One day, all these cards started falling from the sky, like rain, or frogs. Together with my friends on an awesome Twilight forum, we created a FAR-OUT game, and for a while it seemed like harmless nonsensical fun. But on National Bakugan Day when the beasts within started slapfighting, we knew they weren't harmless.
My name's Dan. Together with my friends Runo, Marucho, Julie, not to mention (SHUN IS NOT APPEARING IN THIS EPISODE AND DOESN'T DESERVE TO BE MENTIONED -Editor), and Alice, we are...the Bakugan Battle Brawlers!
Bakugan! One goal, two worlds!
A, a-a, a-a, TWO worlds COL-LIDE! On the inside! Gone, gone, gone, this is Bakugan!
Episode Four
The Wrath of Sugarnoid
To further elaborate on last episode's happenings...
"To win, you have to throw me in a lake. Bonus points if you act like you hate me!"
"Ooh! BONUS points! I HATE YOU!!" He threw Drago in the lake. "IT'S OVER!!!!! Do I win yet?"
Having landed next to the car Drago shouted, "YES!! YOU WON!! THANK GOD YOU BLUBLUBLUB..." He dipped under.
Later that night...
"You're KIDDING!" Alice gasped, saying something mildly interesting for once. "You threw Drago into the river? Is that why you're so grouchy today?"
"I always HATED Drago! Nothing grouchy about it! Just HATE!!" Dan screeched.
"Don't you think you should go back into the deep, dirty river and get Drago out of there?"
"Why would I when I HATE him?"
"Think of him as a bully from school. You get into a fight and drown him on accident."
"Yeah, but he's a BULLY. YOU DON'T LIKE HIM."
"Yeah, but you will forever live with the guilt of drowning a man. Plus, you'd get arrested."
"But marbles don't die." He pouted. "It's not even manslaughter."
"Guess you never realize what you've got until it's gone," Runo said. "Me and my Halo Tiger are as close as close can be, you know!"
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!! YOU HAVE PEACH FUZZ!! SHAVE IT OFF!! SHAVE IT OOOFFFFFFFFF..."
Dan was about to tell his pals he was lying about hating Drago when his voice reappeared in his mind!
"Bonus points if you act like you hate me!" Dan thought. He rolled onto his bed and groaned, "Who needs Drago? I can buy my pudding at the store."
I wanna keep those bonus points,
"Don't say that!" Runo said in a whiny voice.
"Besides, I have Keroro and Tamama," he mumbled. "Right, guys? -"
"Dan, come back!" Marucho cried. "Oh no...he has gone into the deepest depths of his own imagination! He really believes those Keroro Gunsou action figures are talking to him! We GOTTA get him back!"
Under the lake...
It was still nighttime at Bridge Lake. Underwater, a fish jabbed its lower lip ferociously at Drago, who was sitting on a rock. This ferocious poking made Drago open and scream a scream which sounded something like this, only without the "Dracula" part. It was pretty much the same, though. The fish sucked him into his mouth, then spat him into some sort of current. "WhuwhuWWWOOOOAAAAHHHHH!!!" he cried as he spiraled through it.
The next day at school...
In the hallway, he met up with Suchi and Akuma. "Hey, Dan, wanna battle?"
"NO." He continued walking into the classroom.
Dan threw his backpack onto the desk. "I hate Drago THIS MUCH!!!" He looked around, then punched it a couple of times. Before he could stick his tongue out at it and cross his arms, he heard commotion in the corner of the room.
"OOOOOOOH AAAAAAH OOOOOOOH AAAAAH," the class moaned, staring at the blue-and-white Sega Station Portable, or SSP. It was an obvious ripoff of the PSP. Sega consoles would never get back into the market.
"And then you do THIS and THIS! And then you unlock THIS so you can even do THIS!" Rodney showed off his mad skillz.
"Incredible!" Ulysses Barnes stared, completely mesmerized.
