A/N: Well, this is the last chapter for today and maybe a couple days. I have school things to sort out and frankly so much emotional stuff at once is tiring.

That being said, this is probably my first time writing something this deeply emotional between the two of them, let alone any original stories of my own. I hope this came across well and not sappy or overdone in any way! Constructive criticism is always appreciated!

Thank you again to all those who review, fave, and follow! You keep me going!

It's a Best Friend Thing

I couldn't sleep.

Flashes of that thing snatching the Doctor out of existence, his regret as he shoved me out of the way, haunted every dream. All the time "I'm sorry" whispered through my mind.

After the third nightmare scaring me awake, I gave up. Nothing could shake those memories and the feelings they stirred up from my mind enough to give me peace. I had to clear my head.

Barefoot with baggy shirt, sweatpants, and robe, I made my way to the control room. It might not have been the literal heart of the TARDIS, but it felt the most calming. So quiet and dimmed since all but one of us had gone to bed. I didn't know if the Doctor managed to get any sleep.

I'd kept my mind firmly sealed off ever since he'd removed the extra protection from it hours ago. Didn't trust myself to keep my thoughts and feelings from bleeding over. It hadn't been the right time then. Not when Rose had lost her father theoretically for a second time.

On a whim, I shimmied up one of those columns to nestle in one of the 'Y' shaped branches. More comfortable than I'd thought it would be.

I sighed and ran my hand through a messed-up nest of my hair. My reaction to the Doctor vanishing—essentially dying for a few minutes—was much stronger than it needed to be, for sure. A friend like Rose would be upset, yes, but I doubted she had trouble sleeping now. That just made me groan and rub my face fiercely.

Oh face it, girlie, he's not just a friend to you anymore, now is he? Mocked the braver inner me. The Jessica Gale that had no problem in knowing what she felt no matter how complicated it would make my life. Even if that were the case, he wouldn't know I felt that way unless I flat out told him.

I could never do that. I wasn't brave enough. Nor was he in a state where such an admission would be received well, if at all. I might be permanently lost, but the Doctor….

"Jessica?" As if he heard my thoughts, the Doctor came around the console with quiet steps that matched the subdued tone in his voice. No, he hadn't been sleeping, but he didn't wear his jacket at the moment, either. A simple long-sleeve shirt. A look that made him seem like he'd stripped away an extra defensive layer of himself that the jacket represented. "Are you all right?"

Kicking my leg a bit as it dangled a foot or so off the ground, I tried to keep my inner thoughts from showing on my face. "If I said yeah, are you going to believe me?" I couldn't quite look at him straight on. Not without giving away my troubled thoughts so emotionally loudly that even he couldn't miss them.

A soft huff crossed the short distance, like I'd almost made him smile. "Nope. Didn't believe you the first time, anyway." With hands stuffed in his pants pockets, he came closer, his head reaching my elbow. "You're many things, Jessica Gale, but you're a terrible liar. It doesn't suit you."

Even sealed off, I could feel how open he made himself to me. Almost like a doorway compared to the crawlspace it had been since we'd met. Tears stung at the back of my eyes. I could barely think of being upset at him past all the affection that radiated around me like a blanket he tried to put around my shoulders.

Still, I had to try and keep myself from wounding him with my overemotional self. I played with the edge of my robe, clearing my throat of the knot that tried to get rid of my voice entirely. "Just…thinking. It's nothing for you to worry about, I promise." My best attempt at a reassuring smile made an appearance as I peeked at him out of the corner of my eye.

Instead of avoiding the sensitive subject like I expected him to, the Doctor sighed and shook his head. Lines deepened around his eyes and muscles worked in his jaw as it tightened. "The whole time I've known you, Jessica, you've never held back from saying anything. Even when I didn't want to hear it." He reached up and took my hand in his with a downward tug. Urging me out of my makeshift treehouse. When I relented and slid back down, he tapped my head with a finger. "You're too quiet up here. You're not usually this upset…."

"Upset?" My bitter, strangled attempt at a laugh brought the Doctor up short. Tears now choked my words, burned so close to the front of my eyes they threatened to spill at any moment. "Doctor, for five minutes today, you were dead. That thing came for us and you vanished. For five minutes, I had to deal with the fact that you were erased from existence." I threw my hands up in the air dramatically, going a bit dramatic in the face of the raging beast that screamed inside me. "Of course I'm upset! You didn't even warn me!"

The Doctor didn't go immediately on the defensive as my voice rose and grew teeth. Just stared at me with a clenched jaw and fierce eyes. "There was no other way once that thing got in," he replied with a calm more on my level than his usual. "I had no Plan B after the church and the TARDIS. Nothing. I was just winging it from the start. Missed that class in school." His voice quivered from the strength of effort to be open with me. He swallowed before saying anything else. "It was the only thing I could think of to buy you some time."

"But you had no idea that you'd make it back!"

"I'm a Time Lord!" He countered, finally putting a bit of spark back into his voice. "I stood a better chance of surviving that then you did. Which begs the question why you thought you could try something so…." The Doctor's voice caught, choked off by more emotions than I'd ever heard from him. "You could've been…."

I knew exactly what he tried to ask. What confounded him so much. My angry tirade drifted into oblivion before I could even set it free. "For the same reason you made it go after you in the first place." I did give him a shove in the chest, but couldn't find the fury in me to make it hurt. "I knew you'd do something that stupid so I tried to make sure the best friend I've ever had didn't get killed before saving everyone else first! That's what best friends do; save each other's asses when they know they're going to do something stupid like sacrifice themselves!"

Dead silence followed that outburst. I feared that I'd overstepped my bounds since all I felt from the Doctor had come to a calm just like before a great storm. My own barriers had held none of my emotions in check as I blurted everything out.

I swallowed past a suddenly dry mouth, and really looked at him. Only I didn't see a Time Lord staring quietly at me. Just a man so lost and used to being alone that my words had swept the universe out from under him. It seemed like I finally looked at the real man behind the title "Doctor"—or at least a good glimpse of him—and not the last of the Time Lords.

How long had it been since anyone had called him a best friend, anyway?

Patches of a strong blush creeped up my neck the longer he stared at me yet I couldn't turn away. My tiny smile practically screamed shyness, more than I'd ever felt with him. "Sorry, I…that was too…um…."

For the first time, the Doctor reached out and drew me to him for a hug. Not as fierce as when we were both relieved he existed again. Just a solid, very warm embrace from one friend to another. Genuine and without any signs of awkwardness at the prolonged contact. One I never thought he'd give into.

So I wouldn't scare him off, I kept my arms gentle as I clasped my hands behind his back. The beating of his hearts thudded against my ears. Faster than usual just as my own heart raced. The energy that flooded him felt like a spark of real life had entered him. I couldn't hold back a few tears as that doorway between us glowed like a billion suns.

"Don't you ever do something that stupid again, okay?" The thickness in his voice and his embrace spoke so much more than that attempt at a scolding.

A chuckle worked its way free, giddy with relief and happiness. "I'd say the same to you, mister, but you kinda have this thing for saving people." I tightened my hug a bit in a squeeze. "Just…give me a warning next time, please? We'll keep each other from being stupid that way."

The Doctor's forehead rested against the top of my head. The breath from his smile danced on my skin. "I can do that."