Title: ...it's in debate. Got ideas?

Author: Jaded

Chapter: 4/?

Pairing: Sho/Kei

Rating: PG-15

Warnings: un-beta-ed, language, unusual situations and misuse of objects in some chapters.

Disclaimer: Gackt owns Moon Child right? (I guess that means he own Kei too huh? *wiggles eyebrows*)

Jaded's fore- words: Just because the beginning of this chapter is serious don't have very high expectations for the rest of it. This chapter is a collaborative work between a couple friends and I. It's basically pure crack…scratch that, it's pure marijuana. Expect some crazy shit that just might kill you from laughter and/or fright.

WARNING for this chapter: Michael Jackson, Crack, ooc, and unbetaed . . . OH! and very fucked up sexual themes. If anyone gets offended by weird shit involving inappropriate, sexual objects and/or happenings then turn around . . . that is, unless you have a sense of morbid curiosity.

"Kei!" A familiar voice called from behind the blonde vampire. Kei turned around to see Luka holding a small boy; he couldn't have been more than two, with black hair. Luka was walking towards him with a smile and it was completely genuine.

"Daddy!" The child squealed while reaching out for Kei and giggling. Luka laughed as the brunette boy was practically trying to fly out of his arms. Kei smiled and pulled the wiggling two year-old into his arms dropping a kiss to the top of his head. The child's small arms locked around his neck and he laid his head on Kei's shoulder.

Then everything was fading away and the scene was replaced with Luka and Kei on the beach before the sun rose with the blonde vampire pleading him for the black-haired one to keep living, just like in every dream Kei had ever had.

Kei woke with a gasp, his eyes snapping open to view the ceiling above him. He sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the daybed just as Sho was sitting in the chair next to the bed. Kei sighed and tried to ignore the man sitting there.

"Same dream?" The man with braids asked. Kei shook his head.

"Only at the end. Before that there was a kid and Luka was holding him. He-" Kei faltered and looked up at Sho in confusion. "He called me 'Daddy.'"

Sho opened his mouth to say something when in actuality he had nothing to say so opening his mouth was basically pointless. So he closed it. Long minutes passed and Kei had dropped his head into his hands trying to recall every fading detail of the dream before Sho had actually figured out something to say. By then it was too late because a terrified scream came from David's room.

Kei's head immediately snapped up to exchange a quick glance with Sho before both were flying out of their seats towards the room where the last echoing notes of the sound were coming from.

When they reached the open doorway and looked into the room David was sitting on his bed wrapped in the many layers of his blankets, only his eyes showing, while staring across the room. Kei and Sho followed his frightened gaze only to see a small urn standing against the wall. The two men cautiously approached the shaking boy hidden in a pile of blankets and pillows, wondering why he was panicking over a vase.

As they neared him they began to hear him whispering to himself.

"She's gonna kill me . . . how did I get it? . . . did you know that she's going to kill me? . . . why was it in my backpack!? SHE'S GONNA KILL ME!!!"

David screamed again after that and burrowed even further under all his bed gear so that all that was seen of him was a large lump underneath. Kei carefully sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled the blankets back. Sho was still staring at the urn in confusion.

The blonde vampire found the pinkette curled up in the fetal position on his side with his eyes squeezed shut.

"David," Kei called softly. "What's wrong? Who's going to kill you?"

David immediately flew up into a sitting position and stared at Kei with saucer size eyes. He opened his mouth and was talking a mile a second.

"Okay so, I found the urn in my backpack and see it's my best friend's and she will kill me because it's hers and that's where she keeps her marijuana crops and without her marijuana bad things happen and she acts really weird and if anyone touches her urn she kills you unless you fall in- GET AWAY FROM THERE SHO!!"

The braided man who had been crouching by the urn on the ground and reaching for its lid suddenly stood up and tried to spin around but slipped on one of David's shirts. The pink-haired boy watched with horror as Sho fell backwards as if in slow motion, a surprised look plastered on his face. The closed urn lid slowly opened on its hinges and fell back. Then Sho was falling towards the top. Everything sped up and Sho fell into the opening of the urn, gone a second later. There was the sound of porcelain hitting porcelain and the urn's lid was shut.

There was a second of dead silence.

"Where's Sho!?" Kei yelled standing up and going for the urn. He seemed scared and angry. David immediately jumped up from his bed and blocked his path to the urn.

