A/N: HAPPY WEDNESDAY! Thank you so much for your reviews. I read each and every one and my husband makes fun of me because of the smile on my face. Big hugs to all of you!
SMeyer owns all Twilight characters. No copyright infringement intended.
Meet me at the bottom for some news.
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Chapter 6
I was sitting at the kitchen table in our house in Ft. Hood, waiting for Jacob to show up. I'd told him I would try to leave him behind in Forks, but with everything that had happened that day, I needed him.
Billy had undergone surgery, and it was a waiting game to see if he would make it. His heart was apparently weak from the infection, and the surgery had been tough on him. After we were told that we wouldn't be able to see him anymore that night, Edward and his father, who'd driven to Seattle to bring us clean clothes, insisted that we get food and go back to the hotel. Edward and I were sharing a room, but it had two queen-sized beds.
After a quick shower, I put on my pajamas and went to bed, and as I dozed off, I could hear Edward in the shower. I must have snoozed before he got into bed because I didn't hear another thing until I heard myself calling for Jacob in the kitchen of the house in Ft. Hood.
"Jake, come on. I know what I told you, but I really need to talk to you," I pleaded. I heard someone behind me in the room, and I turned to see Edward walk into the kitchen and sit down next to me in the familiar scrubs and white coat with the stethoscope around his neck.
"Bella, why don't you talk to me about how you're feeling? I'm lying in the bed right across the room from you. I think if you'd wake me up and talk to me, I'd surprise you with how much I want to support you," he suggested.
"Look, you've got your own shit. I can't burden you with my mess," I responded.
"Bella, if I wasn't more than willing to take on your stuff, I wouldn't be sleeping in the bed in the same room with you. I wouldn't have blown off my job and insisted that my chief resident give me emergency leave for me to make this trip, and I wouldn't have sat with you holding your hand, waiting for you to talk to me. I wouldn't insert myself into your life as I've done, and if you didn't believe that I was ready to take on your shit, I wouldn't be sitting here next to you in a place I've never been before explaining myself to you.
"Wake me up, dammit. I want to be there for you, because if I didn't, I'd be somewhere else, and we both know it," he insisted. With that, he rose from the chair and walked off. I jerked awake and rubbed my eyes trying to figure out what the hell a living Edward Cullen was doing in my dreams. Apparently, the latest stress with Billy's condition had sent me over the edge.
I opened my eyes, turned on my side, and saw Edward sitting up on the side of his bed, watching me and looking very wide awake. From what I could tell, he was only wearing a pair of boxers, and his naked torso caused my heart to speed up to a very dangerous level.
"Are you okay? You were shouting in your sleep," he informed. I was grateful that the room was mostly dark because I was certain that I was glowing bright red with embarrassment at both, my outburst in my sleep and my ogling of his hard body.
I sat up in the bed and swung my legs around, mirroring his position on the side of my own bed, completely aware that I was only wearing a tank top and sleep shorts. I supposed Esme thought it was what I slept in and that's why she packed the outfit. When I sorted through my suitcase, I wasn't really left with a lot of choice. "I'm sorry. Apparently, I talk in my sleep. I didn't mean to wake you. I usually don't shout," I answered quietly.
Edward scooted back on his bed to the far side and patted the empty side next to him. "Get in," he replied. Without hesitation, I rose from my bed and walked to his, climbing in next to him. He covered us up and wrapped his arm around my back, pulling me closer so that my head was resting on his naked shoulder. The heat from his body was seeping into mine, and I found it strangely comforting. I chalked it up to sleeping alone for four years.
I knew I needed to talk to him about what was going on with me before he jumped to the logical conclusion that I was certifiable. "I'm afraid that if I lose Billy, it's going to be like losing Jacob all over again. After Jake was killed, I spent a lot of time with Billy. I've known him for so long, and he's like a second father to me. His daughters are horrible women, and I've been the one taking care of him for a long time. When Jake went off to boot camp, I actually stayed with Billy while I was going to community college. He's the last connection to Jacob that Jax has, and I'm afraid that without Billy around to tell her stories about Jacob and the tribe and spend time with her, she'll never really get a sense of what a great man her father was," I confessed as my tears fell on his naked shoulder.
"Tell me about him. You haven't really told me much about Jacob except that the two of you were sweethearts for a long time and you were only married for three weeks before he deployed. He sounds like the kind of guy with whom I could have been friends," Edward remarked.
"Well, I'm not sure if you and Jake would have had a lot in common besides the fact that you're both exceptional men, but everyone who ever met Jacob liked him. He was easy going most of the time, but he was very protective of the people he loved.
