Chapter 11

Sasha pulled the car to a stop outside of Tom's house. He looked out the window and saw the condition of his home. It was startling to see it in such good shape. He didn't have to be a genius to know Sasha did this, she had made sure the house was ready for him. His heart filled with grief mixed with joy as part of him expected the kids to run out the front door with Darien.

But Darien was gone, the memories were all that were left. He also knew the kids were still in St Louis with Andrea. He'd spoken to her a few times on the phone. He hadn't been able to talk to the kids but he would this week. He just needed to acclimate back into his life.

They both silently got out of the vehicle and Tom made his way up the front porch. Part of him felt like he was coming home but everything was different. He'd learnt in therapy that he'd never really acknowledged Darien's loss. He'd just kept moving forward pushing his problems and grief behind him but they all came back just as his guilt over Rachel's death hit him. But today, he was here to put it to rest. He wanted to be happy, he didn't want to carry Rachel and Darien around with him as Ghosts.

"I have the keys." Sasha said, she fumbled for a moment as she pulled the keys out of her jeans pocket and handed them to him.

"Thank you." he said, he looked at the key for a moment before he used them to open the front door. The house had been cleaned, but everything was just how he'd left it. It felt like a lifetime ago. He dropped his duffel bag inside the lounge room and turned back to Sasha.

He could see she was uneasy, he didn't blame her, this house belonged to another life; to another woman he'd loved. He stepped in close to her and ran a hand down her arm until their hands met. She looked to him as he intertwined their fingers.

"Thank you for this. Thank you." he told her overwhelmed by everything she had done for him; most importantly for waiting for him. For being by his side, for saving him.

"I love you." she confessed in a low voice.

"I love you too." He told her, he cupped her face with his other hand. He felt her pulse jump under his hand by her jaw, her skin was just as smooth and warm as he remembered. He pulled her gently to him, and she went, helplessly, as if under the same spell he was.

All she did was stare at him as he lowered his head, parted her lips with his thumb, she sank right into the kiss and into him and he groaned in pleasure diving inside the kiss with her. She filled his mouth with undulations of her tongue, they released hands and he pulled her tight against her as she grasped his upper arms.

They were kissing, and responding like it was the first time yet the thousand time they had kissed. The mingled history of their youth and the present; crashing into one perfect storm of pleasure and emotions.

Much to his chagrin, she was the first to pull away but unlike the last time they had kissed; she didn't look hurt or angry. She looked happy and he felt it too. They smiled and pressed their foreheads together as they caught their breath.

"We have to take this slow." Sasha said, he gave a nod as he didn't want to fuck this up. He wanted them to last.

"I agree," He told her, glad she had suggested they go slow.

"Pizza?" she asked him, as she reluctantly stepped back but they both knew if she didn't then they'd both do something they both weren't ready for.

"Perfect." He told her.

"Good, cause I can't cook to save my life." She informed him.

"Some things haven't changed." Tom said with a chuckle as she swatted his arm playfully.

"Ok, how do I look?" Daniela asked as she came out of her room in a black sleeveless mini dress with a deep v neck like. Her hair was in some elaborate half up half down do and her makeup racy with cat eye makeup and red lips.

"Like you'll catch a cold. Maybe you should put on some real clothes like some pants and a turtle neck top." Wolf told her, he was showered and in sweats and blue singlet feeling like a slob but he didn't care.

"Please, if we weren't related you'd be all over this." She told him as she gestured to herself. Wolf shook his head as he had never been into brunettes as they always reminded him of his little sister and now his twin.

"No, I wouldn't." Wolf assured her.

"You know, that Azima woman. She is hot, maybe she'll throw you a pity fuck given you're too good for Miller." Daniela told him.

"Just stop." Wolf said firmly but Daniela pushed on.

"No, I'm tired of living with Oscar the Grouch. Maybe you should get dressed and smile at someone you'd like to fuck. It'd be more fun than watching 'Golden Girls' reruns and drinking Prune Juice. It's not attractive." She told him as she pulled on her strappy flat sandals to complement her outfit.