"Hey, Rodney," Dan said, stepping forward. "I never knew you were into Bakugan."
"This isn't Bakugan. And I'm not even into the game. But sure, I have a couple of marbles I could use..." He smirked. Dan backed away, cringing.
"You're not ready for Bakugan, huh? It's a MAN'S game. And obviously, you're not, CHICKEN."
"I played it once or twice. Not interested. It's so straightforward, I mean...I could basically explain the whole game right now. You add power, your opponent takes away power, you add power, your opponent takes away power, you battle, the one with the most power wins."
"Hey! It's much more complex than that! Sometimes your opponent can add power, too."
"Well, in reality..." Rodney flicked his hair back and put his elbow on the desk. "Ya see, Bakugan isn't tactical at all. It's all about power levels, really. The Bakugan with the least power are useless compared to others. So in reality, all you need are six marbles of each element. Throw the enemy's weakness out and you win almost every time.
"And sure, you could argue that there are Counters and Traps and what-not. but that's also in another game called Yu-Gi-Oh, which has MUCH more strategy by comparison. Monsters in it not only have power, or Attack Points, but also Defense Points, You can hide your monsters until they're attacked. You never know when somebody will thwart your plan, or when they pull out the winning card to end the Duel. It's much more intense."
"...Yeah, but does your Yu-Gi-Oh game have marbles?"
"No."
"Hmph! You just got OWNED!!"
"But marbles don't-"
"Hey, everyone! Yu-Gi-Oh doesn't have marbles! Let's laugh at him for liking it! HAW HAW!"
"You're an idiot!" a short bald kid named Angelo pointed out.
"Hey, this guy's reasoning skills are incredible!" Leg Armstrong said in a weird, nasally voice. He had a star on his green jersey. "He could beat you at just about anything!"
"Rrrrrgh...HATING DRAGO HAS MADE ME ANGRY!!" Dan growled. "There's one thing you CAN'T beat me at -- BAKUGAN!!"
"Why would I want to? What's making me fight you?" Rodney said coolly. "Besides, you're retarded. You hardly stand a chance." He tipped his glasses.
"OOH," Martin hissed. "He's badass."
"You can fight me anytime, anyplace, and get your CATS handed to ya!" Dan boasted.
"OOH," Martin hissed. "He's dumb."
"Shut up, you, you...reasonable guy! That's it! If I get bonus points for hating Drago, I get bonus points for hating the WORLD!!" He gave Rodney a little shove.
"Uhh...ouch."
Everybody gasped! "He's a criminal, I tells ya! A CRIMINAL!!" Cassandra ran around, flailing her arms.
"Aw, NOW look what you've done...Super Monkey Ball 4 Extreme Jr. Deluxe Adventure Touch & Roll Banana Blitz Inferno The Next Generation just restarted itself! You should be ashamed of yourself." Rodney glared at him.
"Look what you've done!" Stan shouted. "You just messed up his Super Monkey Ball game! How's the monkey supposed to get all the bananas NOW, punk?"
"Terrible sportsmanship, man," Leg Armstrong agreed.
"I hardly even touched him! It was just a little shove!"
"But I loved that monkey so much..." Momochi, the little pink-haired girl in the back, had tears in her eyes.
"Gotta go to the bathroom!" Dan rushed out of the room.
"...What's he gotta go to the bathroom for?" Leg asked. Everybody collectively shrugged.
That evening...
It was yet another beautiful sunset. The train was functioning well...again. Dan sat in his chair and started up his computer. This time, the chatboxes WEREN'T on his screen. He opened up the PC version of...Mega Man X7! "Now to fight some Flame Hyenard," he said, smirking. "I can hate Drago but I couldn't hate YOU!" He plugged in an old-fashioned video game controller and started playing.
"Hek...Agh...it...it HURTS...Oh, it's YOU that's causing my suffering! Then if I tear you to pieces, the pain will stop!" After hearing Hi-Nard say those raspy lines, Dan was PUMPED to hear him speak again!