"He loved tinkering with cars, and he and I used to discuss the idea that after he got out of the Army, he wanted to open his own garage in Forks. Every night we talked about the future and made grand plans. We were going to have three children, and we were going to build a house near the water so that Jacob and our son could just walk down the hill and go fishing. I'd taken computer classes and thought that I'd probably get some type of job as a secretary or something, but I didn't care. My family, or the idea of family, was more important to me than a career.
"We even discussed that maybe if we got to a point where we were making enough money to take care of our family, I could work part-time or even quit my job and stay home with the kids. That was actually a dream of Jake's…to be able to support his family so that I didn't have to work. He was old-fashioned like that," I explained.
It was suddenly incredibly easy to open up to Edward about my life with Jacob. He gently stroked his hand up and down my back and listened. That meant more to me than anything. "It sounds like Jacob and I might have had more in common than you'd think. It also sounds like the two of you loved each other very much. I can understand how that would make it impossible to get over the loss," Edward replied.
"Can I ask you something?" I asked propping myself up in his chest to better see his eyes. I didn't want to cause him pain, but I needed to ask him something.
"Sure," he answered honestly.
"Did you love Gianna in a way that makes it impossible to get over her?" I asked. It seemed like something I needed to know.
"I loved her very much, and I don't believe I'll ever be over her death, but I've learned to live with it and even make peace with it. I realized I'd have to address the grief and work through it if I ever wanted to have another relationship in my life, and I guess I have in my own way. Dealing with my daughter's death, though, has proved to be far more difficult, as I'm sure you can imagine," he answered.
"Have you gone to counseling?" I asked. I wasn't exactly the poster child of successful grief counseling, but it had helped…some. Although, I was pretty sure talking to my dead husband would garner a big "F" on my mental health report card.
"I've talked to my mom and dad, but I've never gone to a group like you attend. Has it helped?" he asked. I needed to actually be honest and let the guy know just how crazy I was, so I decided to come clean about a few less-than-desirable glitches in my emotional and mental armor.
"Uh, I don't think I'd judge Reverend Weber's grief support group based on me. I talk to my dead husband, or maybe shout at him, in my sleep," I confessed waiting for the shock to appear on his face.
Surprisingly, it didn't. "What do you talk about, if I can ask?" he responded which surprised me. I assumed he'd be packing his shit and getting as far away from me as he could, but he only played with my hair.
"Whatever happens to be on my mind at the time. It's been explained to me that it's just me having a discussion with my subconscious, but it manifests itself in the form of Jacob. We used to talk about everything, and I guess I can't let that go. Though, tonight, I was actually sitting at my kitchen table in Ft. Hood talking to…you," I confessed. Might as well cut the whole crazy cake at one time.
"What were we discussing?" he asked nonplussed.
"Um, that I should talk to you about what's bothering me. You told me that I should wake you up and talk to you about my fears related to losing Billy. You told me I needed to give you a chance and not just assume that you had enough of your own shit to deal with in your life that you couldn't or wouldn't want to help me deal with mine," I answered. I looked at him, and even in the dark, I could see a smile on his face.
"I'm a smart son-of-a-bitch…even in your dreams," he joked. I couldn't help but playfully slap his chest.
"Yeah, well, anyway, I'm just really worried about losing Billy," I surmised.
"Bella, I can assure you that the surgeon who operated on Billy is one of the best orthopedic surgeons in the business. I had Dad call in a favor yesterday and get Dr. Gerandy to take Billy as a patient. It all rests in God's hands now," Edward assured. I was sort of surprised at his statement, but I supposed I shouldn't have been. The entire family was compassionate and had treated Jax and I very well. It shouldn't surprise me that Carlisle Cullen would call in a favor for a man he didn't even know because he was important to me.
"I truly appreciate how your family has treated Jax and me. I mean, Billy means nothing to them, but they haven't hesitated to bend over backwards to help us with anything we need," I offered. It was the truth. The Cullens had gone above and beyond the call of duty on more than one occasion.
"We regard you as an extension of family, Bella. You and Jax have a firm place in the Cullen clan. Now, if there's nothing else you want to discuss, we should get some sleep. You can see Billy in the morning at 8:00. I gave them my cell number in case anything happened during the night, and my cell is right here on this table," he announced as he pointed to the nightstand on the other side of the bed nearest him.
"Thank you for everything. Good night, Edward," I responded.
"No thanks necessary. Good night, sweetheart," he answered, kissing the top of my head sweetly.
He was right. All I needed to do was give him a chance. He was supportive and attentive, and I never thought I'd find that with anyone other than Jake. I had a lot of things to think about.
