Disclaimer: I don't own St Trinian's
Once Carnaby had finished crying like a little girl, while Kelly watched skeptically, he struggled to compose himself. After all, he was Carnaby Fritton; suave, sophisticated, charming, handsome... at least, that was how he viewed himself. After all, he reasoned in his mind, why else would everyone look at him as he strutted down the street, shaking his hips? Why would people choke on their champagne if he blew them a kiss? They were obviously so flattered.
That's it! Carnaby thought ecstatically. I don't know why I didn't think of it before! I can make this girl- Kasey or Lily or something- fall in love with me! THEN she'll let me go!
And with that, Carnaby flashed her with what he thought was a charming smile. "Well, Helloooo..." He purred. "I didn't notice how... ravishing you are. I'm sure that if we sort this whole, silly feud out I can make it worth your while..." He trailed off, cocking an eyebrow and winking at Kelly. "If you get my drift!"
Kelly's jaw dropped, and she made a disgusted sound.
A moment later, Carnaby was flying backwards into the wall.
Okay! He thought to himself in frustration, as he rubbed his sore and bruised back. Maybe that didn't work. Huh- there must be something wrong with that girl. Everyone loves Carnaby Fritton! Even men!
But Carnaby had to come up with a new plan to get out, and he knew that. Lucky I'm so smart. He thought smugly, even though he was entirely wrong.
Then he let out another high pitched scream when he realised that Kelly was standing over him.
"Try that again and you're dead!" She growled threateningly.
Carnaby's lip trembled, but he forced it to stop, biting back another outburst of girlish sobs.
"Now look here, Lily!" he announced in a falsely brave voice, standing up in a stance that he thought resembled a prize fighter.
It didn't.
"My name's KELLY." Kelly glared at him. "Say it wrong again, and you're dead..."
"I don't need any threats from YOU, missy." Carnaby yelled, curling his hands into fists and rotating them. He began stupidly jumping about, tossing his fists into air. "I was a white belt in Karate!" He hoped desperately that this would impress Kelly- after all, surely she didn't know the system of belts in martial arts! A white belt was, in fact, the lowest belt you could get- and Carnaby had been a pathetic white belt, being kicked out after one week of lessons due to the fact that he screamed loudly any time anyone made a fist near him, irritating the instructor. Still, he hoped that this information would throw the Kelly girl a bit, and then he could make his escape.
Instead, she snorted.
"A white belt?" she scoffed. "Please. I was a black belt at age ten." There was no hint of deception on her face, and Carnaby gulped. However, he tried to hide it and seem macho.
"Oh yeah?" he tossed his head. "Put 'em up!"
"If you insist." Kelly gave him an evil smile, and with a lazy flick of her fist, Carnaby was thrown back into the wall. Kelly was unable to suppress her laughter.
In life, we are supposed to learn the consequences of our actions. Most people will realise their mistakes and learn from them, but Carnaby Fritton was not that type. As his back was re-aquainted with the hard wall in his cell, he began instantly thinking of another plan. He watched as Kelly pressed a button on a small headset mouth-and-ear piece.
"Hey, Belle." She muttered into the microphone by her mouth. "My shift's almost over. Send Bianca up to watch on the Anti-Fritton. I'll leave the headset for her."
Carnaby's ears pricked up, and he watched as Kelly slipped the headset from her ear, shaking out her short-ish black hair before she opened the door a crack.
"I'm leaving, and I'm LOCKING THE DOOR." Kelly snarled. "Your next guard should be here in five minutes or less, so you won't be able to escape somehow in the meantime. And this door is concrete and metal, so you can't break it down." And then she disappeared through the small crack of light, and Carnaby was left alone.
Instantly, he dived for the headset, pressing the red button on it.
"Yes, Kel?" Annabelle's voice picked up. "Bianca's coming, she's just getting her tongs."
Carnaby shuddered. He then forced his voice to sound exactly like Kelly's voice- if, by any chance, Kelly's voice sounded like Carnaby holding his nose (which it didn't). "Belle?" He imitated. "This is Kasey- Kelly, I mean. Kelly..." Carnaby struggled to remember the girl's last name. "...Kelly Phones. I think you should let the handsome devil out, because he's so handsome that I love him. Let him out!"
Annabelle snorted. "Nice try, moron." she said sarcastically, and then with a crackle, the transmission ended.
"Yes, well... You were an UGLY BABY!" Carnaby yelled down the headset, despite the fact that Annabelle had already gone.
"Oi."
Carnaby looked up to see that the door had opened, and the masculine looking, dark-skinned girl that Carnaby had seen earlier was standing in the dim light from outside whatever the cell was, thick rods of metal in her hands- obviously what she called her 'tongs'. "If you put one step outta line," She boomed. "Then I'm gonna have to stick these where the the sun don't shine."
Carnaby whimpered slightly. This girl doesn't seem to be in love with me like the others! He thought, extremely shocked. As the girl glared at him menacingly, Carnaby let out a tiny squeak that sounded oddly like "Mummy!"
This was torture. Absolute torture. Carnaby had to stick a fist in his mouth to stop himself from screaming loudly at the pain. However, after hours, he couldn't help himself.
"Please- please stop!" he whimpered.
Bianca rolled her eyes. "Why do you think I should listen to you?" she snarled.
Carnaby once again tried to make himself seem alluring. "Well, I could make it worth your-" But before he could say the word "while", Bianca waved her tongs threateningly and Carnaby shut up. But the agonising torture did not cease, and he shook as it continued...
Rap music.
The Bianca girl had brought a boom-box, and now Rap music was reverberating around Carnaby's cell. Carnaby, who was used to either classical, orchestral music or flamboyant 80s songs (his secret vice) could not handle the sound of a man shouting loudly and a thudding beat- it caused his delicate yet slightly sticking-out ears absolute agony, and he wanted to scream but knew that if he did, Bianca would stick her tongs "Where the moon didn't sparkle", or whatever it was that she'd said. (In fact she'd said "Where the sun don't shine," but Carnaby couldn't be bothered remembering things like that."
So he tried to take the pain of the rap music that Bianca was playing, and was highly relieved when it grinded to a halt, revealing that Bianca's shift was over. She gave disgruntled mutterings at not being able to use her tongs. Carnaby had still not given up on the "in love" factor on the great escape but he was rather pathetically planning. He put what he considered a heartbreaking, smouldering expression on his face and struck what he considered a "sexy" pose as the door opened for the girl who was taking over the shift as his captor.
"Hello," he purred seductively.
"You are DISGUSTING!" snapped a voice from the shadows, and a girl stepped into the light.
Carnaby's heart sank.
"Oh no..." he squeaked as the disgusted girl approached him.
It was Annabelle.