chapter 4: drown
Summary:
The two fight for survival. Light saves L and L saves Light.
"We will swim together or sink together." - Trevor Manuel
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"We're in this together, if this goes south...we'll go down together." Light repeated.
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"Besides, as long as we're handcuffed together, you and I share the same fate. If I die, so will you" - L Lawliet
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L awoke to the skin-tickling sensation of bubbles escaping from underneath him.
Unlike the weightless feeling of before in the place of white, he felt laborious. He was sinking and he knew it. He blinked - liquids swirled across his body. The inky water frothed as the man motioned his limbs. Yes, he was definitely underwater. L sloshed against a wave that took him deeper. As he continued to submerge deeper into the water, a feeling of dread washed over him.
He was alone.
His ears pressurized under the increased depth. L tried to swim upwards, but his body wasn't used to the exertion. He had spent too much time in the weightless white. Air escaped him fervently as he chased the far away surface -it was getting farther away. L sank.
A jet stream twirled him playfully. Kicking uselessly, L found it hard to locate proper directions. The frigid temperature of the water continued to slow both his body and mind. This was troublesome.
He was going to die again…
His strength waned and he surrendered to his fate.
Light...
The thick sound of water surrounded him like a gentle caress.
Not long after, any conscious thought was swiftly robbed from him.
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Light's vision distorted as he bounced between breaking the surface of the water and being pulled underwater. He spluttered. A storm murderously attempted to join the two genii together in the watery grave below. He was low on air and needed to surface. Light yelped as a large wave bulldozed him back under.
Tearing into the cold air above, he fought to stay afloat. Light noticed cold pellets battering him from above - the rain was merciless. The sky was misty and full of grey. His lashes weighed heavily from the droplets clinging to them.
He spent time both cursing and praying Mu would at least lend him something to hold onto: a log, vine, anything. Mu remained dispassionate to his plea. Light decided he would place Mu into the same category as Ryuk was: ultimately, unhelpful. It was no different than from back then, Light would find his own way out. Resolute to his continued survival, Light fought viciously against the weather. He wasn't about to die again. It was too fucking soon.
Light surveyed the graying horizon for a glimpse of mopped black hair. He saw nothing. The sky continued to fog and mist - obscuring his vision. Light called out for L, staying as best he could to stay afloat. Nobody answered him. Only the storm.
The storm sung thunder and rain like a siren, drawing him to surrender to the depths below. Sink. Drown. Succumb. It sang enticingly.
Furrowing his eyebrows, the genii tried to keep focus. L must be underwater, where else could he be? The failed god inhaled, then dove unfazed into the cold torrents.
The storm hissed in disapproval. It knew L wasn't that far off from him: he was further down, about the depth of an average competitive swimming pool. The cold water was surprisingly bare - unriddled by any kind of life or debris: it was crystal clear. The surface of the water glowed only barely; there was no sun above to penetrate deep below. It was dark underneath, save a few dim rays. Below the waters, L swirled like a rag doll, slave to the deluge.
Light noticed him immediately. Just like in the white, L stood out against the dark waters too. L's pale skin was almost luminescent against the dim backdrop. Light swam deeper, catching up to his body. Air escaped from L's open lips at no one's will.
Oh no you don't. Don't you dare. Light kicked harder against the waves, coming an arms length away from the other man.
The time between L's death and Light's own was miserable. Light was unusually lonely. Until that point, he hadn't known that he could even be lonely. L was the only one that instigated such silly emotions within him.
He grasped L's white sweater with a vengeance and drudged it closer to him. L was heavier than he had expected. It was difficult to drag him towards the surface. The onslaught of currents were unforgiving. Air escaped forcefully from his gritted teeth - he was pushing his muscles to the limit.
Oh no you don't. Not this time.
Breaking once more against the chilly water surface Light gasped for all the air he could muster. He got a mouthful of salty rain. After confirming L too had access to the surface, Light surveyed the horizon once more for land. He started for it. L dragged on lifelessly in Light's grasp.