##
"There's my girl," Edward called as we walked into his parents' house having just returned from Seattle. My parents had relieved me at the hospital and sent me home with Edward and Carlisle. They were going to stay with a friend of my dad's for the week and keep tabs on Billy, but that left me in a huge lurch with regard to what to do with Jax in the evenings while I worked.
I'd spoken to Sue Clearwater, and she'd volunteered to stay at my house a couple of nights while they were gone, but she had her own family to care for, and I really didn't feel I could impose. Edward suggested that his parents would take care of Jax, but they'd already done more than I could ever thank them for, so I politely declined even with Carlisle protesting in the car all the way back to Forks. I needed to find a solution, and I was hard pressed for what was the answer.
"Redward. Where's Big Pop?" Jax asked as Edward scooped her up.
"He's still at the hospital, but he's getting better and better every day, and he asked me to give you a big kiss," Edward informed her as he gave her a big smacking kiss on her cheek, causing her to laugh uncontrollably.
"Jax, I need to call Embry and get him to pick us up. Take me to where your things are and let's get you packed up," I announced. She wiggled from Edward's arms and ran off in the direction of the stairs, and I quickly followed her.
She led me down a hallway to an open door and dragged me inside. When I looked around, I was in shock. It looked like the Mattel Company had made another drop and the room where Jax had been sleeping looked like a fucking toy store. "Where'd all this stuff come from?" I asked.
"Mesme says it's my room. Lookey," Jax pointed to a campsite that had been set up in the corner of the room. Apparently, Barbie liked to rough it in the great outdoors in an RV, complete with battery-operated Tiki torches and a fake campfire.
"Wow, this looks like FAO Schwarz in here," I heard from the doorway, seeing Edward standing there leaning against the wall with a smirk on his face.
"Can you even begin to explain how this happened?" I asked. I had no idea how Esme had orchestrated the scene in front of me.
"My mother is a whiz at internet shopping. That's about the only thing I can come up with. Now, I can take you to get your car. Apparently, Mom bought a car seat while we were gone, and with the help of someone named Officer Steve at the Fork's Police Department, it's firmly affixed in her BMW. There's no need for anyone to come pick you up. That just means extra trips for everyone involved, so let me take you," Edward suggested. He had a point. I didn't want to burden Embry with driving all the way to the Cullen's house which was on the opposite side of Fork's from La Push, so it made more sense.
After we packed up the least amount of shit that Esme would let us get away with, Edward loaded our things into his mother's car to take us to La Push to pick up my CRV. We'd hugged and kissed the Cullens for their kindness, and the couple seemed sad that we were leaving.
"So, where are we going?" Edward asked. I directed him to Billy's house, and we found my car sitting outside the garage. I looked inside and didn't find my keys, so I knew I'd have to go to Embry's house to collect them.
"Okay, you guys wait here while I run down to Embry's house and get my keys. I'll be right back," I instructed. I quickly ran down the street and wasn't surprised to see that Embry was at home.
I knocked on the door, and he opened it, and for a quick minute, I thought it was Jacob. I shook my head to shake off the memory, and pulled up the best smile I could. "Hey, can I get my keys? How much do I owe you, by the way?" I asked, reaching for my wallet.
He stepped aside for me to enter his home, and I looked up the street to see Edward and Jax playing in the yard. I walked inside and Embry closed the door behind me. "How's Billy?" he asked.
"He's doing better. Look, I'll catch you up tomorrow, but I need to get Jax home and get her to bed. Can I have my keys?" I asked.
"How'd you get here?" Embry asked as he walked into the kitchen of his house and reached up to a nail, pulling down my key ring.
"Edward Cullen brought us. His parents watched Jax while we were in Seattle. Call me tomorrow morning, and I'll fill you in," I responded impatiently.
Just then, there was a knock at the front door, and when Embry opened it, Edward was standing with Jax in his arms. She looked tired, her head resting on Edward's shoulder, and she was sucking her thumb which was something I'd worked very hard to stop. "Um, Jax is ready to go home. Is there anything wrong?" Edward asked as he entered the house without invitation. I could see he wasn't pleased.
"Who are you?" Embry asked as he held his arms out for Jax, who quickly declined the invitation. I could see that Embry's feelings were hurt, and I needed to fix the situation before it escalated out of control.
"I'm Edward Cullen. I'm a good friend of Bella and Jax. You must be Embry. It's nice to meet you," Edward offered graciously. Embry didn't take it well at all.
"Bells, I need to talk to you," Embry announced as he grabbed my arm and dragged me out the back door to his small porch.
"What's that guy to you?" he snapped after the back door was closed. I could tell he was pissed, and I wasn't sure why.
"He's a friend. What the fuck is wrong with you?" I asked.
