Okay – my son tells me there are 2 types of writers – ones that write for themselves and ones that write for their readers. I got some pretty harsh comments over the ending for 'second chances' (yeah – I deleted the meanest ones), so I'll provide an alternative ending to those of you that seem to think Tora either shouldn't die or Tora is still a jerk and you need to see some type of punishment. So this is my effort at writing for the readers – or at least the majority of them. It starts the same but wait for it...
Chapter 21
Misaki woke up before dawn. Her memories were back but Tora had said there were memories in the journal that could make her her suicidal. She needed to understand what he'd meant. She flipped toward the back of the journal and started to read. It was pretty clear that the year leading up to the car crash had been bad. Very bad. She remembered that it had been hard but it wasn't until she reread her words that she could feel the emotions she had been carrying at that time.
Her love for Takumi had never died. In fact it was still with her now, but back then it was so present, so much a part of her world that she couldn't imagine anything else. She had tried to move on. She had started dating Tora, but with Takumi constantly in her mind, her heart just couldn't consider loving anyone else no matter who they were or what they were like. She had written about guilt. She was troubled that she was leading Tora on, that he seemed to be falling for her but that she would never be able to love him. At least not when her every fiber yearned for Takumi. Takumi… the boy she thought had forgotten completely about her. No. The boy that appeared at the time to have never really cared about her at all. She had felt despair believing that she would forever live life hoping for something she had never really had. Guilt knowing she was only using the only person trying to save her. These were the dark memories that had haunted her.
She could understand why Tora wanted to protect her from them. The one thing Tora hadn't considered was that the car crash had given her a gift. It had taken away the memories of a Takumi for just a while and that had allowed her to open her heart up to new possibilities. That window of time where she was only part of herself allowed her to see that there were other paths in this world that could bring her happiness. It was because of that gift that she was able to learn to love Tora. If Tora had known this, would he have still kept the journal hidden? But she had needed that break to discover this new reality. If he'd give her the journal as soon as she'd emerged from the comma he would have been right. She would have just reentered the same hopeless world from which she sought escape. And why wouldn't she have then tried to escape a second time? It was only because she was able to live for this time without the burden of her past that she had discovered a different perspective. Could she blame him then for withholding this from her?
But her heart had opened itself to Tora because she had, to a degree, confused him with Takumi. Did this change the fact that once her heart was open, it was Tora's actions and words that had won him a part of her heart? And she now knew that no matter where in the world he was, a part of her would always belong to Takumi. Was it fair to stay with Tora when he loved her and only her but he would need to share at least a part of her soul with someone else? She closed the book. She shouldn't stay here in Takumi's home. It only confused her and would weaken her resolve to try to do right by Tora. Besides, Tora would be worried sick. If she didn't get back home soon, he would start looking for her. He'd call her mother's first and when she wasn't there it would scare him and her mom. She should get back and try to explain to him that, while she was upset and needed some time to sort out her feelings, she wasn't going to just throw him away. She was going to try to make this work.
She got changed and silently thanked Phillip for being so amazing. She wrote a quick little note to thank Takumi and left it on the night stand. Then she quietly slipped out of the apartment careful not to wake the sleeping man on the couch.
Takumi awoke about 15 minutes after Misaki had left his apartment. He reminded himself of his commitment. He would not give up his fight this time. He didn't care if she married Tora. He would still stalk her and pursue her and in the end she would see that it was hopeless to resist. They were meant to be together. Somewhere in her heart she knew it. He could tell… and she had said as much. Misaki was so wrapped up in trying to do the right thing. She thought that her brain would guide her to make the right choices in life but sometimes she needed to listen to her heart for advice. He started breakfast but then decided it might be best to wait until she was ready to wake up so that the food would still be hot. He peaked his head into the bedroom to gauge when she might wake up. She was gone. He felt an emptiness fill him. Why was she gone? Where had she gone?
He noticed the post it on the nightstand. She'd gone back to talk to Tora. He thought he could talk to her this morning that he could help her see the error she was making. Didn't she see what Tora had done? Couldn't she feel that he, not Tora, was the right person for her? He didn't want to have a long protracted period of winning her back. It wasn't good for any of them. If she really cared for Tora, she shouldn't stay with him because in the end, she'd end up leaving him. Maybe it wasn't too late. Maybe he could get to her before she went back to Tora. Takumi called down to the front desk. "A girl left this morning. I need to know if you remember when." Takumi described Misaki and found it had only been about 20 minutes since she'd left. If he hurried, he might be able to catch her at her apartment complex.
