Okay, first, he's not my 'beloved' anything. He's a freaking friend –"

"Some friend…"

"Shut up! He is a friend! At least he doesn't put me down… That's all you're doing right now! You're making me feel like crap! And how did you even find me? Weren't you out with Jasper?"

I put my hand up. I didn't think it was possible to get any angrier until she said that, and I struggled to keep my voice calm. "Wait a second. So he's a friend, but I'm not? Please,
Bella, tell me that's not what you're saying right now."

She bit the corner of her bottom lip and looked away. "I don't know…"

I really didn't know if I should be sad or mad. "What do you mean you don't know? Bella, he just left you there. You passed out and he just…left you. What if I hadn't come? You weren't
even on your side when I got there. What if you threw up and just choked? He wouldn't have been there to save you."

I sat down slowly and held her gaze, shrugging my shoulders. "Then what would I have done? What would I do without you? Seriously, Bella. What would I do? Tell me."

I didn't want to think about her not making it, but I couldn't help it. I looked down in my lap, feeling defeated. I didn't know what had defeated me, but I couldn't shake off the feeling
of being overpowered somehow.

She took two steps toward me and grabbed my face from both sides, pulling my head up and forcing me to look at her. Her voice was low. "Don't say that. Please."

I pulled her hands down. "Well, what do you want me to say? Bella, why are you so naïve? You think everyone is such a good person."

She took a couple of steps back and sat on the bed across from me. "There's good in everyone, Edward."

"But sometimes the bad outweighs the good. Bella, I really can't stand Jacob. No, you know what? Forget about not being able to stand him. Honestly, I hate the kid. I still can't believe
he didn't make you stop drinking and then he didn't even…ARGH!" I slammed my fist against the bed. "I just can't stand him, okay?"

"Okay, Edward, I understand. I won't hang out with him so much anymore."

Was she joking? "Huh? So much? Bella, you're not talking to him again."

She took a second to answer. "What do you mean I'm not talking to him?"

"You're. Not. Talking. To him. Again." I don't think I could make it any clearer.

"Yeah, actually, I am. Do I tell you who to talk to and who not to talk to? No. I don't."

"You're right. You don't. Because I don't think everyone's such a goody-goody. If I have a bad feeling about someone, I stay away."

She nodded her head. "Sure, sure…that's why you stayed away from Ashley."

That caught me completely off guard. "Bella, what the fuck does that have to do with this? Why are you bringing up old shit? And she's not even a bad person."

She mumbled her response, and I don't think I was supposed to hear it. …But I did, and it got my blood boiling again. "Yeah, she's not a bad person because she fucked your brains out."

I shoved myself off the bed and spoke through clenched teeth. "Bella, I swear to God…"

She didn't seem upset at all, and that bugged me even more. How could she not be upset right now? Did she not care at all? "What? You swear what? It's true. She did fuck your brains
out. Or maybe you fucked hers out. Who knows?" She shrugged her shoulders.

I couldn't believe she was saying things like this. I didn't want to hear her speak about Ashley and me having sex. I didn't want her to think about it, because I knew it made her mad.
I swear, Bella was the only person who was able to get me from sad to mad and back again so quickly.

I got on my knees in front of her and looked up at her as I put my hands on her knees, pleading with my eyes. "Bells, please. Please stop. Why are you bringing this up now? I thought
we were past this. I don't wanna think about it. I know it hurt you, and I stopped talking to her. For – for you. I don't know what else you want me to do! Say it, and I'll do it. All you have
to do is tell me. I promise. Just stop talking about it. …Please."

I felt defeat wash over me again.

Her eyes were bloodshot and I realized that tears were slowly running own her cheeks.

Her hand came up to my face and I didn't even know I was crying until her thumb wiped away the single tear rolling down my cheek. After she took her thumb away, I wiped my cheek
with my hand.

She was so beautiful. Even when she cried and was at her lowest point, she looked more beautiful than other girls did on their best days. She beat them all by a thousand miles, and
she didn't even know it. She didn't even have to try. She was naturally beautiful, inside and out. From her gorgeous hair, to her lovely brown eyes, to her stunning face, to her genuine
personality. Everything about her. Absolutely everything. I couldn't find one flaw. Even the things she did that annoyed me, and even when she pissed me off to my breaking point; I loved it all.