"Is he the guy you're going to replace Jake with? You know, you're a member of our extended family, and we stay with our own. I've been waiting for you to give me any indication that you're ready to move on from Jacob, and then you go start dating a guy like that? I promised Jake that if anything happened to him, I'd look out for you. I tried in the beginning, but you needed space. I've been waiting for you to get to the place where you could be ready for me, and now you're dating a guy like that?" he complained.
"Embry, you were Jacob's best friend, and you've been a good friend to me. That's all there is between us, you know. I have feelings for Edward, and you're going to have to get used to it, so knock off this bullshit about having feelings for me. You're under no obligation to take care of me or Jax. Jake's dead, Embry, and I've got to move on and live my life. If you want to honor Jake's memory, keep a better eye on his father. You should have been able to see that he was sick as well as I did," I snapped.
Maybe I was projecting my guilt over Billy onto Embry, but what he'd said pissed me off. There was no replacing Jake. The only thing I could do was move on, which I was actually trying to do. I needed to do what was best for Jax and me, and living in the past wasn't it. I grabbed my keys from his hand as I stormed through the house, and I was ready to go.
"Come on, let's go," I announced as I walked through the living room to the front door. Without a word, Edward walked out on the porch with my sleeping daughter in his arms and waited for me to close the door to a piece of my past.
It was symbolic, but it was necessary. I didn't have to cut out the friends I had in La Push from my life completely, but I had to move on and make a new life for my daughter and myself. As we walked up the street to Billy's house, I looked to my left and saw Edward carrying my daughter and I knew that maybe I needed to be more open with him. Maybe, just maybe, he was the key to my future. I had no idea, but I had to be open to the possibility. It was a surprising revelation.
##
Edward insisted on following us home that night. I wasn't sure what he thought about the encounter with Embry. Hell, I wasn't sure what I thought about the encounter with Embry. When we pulled into the driveway, he was very quick to jump out of Esme's car and pull Jax out of the backseat of mine where she was out like a light.
"I can get her. I'm used to it," I complained. I was struggling with becoming more dependent on him because I wasn't sure that was a good thing. I'd tried to remain independent and take care of my life by myself so that I didn't become dependent on someone who wasn't exactly mine. My increasing dependence on Edward was seriously starting to worry me.
"Well, considering she's nearly as big as you and the fact that I don't think you'll allow me to give you a massage when you put your back out, I think I'll just carry her in," he whispered. I grabbed our bags from his car and let us into the house.
Without waiting for anything from me, he took her up to her room and put her to bed. I went to my porch and grabbed the mail and tossed it on the counter. When he walked down the stairs, I saw a smile on his face. "What happened?" I asked.
"She asked me to read to her, and before I got the book open, she was out. She's so great, Bella. Mom wanted to keep her, you know. Now, are you working tomorrow night?" he asked as he sat down on the couch in the living room while I perused the mail carelessly.
"I might have to call in sick because I don't have a sitter unless I can convince Rose to stay here with her tomorrow night. I'm glad Mom and Dad are in Seattle with Billy, but that puts me in a bind," I responded without thinking.
"I know exactly who to…" he began. I held up my hand for him to stop. His mother had already done too much, and she had a very important job at the hospital. I couldn't rely on the hospital administrator to be my back-up babysitter. With the amount of money I was going to have to cough up for Billy's hospital stay and surgery, I couldn't afford to pay someone very much, but it was absolutely imperative that I find someone to be a back-up babysitter.
"No, your mother has been more than accommodating with regard to Jax. She has a full-time job, and I can't impose on her again. I may need to take off tomorrow to see if I can try to find someone else to help," I responded as I sunk down on the couch next to him.
"Well, I'll keep my ears open if anyone is looking to pick up a little extra cash," Edward responded.
His mention of cash reminded me of something that I needed to ask him. "Hey, can I ask you something? How much will this hospital bill cost me? "I asked.
"Um, well, we can look into different avenues with regard to reducing the cost, but the surgery, hospital stay, and helicopter will cost a lot. I'll help you as much as I can," Edward offered.
"I have about three hundred thousand left from Jake's life insurance. Will that begin to cover it?" I asked. I wanted to make sure that Billy didn't feel the burden of the bills. I was prepared to pay everything I had to make sure he was taken care of. It wasn't my money. It was the money that the U.S. Government had paid me when my husband had been killed. I held no animosity toward the government for the way my life had turned out, but no dollar amount would ever bring my husband back.
"Bella, I'll help you figure it out," Edward offered as he rose from the couch. He kissed my cheek gently and left. I was tired, so I wasn't completely upset when he left, but I knew I would miss the feel of his body next to mine. I'd felt it for two nights, and it wouldn't be easy to forget.