The cab pulled up across the street from Misaki's apartment. Takumi could see Misaki standing in front of the building. She was facing the street and in front of her stood Tora. They seemed to be talking. Tora reached over and took one of Misaki's hands and a terrifying thought crosses Takumi's mind. Last night, Misaki said she thought Tora was thinking of proposing. If she came back here and told him she'd forgiven him, what if he decided to try to lock her in. Takumi knew that Tora was a businessman. If a deal is hanging on by a thread, sometimes you do everything to make sure it doesn't fall apart. Takumi needed to get to her. He needed to stop them right now. He had to slow this down so he could win Misaki back without waiting years and watching her wade through a messy divorce. He threw some money at the cab driver and started running across the street. He didn't see anything. All of his focus was on the only thing that mattered to him… Misaki.
Tora too was focused on Misaki but he was also keeping an eye on the hotel lobby for Chiyo. After Misaki had left last night, he had called Chiyo up to let her know he had the place to himself and was feeling lonely. Chiyo was no Misaki. She wasn't someone his parents would fall in love with, she didn't turn heads at every event, she wouldn't make his long time rival seethe with envy, but she was pretty good in bed and being with just one girl was truly boring. He had changed for Misaki but he could only be expected to give up so much. Chiyo wasn't anything serious and if Misaki found out… well she would just blow everything out of proportion. This was just sex. He loved Misaki, so this shouldn't be a big deal. But Misaki was just so old fashioned.
Thank God Misaki had texted him. He really didn't expect her back this morning. He'd ran down stairs to stop her from coming upstairs hoping to buy Chiyo some time to get out of their place. He'd already managed to keep Misaki out of the apartment for at least 15 minutes. What the hell was taking Chiyo so long to get dressed and out here. He had to make sure to time things just right. He'd direct Misaki into the lobby through the main door while Chiyo slipped out through the revolving door on the side. Of course it would work. They'd done it a thousand times before. But then again, now Misaki had her memories back and she was currently mad at him, so it was especially important that Chiyo not mess things up today. Why had she worn the ball gown from last night over? If she was seen by Misaki, that would be harder to explain away.
Misaki was droning on and on about how hurt she was. He listened like the good little boyfriend, a role he'd managed to perfect. She stopped talking suddenly and he looked up at her in time to see a look of horror in her eyes. He turned to see what she was watching and as he turned he heard her scream, "Takumi". Damn that bastard. How much longer was he going to be hovering around his Misaki? As he turned he saw Takumi jump out of the way of a truck. That guy had more lives than a cat. It took a minute, but after the shock wore off, Takumi appeared along side of Tora and Misaki.
"What are you doing here?" Tora asked.
"Are you okay?" Misaki asked.
Takumi ignored Tora and took Misaki's hands in his own. "Of course, I'm not okay. You left… I had to find you."
Misaki had been at Takumi's last night? Tora was enraged. "Get your damn hands off my girlfriend! And what the hell did he mean that 'you left', Misaki?" Tora's anger had distracted him. Chiyo had emerged from the apartment complex while Misaki had remained out front. Misaki saw her and saw she was wearing the same clothes that she'd been wearing at the dinner last night. She was also carrying Misaki's favorite mug. Chiyo had been in her apartment and, from the looks of it, she had been there all night!
Chiyo looked over and locked gazes with Mizaki. Chiyo knew that they had been discovered. She had seen the look of a woman discovering her boyfriend had betrayed her in the past. Chiyo smiled. Finally, Tora would be free. Finally, they could be a real couple. She looked at her Tora with that same look she had last night.. the look of longing was plastered all over her smug smiling face. She called to Tora, "Goodbye dear – see you at work."
It was then Tora knew Misaki had already discovered his little secrete. He was panicked and started to speak but was stopped by the cold hard slap across his face. Misaki was fuming.
Takumi had been watching the situation play out. He'd never trusted a Tora. Now he just wanted to get Misaki as far away from him as possible but first, he had to do one thing. He gave Tora a hard right to the cheek and that was all it took. Tora was knocked out cold. Chiyo dropped the mug and came running over. Takumi grabbed Misaki and steered her to a cab. He pushed her in.
"Where to?" The cab driver asked.
Takumi looked at Misaki and smiled. He didn't really care where they went as long as she was by his side.