Only I get to claim your life. Don't you dare. Light repeated this like a mantra.
It worried Light that L was looking terribly pasty, even more pallid than he usually was. All color seemed to have drained from him and he looked a little blue. Sometimes, Light would drown himself just so that he could hold the lifeless detective higher above the water of an incoming wave. His muscles ached and screamed, exhausting all of his energy to get to shore. It wasn't that much farther, but his body trembled uncontrollably, close to giving up.
Soon, the embankment came into better view. He could see the waves crashing against the brim, exploding against dark rocks. Light clawed angrily upon them. Shore. Light roared triumphantly as he tore further inwards; dredging both his own body and L on to land. He was victorious. However, his muscles continued to shake from the strain.
Dragging the unconscious detective away from the incoming waves, they fell upon snow. Light's knees felt the crunch of frosting water. They pursued further inland - the floor turned into slush beneath them. A chilling wind caused the failed god to quiver uncontrollably. He took a moment just to bury his face unto L's chest, catching his breath. His body burned. Everything hurt. Light let out an exasperated whine. Shuddering at the cutting chill.
Stay calm, stay calm, stay calm.
He liberated himself from the feeling of helplessness and took another careful intake of air, before turning to inspect the body underneath him.
L wasn't breathing.
Light promptly sent two fists to pound his chest rhythmically while forcing air into the detective's throat. Diligently, the younger genii performed what CPR he best could. Breathe. Please. Breath. He begged. He swallowed the knot in his throat, refusing to break down. What if he was too late? A surge of panic rushed to overtake him. He continued the CPR for what felt like an eternity.
L. Wake up!
Tears trickled down his cheeks, livid at the thought of him being alone in this cold nowhere. He heaved angrily, frustrated. Adrenaline continued to run through his blood and he felt nothing except the arduous pounding of his own heart. Please. He begged again, aimlessly. Please just give me this. He exhaled into L's lips, and continued trying to pump the water out of him for the better of another minute.
...Finally, the detective coughed; sputtering water out of his lungs. Light could hear him choke. He cried in relief at the sound of the detective's fractured breathing.
"L!"
Huge waves of comfort soothed his aching body. The detective jerked and wheezed, curling over sideways to spit the rest of the water clogging his lungs out of him. Light's trembling body shivered with L's as they embraced. L continued to gasp for air painfully. Light had tucked his head into L's shoulder once again - soon, L followed suit.
"You're alive! Thank god." Light's grip tightened.
The detective continued to cough into Light's shoulders. His face contorted in pain. "...I'm laying in your arms, dying. Doesn't it remind you of something?" The detective forcefully tried to chuckle, referring to the other time the detective had died in Light's arms. It turned into a wheeze instead. Their wet bodies mussed together.
"Oh shut up L, you missed me." The failed god spat back.
"Yes, I do miss the feeling of dying in your arms. " L intoned with amusement.
Light scoffed, the detective had bounced back so quickly. He pat L's back steadily, hoping the rest of the water was out of his system.
"...I suppose I was correct to avoid the dark abomination. I probably wouldn't have made it." L shook his head, his raven hair sopping wet.
"Look on the bright side, we're not stuck in pure white nothingness anymore." Light mused. Rivulets of frigid water trailed down his hair and cheeks. He looked atrocious, but both genii smiled looking at the other.
Then, the detective's eyes widened almost comically, "Honestly Light-kun ... If you put your mind to it, there are lot of creative things you can do in such a space, rather than this... cold and wet hell ."
Light noticed the use of the suffix again, probably just to patronize him. He observed that L had enough energy now to observe their surroundings. He raised his brow at the comment. Creative things huh… Light could only imagine what L meant by that. He supposed L didn't survive in the white for 5 long years for nothing.