##
"Momma, where's my Barbie car?" Jax called as I dressed. I had made fliers looking for a babysitter, and I was ready to take them around town. I knew I'd have to interview a lot of people until I found someone with whom I was comfortable, and I completely hated the idea of leaving my daughter with someone I didn't know very well.
The doorbell rang, and I ran down the stairs without answering Jax regarding the whereabouts of her Barbie car. I was certain it was in her room somewhere, but with all the pink in there, it was likely hard to spot. I couldn't help but shake my head at the sight of all of the Barbie stuff taking up space where only blocks, books, and puzzles had been before.
I opened the front door and was completely surprised by the person standing on my doorstep. "Hi, Bella. I hear you're in the market for an evening nanny. I need a place to live, so I think we could strike a deal," Alice Brandon called to me as I stood dumfounded in my doorway that morning.
I could only hug her. She and Jax had hit it off at Rose and Emmett's, and I knew she had it bad for Jasper, so I wasn't completely surprised that she wanted to stay in town, but I was grateful. I had no idea how she knew what I needed, but I was glad she was there.
"Alice, how'd you know?" I asked.
"Edward called me sometime in the middle of the night and left me a message. I called him this morning and he explained what was going on, so here I am, very excited about the prospect. Now, I can't pitch in a lot on rent, but I hope that the fact that I'll babysit Jax and I can cook might cause you to give me a chance. I really like you, and I think we can be great friends," Alice responded, still standing on my porch.
"Oh, forgive me. Please, come in," I answered. She danced into my house, and the whole damn place seemed to light up. I had no idea what Alice Brandon would bring to my table, but it almost seemed magical.
"Where's Jax?" Alice asked. I pointed to the living room, and Alice dropped her bag at the stairs and disappeared. A few minutes later, I heard the two of them laughing and then they joined me in the kitchen as I made breakfast for the three of us.
"I need a few things. I need directions to the park. I need to know if she's allergic to anything, and I need to know your schedule. Edward's message said that you went to work today at 4:00 PM, so I assume I'll be responsible for dinner and evening activities. I think that sounds perfectly peachy. So?" Alice asked as she situated Jax into her booster seat at the table as I plated breakfast.
"Um, I can't pay you much, but I'll gladly let you live here. Jasper's a great guy, and I know he's completely overwhelmed by you, so I'm certain he's happy you're going to stay in town for a while," I responded.
Knowing I was going to break the bank to pay for Billy's care had made me contemplate my financial situation overnight. I needed to be more frugal, but in order to earn a living I needed to have someone who could take care of Jax in the evenings. It was time for me to quit depending on my parents and stand on my own two feet.
"The financial details aren't important to me. I'm just glad to have a place to lay my head. Now, I think we should eat while breakfast is hot," Alice announced quite confidently. I was happy, and my daughter seemed to have met her other half by the way she was smiling at Alice, so I had no complaints. I prayed it would work out.
As we settled into breakfast, I was ready to begin grilling the stranger who I'd just agreed could move in. I didn't know why it felt like her moving in was the right thing to do, but I didn't hesitate to extend the invitation which wasn't like me at all. "So, tell me about yourself," I prompted as I cut up Jax's eggs for her.
"I grew up moving from one foster home to another until I was taken in by Mack and Kathleen McCarty. Emmett's eight years older than me. He'll be thirty-one soon, but he was always really great to me. I met Edward when he came to Virginia to visit us one summer while he and Emmett were in undergrad. I was the nosey teen girl who tagged along, but I have to say that they never treated me badly. Anyway, when I turned eighteen, I struck out on my own and ended up in Seattle working at a design company. When Emmett told me he and Rosalie were getting married, I had to be there, and then I met Jasper, and well, that's me," Alice answered without any hesitation.
"I didn't meet the McCartys at the wedding. Were they there?" I asked. I remember looking around to see if anyone looked remotely like Emmett, but I never thought to ask about it.
"No. They don't approve of Rosalie because she's not Catholic, so they refused to come. Very shortsighted, in my opinion. How about you? What's your story?" Alice asked.
Mine was a little more difficult to explain. I didn't know if she'd been filled in on my history and just wanted to hear it from me, or if she really didn't know anything about me. "Widowed for four years now. I married my high school sweetheart at twenty. He was in the Army, and we married three weeks before he deployed to the Middle East. He was killed by a bomb in front of a market in Baghdad. He didn't know about Jax. Unfortunately, she'll never know her dad, but at least I have a piece of him with me," I answered. Her fork clattering on her plate got my attention.
I looked up to see a look of shock on her face and I wondered what I'd said to surprise her. "Alice? What is it?" I asked.
