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CONTAINS M/M SLASH. THERE'S EVENTUAL MPREG.

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Full Summary:

when Dean dies he find himself only wanting his brother to return to him but he's stuck working with two angels to help find a way to bring him back whilst dodging the angels of heaven. There was supposed to be an apocalypse but the two claim the issue has divided the angels and that they are at war with each other because of it. So now instead of giving up hunting like the grieving hunter wants to, he is driven across the country, with more or less little sleep trying to prevent an all out war in heaven. If that wasn't complicated enough Sam feels himself falling for the one fallen angel called Castiel. Alternate timeline. SASTIEL

*CHAPTER SIX*

Sam woke up screaming for the fifth time that night and Cas soothed him back into sleep easily enough. It would have been easier to just knock him out like Gabriel suggested after the third time but Cas didn't want to hurt him. Sam went through hell and was still going through things he shouldn't have to witness. He could have been violated as well so Cas just let Sam go back into a troubling slumber, his hands fisting his trench coat.

"You do realize he's going to be upset if you leave him alone now. He'll be so worried if you leave for even a minute-"

"Leave Gabriel."

Once that angel was gone, he woke Sam up seeing as it was seven thirty and he would probably be waking up once again soon enough. Sam awoke with a start and whimpered, pressing against Cas once again. Cas sighed and patted his back until Sam was alert enough to realize what he did and backed up a little bit. He still held on to the trench coat though. Cas sighed and knew Sam wasn't going to like this.

"I'm going to negate the demon blood in your system," Cas told him.

Sam looked at him in bewilderment.

"What are you going to do to do that?" Cas sighed.

He saw the dried caked on blood smeared over Sam's face and more dried blood on his shirt. He needed a shower and fresh clothes. He also needed to get over the fact that he was almost hurt badly. He was fine now and nothing would get to him if Cas could help it. He wouldn't let them.

"I'm going to teach you how to control the powers you do have and if that doesn't work, I'll try something else. But for now I'm going to hope that you could get the gist of it and that the other thing doesn't have to be used. It could be somewhat painful," he waivered seeing as how Sam's eyes went wide at the thought of pain. He brought his hand through the soft floppy hair and wondered if Sam was ever going to get over the fact that he had been tortured. Maybe if he erased that but he wasn't going to do it yet. First he had to teach him how to fight. That was how he was going to negate the bad thing that happened to him.

"What do you want me to do?" Sam asked and Cas could still see all the blood. He still had a little on his trench coat, not that it would change anything but he decided he didn't want to see it on Sam anymore.

"Get a shower and then we'll start. Okay?" Sam nodded and grabbed some clothes from his bag. He looked over his shoulder a couple of times like he kept thinking that Cas was going to leave.

He knew it was going to take a lot more to get this out of his head and for now, Cas was content on just staying on the bed and waiting for him to get done. He heard the shower turn on and grabbed his phone from his pocket. Bobby was going to hate the update but he knew the man wanted one regardless so he wasn't going to disappoint.

"Yeah? If this is Castiel give the phone over to your buddy angels or more importantly Sam since it's fricking ten at night and you don't have any concept for anything."

"Sam's in the shower and the others are doing things at the moment," Cas told him calmly. "He should be almost done though. That's not the reason I called though."

"Yeah, Gabriel gave me the update at a reasonable time, you jack ass," Bobby sounded miserable. "Anyways how is he doing now that he has been ripped open with a knife-"

"He's doing better," Cas quickly told him. "I'm going to help him through it Bobby, you have my word."

He heard a snort in the other line and knew that Bobby blamed them for Sam getting hurt in the first place. Still he wasn't going to let him think he didn't care about Sam. He did and if it took him until the war had been fought, then he was going to.

"Just make sure you boys are proper and that you keep yourself from having a go at it with Sam. Remember he's vulnerable so-"

"I get it. He needs to be married-"

"You should hear yourself talk sometimes. But yeah, don't do anything that I wouldn't."

Bobby hung up just as Sam got out, already dressed and the lack of dried blood on his face made Cas smile. He didn't like him being hurt and he couldn't explain it but he felt a twinge in his chest every time he thought about it. It didn't help the fact that he felt something different every time he looked at him either. It was enough to make him stick around to find out what that was. Sam went back to the bed and looked at him, not wanting to start a staring contest with him since he knew he wasn't going to ever out beat the angel in it.

"Cas can you close your eyes for a second please?"

Cas did as he was asked and when he opened it, Sam's face was hovering really close like he was going to kiss him, but he didn't He simply thought this was annoying and would have closed the gap if he didn't think it would scare Sam off but he noticed the angel no longer had his eyes closed and that didn't seem to bother him. Sam was too mysterious in just about everything and this was something he wasn't expecting when he came up with the idea of ending the apocalypse before it even started.

