Matt's Revenge

"Guys, I'm kind of scared," Jeff said as he, Shawn and Hunter ate some ice cream. "Matt's been acting weird since we wrote on him after he passed out drunk. I think he's planning on getting us back somehow."

Hunter frowned. "Well why would he do that? We were just having fun."

"You wrote "I love cock" on his forehead," Shawn reminded his long time friend. "I'd be mad too if I were him."

"Oh come on! I just did that to be funny! He doesn't need to take everything all personally."

"Maybe we should apologize," Shawn suggested. "Maybe then he won't do anything to get back at us."

Jeff snorted. "Come on Shawn, let's be serious here for a minute. Apologizing means admitting we did something wrong, and I don't think we did. I think what we need to do is force him not to get back at us."

"And how will we do that?" Hunter asked.

"Uh…I don't know. I was hoping you guys would come up with that plan. I'm not good at making plans like that."

"Well we could…" Hunter's voice trailed off as Matt came into the room. "Oh shit, this isn't good."

Matt grinned pleasantly at them. "Hi guys, what's going on?"

"I don't want to die!" Shawn screamed as he hid behind Hunter. "Don't let him kill me buddy!"

"Matty don't hurt me," Jeff begged. "I'll be good from now on, I promise!"

Matt held up his hands. "Relax you guys, I'm not here to hurt anyone."

"Really?" Jeff said hopefully.

"Really really," Matt said with a nod. "In fact, I wanted to give you guys a present for getting me so damn good the other day. I'm just going to get it from the hallway."

Hunter frowned. "Why do I have the feeling that he's so totally lying?"

Matt came back in and he now was hiding something behind his back. "Boys, I would like to present to you Maria's lovely dog Mr. Kettles!" He took the poodle out from behind his back and set it down on the ground. "Oh, and I should tell you, he now has a taste for Skittles, cowboy boots and leather jackets."

"No!" Shawn screamed as Matt quickly left the room and locked the door behind him. He jumped on Hunter's back and glared at the small dog. "Don't let him get me! He's evil!"

Hunter rolled his eyes. He had never had an encounter with Maria's crazy dog, so he had no idea just how dangerous the animal really was. "Oh come on, he's a cute little thing." He reached down to pet the dog. "I'm sure he won't hurt us."

Mr. Kettles began to growl. Hunter looked startled by that, but he quickly became even more startled by the fact that Mr. Kettles started biting him because he was wearing his leather coat. "OW!" Hunter screamed. He tried to take his arm back, but Mr. Kettles would not let go. As a result of that, Hunter ended up dangling Mr. Kettles in mid-air. "GET HIM OFF ME! GET THIS CRAZY FUCKING ANIMAL OFF OF ME!"

Jeff grabbed Mr. Kettles and tried to pull him off of Hunter. "Come on boy, stop that! Hunter is not a chew toy!"

"Jeff, your Skittles are about to fall out of your pocket!" Shawn cried out.

As soon as Mr. Kettles heard the word "Skittles", he immediately began attacking Jeff instead. Jeff screamed as the crazy canine began stuffing its nose in his pocket. "Somebody stop him!" he pleaded. "He's going to get my candy!"

Shawn tried to help by attempting to kick Mr. Kettles right in the face (even though that really constituted as cruelty to animals). But Mr. Kettles scrambled up Jeff's body at the last second, which led to the Rainbow Haired Warrior being kicked right in the fingers. "Owie! Shawn! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I was aiming for the dog! I didn't mean to kick you!"

Mr. Kettles took advantage of his opportunity by sneaking back down, getting Jeff's Skittles out of his pocket and then jumping down to run around the room with them. "NO!" Jeff yelled angrily. "YOU GIVE THOSE BACK RIGHT NOW!"

Hunter groaned as he tried to help Jeff get his candy back. "I hate this fucking dog! I am not even joking right now!"

Shawn tried to jump on the dog to make it stop, but Mr. Kettles moved out of the way. As Shawn fell to the ground, Mr. Kettles took a bite at his shoes. But as Jeff tried to capitalize on the distraction, Mr. Kettles turned around and took a bite out of something else: Jeff's hand.

Jeff screamed in pain and ripped his hand out of Mr. Kettles' grip. "Damn it! I've had it with this mother fucking dog!" He ran to the door and started pounding on it. "Let us out Matt! You let us out right now!"

XXXXXXXXX

Matt grinned as he listened to all the screaming that was going on in the room he was standing outside of. He was very pleased with what he had done. That would teach his stupid friends to mess with him while he was drunk. "I am so awesome for coming up with this plan," he said to himself. He would have patted himself on the back, but that would have been too weird, even for him. "I am the fucking king!"

Maria and Candice walked over to him. "Have you seen Mr. Kettles?" Maria asked. "I can't find him anywhere."

Matt just kept grinning. "Mr. Kettles is taking care of some business for me." He unlocked the door and opened it just in time for Jeff, Hunter and Shawn to run screaming out of the room. Mr. Kettles, who had a chewed up bag of Skittles in his mouth, stopped chasing the three wrestlers to sit by Maria's leg. "Ria, I hate to say this, but I think I like your evil dog now," Matt said. "I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship."