Saphira and I watched the two men run off towards Therinsford. Then Saphira turned to me and asked, You don't know how to fly?
"Err, no," I said. I got down on all fours and began flapping my wings crazily, but I didn't so much as lift a centimeter off the ground.
The dragoness' eyes glittered mischievously. Climb onto my back.
I stared at her. "What?"
Climb on, she repeated, crouching to let me get on more easily.
"I have a very, very bad feeling about this," I muttered, but I heaved myself into the saddle anyways. I fingered one of the straps. "How does this thing work?"
Saphira didn't answer, just leapt into the air. I grabbed the spike in front of me so as not to fall off.
"Watch it!" I shouted at her. We were rapidly ascending, and the frigid wind was blasting past my face. "I'm scared of heights!"
She replied, laughing, Good! Then she flipped over, and I fell.
"Eff you, you little-" I swore at her. I was plummeting towards the ground at at least eighty miles per hour, and accelerating approximately a lot more per second. I howled, still screeching cuss words at the dragon, who was diving alongside me. We were falling through the clouds, literally, and I was soaked through. I looked down, but I wished I hadn't. The ground was a blur of brown, grey, and mainly green. I couldn't even see the individual houses from my height. "If I die, I swear, I am suing you!" I screamed at her.
Maybe it would help if you extended your wings a little? Saphira suggested unhelpfully.
"Thank you very much for that absolutely gorgeous piece of info, I'm sure, but- Hey, wait, why didn't I think of that?" I snapped my wings open, and they exploded with pain as I was jerked upwards from the sudden movement. I swore some more, but then I realized something important: I was gliding.
There, that wasn't so hard, was it? Saphira said, opening her wings as well so we were flying side by side.
"Oh, shut up already," I growled at her, but I don't think she heard over the wind.
Are you still scared of heights? Saphira taunted.
I swerved and landed on her left wing, messing up her flight pattern and dragging her down. Saphira growled in surprise, then playfully butted me off with her snout. Thus ensued the greatest aerial battle of all time between a human and a dragon. Well, technically, this was the first aerial battle between a human and a dragon, but that doesn't count.
We landed in a clearing a few hours later, and Saphira sent Eragon an image of where we were. We were both panting from our mock battle. I grinned at the dragoness.
"You're not too bad," I said, breathing heavily.
Saphira made her laughing sound again. Neither are you, human.
I was about to reply, but then I felt someone hammering away at my mind, and I set up my typical defense. You are stupid. You are stupid. You are stupid. Saphira turned her head and growled at some bushes. Said bushes quivered, and a man stepped out from them.
He was tall and slim, like a twig. He wore black armour, and a red cape billowed behind him in a dramatic semi-superhero fashion. His white face had a bunch of red lines crisscrossing it, and his hair was violent maroon. His fingernails were sharp and black, and in his hand he clutched a thin sword that was marred by a line that cut across the blade. His teeth were filed into points.
"Dude, you need to go easy on the make-up," was the first thing I said.
The man's sneering face twisted into confusion. "You aren't screaming and running away from me?"
"Umm, no," I said. "Why would I do that? You're too ugly to run away from."
"I am King Galbatorix's general, the Shade Durza!" he announced. "Flee before my wrath!"
"Well," I answered, "One, with a name like Durza, it's pretty obvious you're a bad guy, since any name starting with a 'G,' a 'D', or a 'Z' is a villain's name. Two, there's not actually a wrath to flee from, if you get my gist."
"His Majesty wants you," Durza said. "And either you will come with me quietly, or I will have to resort to force."
"'Resort to force,'" I repeated. "That's such a popular phrase with you old people. So, tell me, Durza, how are you going to make us go with you? I'll have to remind you that there's a pretty angry dragoness over there, while I'm an annoyed random person who's too tired to go anywhere with anyone. That includes you. Also, I was wondering something. How can you people even remember that guy's name? It's so long. I think it was Gandrayda or Gabriel or something."
Durza scowled. "Enough talk! Now come with me, both of you."
"You're weird," I commented. "First you're telling us to flee before your wrath, and next you're telling us to go with you? I just don't get you old-fashioned villain types sometimes."
Durza scowled some more, then he shouted some random gibberish, slytha or something. My eyelids drooped, and I began to feel sleepy. Saphira collapsed next to me and snored, her eyes closed.
The last thing I saw before I fell to the ground was the Shade standing there, a triumphant and slightly confused smile on his ugly face.