"He fell into the urn." He calmly told the vampire.

"Fell?" Kei questioned incredulously. "How does a six foot man fall into a vase not even a foot tall?"

"Uh . . . the urn is . . . magical. Did I not mention that before? There's a whole other world in there and I've fallen in there quite a bit. FINALLY SOMEONE BESIDES ME!"

"When will Sho come out?"

" . . . He . . . won't. 'twejustleavehiminthere?"

"WHAT! We're not going to leave Sho in a vase-"

"Urn."

"What?"

"It's an urn. Not a vase. Common misconception."

"Same thing."

"Actually they're not. A vase is used for holding flowers and decorative purposes whereas an urn is for putting a dead person's burned body in, or in this case a whole other world."

"I don't care. I'm going to get Sho."

"You can't. 'sigh' You'll just end up getting lost inside. I'd have to go with you but I really wouldn't like to."

"Too bad. We're going. How do you get in?"

"Open the lid and lean over the top."

Kei frowned but did as he was told and at first nothing happened. Then he was tumbling rapidly through blackness into the urn. When he finally landed it was in a big bowl of salad. He looked up and almost screamed. All around him were giant spiders wearing top hats and bonnets.

Seconds later David landed next to him in the bowl. Kei watched in horror as the biggest, top hat wearing spider lifted up his right feet and placed them on the web underneath, in their direction, and shrank so he was only as big as a super ball. He took another step and was back to being ginormous. It seemed that with every step it took it would change sizes. When he was finally standing on the edge of the bowl staring at David he was small.

The shocked vampire watched as the spider removed his hat and bowed before placing it back onto his head.

"Well howdy doo David!" It exclaimed in a squeaky voice.

"Hi Chicho!" David greeted back enthusiastically. "How're you doin'?"

"Mighty fine, David, mighty fine." The spider, which was called Chicho, responded with.

"You wouldn't happen to have recently seen a man with braids in his hair, would you?" David was questioning while climbing out of the salad bowl, motioning for Kei to do the same, and glancing around as if Sho would just suddenly pop up out of nowhere.

"It just so happens that I have!"

Flashback

Not but an hour and fifteen minutes ago I was out looking for Nancy, Tiddles, and Secksoarjeeseemaen(5) when out of the sky dropped a man and all I could think was "Not another one!" But I had been hoping for another visit from you though so I was excitedly expecting you or Leader-sama to come back and get him out. But before anyone could come and rescue him from the Pond of Curdled Milk, where he had fallen, Mubble Doo(2), that nasty little monkey, ran by and stole his pants just before the Butter-fly(1) swooped down and carried him off, probably as another addition to its collection of adopted "children." Haven't seen the poor soul since.

1) Butter-fly – a large elongated body of a fly attached to multicolored butter sticks as its wings. Adopts anything it believes needs a home and coddles beyond limit.

5) Pronounced Sex-or-gee-see-men/ Nancy, Tiddles, and Secksoarjeeseemaen are Chicho and Karen(Chicho's wife)'s children from oldest to youngest.

2) Mubble Doo Monkey – an average sized dark blue monkey that likes to steal pants and is supposedly married to Devarniker, the sugar tree. Also lives in Devarniker.

End large flashback thingy from Chicho's point of view and whatever

"Well then I guess we have a long way to walk." David commented after he heard Chicho's elaborate (not really) story.

"Yes, Hun," Karen said with honey, looking at David. "Also I've been meaning to ask who your little friend is."

"This is Kei, Karen." David motioned toward the blonde. "He's a vampire."

"That's exciting, now isn't it!" Exclaimed Karen as she clapped her front feet together with a disarming smile of sweetness. "Please David, stay for dinner? Kei, you too?"

Kei was about to decline, thinking of David's eating . . . disorder, the fact that he'd much rather have blood if he were to eat, and Sho trapped pants less with what he thought to be a giant butterfly, but David beat him to accepting. Then the oldest male spider child, Nancy, smacked Kei in the back of the head for his idiocy.

"We're spiders. We may eat food but we drink blood with every meal." Then he was scuttling away, shrinking and growing, to his plate.

Later Kei and David were standing under the family's spider web, waving up at them feeling full and ready to go looking for the lost man. After shouting many thanks David was finally drug away by Kei until the blonde vampire got lost on the prairie and dropped the silent teen onto the ground.

