Beta read by Duesal10
"HASHIRAMA! I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"
Madara stormed into the Hokage's office and Hashirama gulped. He had barely survived his brother and Toka's bombardments and now he had to deal with the fuming Uchiha.
Everyone, literally everyone seemed to be ganging upon him.
"What have you DONE?! Do you think it's funny to force me to sleep with a woman when I'm drunk?! And what the hell is wrong with you, throwing a party at my house with the Kumo ambassadors? Why is a wood clone of yours sleeping in MY bathtub with a woman?"
"Calm down, no one knows about this. Oh and that… I was originally sleeping with her, then in the morning I had to leave so … I … replaced my body with…" He couldn't muster his voice anymore, sure, he'd probably be able to take on Madara in battle, except that would be counterintuitive to the initial purpose of his matchmaking frenzies: developing and improving inter-clan relationships.
Alas, all he could do is solemnly anticipate the upcoming assaults and insults originating from a beyond infuriated Madara.
"STILL DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING! YOU MADE ME LOOSE MY VIRGINITY!" Tremors initiated throughout the entire building as an impact of the man's thunderous, indignant voice.
Suddenly a band of errand-running chuunins who had previously been clustered around the door burst in.
"Hokage-sama, you slept with Madara-san?" one of them imprudently and mistakenly asked.
"No… he… he… it's more like…" Hashirama gulped, wanting to clear this confusion.
Madara glowered at him.