"That's so sad. I had no idea. I just assumed that you were either divorced or never married Jax's father. Nobody told me any of this. I'm so sorry. I have no right to…" she began with tears in her eyes.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lay it all on you so nonchalantly. It's just that I've learned to tell the story without really listening to what I'm saying. If I dwell on it, I burst into hysterical tears and that really upsets Jax. I don't keep it a secret from her that her father's gone, but I don't pound it into her either. You have nothing to worry about. You asked and I answered," I responded.
"I suppose you'd have to. So, is Edward the first man you've dated since you lost your husband?" she asked. That question was one I was less comfortable about answering.
"Um, we're not really dating. We're very good friends, and we have meals and spend time together, but we aren't romantically involved," I answered hoping it sounded plausible. I could easily accept his friendship, but I wasn't sure about anything romantic. I was still trying to figure that part out.
"I think that's what you think, but I know that's not what Edward thinks," Alice responded.
"Redward? Where's Redward?" Jax asked between bites of her breakfast.
"He's at the hospital," I answered as I sipped my coffee. Alice eyed me curiously.
"Wiff Big Pop?" Jax asked. I needed to change the subject.
"Sort of. Are you finished?" I asked quickly. She nodded and I got up from the table and wet paper towels to clean her up. After she was cleaned up, I let her down from her booster seat and she shot into the living room like a bullet.
"I'm sorry to say that in front of her. I'll have to engage my filter around her, but I really think you need to take a good look at your relationship with Edward. I know that he thinks an awfully lot of you and your daughter. I'd venture to say that he's in love with you. It's there in his voice when he speaks of you," Alice observed. It wasn't the first time I'd heard it.
"I think he's just attached to us because he likes to help people, and he sees us as people who need help. I don't take advantage of it, I promise you. We enjoy his company, as well as that of his parents, but I don't take advantage of anyone," I defended, lest she get the wrong idea about me.
"Oh, I wasn't insinuating anything like that at all. If it sounded like I was, I apologize. Dammit, here I've let my mouth overload my ass again," Alice berated herself.
"No need to apologize, Alice. Several people have made the same mistake with regard to our relationship. We're just very good friends. Now, come on. I'll show you to your room, and you can get settled. We'll talk more about what it takes to deal with my daughter in the evenings, and I'll go to the store and get groceries," I told her.
"Thanks for letting me stay, Bella. I won't be a burden, I promise," Alice answered. She followed me upstairs to the spare room and proceeded to make herself at home. I hoped it would work out. The arrangement was one that was perfect…that was if Alice Brandon and I could live together.
##
As I walked into the morgue that night, I could hear the gangsta rap music that Eric listened to when he was alone. He said it kept the ghosts away, and I couldn't help but laugh at his paranoia. When I rounded the corner, I saw him bobbing his head and working feverishly at the computer as Biggy Smalls serenaded him about being called "Big Poppa." He didn't notice me at first, but when he did, he nearly jumped out of his skin.
"Look whose back. I heard you were shacked up with Dr. Fuck-Em-All for the last few days. It's all over the circuit," Eric accused as he turned down the radio. I put my purse in my desk to his left and dropped down in my chair. There was a stack of files on my desk, and I could see the last few days had been very busy in the underbelly of Forks Hospital.
"I think you know me better than that. I was in Seattle with my father-in-law who had to have his leg amputated. It was touch and go whether he was going to live. There was no shacking or shagging with the good doctor," I answered as I picked up a file.
"Oh. I should have known Dr. Tightass was making shit up. So how is he?" Eric asked as I got to work. I gave him the highlights, neglecting to mention sharing the room…er, bed…with the hot doctor, but I didn't like being the subject of the "circuit" as Eric referred to the rumor mill at the hospital. I'd been gossiped about for far too long.
"What did she say?" I asked, my curiosity about Jane's comments regarding me getting the best of me.
"You want the quote or the summary?" he asked. I was pretty sure the quote was quite scathing.
"Give it to me straight," I responded, bracing myself for whatever he was going to tell me. She didn't like me before, and if Edward or Esme had arranged to get me time off to go to Seattle for Billy's surgery, I was pretty sure the word "whore" was used in connection with my name more than once around the circuit.
"Well, apparently, Dr. Fuck-Em-All called Dr. Dracula and arranged for you to have two days off without giving an explanation other than it was personal business. Jane called Esme Cullen to complain that she didn't like the fact that you were given emergency leave to go off and fuck Esme's son. That less than thought-through statement landed Jane a meeting with Dr. Esme this morning regarding said assessment.