Light found himself in another round of violent shuddering from the cold and aching muscles, so he steered the conversation back into their survival. "Speaking of this cold and wet hell, we need to find shelter or some sort or we may freeze to death."
They both shuddered in each other's arms as the rain continued to drizzle on them. The two genii gravely nodded in agreement and achingly got up from the salty crunched snow they were sitting on.
"May? You mean: 95% chance we probably will. Saaaave me oh god of the new world. I'm at your mercy." L derided softly. Light supported the detective by lacing his arms underneath his armpits, and proceeded to walk away from the beach landing.
"Oh you admit what I could've been then? You can count on me ooooh great detective. As a show of my benevolence."
"As benevolent a mass murdering dead god could be, sure. "
The two genii chuckled warmly at each other. The important thing was: they were both alive this time. Light knew L couldn't help but poke at Light's notorious 'god complex'. He scoffed and shook his head. They continued small derisive banters like this while shuffling their weary bodies through the snow.
Every time they stepped, there was a audibly pleasing crunch underneath their feet. Light noticed L wasn't pleased at aforementioned crunch at all. He chuckled, that's what you get for not wearing shoes, L.
Ahead of the snow immediately in front of them - there appeared what could be identified as a fancy glasshouse. He could see it connected to another structure behind it, it was larger than they could immediately foresee. Light quickened his pace. His teeth chattered, and hope laced his emotions. The failed god wanted nothing more than to find shelter and focus on what was ahead of them. He was so sore, and so tired. L was heavy, and Light's eyes were starting to close involuntarily. The desperate younger genii transitioned into nearly a sprint, causing L to fumble more than once.
L had begun to notice the younger genii's heightened desperation. "Light, are you okay? I could do the rest of the walking."
"...of course. I'm fine . It's nothing. Just keep moving." Light pressed.
L furrowed his eyebrows. Light refused to not be okay. It wasn't like him to be helpless. Light didn't enjoy the feeling, and would never admit it.
L detested the cold snow underneath his naked feet, but he was getting worried. He believed he could take it from here. L knew Light had strained himself pulling them both out of the water, and he was much more exhausted than he claimed to be. Instantly, L was proven correct.
Light's knee buckled underneath him. He gasped, trying to keep it upright - this only made it shudder viciously before giving in. Light lurched forward into the snow along with L. They slammed against crunchy wet snow. It wasn't fluffy.
"Light!"
The failed god grimaced painfully, unable to get up.
"Light!" The detective repeated.
He groaned, wishing L would shut up. Everything was painful enough. Light could only grit his teeth, enduring it. L, deciding enough was enough, wormed his way out from underneath him. He tugged Light's arm and dragged him up with more strength than Light had expected from the scrawny body. The detective tossed Light's arm across his own shoulders, effectively switching their positions.
"We're nearly there. Hold on Light."
Light leaned onto him weakly.
L began proceeding forward, continuing their path towards the looming glass house. He hoped it was warm in there, because they were both exhausted. The detective's feet protested the extra weight he was now putting on them. He fervently hoped his toes wouldn't fall off from the frostbite. They continued further for another full minute, before the door to the glass house slowly... creaked open.
L's held his breath, eyes widening.
There, where the door had just opened... was a very familiar elderly gentleman, and a matching black suit and spectacles. One that the detective thought he would never see again. The elderly gentleman waved for them to hurry up inside. He held the door open for them as the two genii rushed inside the shelter.
"L, it is good to see you again, I see you've brought Light with you."
The detective's eyes started to glass, unable to hide his emotions at seeing his father figure alive and well. He smiled. "It has been far too long, Wammy."
The door to the glasshouse closed once more, shutting out the hellish cold they had just survived.
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Endnotes:
I recently read in L: Wammy's and L: one day that L refers to Watari as Wammy, instead of what I expected: Quillish. So here you go! If you haven't read to two aforementioned manga, I recommend it cause they're official extra stories to the manga describing L's life before the Kira case, and his childhood.