Homestuck Therapy Chapter 43: Romantic Things Were Discussed, a homestuck fanfic

I really wish this site didn't cut out things like symbols, links, multiple punctuation and really long strings of letters.

So now Jessica does the first massive step of editing, so you can see a bit of her in that. Rather than totally cut out an irrelevant conversation (or just leave it in if it's mildly amusing and risk audience annoyance for the length), she seems to prefer paraphrasing. I find it amusing. :P

There isn't a whole lot to talk about here though. I discovered something called "CircusStuck" which was a project that didn't really take off, and we speculated on whether or not Jake was dead the last few updates, which wasn't a question we had to dwell on for long anyway. Among other discussions of course, but there isn't really a whole lot of depth to this one. Welp. We can't research horoscopes and Greek mythology every day.

KALYN

.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=0qlfeXnIxn4

This is dramatic[Homestuck] The Sufferer's Final Sermon

EMILY

yes

quite

indubitably

JESSICA

hmmmmm, I...kinda feel like all the "fucks" he gave took away from it

but it was great, I liked it

KALYN

is that sermon given somewhere in Homestuck though? Because I'm seeing a lot of videos abou tit

JESSICA

and the problem with these things is that they suddenly become headcanon for me XD

KALYN

about it*

lol

KALYN

no, try watching one of the other videos about it and see if it says the exact same thing

I think this sermon is canon, because it sounded really familiar

JESSICA

hmmm

might be a good time to go on the hunt... but after I catch of on LoK!

(or, I could not be stupid, and say Avatar)

MORGAN

ok, you know what, i haven't read any of this yet... but i'm making a comment.

I wonder if Karkat's ancestor was a Seer when he was in the session.

because he had memories, he knew things

which is why he went around preaching

and rose is a Seer, and in the alphaverse, she had visions and was able to write about things because of them

furthermore, if this is the case, I think LE may have tried to take over AlphaAlternia maybe? I mean, isn't that the bargain for scratching a session, or was that unique to the kids'?

JESSICA

Doc Scratch had a strong presence in AlphaAlternia

And Doc Scratch=LE in the rough

It would also make sense if The Sufferer was a Seer

I've always wondered what each of them were

JESSICA

Avatar! Legend of Korra! When you get the chance! Watch it! STAT!

MORGAN

nah

JESSICA

MORGAN

you're being contradictory

"when you get the chance! STAT!"

JESSICA

(i know )

MORGAN

gotta go

get ice cream

and then

have a smoothie party with the guys downstairs at Pcafe

JESSICA

contemplate how sexy fire benders are?

sounds good to me

Have fun though

MORGAN

i saw the first episode

…

EMILY

new homestuck?

let's not forget the ba-ness of rose!

JESSICA

Ahaha, that was such a great update (other than Hussie's apparent hatred of Guy Fieri. But then, he doesn't like Olive Garden either.)

JESSICA

Homestuck update

GCat is not infallible? What?

The Summoner's powers are pretty strong. She's got GCat and Terezi's ancestor's dragon.

Also, what's Aradia's power? levetation?

JESSICA

JAKE'S DEAD D:

GT: Yeah i know the feeling.

GT: Wait...

TT: What?

GT: Dirk didnt you tell me at some point that you did find evidence the witch killed them?

TT: As of now? No.

GT: Are you sure? I SWEAR i remember you saying something about that.

TT: How could I have said anything like that before today? This was obviously the first time I mentioned any of this.

GT: Oh.

GT: I am just having the NUTTIEST deja vu thing going on now. I feel weird.

TT: ...

GT: I guess i am mistaken. Never mind

MORGAN

OR HE'S DREAMING, YOU DON'T KNOW!

*actually, you know what... you're probably right*

*he's probably dead*

JESSICA

HE COULD BE DEAD D''''''X

MORGAN

cause many things have been pointing to this

JESSICA

Yup

MORGAN

BUT

"Hope Survives!"

JESSICA

Doesn't mean it can't die first

MORGAN

ooh, yeah i know, but anyway

kalyn just said that, you know, could still be a dream bubble

but... jake is still unconscious... but is he dead or just knocked out?

honestly at this point, it could be either way

JESSICA

Yeah, i figured the dream bubble thing. THat's why I said he was dead

MORGAN

yeah, but that could also just mean that he's dreaming

like when rose knocked dave out when they were on the meteor

thing

derse

whatever

JESSICA

Oooh, yeah, I see what you mean

I think, wait

K, so, he had the dark thought bubble thing like John and Dave (right? I remember John's experience better), but they didn't relive memories, did they?

