Chapter 7 - Horizon Debrief
Eternity's Struggle

Eternity's Struggle, the sequel to A Glimpse of Eternity, is a complication of short stories, letters and life-snapshots that are sprinkled throughout the events of Mass Effect 2 following both Commander Kiara Shepard and Kaidan Alenko. While they're in chronological order, its not the complete storyline of the whole of Shepard's missions as she prepares, then faces, the Collectors. There will be SPOILERS. Please read the Eternity Series - Disclaimer for more general information.

Disclaimer: I own only the parts of the individual personality of Commander Kiara Shepard I have developed inspired by the Commander Shepard in the gameplay. I do not own, nor hold any rights, to any of the characters, dialogue, storylines or any part in or of the "Mass Effect" game series. I want to thank Drew Karpyshyn and his staff of amazing writers, animators and voice actors. These are for fan enjoyment only and no money had been made on these stories.

Even when she returned to the ship, she didn't have time to sneak off to her quarters. The Illusive Man wanted his report.

"Shepard. Good work on the Horizon. Hopefully, the Collectors will think twice before attacking another colony," he said, his voice as grating and annoying as ever to her ears. A voice full of ego and pomp. It annoyed her at the best of times but now, with what had happened on Horizon, she could stand it even less.

"It's not a victory. We interrupted the Collectors, but they still abducted half the colony," she said, uncaring if the anger and annoyance of her voice bled through.

"That's better than an entire colony, and more than we've accomplished since the abductions began. The Collectors will be more careful now, but I think we can find another way to lure them in."

Unease settled in her at his choice of words, suspicion filling triggering her instincts. "Kaidan said the Alliance got a tip about me and Cerberus. Was that you?" she asked sharply.

He took a deep drag of the disgusting cigarette of his, a smug look on his face, "I may have let it slip that you were alive. And with Cerberus."

Anger flared more inside her, "You risked the lives of my friend, my crew and that entire colony? Just to lure the Collectors there?"

"A calculated risk. I suspected the Collectors were looking for you, or people connected to you. Now I know for certain. I told you I wouldn't sit and wait while the Reapers and Collectors gather strength. Besides, they would've hit another colony eventually. And without a way to predict which one, they would've abducted everyone," the Illusive Man responded, a lilt of annoyance touching his tone. She would have missed it, it was so well controlled, but from the start she was cautious with him. She didn't trust him, and that made her more watchful of his every move and every inflection.

She detested having to work with him as she detested this whole situation. She was done with all of it, and she was especially done playing games, "We have to make sure they don't abduct anyone else."

"I want the Collectors stopped for that very reason. That's why we're doing this, Shepard. I'm devoting all resources to finding a way through the Omega 4 relay. We have to hit them where they live. Your team will need to be strong...as will their resolve. There's no looking back. The same goes for you. Can I assume you've put your past relationships behind you?" he asked.

Anger flared once more in her at the nerve he had to ask her such a question. "None of your damn business," she said sharply, not making any effort to hide her disdain.

"If it affects the mission, better you should leave it behind," he put out his cigarette in the tray on his armrest. "Shepard. Once we find a way through the Omega 4 relay to the Collector homeworld...there's no guarantee you'll return. To have any hope of surviving, you - and your entire team - must be fully committed to this."

She clenched her teeth as they ground together, the rumblings of her anger pulsing through her entire body. "Let me worry about them. You just find us a way to the Collector homeworld.

He looked at her, his eerie and all too bright blue eyes boring into her even through the vid connection, "I just want to be up front about your odds. You'll need everyone at their best. I've forwarded three more dossiers. Keep building your team while I find a way through the relay. And be careful, Shepard. The Collectors will be watching you."

Just like that, with a push of a button, the comm link was ended and the field around her lowered. Exhaustion filled every inch of her as she took a breath, the day catching up with her. All she wanted to do was retreat to her quarters and let the day be done.

Turning, she saw Jacob by the door and she met his eyes with her own. His arms were crossed in front of him as he leaned against the railing, "I guess we're really gonna do it. Hit the Omega 4 relay, take the fight to the Collectors in person. Looking forward to the action. After seeing what those bastards did on Horizon though, makes you think."

She stepped off the platform and walked towards him, her Commander persona taking over as she buried her exhaustion, and emotions, deep below the mask, "They're powerful, but we've got a few tricks for them. If anyone can stop them, we can."

"No argument there, Commander. Horizon just made it hit home. What we're doing, what we're up against," he said, his demeanor grew heavy, "Gonna go take care of a little unfinished business. I imagine everyone else is, too - getting some closure, you know?" With that, he turned and walked out, the door shutting behind him.

She looked down, closing her eyes a moment as she took a breath as she left the room. His words had touched close to home, too close to home, and her resolved around her Commander mask was failing. She made for the elevator with all haste ignoring everyone she walked past. She even ignored Kelly as she informed her of messages she'd received as she made to the lift and set it to take her up to her cabin.

Soon after, the doors of her quarters shut behind her and she leaned against the door, locking it with the security codes.

Walking, though it felt more like drudging through sludge, she made it to her desk. Seeing the picture frame of Kaidan there on the surface, she felt the shreds of her mask fall away as the weight of the day. Everything that happened hit her with impossible force.

Tear filled her eyes as she crumpled to the ground, resting her head against the side of her desk. With her mask crumbling away came the falling of the dam she had built to hold in the ache of her heart. Without a breath, the pain came flooding back in and threatened to take her under as she closed her eyes.

Kaidan was gone. She'd lost him.

All the hopes and dreams, the fighting to find him and the struggling to take it all on, came crashing down. The pain she had felt on Horizon as he said goodbye brought it all to her and consumed every inch of her. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't see.

Pain turned to anger. Anger at Cerberus and wishing they had left her dead. Anger at Kaidan for not trusting her. He should have known her better than he acted and should have known she was fighting for the right side - that she was fighting her way to defeat the Reapers. She felt anger at herself for not fighting harder for him, for not saying the right things and maybe convincing him to join her.

Her anger then turned towards the Reapers and it settled deep within her heart, quickly taking root.

The Reapers. It was because of them she had lost everything. Her life. Her world they way she knew it...her love. They would pay and pay dearly, as would anyone who helped them. Already she had a deep desire to want the end of the Reapers for the sake of the Galaxy but now, that desire for their end had made its home in her heart as anger. Now, they had made it personal.

She would end them. She would prove to the Galaxy they were the threat all along. She would never work for Cerberus and when the Reapers were dead, she would been done with them too.