And then the sound on his computer shut off as the battle started.
"Wha...? WHAT A RIPOFF!! Now I AM angry at you, Flame Hyenard!" He slammed his fist on the Sleep Mode button, now enraged. He ran away and tripped onto his bed. "It's even worse than Drago! Wait, what am I saying...? I HATE Drago! A lot!"
Wherever Rodney lives...
Good, I didn't lose any important data, he thought, turning on Super Monkey Ball 4 Extreme Jr. Deluxe Adventure Touch & Roll Banana Blitz Inferno The Next Generation. Is it so wrong to know so much about a game I don't even like?
"Hey," the computer greeted.
"WOAH!!" Rodney shook around wildly. "Wasn't expecting THAT. Who are you!?" A bright light emanated from the screen, surrounding everything and anything in its path! "Aah! It's twice as bright through my glasses!"
"I...am Mask the Money. Join me and gain ultimate power."
"No...I'm too genre-savvy to fall for that one..."
"Oh, but you will..."
The next day...
People walked along the strangely-empty street, jibberjabbering about the crap going on in their daily lives. Dan approached the school posse.
"Hey, it's Dan!" Leg pointed out, still wearing his Keroro Gunsou jersey.
"THIS oughta be good," Martin the reasonable guy said.
"Hey," Dan said loudly, "where's Rodney?"
"Oh, he's, uhh...back there." Leg pointed at the far side of the sidewalk with his thumb.
"Oh." Dan slowly turned around. Rodney was standing there, looking all emo and stuff. Something else about him looked suspiciously...suspicious. "So Rodney, I-"
"LET'S BATTLE RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!" Rodney's voice had deepened, his mouth enlarged with smiling rage. Red speed lines flashed in the background, and the animators couldn't help but replay the same static image zooming upwards over and over again for a while.
"If you're gonna be that way...come 'n' get it!" Dan smiled and stood there.
Rodney sluggishly walked across the street. A car ran over him. He just laid on his face for a second, then slowly got back up with a demented grin.
"H-huh!?" He's almost as hard to beat up as me...! Almost!
"I'm a chicken if I like Yu-Gi-Oh, huh?" He held a purple gauntlet to Dan's throat and whispered, "I can play your games too."
"A-a Bakugantlet!"
"That's right," he whispered. "I've had a little deal with Mask the Money recently. Look into my eyes and tell me...is there a difference?"
Dan did so. "They look alrightHOly! They're the same shade of blue as...as...Mask the Money's!"
"That's right, you pitiful, pitiful fool."
"B-b-but...he's the enemy!"
"He is no enemy...with these glasses I see the world in a different light. This shade of blue...reflects the sadness and adversity of human life. How we can change that by removing a soul from happiness' delicate balance."
"N-no...killing someone won't make it right! Rodney, you have to take those glasses off! Take them off!"
"No!" His voice was raised. "Never! I see this world in its true light, and now I see...that we cannot have a perfect world with you in our way, Daniel."
"This can't be! I don't deserve..."
Rodney stepped back, blue glasses glaring. "Now I kill you...with my marbles. Field Open." As a dumb example of how time stopped, a kid was about to smack a soccer ball out of the goal.
Now they were in Sub-Terra, I GUESS. Dan was smiling, for some reason.
"And as a perfect world cannot be achieved with you," Rodney said, "it cannot be achieved with your possessions. I set the Doom Card." A purple pulse pulsed through the arena.
"Gate Card, Set!" They both threw down Gate Cards, which made a magical sound effect upon landing. They landed from a large height, for some reason.
"Bakugan Stand. And I refuse to call out these stupid commands any longer." He tossed a marble rather lightly, though it still landed safely and revealed a huge Marcus knight with a shield and large claw! He tried to stab Dan, who jumped REALLY high in the air and dodged the attack.
"What's the data on this thing!?"
"FEARRIPPER. POWER LEVEL 320 G'S. NO OTHER DATA AVAILABLE."