MORGAN

yeah... they did

JESSICA

Oh...k

MORGAN

that's always the first thing that happens in dream bubbles

JESSICA

Yeah, but ... yeah

MORGAN

they relive some memory, almost like an ice breaker, before one of them has dejavu, and then the other is all, oh yeah!

and then, either that other person and they have a conversation about death or something, or a different person who was posing as the other convo partner talks to the dejavu feeler.

JESSICA

Yeah, I knew that, I just forgot that was what happened to John and Dave

All I could think of was John meeting with the ancestor troll

And romantic things were discussed. Particularly semi-humping. (I only took it out because it took up more than 10 pages and had absolutely nothing to do with Homestuck.) [LAWL WHAT JESSICA]

KALYN

Aradia's power was there? I only saw Vriska, Tavros and Sollux... Did she have ALL the powers?

(Sorry, I'm responding to way back here.)

Also, it is possible that Jake is still alive, but I'm pretty sure he's been dead the whole time, since Jane entered the medium. Because of his lantern being snuffed and the prophecies.

But if it weren't for that, I would probably just say he's been knocked out.

And.. yeah

Also. Dirk needs to fulfill that movie poster prophecy, goddamnit.

JESSICA

At the very least she had Vriska, Tavros and Aradia (that I saw). I'm sure Sollux's was in there. Wait, that was her arm, wasn't it? Aradia's symbol flashed with the Vriska's and Tav's

Also, in today's update (which I haven't finished, and I'm going soley off the picture), I think he is going to meet up with Aranea at the very least. Maybe Terezi as well. When we left those two they were going up a tree-vine thing, and that vine thing has entered Jake's room (or I assume so. It looks to be the same color)

JESSICA

So, yeah, back to reading

lol "Pages really are a slow burning class."

Interesting: "Dream bubbles don't always need to be shared by dreamers or dead people. You can go to sleep and wake up in one alone, reliving an old memory"

So, since it is a dream bubble, could he have affected what he said at the beginning but not remember that wasn't supposed to be how it went (great syntax! )

MORGAN

he's not dead

JESSICA

When he thought Dirk was going to confess something other than being from the future, and Jake thought he was going to confess something else. Could that (I KNOW HE'S NOT DEAD) have been him using what he knows now? Like in a normal memory, only he's reliving it.

"i tumbled off the doohickey" I wonder if that's a technical term, lol

Hopy shit, things just got deep! "GT: Its like you are surrounding me from all sides with imitations of yourself but never the REAL YOU!"

I love the way Jake talks, have I mentioned that before?

JESSICA

Again, interesting: "TT: Pages have a lot of untapped potential.

TT: That's practically all there is to the class, actually.

TT: But when they eventually find it, look out.

TT: And the ones who deal in hope? Shit, man.

TT: I'm scared of you already, and I'm not even real"

JESSICA

I wonder what it is they can actually do?

(bluh, no thoughts forming, too tired x.x that's it from me for tonight, i guess...got homework to do too)

JESSICA

Ok, random note. "Modern Western European langages ar written in the Roman alpahebt because Western Europeans were converted to Christianigy from Rome." THE FUCK DOES CHRISTIANITY HAVE TO DO WITH ALPHABETS? Because the Bible was printed with the Roman alphabet? Is that your reasoning? Why couldn't they just say "because Rome conquered them. All of them. Because they were bastards."

JESSICA

(that is /geography/ homework, btw)

JESSICA

teehee, quoting movies

"GT: SO THAT WAS THE PLAN ALL ALONG?

GT: TO GIVE ME A BONER?

TT: And you

TT: ...

TT: Got one."

JESSICA

loved this last update XD

EMILY

calm down

i'm reading it

MORGAN

omigod lawl

just lawl

i can't

lost ability to can

just all gone

EMILY

STOP

I'M NOT DONE YET

MORGAN

i haven't even spoiled anything

EMILY

ok yes

that was wonderful

MORGAN

i agree

EMILY

just excellence

MORGAN

indeed

JESSICA

toldja it was good

MORGAN

teeheeheehee you guys, the update today is adorable and funny

It's with Jack, and I just love how he narrates Jack.

JESSICA

Sadly, creeping attempts fail because she doesn't look at me. But I pretty much make all of those faces.

