Note: You really are lucky people. It's another double bill!
Note2: I had the luck to be loaned an English copy of DH over the weekend, which proved exasperating, immensely useful and warm-glow-giving in equal measure. Exasperating because I started reading the ending instead of doing my homework, and because I realised my characterisation of Hestia in chapter four was completely up the creek. Immensely useful because I took copious notes so hopefully will avoid such problems in the future. And warm-glow-giving because it reaffirmed my undying love for the Malfoy family.
Chapter Six
Driving Miss McGonagall
Whatever doubts that Harry might previously have held about his professor's ability to drive were completely and utterly defenestrated at that moment in time. The black hatchback screamed forward with a noise akin to a cat that has just had its tail trodden on by someone wearing hobnail boots, and Harry grabbed onto the side of his seat for purchase, extremely glad that he had put his seatbelt on. He blinked a few times to refocus after the sudden change of speed and felt the colour drain out of his face on seeing that they were headed straight towards a house. If the car didn't pull up and fly like the Anglia soon, or if Professor McGonagall did not swerve, then they were going to end up as a rather decorative wall-hanging on the outside of a two-bed semi in the middle of Surrey.
The car did not pull up and fly, and Professor McGonagall did not swerve. The car went straight on, and Harry braced himself for impact, trying to close his eyes but finding himself unable to. Of all the ways to go, he had not expected this one.
But the imminent crash never came. The car bounced off the wall as if it was made of rubber, leaving both house and vehicle completely undamaged. The same could not be said of the Death Eaters that had been following them. One of them crashed headlong into the side of the house, and the professor swung the steering wheel to direct them back onto the road. Harry looked round, desperately trying to find any sign of the second shape that had been following them. Even though her eyes never moved from the road in front of her, Professor McGonagall seemed to know what he was looking for.
"I believe he has gone for reinforcements," she said grimly. "With luck, we will be able to make it to the Burrow before they arrive, although I hold out little hope." She pressed her foot even further down on the accelerator pedal; Harry was amazed that they could go any faster than they were already travelling. This time, when he successfully looked at the speedo, his heart leapt to his mouth for the opposite reason – they were now going so fast that the needle was shuddering violently against the limiter. They'd hit a hundred and eighty miles an hour and, from the sounds that the engine was making, they'd left it far, far behind. Within a few minutes, they had reached the main road; at least, Harry could see the intermittent lights of other cars. He wondered why he had not seen any other cars on their journey this far; perhaps they had been going so fast that he hadn't seen them. It was only as the professor touched the brakes just long enough for the world to stop being quite such a blur past the windows that he realised that they had not been travelling on the road for the past few minutes, but rather over a field that over looked the road.
Professor McGonagall swung the steering wheel round and Harry could not help but give an exclamation of horror as the car flew over the flimsy fence that kept cows from falling onto the road. They landed in the fast lane behind a Citroen and a Ferrari and undertook both of them without stopping. Harry couldn't help but wonder how many galleons' worth of speeding fines the teacher had clocked up, and this in turn reminded him of another unavoidable point.
"Professor, I don't suppose this car is invisible, is it? Only muggles are fairly strict about their traffic laws… And I don't think any of them are accustomed to seeing a car like this go quite so fast. It's not the speed that's the problem," he added quickly, "it's the fact it's a Hyundai."
Professor McGonagall looked at him blankly for a brief second before composing herself.
"Of course Potter, you're right."
She reached up and prodded around on the driver's sunvisor with her wand, and suddenly the air was filled with blue lights and the unmistakeable sound of a police siren.
"Professor Burbage's idea," she explained, her expression completely deadpan. "Useful, no?"
Harry couldn't help but smile, but the brief moment of mirth did not last long. A dark shape caught his eye in the wing mirror and he twisted in his seat to see the shadows of robed figures weaving in and out of the cars behind them. Harry couldn't tell if they were riding broomsticks or if they were flying unaided, but they were definitely getting closer.
There was a thunderous crash on the roof of the car, and Harry surmised that it had been caused by a Death Eater apparating on top of it. The sudden jolt caused Professor McGonagall to swerve violently, and once she had finally managed to regain control of the vehicle, she pulled out her wand.