"What a stupid computer! Gate Card Set! Bakugan Stand!" A large crab appeared on the field, who was only to be known as Crabby Pirate.
"Heh. You shouldn't try that with me, Daniel." He set a Gate Card, then lightly tossed out a Giant Black Mantis! Yep, another recolor. "And I activate the Ability Card Marionette."
"WRRROOOOOO!!" Purple energy strings appeared on Giant Black Mantis' scythe-arm-things. The tips surrounded the crab, who proceeded to levitate into the air. He was then dropped onto the ground. So much potential awesomeness...wasted!
"Oh no...Fat Crab!"
FATALITY, a voice echoed.
"What was that!?"
"Oh, that was just something Masquerade programmed into the Doom card whenever a Bakugan goes to the Doom Dimension."
"Oh...well, THAT'LL get annoying fast!"
Giant Black Mantis had dealt the finishing blow, knocking Fat Crab into Rodney's enormous mouth! His belly grew quite large for a second, quickly digesting the marble into fluids...and passing it through to the Doom Dimension.
"Pirate Gamera Sugarnoid, Stand!"
Giant Black Mantis stepped forward. The red palette swap turtle barked. The stage was set to battle. Gamera leaped up and bit it on the neck like the dog he was. They fell backwards and into a pile of dust that suddenly appeared.
"I activate Doom Companion." Rodney grinned as the card broke apart and flew into an overhead portal, sparkling. Both of the monsters flew up into it, presumably being brought to the afterlife.
"No! Sugarnoid! SUGARNOOOOOOOOOOOOOID!"
"Meh." Fearripper shrugged. "Couldn't be helped." He sounded like a bored teenager, surprisingly.
"I realized it was time for those two to go to the afterlife. So it is for you, and when I finish battling with these marbles I will kill you the first chance I get. It's the quickest way."
"What are you saying!? Murder is bad! Unless it's human euthanizing!"
"Then it's humane euthanizing."
"Oh, well...that's okay, then. Robotic Pirate Ultra! You're the only marble I have left! Urgh!" He tossed the marble much more lightly than usual. It rolled VERY slowly toward the field. "OHHHHHH..." he said as it came near. Seeing that it barely missed the target, his voice gradually lowered as he said, "Ohhhhhhh." He ran over to the marble, put it in the middle of the field area, and ran away like it was a firework waiting to explode. It exploded...WITH LIIIIIGHT! It became a palette swap! "Ability Card, Activate! Robotic Pirate Ultra Reinforcement!" He ran back over to the Bakugan, put down a card, and ran away like it was an active grenade about to blow. It blew up WITH LIIIIIGHT! The robot became encased in lava. So did Fearripper, only Fearripper was consumed by it and turned back into a marble. What was the use of Robotic Pirate Ultra being encased in lava? Some theorize that it gave Dan something to make fun of Rodney for.
"Ha ha! Fatality!"
"It doesn't WORK WHEN YOU SAY IT!!!" He sent out the Generic Reaper!
Dan gasped. "The reaper!"
"YOU," Generic Reaper boomed, "the boy they call Dan. The one who listens to no one. The one who respects not even his precious marbles. The one who give up anything and everything to win. But in the game of life, you are but a loser. One who only seeks victory will time and time again be met with hardship, torture, dread, and GENERAL UNHAPPINESS. For the only way to be truly happy...is to take things as they come to you, to cross bridges when you get to them. And today our bridges intersect yet again, and we tread the same path." His scythe sparkled. "Unfortunately, only one treads one path."
That Reinforcement's still got Super Robotic Pirate Ultra's G's boosted, and the Pirate Field Card'll boost his power by 150! That means...uhh...what's that mean again? If only I had Drago! HE'D give me a snappy answer at a time like this! ...Snappy and RUDE!! I HATE Drago! Don't you remember ANYTHING, me!? Dan thought. For some reason, he had to throw out his marble again. "Bakugan Stand! Field Card, Open!"