"When Jane came back down at two this afternoon, she started throwing shit out of the drawers and cussing like I've never heard. Why, my ears were on fire from the words coming out of her potty mouth, I kid you not. From what I heard, Jane was extended the opportunity to take two days off without pay or to pack her shit and get the fuck out permanently. When Daddy Dearest showed up and Jane related the story to him, he told her that there was nothing he could do, and then he promptly left. That led to more cursing, during which you were called an opportunistic slut and a dirty whore, but in the end, she packed up her shit and left. We won't be seeing her until sometime on Thursday, thank the good Lord," Eric related.
So, it was actually along the lines of what I expected. I wasn't sure how I felt about any of it, so I decided not to think about it and buried myself in work. Of course, I couldn't help but think about it, but I tried not to dwell.
##
Eric came back from his break at 7:00 PM, and he wasn't alone. Edward was with him, and the two seemed to be chatting effortlessly. I could see that Eric was nearly about to take flight, and I wasn't sure who had a bigger crush on Dr. Cullen…me or Eric. Yes, I had been able to get myself to admit that I had a lot more than a crush on Dr. Cullen, but I certainly wasn't telling anyone about it.
"Angel. Are you ready to get some dinner? I brought us something since we never got to have our date in the garden. Eric assures me that he'll be fine without you if you go now," Edward announced. He winked at me, and I was certain that I heard Eric sigh like a southern belle at a cotillion.
"Um, okay. Eric are you sure?" I asked. He smiled at me, nodded in agreement, and walked out of the room.
"I think you just broke his heart by not taking him to dinner," I announced as I grabbed my purse and left my white jacket on my chair.
"Actually, I sat and had a coffee with him while he was eating his dinner. He told me about Jane Volturi. I'd heard talk, but I wanted a more accurate accounting, so I went looking for him. Don't you follow Dr. Sex Hair on Twitter?" he teased. I knew that was what it was called, but I barely sent text messages. There was nothing in my life that was worth tweeting about. I didn't even have a Facebook account. I was the most low-tech person of my generation.
"No, I don't. Sorry. So?" I asked as we walked up the stairs to go out into the garden behind the hospital. He was carrying a cooler and a bag, and I was very curious as to the contents.
"I'm actually glad to hear that. Hell, even my own mother follows it. Anyway, I'm sorry about the names Jane called you. They're all completely unfounded, but it's exactly what I'd expect from someone of her less-than-dazzling character. You know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I think none of those things about you," he remarked with a worried expression on his face. As I was about to open the door to go outside, he pulled on my arm to stop me.
"Edward, I know that you didn't say those things. Jane is vindictive and spoiled. She's not the first woman of that sort I've dealt with in my life. You have nothing to worry about," I answered. His next move would completely disarm me, but I couldn't lie and say it was unwelcomed.
He placed the cooler and the bag on the floor and pulled me into his arms, kissing me gently on the lips. It wasn't exactly passionate, but it was very sweet. It was soft, and his lips were warm and definitely inviting. I couldn't stop myself from wrapping my arms around his shoulders and stepping into his body, allowing him to tighten his grip on me. We stood there kissing for a moment, and then he pulled back and looked into my eyes. "I've wanted to do that for a long time. I hope I didn't misread the situation and take liberties you weren't prepared to give," he explained.
I was still holding onto him, so I thought that should be a good indication to him that I wasn't offended in the least. The fact that I kissed him back should have been a hint that I didn't hate the fact that he kissed me. "That was very nice. It's…um…it's been a long time," I answered.
The last man to kiss me like that was my husband. Kissing Edward Cullen was different than kissing Jake, but the feelings that I was experiencing weren't exactly foreign to me. The man did things to my body that I hadn't felt in a long time, and they weren't exactly unwanted by me.
He opened the door and picked up the cooler, and we walked outside into a nice summer evening. We made our way to a bench, and Edward spread a blanket on it and then motioned for me to sit down. "Why the blanket?" I asked.
"Bird shit," he answered. I laughed. Apparently, he was a man who thought of everything. He opened the cooler and handed me two wrapped sandwiches and a bottle of Snapple Pink Lemonade. He then pulled out a bag of chips from the bag and a bottle of water for himself.
"Turkey or ham?" he asked. I set my lemonade down on the bench between us and examined the sandwiches that were wrapped in wax paper. One was on a croissant, and the other was on some kind of bread that I couldn't recognize.
"Um, what's the bread?" I asked pointing to the sandwich.
"Pretzel bread. It is ham and Swiss on pretzel bread with stone-ground mustard. The other is turkey and smoked cheddar on croissant with a sun-dried tomato mayo. I made them myself," he announced. I didn't know when he'd had that kind of time, so I looked at him with a cocked eyebrow.
"I didn't come on duty until two this afternoon. I brought the ingredients and then put the sandwiches together just a bit ago. So?" he asked. The ham intrigued me, but I loved turkey and smoked cheddar. I took the croissant and handed him the ham, and he smiled.