"I'm really relating to Dorothy." Wolf told her.

"I guess that makes me Blanche, and Miller is totally Rose while Burk is your cranking mother?" she asked him.

"Sure." Wolf said as a knock sounded at the door. Daniela smiled as she picked up her clutch purse and opened the door to find Miller and Burk.

"Don't you boys look good?" She said appreciably. Miller blushed beet red at the compliment but Wolf couldn't blame the man. He was usually overlooked by the opposite sex at least he had been until Daniela had made a point of 'noticing' him.

"Thanks." Miller said.

"You know, if you ever want a girlfriend? I make the best wing woman." She told Miller before she beamed at Burk. Wolf did not understand how those two happened but they had been dancing around one another for a while. Well, more like Daniela hunted Burk.

"I'll keep it in mind." Miller said as he bypassed her for the couch; leaving Burk to Daniela's mercy.

"You're really dressed up." Burk said looking at her, he looked freaked out not like a man gearing up to tear her clothes off.

"Yes, we're going out." Daniela told him, unsure as she was sure he heard her right when they spoke on the phone. But now she was second guessing herself. Something she rarely did.

"I was going to suggest we hang with the guys." He said, her face fell as this was not how she saw her evening go.

"Oh, are you sure?" she asked him, trying to act like it was nothing.

"Yeah, there's a Franklin and Bash marathon," Burk said and the man actually looked excited at the notion of a TV show than going out with her. She suddenly felt like the overdressed moron. She had thought they would be going on a date but apparently not. She pushed down her embarrassment and plastered on a smile.

"You and the boys can enjoy yourselves. I'm going out, don't wait up." She said, she didn't bother wait for a response as she pushed past Burk and headed for the elevator. Her head held high, at least until the elevator doors closed.

"Dude, why would you turn her down so coldly?" Miller asked Burk. Wolf had to agree but he kept his mouth shut. He knew that partly Daniela had read too much into what was going on but then Burk probably hadn't been clear enough in explaining his side of things.

"I said we'd hang. Daniela's fun as a friend but she's not a long term potential for a spouse. She was dressed for a date."

"She thought it was a date." Wolf said.

"Look, she's cool and she saved the ex CNO's ass but I can't date her. Her past would affect my career." Burk explained, he had three months to mull over it and it was the best option for him. It wasn't like he'd encouraged her, she had come on strong and didn't know how to pick up on the signals. At least that was what he told himself.

"What bullshit." Wolf said shaking his head in disappointment. "If you don't like her then just tell her that." Wolf added before he took a sip of his water. He wished it was a beer but he was watching his diet until he was able to exercise more.

"She was an international criminal who spent time in a black site. Contrary to popular belief, who you choose as a spouse reflects on how the leaders perceive your judgement." Burk told them.

"I'd date her, but she's a little too old for me." Miller said, Wolf laughed as the man blushed.

"I want to have my own command one day. She would never get security clearance and how can trust a man who's partner hits on everything that has a pulse and was known to socialise with criminals?" Burk asked.

Wolf would've decked Burk but kept in his seat as it was really Burk's loss for not realising that Daniela was capable of changing. That and senior leadership would forgive Daniela's past given she'd helped them and she had been keeping out of trouble and making a real go at keeping on the rights side of the law.

"Are you sure you want to stay here?" Sasha asked Tom, they were sitting in the living area eating pizza straight out of the box. No cutlery or plates. Darien would've murdered him for trying to do this. That and the lack of coaster usage for the sodas they were drinking. But then it was now his domain.

"Yeah, I didn't get a chance to really go through everything and pack it up like I should've last time." Tom told her.

"You want to sell it?" she asked him, surprised by the notion.