I don't think she would ever understand how much it bothered me when she brought up what I'd done with Ashley. I wish I could go back and undo it. It wasn't worth this. Ashley was
worthless to me, especially compared to my baby.

I knew I was the one to make her cry like this, and it broke my heart. I brought my hands to her face to wipe her tears and she reached for my hands to take them in her own.

My voice was lower than a whisper when I spoke. "Baby, why are you crying?"

She started sniffling. "I – I – I don't know. Why are you?"

I didn't answer. I just hugged her waist and when she fell back on the bed, I brought myself up higher and rested my head on her stomach as she wove her hands through my hair.

My head rose and fell with each breath she took.

We lay that way for a few minutes, but I knew we still had thigns to settle.

"Bella, please don't think you're second to Ashley…or to anyone. I don't know how to make you see that you're number one, always. You're always on top. If there's any way for me to
make you see it, tell me, please. No one comes before you, ever. When I asked you to tell me what I would do without you before, I really wanted you to tell me. I truly don't know what
I'd do if you were ever taken away from me. I love you so much, Bella. So. Much."

This was the most I could say without letting her know I was in love, and even though it killed me to hold my feelings back, I couldn't just drop them on her at a moment like this.

It was quiet for a minute, until I heard her crying again. She took her hands out of my hair and I rested my chin on her stomach to look up at her. "Can you please tell me why you're crying?
I wanna know." She looked down at me and her face was twisted in grief. I couldn't look, so I put my head back down.

"B – Because I made you think Jake came before you! And on top of that, I said he was a friend but you weren't! How can you feel bad for me? What I said to you was much worse than what
you did…"

Her hands went back into my hair and I closed my eyes, losing myself in the feeling of her hands.

"I know I'm your number one, but you have to know you're mine too, Edward. You can't doubt that. Even when I say dumb things. I have no problem with not speaking to Jake. If you don't
want me to, I won't. I trust you. I know what he did was wrong…And I should've been more careful…You're right. I am naïve. But I always have you here. I know that. I know you're here.
So I don't worry about speaking to anyone who would put me in danger. I know you wouldn't let anything happen…"

I opened my eyes, and even though no tears fell, my eyelashes were wet.

I took her hands out of my hair and without thinking, pinned them by her sides and brought my face up to hers in a quick motion. I had to. I had to do it. I couldn't stand it anymore.

I closed my eyes and slowly brought my lips down to hers. I could taste the salt of her tears on her lips, but I didn't care.

I turned into goo and melted into her. I gave so much into this kiss, and it felt so good. I tangled my hands into her hair and brought her face impossibly closer to mine.

It took me less than a second to realize that she was kissing me back, and my heart fluttered because she was accepting it. She accepted this.

The second the kiss got more aggressive, I felt her try to move her arms and I let them go, forgetting that I was holding them down.

I thought she might put them in my hair or grab me, but instead she lightly pushed me away, her fingers cold on my chest. I sat next to her and she sat up.

We were both panting, and I had to close my eyes to take everything in.

"Edward…What are you doing?"

I opened my eyes. What does she mean? I think what I was doing was pretty obvious. "Um…kissing you?"

Her response made my heart plunge into my stomach. "Why?"

Why was she asking? I was sure she felt the same way about me as I did about her. I was sure of that during the kiss. Why did I have to explain it? I wasn't really ready to pour my
heart out yet.

"What do you mean, 'why'?"

"Why did you kiss me?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "I…um…I don't know…Just because…" Just because? "Should we, um – should we pretend this didn't just happen?"

She just stared at me and nodded.

No! That wasn't what I wanted to say! And this wasn't how it was supposed to go! We were supposed to kiss and…I don't know…confess our love to each other? It sounded childish,
but I didn't care.

I wanted to punch myself in the face. I was so angry.

I couldn't even control my body enough to keep myself from kissing her.

You're such a strong man, Edward. Such a strong man.

And just like that, my anger turned to embarrassment. I got rejected by Bella. I didn't know how to act as if this had never happened. I don't know why I'd suggested that,
because it did happen.

It happened because of me.

I ruined our friendship.

Oooh...What is Edward doing kissing her?!
Oh, and how did he find Bella & Jake? And wasn't he supposed to be hanging out with Jasper?

*Gasp* ...Edward never answered those when Bella asked.

hahaha

Reviews, please. =)