"Somehow I think that even police sirens won't distract the muggles from our unwanted passenger," she said through gritted teeth, "and since our presence has been uncovered already, there is little point in holding back…"
The last word became more of a shriek as the car shuddered under the force of a spell from the wizard riding on top of it, and in that moment Harry felt the uncomfortable sensation of being disillusioned. He surmised that the entire car and its occupants were now as good as invisible to muggle eyes, but the undeniable howling of the police blues and twos remained. Risking a glance out of the rear window to determine the whereabouts of their pursuers, Harry could see the baffled faces of the other drivers on the road that they were passing, wondering no doubt where the siren was coming from. The other Death Eaters that had been following them seemed to have fallen back, and Harry could tell from the lights dancing in the sky that the Order had caught up with them and was providing a worthy distraction. If they could only get rid of the persistent wizard atop the car, who was intent on destroying it piece by piece. From the amount of jolts and jarring that the vehicle had already withstood, Harry surmised that it was definitely not a muggle car, and that it had various protective charms in place.
"If I could just undo his sticking spell…" Professor McGonagall was muttering as she continued to weave in and out of the other road-users. "Not even a magician can stand on top of a car travelling at three-hundred miles an hour unaided. The problem is the shields that are in place… They work both ways, whilst his spells cannot get in, mine cannot get out either. I can only disapparate… The wards will not hold forever, we can't simply ignore it…"
The professor was talking to herself rather than Harry; indeed he was of the opinion that she had perhaps forgotten his presence beside her. Presently she took a deep breath.
"There's only one thing for it." Professor McGonagall turned to Harry. "Potter, you'll have to take the wheel."
Harry started to protest, but before he could do so, she had disapparated. Harry lunged across the car and grabbed the steering wheel, but thankfully this Hyundai, like the Anglia had, seemed to possess some degree of intelligence of its own, and nothing befell them in the slight pause between drivers except a slight loss of pace. Hoping with every fibre of his being that the car would continue to drive itself and he would not have to do much other than point it in the right direction occasionally, Harry undid his seatbelt and slid into the driver's seat, keeping one hand tightly gripped on the steering wheel at all times. Once he was as comfortably settled as possible, he realised that he didn't have any idea in which direction he needed to go to reach the Burrow. He knew that it was south-west of Privet Drive, but his geographical knowledge of Britain's major highways was somewhat lacking.
At least the car had stopped being battered around quite as much, and Harry did not like to think of the duel that was going on atop the vehicle. It was definitely a duel, he could hear the spells flying back and forth, and he was very glad that he could not see what was going on above him. He thought of Professor McGonagall's words about sticking spells, and he glanced around at the cars that they were sharing the road with. Even though none of them were going quite as fast as they were, Harry was certain that neither headmistress nor Death Eater would survive being run over if they were to fall. He had to get them off the main road, but there were no exits coming up. Harry grimaced at the thought of what he was about to do, then took a deep breath and swung the car violently to the left, praying that the protection that had caused it to bounce off the house earlier still held fast, and that he would come out of any unanticipated collisions in one piece. Perhaps it was the fact that the car was disillusioned, or that it was still making frantic siren noises, but for whatever reason, Harry managed to get across two lanes of traffic without meeting any other travellers, and he continued to keep the car going straight, across the fields. There were trees to the left and right of them but miraculously, none in front. Harry could tell whether this was because the car was swerving to avoid them of its own accord, for he was certainly not doing anything in the way of steering, or whether the trees themselves were jumping out of the way. After his experiences with the Whomping Willow, he would not have been at all surprised to find that there were some trees in the wizarding world, ones that he had yet to acquaint himself with, that were capable of leaving their roots behind in order to avoid being hit by wayward Hyundais. Perhaps he had just discovered a completely new species living in northern Hampshire, but it was not the time for getting distracted. Harry was still horribly aware of the sounds of a magical battle raging above him and he wished that he could do something to help. It was a sobering thought, the image of Professor McGonagall engaged in an all-out duel. During his time at Hogwarts he had never seen her use combative magic, indeed she had had no reason to, and it whilst it was not easy to forget that she was a formidable witch, it was harder to remember and accept the fact that she knew far more magic than that of her own specialised field. All the same, however capable the headmistress might have been in the field of duelling, Harry was determined that the fight on the car's roof would not go on for much longer.
Presently, the car gave a violent lurch to the left under the force of a spell, and Harry had to use all his strength to get the steering wheel back in a straight line. Suddenly everything seemed to be an awful lot louder, and the effects of the magic that was taking place on top of the vehicle seemed to be affecting it ever more acutely than it had been doing before. Harry surmised that the protective wards that surrounded the car were breaking down under the barrage. There was the crack of an apparition in his left ear, and Harry pulled out his wand ready to attack whoever had materialised next to him, but he lowered it when he found Tonks sitting there.