"You can't see anything here!" He exclaimed turning in circles. "I can only see twenty feet in all directions and only hazy shapes and blackness past that! WHY IS THE SUN BLACK!?!?"

"Are you ready to let me lead?" David questioned from where he was sitting cross legged on the ground, examining his fingernails. Kei just huffed and childishly crossed his arms over his chest. Sho must have been rubbing off on him.

David took that as a yes, stood up and brushed the butt of his jeans, took two steps to his left before leaning back and looking up at the sun. He looked at it until his body was bent all the way back in a bridge. Then he looked forward upside-down.

Two seconds later he let his body fall to the ground and pointed above his head.

"We walk that way for fifty meters then take a left into the flavored marijuana crops until we find the river." The pinkette teen stated, staring up at Kei who was staring down at him.

"You figured all that out just doing a backbend?" Kei questioned, an amazed expression on his face.

"No. I did a backbend to pop my back. I just know where the river is and the Butter-fly lives on the other side."

Kei glared at him before offering a hand to help David up.

Twenty minutes later they were facing a very unorganized crop of marijuana. Large and looming as it was David was insisting that they had to go through it. Kei didn't think it would be that good of an idea.

"Just stay close and we'll be fine," the teen said as he took the first step into the forest of dope. Kei followed to his right and when David looked towards the vampire he found a bush instead.

"Goddammit! You stupid bush! You came between us and now he's gonna be lost forever!" David yelled at the stalk, his foot swinging back to kick it.

"Hey yo! It wasn't my fault dawg!" The bush shouted back. "No need to kick meh."

"Raspberry? OHMYGOD! Wassup my homie!! Have you seen Blueberry lately!! That ass owes me some of the best shit!!"

And David completely forgot about Kei and Sho in favor of talking to his bush homies.

With Sho things weren't as grand though. He had been knocked out when he tried to get away from the giant Butter-fly and when he woke up he was alone in a giant nest. But not even ten seconds afterwards he realized his pants were gone.

Something sniffled next to him and he looked down to see a tiny marijuana plant with only a couple leaves and a small blueberry hanging like a tear.

"It stole-ed me from my momma." It sniffled again. Sho looked at it like it would attack him before scooting away.

Then, looking over the edge with every intention to leave, he found a line of six inch tall pickles walking toward the nest. The one in front seemed to be drilling them or something.

"Sound off!" He squeaked.

"Pick-"

"ULL-"

"Luff-"

"A-"

"Lump-"

"A-"

"KUS!"

"ALL TOGETHER NOW!" The first one squeaked again.

"Pickleluffalumpakus!"

Then they were marching straight up the side of the nest, over the edge, and down the inside wall. They circled up when they reached the other side of the nest and immediately dropped to the ground to curl up. Not long after that they were snoring.

In the next five minutes after that creatures of every kind were entering the nest to settle down for what seemed to be the night. By the end Sho was surrounded by the Pickleluffalumpakuses, birds with tupperware bodies, a family of glockenspiels worshipping a guitar with David's name on it, a thick silver chain that hissed at him, and a pink carebear that had decided to sleep in his pants less lap. Then he heard a very frightening sound, the loud "KUHKAHHHH!" of the Butter-fly.

Seconds later it landed above him and reached down into his lap to remove the carebear only to drag him out right afterwards and drop him into a hot spring.

"Kuhkaaahhh!" It cooed while nudging a bar of honey scented soap towards him with a claw, very bird of prey like it was.

Sho hesitated for a second in confusion before quickly stripping off his curdled milk soaked clothes and washing. When the Butter-fly had decided he was clean enough it was nudging him out and wrapping his nude body with a large, blanket sized, fluffy towel. It left soon after and returned with a clean pair of clothes, without the pants, in the exact same style of what he would wear as pajamas to bed. So under the Butter-fly's intense scrutiny Sho dressed, pulling on the boxers and t-shirt he had been given.

When all that was done he was being ushered back to the nest where he found a miniature nest of blankets where he had been sitting before. With a stern shove from the Butter-fly he was scrambling into bed and curling up, trying to fight off sleep to with the soft warmth surrounding him. But then the Butter-fly was dropping an enormous blanket over the nest so it was like sleeping in a giant tent and Sho could not resist the temptation of oblivion any longer.