"Why are you hovering like this? You either want to kiss me or you are working up the courage to do so," Cas told him and Sam didn't retreat but he didn't really seem all that happy of the fact that was dredged up either.

"I'm thinking if you would even let me," Sam admitted. "I know what Bobby tells you and you want it to be proper but it stopped since that demon forced his on me using Dean's face. I know you are still used to the old times too but nowadays kisses aren't very special unless someone makes it out to be. Everyone kisses another warm body and they definitely have sex and all that without being married. That's how we get teen pregnancies."

"Do you want it to be special?" Cas asked and he saw Sam's lip quirk upwards in a smile. He felt a flutter in his heart at this one thing and still wondered how he could feel that. He was an angel and this shouldn't be happening but he didn't dislike this. If anything he felt all fuzzy and warm inside thanks to this.

"Yeah, I want it to be special," Sam told him with a small smile. "I want to kiss you."

That declaration wasn't loss on Cas and he found himself looking at him as though he could tell what his intentions were by looking into his soul. He couldn't find any evil intent by this and Sam was far from pure with everything he had to go through in his childhood and losing Dean was another thing that made him lose his innocence. Nothing was going to take that back either but he could give back anything he could and would if it were possible. That one thing he wouldn't deny.

"Okay," Cas told him. "If you feel it would be special for you, then by all means."

The kiss was slow and sensual but not in the least bit not special. Cas found himself responding to it with an enthusiasm so unlike him. He found himself nibbling on Sam's bottom lip until he was granted entrance and then the kiss turned passionate and Cas wondered why he hadn't done this before. Millions of things exploded through his head and he pulled away after a moment, realizing he had closed his eyes. Leaning forward again, he fell onto Sam although the younger Winchester didn't seem to mind and started to kiss him on the mouth once again. He pulled away after another minute and noticed that he was definitely liking this.

"Was this special to you?" Sam nodded and he found himself smiling. "This was my first kiss."

Sam smiled even brighter and Cas stood up and helped Sam to sit at the end of the bed. He was confused a bit but calmed down when Cas kissed him on the nose. Cas seemed to have that effect on a lot of people although he didn't know why and Sam didn't hesitate in trusting him so blindly which resulted in him getting hurt. He couldn't allow that to happen.

"I'm going to teach you how to use telekinesis first okay? You did it before but you refused to let it develop further maybe because you thought it was evil but regardless of anything, you need to let it out now."

Sam nodded.

"If you can't we'll try the alternative although I'd like to keep from trying that for a while. Is that okay?"

Sam nodded again and Cas sat back pointing to various objects that he found around the room.

"I want you to concentrate on one of them and when you feel the pull, instead of fighting it I want to you let it pull. Pull along with it, not against it okay?"

Sam tried, he did but even when he began to see the change, he was reminded of what the other children had become and let out a gasp, causing the thing to drop, and ended the whole process. He tried multiple different times where the object only hovered a little and then dropped. He never went past that certain point and Cas sighed before moving forward again.

"Instead of thinking of what you could be when that happens, think about this." Sam's eyes widened until Cas drew him into another short chaste kiss, making Sam calm down and his heart to start racing at the same time. He let his eyes close so he could feel this, deepening the passion until Cas backed up and Sam quickly hid the little bit of disappointment he felt.

"Okay try again."

Sam did.

There was that pull and he went along with it like Cas said to and at the point where he usually jammed up and let go, he reminded himself that Cas wouldn't allow him to become that and it went to higher heights then he ever felt possible. He smiled when he let it drop and Cas pulled him into a soft kiss again, leaving his forehead touching his after he broke it.

"Did you like your reward?"

Sam found himself nodding against him.

"If I get this every time we practice, I'll become a pro."

Cas smiled.

"As nice as that is I know I didn't want to do this but you'll have an easier time if I combat the demon blood so that you won't become hungry for it. I think that it would be best after all."

Sam didn't know what it was but he trusted him. He closed his eyes when Cas put his hand through his hair and let out an easy breath when one hand rested upon his forehead whilst the other was at the back of his head as though Cas thought he would faint. He snapped his eyes opened but the look Cas sent him made him feel comfortable again. He could say it would hurt like hell and yet Sam found himself knowing that it wasn't going to be bad when he woke up.

"Are you ready?" he asked and Sam knew he didn't even know what he wanted but decided it would be better not knowing so that he couldn't lock up or anything.

"Yeah."