"Thought I'd do that before anyone else had the opportunity to," she said, twisting around in the seat and leaning over the headrest to run her wand over the grey felt of the roof, the wood leaving a little trail of sparks that faded into the darkness. "We saw the anti-apparition spell fade through the disillusion; I came to renew it…" There was a particularly painful sounding thump from outside, although it was now slightly muffled thanks to Tonks' efforts. "I'd better go; it's two against one up there." She went to disappear out of the car again but before she did so she cast a compass spell, the points and arrows shimmering on the dashboard.
"You're going too far North," she pointed out, and with that slightly helpful remark, she was gone.
Harry twisted the steering wheel and set off West, hoping that the car would simply travel as the crow flew, either avoiding or bouncing off everything in its path. He thought of Professor McGonagall outside, and he came up with a crude, non-magical but hopefully effective plan. The only flaw was that he couldn't communicate his intentions to the battling witch. Hopefully she would be shrewd enough to pick up on what he was trying to do and act accordingly. He twisted the steering wheel towards the nearest tree, staring intently at the low hanging branch. It was just a slim chance, probably not even worth it as he knew so little of what was occurring above him. He fought with the car to keep it on track; the little vehicle did not in any way want to be driven full pelt towards a tree against its wishes, and it was all he could do to stop it from veering off to avoid the obstacle. He swerved at the last minute and to his utter astonishment, he heard a thump as the branch hit one of the people on the roof and sent them flying. A momentary fear flooded through his veins and he glanced out of the rear-view mirror to check that he had indeed sent the right person flying. He spotted a dark shape on the ground in the distance behind them – the car was still going at over two hundred miles an hour despite the fact that Harry's feet were nowhere near the pedals – and he cursed his lack of foresight. The plan had been excellent at the time, but now that it had been put into action he could see the pitfalls all too clearly. There was a slight scrabbling noise as the sunroof flew open and something dropped down inside the car, the something then transforming from a blur of tabby-patterned fur into Professor McGonagall. She looked rather flushed and flustered and her hair was falling out of its customary bun, but other than that she appeared to be unharmed.
"Thank you Potter," she said, panting slightly. "Quick thinking there. I was able to break his sticking spell just in time for the branch to take care of the rest." She too looked behind her as she cast a silent spell to seal up the hole in the roof once more. "We shall have to keep a lookout, but it appears that our colleagues have the situation under control at the moment."
Professor McGonagall drew a map of Britain in the air with her wand and pointed at the place Harry assumed to be Surrey.
"Take us home," she said simply, and the car steered to the left of its own accord, the faint roaring in Harry's ears telling him that they had once more picked up a ludicrous amount of speed. He wondered how magical cars came to have such a level of independent thought; whether it came as a result of the enchantments or as an unintended side-effect. He thought of Mr Weasley's wise words of what seemed like so many years ago, and he wondered where the Hyundai kept its brain. Under the bonnet in the engine perhaps. He was tempted to ask Professor McGonagall, but it did not feel appropriate, admitting the fact that his mind was focussed on such trivial things when their lives were in a very real peril. Thankfully, he was saved from his quandary by the witch herself.
"I will never understand how Arthur and Charity manage to make these things so clever," she mmuttered under her breath as she fixed her hair in the rear-view mirror. "Now, all we have to do is pray that its cleverness can get us to the Burrow in one piece before the magic runs out." She turned to Harry. "Professor Burbage only imbued it with so much power, and it has had to withstand quite a bit in the past few minutes."
Harry nodded, but it was only ten minutes later that their prayers were needed. The car gave an almighty clang, followed by a feeble stutter, and then a cough. It sounded as if it had run out of petrol, and judging from their rapidly decreasing speed, that was the most logical explanation for what had happened. Harry could feel the protective charms fading along with the speed, and they were almost at a complete unprotected standstill when Harry spotted the shadowy form of the Burrow on the horizon, and in that moment the car, perhaps sensing the nearness of its owner, put on a final burst of speed. Unfortunately, what they gained in velocity, they lost in general control, and before Harry or Professor McGonagall could do anything, they were heading straight for the wall of the house. This time, Harry knew that the car would not bounce…
Note3: Hehe! I wasn't sure about this chapter because I was in a funny mood whilst writing it and I got The Dreaded Block halfway through. It ended up being a lot more tongue in cheek than I intended, but I couldn't think of a way to change it. It also ended up far longer than I was expecting. This, though, is a good thing.
Note4: Google Maps has a journey from central Surrey to the Devon town of Ottery St Mary as taking an average of three hours. Harry and Minerva managed it in about thirty minutes… Now, onwards!