Around the two guys swirled vicious flames. They looked quite...vicious.
Fearripper sighed. He didn't have much to do, so he sat cross-legged, laying his head on his hand. He wiggled his fingers.
"You haven't learned much from the battle with Mask the Money, have you, Daniel? I'll just use Dimension Pour." He poured water on the flames, which were immediately quenched as they had been before.
"I thank you, master, for pouring the elixir of fate on the fires of greed and quenching this boy's thirst for power."
"...You're...welcome, Generic Reaper."
Dan seemed really surprised! "WHA!?"
"SUPER ROBOTIC PIRATE ULTRA POWER LEVEL 360 G'S. GENERIC REAPER POWER LEVEL 370 G'S."
"You fool. Your strategy is predictable and basic, focusing on pure power. But why do I care about this?" He pushed his glasses and commanded, "Start the battle."
Generic Reaper leaped into the air, weapon behind him, saying, "THE SCYTHE OF VICTORY PREVAILS OVER THE PIRATES OF TYRANNY!! RAAAWR!!" Just as the red robot was about to dodge, Generic Reaper flash stepped behind him and slashed, sending Super Robotic Pirate Ultra deep, deep inside of Rodney's deep, deep tummy.
"SUPER ROBOTIC PIRATE ULTRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
FATALITY.
"I won."
Back on Earth, the goalie missed the ball. Why we care about this is unknown.
Storm clouds appeared overhead as Rodney said coldly, "I won't kill you if you realize your sins, your wrongs."
Dan fell to the asphalt, shaking all over. "I think...I-I think.....I understand."
Rodney's eyes widened. "Really?"
Tears welled up in Dan's eyes and streamed down his face as he shook. "That card you used...was a Counter Field Card!"
"That's not-"
"You used it because...BECAUSE YOU KNEW WHAT I WOULD DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" He screamed at the sky as lightning flashed, rain now soaking his clothes. "NOOOOO! NO, NO, !! !!!"
Leg Armstrong looked around, as confused as the other kids were. "Soooo I take it he DIDN'T win that battle."
"Good job defeating that...that..." Momochi burst into tears before she could say the word.
"It was nothing. He was a fool, and he played ME for a fool." Rodney walked away smiling.
"OOH, a double fooly fooly!" Spencer cried. He had unruly curly brown hair and thin, brown eyes, not to mention a cool red headband.
Dan sobbed, "I couldn't...I couldn't do...I...I...couldn't do anything to...couldn't...couldn't do anything to...COULDN'T DO ANYTHING TO HELP THEM!!"
"He looks crazy," Leg stated.
"Yeah," Stupid-Looking Stan agreed.
They looked at each other. "...Let's run for it!" Leg ordered, and they all ran away.
"I lost Sugarnoid...I lost Super Robotic Pirate Ultra...NO!!" He pounded his fist against the concrete. "NO NO NO!!" He sounded like an argumentative toddler now.
" OOO-O-o-o....."
Stay tuned for more Bakugan Battle Brawlers! SHING!
The Bakugan Battle Brawlers are back! SHING! Battle on!
Dan walked down the rainy road, thinking about the battle. "Man, I'm such a jerk. I shouldn't have gotten angry at Drago, even if it was for bonus points. I shouldn't even have been angry at my computer, or even Mega Man X7, or Flame Hyenard. Or...maybe I SHOULD have been angry at Hyenard for being so annoying. Or maybe - wait, now I'm confused! I'm angry at MYSELF now! Wait, what am I saying?
"I thought I could just win with brute force..." He thought back to his battle with Ricky Boy.
"WHAT!?!?" Drago screamed. "NNNOOOOOOOOO....." He started glowing and releasing power. This time the power wasn't enough, and Drago self-destructed.
"What if that had happened!? Well, for starters Drago would have been happy and not in a lake...and a bunch of crap could have been avoided...now I'm even MORE confused! What's right and what's wrong!?
