Ch13: Pineapples

(Wednesday, M+1, D+18)

(AN: I've decided to use an Earth-like calendar, with the same setup but not necessarily using Earth months unless that system is canon. But with regards to an Earth calendar, Kurt arrived on Remnant Friday, September 1st.)

After a few hours 'borrowing' part of Signal's forges, my new projects were finished.

*Happy whistling*

I gather my three new creations, three of each. 'Time for field testing.' *BAMF* I bamf home.

"Hey there Zwei, how are you? Little lonely, huh? Sorry, I'm not here to play with you. But everyone else should be getting out of class soon." I say, scratching him behind the ears before dropping off two of each of my inventions and picking up Blue Death, along with extra ammo.

I bamf to the Eversnow Forest, an area that is somehow eternally winter. I don't know why and I honestly don't care. I'm here because I want to test out some high-explosive treats on beowolves.

'Ohey. Time for fun.' I spot a small pack of beowolves, ten-ish total.

"FRAG OUT!" I shout, lobbing a roughly fist-shaped green object slightly smaller than a soda can into the middle of the pack.

*BANG* The grenade detonates, sending shrapnel scything through the pack, finishing off what the overpressure wave hadn't pulped. Technically it was a fragmentation grenade with a larger than normal explosive payload, thanks to use of Blast Dust, a combination of Burn Dust and Earth Dust, along with a few other substances added for stabilization and increased explosive potential.

"Killionaire." I say, searching out another pack. Soon after, I find one, about the same size as the last.

"Let's try another one." I mutter, tossing another object of similar size, but colored blue.

*KRACK* with a crunching-crackling noise, everything in a roughly three-yard circle froze solid and was covered in a jagged layer of ice at least an inch or two thick.

A smile spread across my face and I used the frozen Beowolves as target practice. Surprisingly enough, although it really shouldn't have been, the Bewolves were fully alive and conscious. Were.

'Next problem: how do I set up the next one?' I think, setting up my next surprise just inside the entrance to a nearby cave, facing towards the entrance.

And then I did what was probably the dumbest thing I had ever done up to that point.

I found the biggest pack of beowolves I could. And I pissed them off. And then I ran. Fast.

"SONUVABBIIIITTTTTCCCHHHHHH!" I shout, running as fast as I can (mostly thanks to mortal terror) to reach the cave, while trying not to either outrun or be eaten by the pack following me. 'There's the cave. Just a bit further. Now.' *BAMF* "HEY! COME AND GET ME!" I shout at the Beowolves from within the safety of the cave. I watch them charge the cave. Trying not to be utterly terrified. 'Three… Two… One... ' *Click* I press the wireless detonator in my hand. *BANG* With an almost underwhelming noise, the claymore landmine I placed near the entrance shreds pretty much all of the Beowolves with a hail of steel balls. I finish off the stragglers which had the dubious luck of being outside of the killzone. *BAMF* "I'm back!" I call out, grabbing my cleaning kit and a mat.

"Where were you?" Yang asks, walking into my room.

"In the forge at Signal, then in the Eversnow Forest. You people REALLY need to work on your naming conventions by the way." I say, whistling as I strip Blue Death and clean it.

"What were you doing in the forest?" She asked.

"Testing what I made in the forge."

"What did you make in the forge?"

"Things that go boom."

"You made explosives in a school forge?"

"Yes."

"And you're keeping them in your room."

"In a metal box designed to resist explosives, and yes."

"Alright." She paused. "What kind of explosives?"

"Two types of hand grenade and anti-infantry landmines."

"Meaning?"
"A thrown explosive and a placed explosive designed to turn anything with light or no armor into dead."

"Why?"

"There are few problems that cannot be solved with explosives." I say happily, reassembling Blue Death. "This is my rifle, there are many like it but this one is mine."

Yang looks at me weirdly for a second before ignoring my last words, still getting used to the things I say from Earth. "Dad wants us in the family room, by the way." She says.

"Just a sec." I say, checking Blue Death to make sure everything is working how it should. "Let's go then." I smile, walking out with Yang in tow.

Taiyang and Ruby are sitting on a couch in the family room. Taiyang is wearing his usual expression of relaxed happiness. Ruby, on the other hand, is as hyped up as a squirrel on drugs. Even more than usual, if that's actually possible.

"Yang, Kurt, sit down. I have some very important news for you." Taiyang says.

I sit down on the couch next to Yang, who is sitting next to Ruby.

"I've been thinking this past week." Taoyang says, "About you, Kurt. You've been staying with us for a month." 'Bad feeling. Baaad feeling.' "You've almost come to be a part of the family, wouldn't you say?"

"This place is pretty much home to me." I say, getting a vague idea of where this was going.

"Since you don't have one of your own, and since I don't think you'll be leaving anytime soon; I've decided to make you an official part of this family, Kurt Xiao Long Wagner."

"Thanks dad." I say, as Ruby and Yang squeal in happiness.

A second later I notice Ruby standing up, before she tackle-hugs me.

"Welcome to the family, Kurt." She says, every part the adorable child.

"Best. Family. Ever." I say,chuckling, "Of all time."