"Good, this one is my favorite," he announced as he unwrapped the sandwich and took a healthy bite.
We ate for a few minutes looking around the garden at the blooming bushes. It was comfortable sitting with him. I enjoyed it very much, but I didn't overthink it…for once in my life. I was bound and determined to just live in the moment.
After a few minutes, he put down his sandwich and took a drink of water. "I called Dr. Gerandy earlier. Apparently, Billy's daughters finally showed up. They're going to search for an assisted living facility for their father in Port Angeles. They're both worried about him living alone but neither is willing to stick around and take care of him. Some daughters," Edward surmised.
I knew they were in Seattle, but I didn't know about the assisted living idea. Neither would talk to me when I called Billy, and of course, he didn't share that piece of information with me either, having announced that I already had enough to worry about with Jax and I had no need to worry about him.
"Fuck. Those two are so damned selfish. I don't know how the hell he's supposed to pay for that, and I won't be able to pay for it. After I pay the hospital bills, I won't have anything near what will be needed to pay for that," I snapped, placing my sandwich on the napkin in my lap.
"You're not paying for his hospital bills," Edward announced. I nearly choked on my lemonade.
"He certainly doesn't have it, and his disability isn't going to cover most of the costs. If Rachel or Rebecca had it, they'd never part with it, so it falls to me. I guess I'll have to move him in with me," I announced. I didn't know how I'd do it because my little house wasn't exactly designed for anyone in a wheelchair, but it was my responsibility.
"First, there are grants and special programs under which Billy falls due to his Native American status, which will take care of his hospital stay in Seattle and the surgery. Dr. Gerandy isn't going to charge for his services because he had students in the OR with him, and he used it as a teaching opportunity. Billy's disability will cover his hospital visit here in Forks. The Lifeflight Company graciously agreed to cut the bill for the evac by two-thirds if I contracted with them for six months of on-call duty. That leaves the obligation you feel the need to pay at about five-thousand dollars. Based on what you told me, you should be able to cover that," he announced as he shoved a handful of potato chips into his mouth.
I was, not surprisingly, stunned. He'd taken it upon himself to solve the problem, and I didn't know if I should hug him or curse him. I wasn't ready to concede that I needed someone to help me troll the murky waters of medical expenses, but he'd already taken care of it. I was speechless…for a minute.
"I can't let you do that. You have no obligations to my family. I appreciate you checking into all of it, but I can't let you obligate yourself to a contract to help me out. I can pay for it," I snapped. I didn't mean to sound so shitty, but I wasn't used to the likes of Edward Cullen, though if Jake were alive, he'd have made as many of the same arrangements as he could. That was another thing that reminded me that Edward was more like my Jacob than I ever imagined.
"Look, it helps me as much as it helps you. I talked to my attending about it, and she thinks it's a good idea for me. It's only eight hours a week, and the experience for me will be invaluable. It helps me hone my triage skills, and that'll go a long way in my career. It's a great opportunity for me," he announced, seemingly done with the conversation.
I wasn't, but I had no additional arguments at that moment. I owed him a huge debt of gratitude, and I didn't know how to pay him back. "Edward, I don't want to be indebted to anyone. You have to let me do something for you to return the very generous favor," I responded. He smiled at me and then he laughed.
"I've got the ultimate payback. It's two fold. First, you can go on a date with me on Saturday night. McCarty's back from his honeymoon, and I'm not working that night. Second, you can help me move. I found a place to live, and I'm finally ready to leave the nest. Of course, that's going to include buying furniture and all the shit that goes with setting up a house, so it's going to take a lot of your time. That's how you can pay me back. I hate doing shit like that," he answered.
I pondered it for a minute, and then I remembered Alice. "Why don't you get Alice to help you? She works in that field," I asked.
"Because I don't want Alice…I want you, Bella," he responded. I wasn't sure if he was just talking about the setting up of his house or something more, but at that moment, I wasn't prepared to explore the intent. I only nodded in agreement and continued to enjoy my dinner. The stewing would come much later.
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E/N: Poor girl's head is spinning. Please let me know what you think.
Now, for those of you who haven't found out yet, I've started another story on . It's called "A Fine Line Between Love & Hate." Summary: Divorce is a dirty business. A socialite decides that her husband is having an affair and hires the best divorce attorney she can find...Bella Swan. Who will the doctor bring to the mediation table, and what kind of history will opposing counsel share? Rated M (language & lemons). B&E POVs. Canon couples with a few odd pairings.
I hope you'll check it out. There are two chapters up already.
Okay, enough. Till next time…xoxo