Special Brownies

"I want chocolate," Jeff announced. "Somebody go get me some chocolate."

Matt rolled his eyes. "Do we look like your slaves or something? Go get your own chocolate."

"But it tastes better when somebody else gets it for me!"

Hunter pointed to a pan that was sitting on the catering table. "I think we have the answers to your prayers Jeff." He picked up the pan and showed it to them. The pan was holding a nice batch of chocolate brownies.

"It's beautiful," Shawn said amazement. "Let's eat it!"

"Guys, I don't think that's a good idea," Rey Mysterio tried to warn them.

Hunter glared at him. "Shut up you little midget. I'll kill you."

"Hunter, he's not a midget," Jeff objected. "He's just a tiny man. There's a…well, not a big difference, but there's still a difference."

So Matt, Shawn, Hunter and Jeff ignored Rey as he continued to try to warn them away from the brownies and they took those brownies into Shawn's locker room. As they were eating them, they noticed something was a little off about their treats.

"These taste funny," Jeff complained. "Who the hell made these things?"

"I don't know," Matt said. He looked at the brownie he was eating closely. "Do you think they used the Splenda instead of real sugar?"

Hunter shook his head. He had just figured out was really going on with the brownies but he wasn't saying anything. "No Matthew, it's a different kind of ingredient entirely."

XXXXXX

"Where did my brownies go?" Brian Kendrick asked. He had come back to the catering area to find the brownies he had made himself gone.

"Uh…DX and the Hardys took them," Rey explained.

"What? You let those idiots take my special brownies?"

"Oh my God, you put marijuana in your brownies and just left them here, didn't you?" Rey yelled. "How could you do that? Do you have any idea what can happen with a bunch of high idiots running around?"

Brian frowned. "Uh…chaos?"

"Yes you stupid stoner! Chaos! We're doomed I tell you! Doomed!"

XXXXXXXXX

"You know, sometimes I wish I was a fish," Shawn announced. "I mean, I like the water a whole lot. And fish get to live in water. Yeah, they have a pretty awesome life."

Matt shoved a thing of cheese puffs into his mouth. "I love these things man. They're so soft and cheesy."

Jeff was looking down at his nails in horror. "My nails are dying!" he exclaimed. "They're dying dudes. Look at them Hunter! They're all black, like death and stuff."

Hunter looked at Jeff's nails. "Actually, that kind of looks like nail polish."

"What? My nails are dying and you think it's nail polish?" Jeff punched Hunter in the face. "Stupid bastard! Don't tell my nails aren't dying!" He picked at his nail and made some of the nail polish chip off. "Oh wait, it is nail polish. Never mind."

Shawn was puckering his lips like a fish. "You see, fish have the best life ever. They just swim around all day and that's what they do."

Matt just kept shoving more cheese puffs into his mouth. "Guys, I'm serious, you really need to try these things. They're awesome."

Jeff held out his hand. "Well let me try some dude."

Matt slapped Jeff's hand away. "Fuck you dude! I didn't say you could try my cheese puffs! Get your own!"

Hunter looked at Shawn. "You know Shawn, being a fish isn't all fun and games. Fish get caught by fisherman. They also get eaten by millions of people across the world."

Shawn gasped. "No! I must save the fishes! Viva la fishstance!" He got up and ran out of the room.

Hunter chuckled. "What a maroon." He looked at Matt and Jeff. "You know, this psychic once told me that in a past life, I was one of the king of the world. That's why I call myself the King of Kings."

"You are so full of shit Hunter," Matt replied. He giggled. "You're full of shit, and I'm full of cheese puffs!" He laughed insanely and shoved more cheese puffs into his mouth.

"Hunter, why are you full of shit?" Jeff asked. "Did you eat some shit or something?"

"No, I did not eat shit."

"Do you have to go to the bathroom?"

"No! Quit asking me questions. I feel like I'm being interrogated." Hunter's eyes widened. "Am I being interrogated? Are you an FBI agent? Are you trying to arrest me? You better be straight with me man!"

Stephanie came barging into the room. "What the hell are you guys doing?" she yelled. "Shawn just got arrested for breaking into the zoo and freeing the fish from the aquarium."

Jeff's jaw dropped open. "Wow, how did he get there so fast? Did he fly?"

"No you idiot! The arena is right across the street from the zoo. Now what do you have to say for yourself?"

Jeff and Hunter looked at each other. "Viva la fishtance!" they yelled.

Stephanie just shook her head. "I'm not going to pretend to know what that means." She looked at Matt. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

Matt just grinned at her. "Cheese puffs rule," he said. "Cheese puffs are the shit."