I'll read the update when I get home

EMILY

half of those were from yesterday

MORGAN

yeah well, I didn't have time yesterday, so

MORGAN

.com/post/22197093613/of-all-the-people-who-could-possibly-come-knocking

THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS OMG I LOVE HOW SUPERSTUCK INCORPORATES THE UPDATES HOLY SHIT OMFG

JESSICA

Oh no. I already know where this is going D: haven't even started reading the update. Eventually he's going to get out, he's going to find magical elves who steal children and carve incantations onto their skins, and a unicorn. He's gonna accidently harpoon one of his buddies and, in a desperate attempt to escape, will just shoot it. But he can't live with what he did. It's too terrible! He'll take his gun that he acquired earlier on and shoot himself.

JESSICA

Also, a pumpkin will mysteriously disappear

this is exactlyl like Jailbreak (at least the beginning)

(Which you should read jailbreak, it's pretty short)

(so's bardquest)

THE KEY IS A GUN! D: (i'm just calling it when it says "there is no key in this room")

aw, damn

JESSICA

ehehehe "Who the hell needs a trusty knife when you are this resourceful? Screw knives!

You take it back, you can't stay mad at knives"

I agree, Morgan. The way he narrates Jack is great

JESSICA

And, yeah, Superstuck will incorporate the updates if they make sense. Like, if I remember correctly, Dirk's affections toward Jake became even more obvious after it was revealed as canon. It was no longer the stuff of dirty, slash ficlets.

MORGAN

hahahaha yeah

JESSICA

Gah, poor Jake

just read Superstuck

x.x

(some time later)

KALYN

I taught my media history teacher what shipping is and also Homestuck, which she now wants to check out

JESSICA

hahahahaha

KALYN

('cept she called it "Homestruck" lol)

JESSICA

I should show her that Master Yorgi video XD

DO NOT READ A WEBCOMIC CALLED HOMESTUCK!

KALYN

oh the don't read Homestuck one?

haha

JESSICA

yeah

so true though

I have sold my soul to Hussie and he will forever be able to twirl me around his finger

KALYN

.com/watch?v=2aJqxFbVl7I

THIS[S] CircusStuck [P]

JESSICA

hold up, taking a test

i'll watch it afterward

KALYN

.com/watch?v=O12WvCj_jqU

K[S] CircusStuck [P2]

KALYN

.com/watch?v=HDMzJjiSFW4

But then this is what it became. Totally absurd [EP1]

KALYN

Welp. At least Eridan's character is even more dimensional than usual.

KALYN

.com/

There's a tumblr for it though, so I'll just peruse this...Circus Stuck

JESSICA

yeah

i don't think i'm going to take another class online .

KALYN

fuck someone broke tumblr

was there something important happening in a fandom tonight?

FUCK

JESSICA

I haven't a clue

KALYN

whyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

JESSICA

I DON'T KNOW!

KALYN

I was going through that circusstuck blog!

JESSICA

You'll just have to either wait until tomorrow, or until much later tonight

them's the breaks, sweetheart

KALYN

so I'm complaining on facebook about it

also: lawl at the Homestuck updates

JESSICA

Is it going to be a tl;dr status?

KALYN

it's definitely not

just three words

there's already 10 comments on it

and three likes

JESSICA

...

KALYN

11 comments

JESSICA

i'm gonna have to get in on this shit

13 now, btw

KALYN

yeah lol

EMILY

holy shit guys

i have to read all this

KALYN

TUMBLR BROOOOOKE

JESSICA

Hopy shit Emily

EMILY

how did tumblr break?

KALYN

I don't know!

I want to know what fandom is behind this bullshit!

JESSICA

War of Thrones

or whatever

KALYN

wait

really?

you knew who was behind this and you didn't tell me?

JESSICA

HOW WOULD I KNOW?

KALYN

lol*

OTL

JESSICA

because I'm a fucking tease

always

EMILY

i'm really enjoying this chef boyardee

JESSICA

that is my default setting

EMILY

it's just pure deliciousness

twenty pages later

JESSICA

lol, good going Jack!

KALYN

EMILY

did you guys switch to homestuck?

JESSICA

momentarily

unless you have more to add

EMILY

so...

uhhh

JESSICA

such as the symbolism behind canine fancy reading

EMILY

dog calendar

couldn't at least be porn?

JESSICA

bowow chick bow

*chicka

EMILY

yeah

EMILY

dailygrace and joe moses (starkid)

holy

shit

just

holy

shit

KALYN

JESSICA

I think Emily's brain is broken

EMILY

just

wow

KALYN

now you know how I feel about Jay Park being in Nigahiga's bromance video...