"I don't know. I'll ask the kids but I don't think I could go back to St Louis. Too much has happened there for me to feel comfortable." He said, he also didn't want to be roped back into the politics of St Louis. He knew Oliver would want him to show his face on the news and thank the Navy for his rescue. That was fine but he couldn't be CNO, he knew he couldn't be deployed back into the field which left him with very limited career choices. But he'd worry about that later.

"I understand." She told him.

"It must be weird for you." he said.

"I haven't been living in here. I have an apartment a couple suburbs away." She told him.

"I said you could use it." Tom said with a frown surprised she wouldn't use free accommodation.

"Tom, it's yours and Darien's place. I didn't want to mar that." she told him kindly, he understood what she was saying and wasn't insulted in the least. She felt like an outsider in this house, how could she not with all the photos of his family and Darien around the house.

"You wouldn't mar anything but you're right about the house. Darien decorated the whole house. I just wielded the paint brush and did what I was told." He said with a grin which turned rueful as he realised the disconnect he felt with his surroundings. It had been home because the kids and Darien lived here. It was suited to Darien's tastes, he had never thought of what he'd wanted or what his style of living was as he spent majority of his life at sea.

"Maybe, if you're staying then you could change some of the things around here for yourself." She suggested.

"What would you do?" he asked her.

"Oh no, that is a trap. Thomas Chandler, just think of one room you wouldn't mind changing and what you'd like it to look like." Sasha told him.

"Main bedroom." Tom said saying the first room that came to mind that disturbed his peace the most. But Sasha misread him as she nudged him with her barefoot and chuckled. He smiled as he understood where her mind went. "I'm being serious, the house is so white. I can't change it too much cause of the kids but my room? I'd repaint it." Tom told her firmly.

"Let me guess… Navy Blue." She said cheekily, Tom blushed as she had guessed right.

"It's a large enough room to handle the colour." He said somewhat defensively; confirming her suspicion, she laughed and it was music to his ears. He gave a good hearted shrug. "I like dark blue." He grumbled in good humour.

"Of course, it's your room. You paint it how you want. I'll even help you." Sasha offered.

"It'll be your room too, when you're ready." he told her.

"I know, I'm also partial to Navy." She said in an amused manner. "But for now I want you to do things for yourself." she added, they both understood her reasoning. It wasn't a fear of overstepping, it was that Tom needed to find his own feet and make choices for himself. To be selfish in ways he hadn't allowed himself to be in the past.

"Well, if that's the case." Tom said, he wiped his hands on a napkin and tossed it on the coffee table. He moved up the couch and was about to crawl over Sasha when she pressed a foot into his chest.

"We're taking things slowly Sailor." She said with a grin and light blush gracing her cheeks as she nudged him away.

"Ok." He conceded as he reluctantly sat back.

"Yeah, at least take me out to dinner first." Sasha said with a chuckle.

Daniela sat at the bar with her near finished Mojito, she'd come to her favourite bar called 'Lobo Plantation', it was a Latino hot spot thanks to cheap strong drinks, great food and salsa dancing. She felt like such a fool, part of her romanticised that maybe if she was a good person, that maybe she could find a good man but apparently it wasn't so.

It wasn't like she was hung up on Burk, but she had other failed ventures into the dating world. Men in general were entrapped by her 'exotic' accent and looks but soon it became awkward as she couldn't blab out that she'd been in prison for four years and had no clue what it was like to survive a pandemic. She had wondered what the point was; given no man who really knew her would give her the time of day. Something that had once been amusing on the ship was now a sore spot. It made her aware that she was alone.

She couldn't return to Europe where she could fit in and she now lived in America where she was tolerated. Ok, Sasha liked her but pretty much everyone else tolerated her. She had dialled back her personality and felt like she'd lost herself in trying to be accepted.

"Two Mojitos over here." a familiar voice called, Daniela looked up from her drink to see Captain Meylan, he was dressed in tan chinos and navy blue collared button down shirt with sleeves rolled to his elbows. He looked really good; she wondered who his lucky woman was.