On the far side of the urn Mubble Doo had entered a very secret lair only known to some but difficult to find even though a large flashing neon sign told the urn world what it was. He easily found the person he was looking for in a freezer hidden in the shadows.

"What do you come for?" A voice called out to Mubble Doo. Mubble Doo, being the intelligent monkey that he was, signed out the question:

"Where have my yellow dildo-shaped bananas been taken?"

The mysterious voice "Hmm"-ed before asking if the monkey had payment for his information. To this Mubble Doo held out Sho's leather pants like an offering. Suddenly a hand shot out of the freezer and took the pants, looking them over before taking them as payment.

"Inside the Wiezstershchnitzlezz's cave hidden below the whirl pool at the river's source of water."

Then Mubble Doo was being dismissed but before he could leave the hidden figure put on the pants it had been given and being Mubble Doo he couldn't help but twitch with the urge to steal the pants. Suddenly he couldn't hold it back anymore and with a mad monkey cackle he stole the pants and ran from the freezer as fast as he could, cackling the whole way.

Kei exhaustedly climbed onto the bank of the river panting and smelling of coffee. You see he hadn't known that the river was actually coffee because the soil that the marijuana crops grew in was coffee grounds so it made the river turn into coffee and now his clothing was completely stained with coffee.

Kei collapsed on the ground once he was all the way out of the river before looking up to see David animatedly talking to a large circle of marijuana plants. Growling in displeasure he heaved his body off the ground and trudged over to David.

"OHMYGOSH DAWG! I'd thought you were gone forever!" David exclaimed, dramatically jumping up and hugging Kei in a crushing embrace. The blonde vampire stumbled back, startled. It was such a strangely cute thing for David to do that he hugged the teen back. Right after his arms wrapped around David though a cackling, dark blue monkey whizzed by wearing a pair of pants on his head with his arms thrown up and scared the crap outta him.

"What was that?" He asked in a rush.

"Mubble Doo." David mumbled sleepily into Kei's coffee soaked shirt. Coffee scent made him tired.

All the marijuana bushes around the two and in the monkey's path cleared away. Kei's eyes followed after Mubble Doo but he only saw a giant tree that looked like one a child would draw.

He carefully set David's half asleep form on the ground before walking up to the tree. Looking up he saw every kind of fruit imaginable. There were grapes, cumquats, apples, oranges, bread fruit, coconuts, mangos, melons, cantaloupe, and every other fruit that existed in the world. He had walked around its trunk once before David stumbled over.

"Don't walk around it three times." He warned before sitting down. Kei didn't hear him or was just ignoring him because he continued to circle. He stopped after his second one and looked at the barely awake pinkette teen.

"What is this?" He asked.

"Dev-'yawn'-arniker, the sugar tree. He's Mubble Doo's wife/husband, supposedly, and the sugar tree."

Kei 'Oh'-ed and walked around the tree once more. Immediately powdered sugar began falling softly from Devarniker's limbs like snow.

"I-'yawn'-told you not to walk around him three times."

"Is this fruit actually fruit?" Kei questioned while pointing to a bundle of grapes.

"Nope. Once plucked it turns into sugar. 'yawn' Hey, throw me a pixie stick." David ordered while pointing to the paper covered things hanging amongst the fruit. Kei grabbed a random one and chucked it at David.

" . . . feet?" The pinkette asked himself as he read the label on the pixie stick. Then he shrugged, not caring if it did taste like them, and tore it open to eat. When he was done he threw the empty wrapper onto the ground where it was instantaneously consumed.

"When does it stop . . . snowing?" Kei inquired after getting annoyed with the powdered sugar sticking to his wet clothes and making him sticky.

"When it starts raining." Was David's almost smartass response.

"When will it start to rain?" Kei tried again walking around the tree in the opposite direction. The snow stopped and skittles began falling from Devarniker. At the same time a rainbow shot over the extremely wide coffee river as a kind of bridge. David jumped up when he saw this and grabbed Kei.

"This is our chance!" He exclaimed, running for the rainbow.

"For what?"

"To cross."

If Kei hadn't seen so many odd things since he entered this "urn" than he would have thought the bridge was unstable but knowing this world it would be just as stable as if it were concrete.