EMILY

haha

i still love that video

but holy shit

fandom combining

this needs to happen often

can starkid make a kpop play

or some of that shit

because then i will cry/die

JESSICA

They could make the coolest series of plays: Homestuck

2 Acts per play

EMILY

HOLY SHIT YES

THAT SHOULD HAPPEN

or k*jem could have a homestuck song

JESSICA

how would that even go?

maybe a love song

EMILY

it could at least be homestuck inspired

JESSICA

with ALL the quadrants!

and ALL the canon ships!

EMILY

yeaaaaaas

my love for you is so red you don't even know yo

we're so black i can't even see straight

(i'm trying to think of my rap)

JESSICA

lol

…

EMILY

someone just complained on tumblr about a non-canon shipping

seriously?

like, they were talking about how much they don't like sirius/remus because sirius isn't gay and remus/tonks were married and shit

KALYN

haha whatever

shippers gonna ship

JESSICA

how do they know Sirius isn't gay?

EMILY

DUH DUH DUUUUUUUUUUUH

KALYN

true dat

lawl Emily

EMILY

biches

JESSICA

Dumbledore was gay and there wasn't really anything that pointed to that

SO SLOW TYPING, FACEBOOK LAGGING!

EMILY

boo ya

JESSICA

but, yeah

Remus could have been bi

EMILY

but it really annoys me when i see starkid things on just harry potter stuff

or people are like OH HEY OMG IT'S BATMAN

JESSICA

or...Tonks could have shaped herself into a man? ...

KALYN

EMILY

ij?

EMILY

ih?

but yeah

KALYN

can't see my keyboard

EMILY

that annoys me

you don't like batman you like bman

JESSICA

HOMESKEYS!

EMILY

BACKLIGHTED KEYBOARD

JESSICA

HOME ROW!

EMILY

FUCK YEAH

JESSICA

bumps on J and F

EMILY

LOVE MY KEYBOARD

JESSICA

AH!

FUCK YEAH! *

I'm gettin' off now

EMILY

KALYN

asshole!

JESSICA

facebook is being too laggy, my computer is gettin' kinda hot, and I wanna read

KALYN

fine

JESSICA

LOVE YOU!

KALYN

yeah I should go to sleep too, I have shit to do in the morning, and all day, it's gonna be long

EMILY

i want papa johns pizza

JESSICA

Love you always!

EMILY

stupid ad

KALYN

Love ya

'll

EMILY

i won't do shit until 2

you leaving too?

KALYN

^usually how my day goes

EMILY

asshole

i have to go to work then

KALYN

I'll see if I can stay up longer, hang on

EMILY

yay!

wait

uhh

KALYN

ok yeah I'm just gonna be a few minutes

EMILY

yay!

sup?

i so gonna hump your ass in that airport

KALYN

you better make onlookers extremely uncomfortable with the level of humping you'll be doing on my ass.

EMILY

yes

oh yes

poor little kids

they will witness my humping

KALYN

lol

brb bathroom

EMILY

they will learn the ways of the world from my humping

KALYN

an update on that circusstuck shit I don't think anyone watched: after perusing the tumblr for it, I've learned that that actual "episode" is pretty much the SBaHJ of this whole CircusStuck thing, and they haven't started the production of serious shit yet

so it's not just a big epic disappointment

EMILY

i was gonna read all that shit when ya'll stopped talking

cause things dumb

KALYN

EMILY

so...yeah

…

JESSICA

Ladies, by the way, I am going out of town this weekend (leaving tomorrow), so, I won't be able to see you until Monday

Which really sucks

You might even say it sucks balls

JESSICA

I think that would be how not cool it is, but it is an obligation I cannot get out of (and when I mentioned that I might not go, Mom gave me such a guilt trip, like, hard core, Jewish mom guilt trip)

I just wanted you guys to know (particularly Morgan and Kalyn, since I haven't seen you guys IN FOREVER!)

JESSICA

I KNOW WHY I'VE BEEN BEING SO SNARKY LATELY!

It's the profile picture!

(I realize that "being" is superfluous and I should probably take it out...If I could edit these messages...like you can with skype...myup)

(so, take it out wihth your imagination. Or take a sniper rifle, that would work too)

MORGAN

hahahaha but also sad

JESSICA

Yeah, I know. On the bright side! We're leaving a day earlier than I thought, but we're also coming HOME a day earlier I'll be back Saturday night, soooooo Sunday I'll be home! If you wanna hit me up. Just sayin'

KALYN

Totes

…

JESSICA

anyway, Jack is such a good samaritan. Prospit should people like him serving the greater good.

*should have more people