She looked back to her drink as she didn't need him to see her having a pity party of one. But no such luck as a fresh Mojito slid into her view. She looked up at Meylan who sat down in the chair next to hers.

"You look like you could use a fresh one." he said as he pushed one of the mojitos her way just a little more to emphasise that it was hers before he picked up the other. She watched as he pulled out the straw and drank from the glass.

"Thank you." Daniela said, before she took a sip of the drink.

"You look like someone has died." Meylan told her.

"My love life." Daniela quipped, he smiled and even she couldn't help but smile at the humour even if it was incredibly sad. "Don't worry, I won't try to resurrect while you're here. I know you can barely tolerate me." Daniela added.

"Not true, I just prefer to keep my work and social life separate. Nathan James is where I work. This is where I socialise and don't mind lines getting a little blurry on land." Meylan told her. Daniela nodded as she understood what he was saying.

"I thought I was going out on a date but I got friend zoned at the front door." Daniela told him, as she couldn't bothered lying and two mojitos into her own misery that she wanted to vent.

"Dressed like that?" he asked incredulously. Daniela ducked her head and nodded, her confidence was eroded to dust as she couldn't find anything going right for her. Her drunk side was telling her that Meylan was checking her out and appreciating the effort of her work. But she silenced that side quickly as she had very few interactions with the man in the past when she was on the ship. He was usually incredibly stern and walked the other way when she was in the vicinity.

"Yes, but it's not really the first time. I'm either just an exotic toy or my past gets in the way for anything meaningful to happen. Just how things are, but hey, I have two jobs, hobbies and I'm not in imminent danger. So I shouldn't be complaining. I'm a wholesome rounded person." She slurred slightly with a casual shrug. Meylan smiled and chuckled.

"Well rounded person and I'm ordering you some food." Meylan said, before Daniela could object he'd taken care of ordering leaving her dumbstruck when he asked her what her favourite dish was. Once the bartender went away to put the order in, he looked back to her, "So is the friend here with you?" he asked her.

"No, he's at home with my brother. I decided to come out as I couldn't let this go to waste." Daniela said with a smile as she gestured to herself.

"It's only a waste if you don't enjoy it." He remarked, he placed his drink down and held out his hand to her. "May I have this dance?" he asked.

"Really?" she asked him surprised by the offer but in a good way.

"Yeah, come on. Food won't be ready for at least 20 minutes." He told her, she didn't even hesitate as she took his hand and let him take her out onto the dance floor.

"Stay with me." Tom told Sasha as it was well past midnight but he didn't want her to go. If he were honest he was afraid of being alone in a house filled with ghosts. Ghosts of his past life and of Darien. She was everywhere in this house but it wasn't a soft sweet reminiscent feeling but sharp pain of loss and guilt. Sasha helped him not slip into a morose state. Her presence seemed to keep things into perspective. "I'll keep my hands above the waist." He told her.

"Like there's nothing of interest above my waist." She asked as she was pulling on her boots to set off for her apartment. She wore an amused smile as she tugged on the laces.

"Never claimed that." Tom said, Sasha chuckled and he smiled as he loved her presence.

"We're taking things slow." Sasha told him, he moved in close and brushed hair behind her ear. She looked to him and the moment seemed to freeze for a moment. She looked so utterly beautiful.

"I do slow. I was very good at slow." He promised her, they both shared a smile before Tom laughed and gave up. He knew better than to push his luck and he was probably better off dealing with his own issues about being home alone.

"It's so good to see you smiling and laughing again." Sasha told him.

"So you'll stay?" He asked, because he couldn't help himself. Sasha just smiled and shook her head.

"No, you need to stand on your own two feet. I have an early morning tomorrow." Sasha told him.

"You're right, I'll walk you to your car." He said.

"Muay Tai?" Meylan asked surprised as he couldn't see Daniela fighting. She was more a woman who talked her way out of a situation. But then he reminded himself not for the first time tonight that she was not how he'd judged her.