They had only made it halfway over before a strange war cry was sounded from behind them. Both vampiric creatures turned around to find the Lucky Charms leprechaun leading a battalion of rabid carebears in every color imaginable and not.

"Run!" David screamed and took off in the opposite direction. Kei had no choice but to follow. They both feared being sacrificed to whatever god if caught by the battalion of carebears.

When Sho woke up that . . . morning the blanket had been removed from its place over the nest and the moon was just setting. There was a click and the black sun was back on, providing its bright but strangely dim light.

Carefully, Sho sat up and glanced around, finding everything asleep. So with every intention of escaping again he ran as fast as he could from the nest, careful not to make a sound. And guess what? He successfully made it away! But then he was lost.

"Are you feeling sleepy?" David randomly asked after a whole night of walking through marijuana crops. They were finally thinning out though.

"No, why?" Kei asked before yawning.

"Because we're walking underneath the Snoozing Mitzsterfiffles," the pinkette teen explained while pointing upward.

The blonde vampire looked above and found jungle-like tree branches intertwined overhead. And clinging to them amongst the large heart-shaped leaves were soccer ball-size pink, purple, and blue fuzz balls with circular faerie wings attached to the top of them. Big eyelids a shade darker than their bodies were closed contentedly. Various snores were softly heard from them.

"Mitzstefiffles?" Kei questioned with a hint of nervousness.

"It's okay. They're harmless but will make you extremely sleepy so that you sleep like you're dead for several more hours than you normally would. In fact they make quite cuddly bed partners when you're having trouble sleeping. Send you right off to dream land. And they're easier to take care of than a cat. All you have to do is feed them the sour juice-nuts of the Bong-Bong Tree."

Kei gave David a strange look as the teen bent over and scratched behind one of the Mitzsterfiffles' round ears. The thing began purring happily.

"I've always wanted one. There's this special one that's actually tie-dye colored and it took a liking to me as soon as we met. It's just simply adorable."

Kei rolled his eyes and kept walking but when he didn't hear David behind him he had to turn around to see what had happened to him.

His face immediately fell into one of exasperation when he saw the boy curled up on the ground snoozing away with a blue Mitzsterfiffle. The Mitzsterfiffle mewled softly in David's arms and snuggled closer. Kei face palmed.

He walked over to David intending on picking him up and carrying him if he had to but a pink Mitzsterfiffle fell right onto his head and its fuzziness knocked him right out.

About two miles away from where Kei and David were snuggled up with the Mitzsterfiffles Sho had walked onto a large circular patch of fake grass that changed colors with every step he took. (3) In the middle of this small field was a sign standing crookedly in a circle of sand. On top of it were eight egg rolls and a single sub-sandwich placed standing up like menorah candles.

"No Loitering!" Read the sign in ominous orange letters.

Sho, for some reason, decided to disobey the sign, which was not a very good idea when in the urn. Foreboding music began to play in the background, the only sound among the silence.

Ferris wheels and bumper cars are fun

But those rides just aren't for everyone

Lost my tickets Imma have a run

In the maze~

(Whoooo!)

The sand began spinning underneath Sho's feet and he was suddenly sucked into a tunnel hidden under the grass. It was slippery and slide-like. Light at the end of the tunnel was what awaited Sho and then he was thrown out into a cave filled with romantic music. Suddenly Michael Jackson walked out of a side room wearing his "Thriller" costume.

"Hey there sexy." He tried to say sexily. Sho screamed bloody murder and tried to claw his way back up the slide.

3) It's mood grass. Changes color when you walk on it.

"I can't believe we slept for a whole day because of those things." Kei ranted angrily as him and David walked again at night. In front of him David was munching on cheese from the moon that followed them in the black, starless sky.

"Don't blame the Mitzsterfiffles. Neither of us had been getting very good sleep before that. You're more immune to their effects if you've been getting good rest."

David was pouting still because he had to leave his friend who had found them while they were sleeping. He really wanted that tie-dye Mitzsterfiffle.

"We don't have to walk if we don't want to, ya know." David said while suddenly stopping dead in his tracks while still bearing a look of indifference.

"Really?" Kei asked with interest. Walking sure was slow.

"Yeah but we have to get a special key from Los before we can stop walking."

Kei had known there was a catch.