"Let's play a game, Dan."
"Uh, okay. What;s it called?"
"It's called, uhh...Dan Da Man."
"I like this game already!"
"All you have to do is throw me into the lake over there. That's ALL YOU HAVE TO DO."
"Is that how I win? 'Cause I LOVE winning!"
"To win, you have to throw me in a lake. Bonus points if you act like you hate me!"
"And I just went with it! I let myself win! And I bet Drago's drowning right now, and being eaten or something, just because of me winning! I just cared about my own victory! I wasn't looking out for Drago's life! I didn't even care about Drago!"
"Ooh! BONUS points! I HATE YOU!!" He threw Drago in the lake. "IT'S OVER!!!!! Do I win yet?"
He gasped. "Drago!!" He stumbled onto the bridge, hopefully not about to do what you think he's doing.
Underwater...
Drago sat on an undersea rock and talked to himself. "What life is better? Is life undersea really my best option? Could it be the only option? It's so...so boring. Maybe life with Dan was tolerable. Even if he calls me Drago. Even if he likes eating ****. Maybe I just have to take things like they are. Maybe life was better with him. Of course life was better in Vestroia than any of this, but...
"What a KILLER MOVE! Let's celebrate!"
"He didn't know...he just didn't know..." Drago began to sob.
Yes, Dan was doing what you think he's doing. He leaped off the bridge shouting, "DRAGOOOOOO!!" His ankle hit the railing, and he flopped into the water. Idiotically he yelled "Drago! Drago!" as he waded through the murky waters in search of his lost marble.
"I've been a bit harsh on Dan...he's a growing boy..."
"DRAGO!! DRAGO!!"
".....I'm sorry for everything, Dan, wherever you are, playing your...marble games..."
"DRAGO!! DRAGO!!! DRA - WAAH!" He tripped on a rock, sending a massive underwater shock wave out to everything in a five-meter radius.
Drago heard Dan. "Daniel!"
Dan heard Drago. "DRAGO!!" He ran toward the sound!
His feet kicked so hard, they swept Drago away on a swift current! "YOU *******, DON'T -- I MEAN, STOP RUNNING, YOU -- YOU DAN!"
"NO! DRAGO, COME BACK!! DRAGO!!" He jumped high into the air, scooping up Drago in the nick of time. "DRAGO...Drago...Drago.....hi."
Drago quickly opened and cried, "Dan, it's really you! I have to say I'm happy to see you again! Ah, I'll never call you ******* again, I just don't have the heart! Oh, Dan, you have no idea..."
The rain immediately stopped, and the clouds immediately cleared. It was what the townspeople called "emotion-weather control," or the EWC system. Now they sat together on the hill overlooking Bridge Lake.
"Drago...I'm sorry about everything. I shouldn't have won that time."
"And I shouldn't have told you how to win..."
"I thought I was your friend, but really I wasn't looking out for you at all. I took you to school when you wanted to stay with the Keronians...I brushed the orange juice stain off of you...I made you drink the orange juice...I did so many other ignorant things! I-I-I-I just don't know how to make it up to you! If there's anything, ANYTHING I can do to make it up to you...just say it right now. Anything."
"Okay...I want you to call me Endymio."
"You got it, Drago!"
"...Wait, you just called me Drago."
"I know, that's what you...told me to call you."
"I TOLD YOU ENDYMIO, MOTHER --" He sighed and calmed down. "Time, Endymio. It all takes time."
"...There's something else I wanted to tell you." He looked towards the romantic sunset, the sky turned beautiful shades of red and yellow.
"What is it, Dan?" Drago slowly turned to him, and looked into his milky brown eyes.
"I wanted to tell you..."
"Yeah?"
"I-I-I-I-I-I l-l-l-l-l-l-love.....playing Bakugan."
"Oh." He backed off, realizing he'd been leaning on Dan's pant leg.