Sure, their paths hadn't crossed very often due to his duties but he'd judged her harshly. He knew she was not an innocent victim of circumstances. She had a very questionable past and walked around like she owned the space she was in and everyone was there for her pleasure. Tonight, he saw things slightly differently.

He wouldn't begin to pretend she was a totally different person. He did know she sacrificed a lot to come to America. She obviously wasn't fitting in as seamlessly as she didn't Europe. Pity had made him buy her a drink but the rest of the evening was something entirely different. He enjoyed her company, he enjoyed dancing with her, sharing drinks and laughing. It was just good to let loose. If he were honest, he hadn't blown off any steam since the beginning of the Pandemic.

"Yes, it's brutal but fun. I only do it cause Sasha suggested it and we bond over it. I'd prefer to do yoga but Sasha prefers to kick the shit out of things." Daniela said with a shrug.

"It's good stress relief." Meylan offered, she smiled and nodded.

"Do you do it too?" She asked him.

"Muay Tai? Yes, and a few other martial arts." He said.

"And you dance." She pointed out with a smile. He nodded in agreement as he usually kept this side of himself locked away. Though in fairness, he'd been working nonstop for 4 years now. No way in hell would he let the crew try and talk crap about his ability to dance.

"My maternal grandparents were professional Latin dancers. They travelled the world doing comps and teaching. So of course, we grandkids had to learn." He told her with a shrug. Majority of his past lovers had thought it was 'hot' or 'cute'. None of them actually could dance as well as Daniela could, she seemed to enjoy the act of dancing with him than gushing over him and his muscles or military status.

"Well, you are by far the best salsa partner I've danced with. Your Tango could use some work." She teased with a smile. Meylan couldn't help but laugh.

"But seriously, I had so much fun tonight." Daniela told him.

"Me too." Meylan said, it was true. He liked that she was removed from the ship but still in the same world and level as him to understand his lifestyle. To understand that he wasn't a hero to be worshipped or a notch to be had on her bed post. "Just don't tell anyone about the dancing. It might ruin my reputation." He added jokingly. He knew no one would believe her.

"I think it would only improve it. At least with the women." Daniela teased.

"I think I do just fine on my own." Meylan said as he looked to her, he liked her. He liked this side of her that wasn't a front or act to deflect from the person she was.

"That I've no doubt." Daniela said as they slowed to a stop outside her apartment building. "Here we are." She added.

"Nice place." He said.

"It's a shit hole, but an overall improvement of where I lived before. The rent is cheap and Wolf kills the spiders." Daniela told him, Meylan couldn't help but laugh at her blunt humour as he highly doubted Daniela had issues with spiders but he liked that she could make light of her time of incarceration. It was the acknowledgement and ownership that was refreshing.

"So, I was thinking maybe we can do it again." Daniela suggested, a light blush gracing her cheeks. "As friends as I know you're not interested in me like that." She said backpedalling and protecting herself by not assuming anything was happening between them. "But we had fun, we should go dancing again. I mean only if you're interested and free." She told him.

"Give me your phone." He told her, Daniela pulled out her mobile phone and passed it over to him. He imput his number and called the number. His phone vibrated in his pocket and he ended the call before it hit voice mail. "Now we have each other's numbers. I'll call and see if we can find the time." he said as he handed her phone back to her.

"Ok." She said with a brilliant smile.

"Goodnight, Daniela." Meylan told her.

"Goodnight." She replied, she stood where she was and watched him walk away. He took two steps away from her before thinking better of it. He turned on his feet and strode back to her. He cupped her face with his hands and slid one slowly around the back of her neck. She tilted her head up as he lowered his lips to hers in a long and warm kiss.

"I'll call you tomorrow." He told her before he brushed his lips over hers with one more gentle kiss. He pulled back and smiled at her. She looked at him completely enthralled to the point she was speechless. He released her without a word and walked off into the night.