"And where is this 'Los?'"

"Right there." David said, pointing ahead of him where a man with a white body and black face was walking by. He was dressed in only boxers and a trench coat made out of a shower curtain with rubber duckies and pink bubbles on it. His hair was in braids and a black snake-tail like tentacle curved from his upper back, over his head to hold a lantern in front of him. Behind him trailed empty ice-cream boxes, the end somewhere lost in the blackness beyond.

"Los!" David called as he ran up to the man. "What are you doing out of your freezer?"

"Hmm?" Los hummed, a little slow on the uptake. "Mubble Doo stole the pants he had given me as payment so I need to find him."

"Ooohkay~ So Los can I have the key to the Lickotehcocomobile?"

"What do you have to give me?"

"Uhhhh . . . " David thought for a second before pulling out an ice-cream cone from nowhere. "Marijuana flavored ice-cream."

"Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" Los squealed as he jumped for the cone. David held it out of reach.

"The key first Los."

"Yes yes yes! Here it is!" The man gave David a blue dildo attached to a keychain before getting handed his precious ice-cream cone. Seconds later he was running off screaming like a schoolgirl, the boxes behind him rattling along.

"What is that?" Kei asked with suspicion while eyeing the penis shaped piece of rubber.

"A key." Was David's simple response as he leaned out in front of him, looking both ways. Then the pinkette was raising up his hand and giving their surroundings the birdie.

"What are you doing?"

"Hailing the Lickotehcocomobile. It should be showing up soon."

Kei didn't care enough this time to give David a strange look or roll his eyes. But strangely enough a cardboard-like cutout made of chocolate in likeness of a car pulled up next to David, its licorice wheels bouncing along happily.

David opened the door and slid so that he was sitting in front of the steering wheel. The pinkette teen handed a licorice rope to Kei once the blonde vampire was settled in.

"Buckle up." Was all he said while tying the rope around his waist and feeding the excess licorice to a mouth that had suddenly appeared between the two passengers. Kei was quick to follow and had just barely finished feeding the mouth before David inserted the key into the ignition, a vagina. Split second later they were speeding off.

"There's only five speeds with this thing." David explained as he drove the Lickotehcocomobile. "Fast, faster, Solar system on Crack-like Marijuana, Caffeine, and snail. So hold on."

The next five minutes of Kei's life were the scariest of his life. Almost nothing could compare because Sho's insane driving could never compare to this kind of driving.

Sho was terrified. Insanely so. Michael Jackson was approaching him, his long, white, disgusting fingers curling like claws in his direction. The way the freak was looking at him made him feel violated alone. The poor six-foot tall man could have cried at the predicament he was in.

But then another set of hands, less doom impending and smaller, grabbed at the shoulders of his shirt and he was pulled safely up the slide, out of Michael Jackson's clutches. He heard the banshee scream of MJ echo up the slide and almost blow his eardrums as he was pulled farther and farther away from the light at the end of the death sentence tunnel.

Sho almost cried with relief when they were back on the mood grass.

"Che." The person who had pulled him from Michael Jackson's grasp scoffed. Sho turned around to find a preteen looking girl wearing a red, jaggedly cut skirt and matching spaghetti strap belly shirt. Her hair fell to her shoulders, straight and neat, and around her eyes was dark red eyeliner. Fluttering softly behind her were see-through wings.

"You're such a crybaby. Michael Jackson is a lot like Chuckie," she jerked a finger over her shoulder where behind her a doll with red hair was attempting and failing at hiding behind a bush. "Basically harmless after you dropkick him."

"Who are you?" Sho inquired feeling just a little freaked out by the girl.

"The Urn Faerie! Duh."

"So what's your name?"

"I have one but only a couple people know it. One of them not being you!" She smiled brightly only serving the purpose to make her look like a serial killer. "You should meet my Sheedallamasaurus!"

The Urn Faerie grabbed Sho's hand and ran off in the direction of Chuckie, dragging the braided man behind. They ran past the demonic doll and around a corner of a triangular podium to see a very odd sight.

Grazing on top hats growing like daisies was a very strange creature. The strangest Sho had seen yet. It had a Llama's head and neck that was attached to a very long body that was eastern dragon-like but instead of being covered in scales it was covered in fluffy yellow wool. Its tail was scaled though, as were its carnivorous dinosaur like legs. Standing on its back was a green chicken with three legs and three eyes.