He saw a whole bunch of light before he went unconscious. He mused that it hadn't hurt and yet he couldn't feel anything beyond the sudden warmth before he slumped forward into Cas's arms. Cas laid him back and looked at him, seeing that he was laying peaceably for the first time in a while.

"Sleep well Sam."

Was it wrong to think that maybe he would enjoy thinking of himself as Sam's friend? He didn't know but he found himself smile at the thought. He liked to think that.

"So what are we doing in Nebraska again?" Gabriel was very impatient and Sam couldn't blame him. It was a bit cold after all and it was raining. Who wouldn't hate the rain when it came down in torrents along with lightning? He bit his lip to keep from sounding his fear when a crackle of thunder sounded. It made him look ridiculous and he didn't want them thinking he was a wimp. Cas seemed to see through it and hurriedly got them a room at the hotel as soon as he saw no one was around.

"We are looking for a lead and by we, I mean Balthazar and I."

Gabriel rolled his eyes and almost missed when Cas pulled Sam in for a kiss before leaving them with the room key. Gabriel arched his eye brows and let out a 'hmm' when he saw that the younger Winchester was blushing. He couldn't help it, he laughed and saw the kid turn redder just at the thought. Maybe he could have fun baiting him but a part of him was still worried about the future. He sighed once they were in the room and saw it was a double. Cas did think of everything though and that shouldn't surprise him much. What he was doing with Sam however did.

"You do realize that Cas is going to erase him from your mind once you get your brother back right? He could fall head over heels in love with you and that won't change a thing so if you have feelings at all for him, I'd stop it while you could before it becomes too late. All we need is a love sick human when we're trying to stop Armageddon."

Sam looked over, deep in thought before collapsing on the bed. Gabriel just looked over in humor until he realized something he should have picked up on before and frowned. His brother was going to get a huge smack down once he got back since he should have consulted them before he gave some of his own grace up for the Winchester. He should have known though since his telekinesis since then had been weakened considerably and even though Cas was mad as hell about it, he told them not to worry and that it probably wasn't a big deal. Hell it was! He gave some of that up to Sam Fucking Winchester!

"He gave you some of his grace," Gabriel commented seeing the form stiffen at that. He smirked inwardly but right now he knew this was serious. "You know what happens when an angel gives up even a little bit of their grace?"

Sam sat up now interested and Gabriel would have laughed had he not thought about how close they were getting. He almost thought it was unfair because even though Sam wouldn't remember, Cas would and it was really unfair for the Winchester to use that to his advantage. It was something a cold heartless bastard would do and yet he had the feeling that Sam didn't know this.

"Well they give up a little of themselves. Take the amount he gave you for instance. He greatly weakened his own telekinetic powers by doing that and that doesn't stop there. If he were to become human, he'd have to give up everything and there's no way he would so why the hell is he doing this for you?"

Sam sat shocked wondering the same thing. Did he think that he wanted this to happen? He didn't even know what it was and only let him because he trusted him. He glared when Gabriel pulled him into his view and he could tell the angel was mad as well. He couldn't stop that but it didn't mean he had to take it silently.

"I never wanted him to do that for me," Sam quickly told him. "He said there was something he could do to combat the demon blood and he didn't say what it was going to be and just asked if I trusted him. If I had known, I wouldn't have let him do that-"

"Right and it's not like you're the first to be taken by little Castiel," Gabriel sobered up at the thought. "Not many know this but we don't have a great track record when it comes to humans. I fell in love and hell Balthazar had loved someone great in the past as well. The part that scares me is that Cas can't turn his off and he is going to end up off the deep end. What do you think is going to happen if he were to love you wholeheartedly and give you your brother? He's still going to take your memory from you and he will have all the memories. You won't but he'll always remember Sam and if you want to be selfish fine but don't let that be something you do because he doesn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve the pain-"

"What if he didn't take the memories though?" Gabriel stopped and actually laughed.

"But Sam he promised Bobby he would so he is going to whether you like it or not. The major difference though is if you decide to back the hell away or cause him to suffer for everything he's ever done for you."

Sam looked more than shocked and more than upset but Gabriel didn't give any room for any what ifs. He was way past that and now he gave the Winchester his warning. He knew that the kid was going to feel deeply upset and he was surprised to find that he cared more for his brother than he did about this kid. He wasn't really surprised though, not really. Castiel may be a pain in the ass but he would fight to protect him even if all went south and he knew something would happen to him by doing it. That was something that Sam had to realize though and it wasn't like he was intentionally being mean to the kid. He knew that Cas cared about him greatly though and he knew if the Winchester felt even an inkling of the same thing he would not try anything no matter what.

Love hurt so it wasn't meant to be fair.