"Oh and that's Freddward, my pet chicken." She said as the only explanation for the mutated bird. Freddward turned his head in Sho's direction and roared like a dinosaur, making Sho jump. When he was done he resumed staring at the Sheedallamasaurus' neck.

"He likes you."

"We're gonna crash!" Kei shouted as the Lickotehcocomobile hit its fastest speed, Caffeine. Right ahead of them was a large looming creature covered in yellow wool.

"No we're not!" David shouted back and suddenly the car slowed down so quickly that Kei and David both were flung forward. "See. I told you so."

Now that the Lickotehcocomobile was only moving at a snail's pace David untied his belt, which was quickly slurped up by the mouth hovering next to him. Then the pinkette was jumping out of the thin-air seat onto the ground. Kei hurried to follow before the car sped up again, except he had to use the door.

"That's the Sheedallamasaurus. There's only one in the urn and it's owned by the Urn Faerie, which means she should be close by." David explained as he pointed at the animal.

"David!!" A girl's voice squealed and a girl dressed in red appeared around the Sheedallamasaurus.

"Urn Faerie!!!" David squealed and the two were jumping into each other's arms.

"Kei!" Sho cried as he threw himself at the vampire. Tears leaked from the corners of his eyes.

"Sho?" Kei questioned as he placed one of his hands on top of the other man's head.

"It was all so scary Kei." Sho sobbed into Kei's coffee stained shirt.

"Well," David said, breaking the emotional moment. "Lets go home. I'm tired of this place."

The Urn Faerie nodded, understanding that being from the mortal world David would eventually get annoyed by the urn world.

"Get on the Sheedallamasaurus everybody! We're gonna blow this Popsicle stand!"

Minutes later all were on the Sheedallamasaurus as it ran gracefully along the ground so that it was more like flying than riding something that ran. Less than ten minutes later the Sheedallamasaurus was stopping at some random wall where there was an erection sticking out of the wall next to a pair of boobs which were next to a set of closed doors.

The Urn Faerie walked up and pulled the cock down like a lever and one of the boobs next to it sprayed milk all over Kei. The Urn Faerie laughed.

"Noob."

"Now we wait," David stated as a chair popped up from the ground for him to sit in.

Suddenly everyone that Sho, Kei, and David had met in the urn showed up and led by the Urn Faerie they performed an improv musical. The spiders tap danced, the Mitzsterfiffles bounced around like super balls to 19-2000 (Soulchild Remix) from Gorillaz, the carebears did a song from Cats, the Sheedallamasaurus square danced with a giant Koi fish, and everyone else just kinda made up everything as they went.

It really helped to pass the time while waiting for the urnavator to ding and alert everyone that it was there. When that did happen the musical ended with a bang from Michael Jackson and some Thriller moves before the carebears carried him off to sacrifice him to their god, the giant Koi fish.

There were tearful goodbyes between David and the Urn Faerie, Freddward the chicken even jumped into Sho's arms to say goodbye by trying to peck his eye out. Kei shooed him away.

Then right as everyone was boarding the urnavator the tie-dye Mitzsterfiffle that David loved oh-so much climbed into his arms with big, pleading eyes. David turned to Sho and Kei with the same eyes. Kei tried to look stern and Sho looked almost afraid of the Mitzsterfiffle. In the end David got to keep him. The Urn Faerie even gave him a giant bag of sour juice-nuts from the Bong-Bong Tree to feed the little guy for months.

The end came and soon the three males were being tossed out of the urn (Literally, because the urnavator actually only goes to the rim of the urn and a giant spring inside throws you out of the urn.) and back into David's room. The Mitzsterfiffle, sensing how tired they all were begun to work its charms and soon everyone was in their beds passed out after several long urn-days. Really it had only been eighteen hours since they fell in.

David named the Mitzsterfiffle Bob (4). Bob liked it.

4) Actually his name was Bob Lobosoffolus Mitzsterfiffle, but Bob for short. XD

Jaded's after words: I told you! My friends and I must have been on something when we came up with this. I was cracking up the whole time I was writing it. Downside of this though is that now I really want a Mitzsterfiffle. :'( Also Freddward scares me.

Also I was going to post this the same time as my other chapter for my other fic but...