"And I kinda thought that we could-"
"Be partners. For however long it takes."
"Huh?"
"You're not the brightest, that I know, but...I need you. We need each other. I know I've been mean to you in the past, getting you in trouble. I'm sorry about all that."
"You...really mean that?"
"Of course!" Drago looked to the sunset, looking lost in the dazzling sunlight. "We're both after the same thing. And if we have the same goals, the same ideals...we must be a perfect team." Drago turned to Dan and said:
"...will you battle with me?"
Dan just looked at Drago for a second. He hadn't expected this to happen. He hadn't known this day would come. To take everything that happened before this day and put it behind them...Drago wasn't at all like the others.
It was an offer he couldn't refuse.
"Of course! How could I not!?" Dan laughed with joy and relief, and Drago almost seemed to grin.
"From now on, as long as we can...we'll be a proper team!" Drago leaped into Dan's arms. In the shining sunset they looked more beautiful than ever. It was the perfect moment for the two of them.
Back in Your Town...
"Bleebluhblahblahbleebluhbloo..." The Kid Squad was walking down the street, talking about stuff.
"Hey, Rodney," Leg asked, "did'ja redo what you did Friday at school?"
"Nah." Rodney pushed his glasses further onto his nose. "I don't like Super Monkey Ball 4 Extreme Jr. Deluxe Adventure Touch & Roll Banana Blitz Inferno The Next Generation as much as I like..." He whispered, "MadWorld."
Everybody gasped. "But that's an M-rated game!" Stan cried, astonished by his answer.
"Hold on, Rodney!" Dan skidded onto the scene!
"How'd you get here?" Stupid-Looking An(ne) asked, baffled- and stupid-looking.
"That's something you'll never find out, Anne!"
An gasped into her hands. He really meant business now!
"Rodney, Mask the Money is evil! Haven't you been on the Internet lately!?"
"Of course I have, but everyone else is a fool. Just think about it. NOBODY questioned or even investigated the cards falling from the sky. Everyone's intimidated by a guy who plays marbles well. You invented this game, yet you've been beaten multiple times and clueless about certain cards! How pitiful this world is, and how wonderful it can become..."
"Hey! Don't call me beaten."
Generic Reaper's voice echoed in Rodney's head. Dan is the one who is throwing life out of its delicate balance. He is the greedy hot-blooded fool who uses these Bakugan for his own victory, his own selfish goals. And if we allow him to become the master of the game, this game feared by all on this Earth, all of God's creatures will be at his beck and call. You may be the only sane man left.
"Go away, classmates! This is personal." Rodney shooed his chums away. "My Reaper speaks to me, and he tells me what must be true, for I look through a blue-tinted lens! I see the world in a different light, Dan, and you will never understand! Never...unless you try them on." He slowly revealed a pair of glasses from his pocket.
An extra pair!
"I thought I would spare you once, just once, but this time I will not let you go."
"Ha! I've got protection!" He grunted as he tried to pull down his shades (or were they goggles in disguise? Hmm). They wouldn't come down! "Dangit! Fused with my skull."
No! the Generic Reaper cried. Subdue him in Sub-Terra. Maybe he will see the world your way, even without the blue-tinted glasses.
"...My Reaper, he tells me to defeat you again in Bakugan. That might bring you to your senses."
"You're on! Bakugan Field, Open!" Stupid things stopped moving to showcase the AWESOMENESS of the time-stopping AGAIN. They set their cards, Rodney sent out Fearripper, and Dan used Drago -- wait, WHAT THE!? Even though he said Super Robotic Pirate Ultra was his last Bakugan before he got Drago from Bridge Lake, he still has another Bakugan besides Drago that he can use!?
"Use caution!" Drago warned.
"I hear ya all too well, Drago. He's obviously got a trap set up, but I've got a trick up my OWN sleeve."
"Really, now?"
He will never learn his lesson! He will never learn the way! Such is the fate of the one who sees through no blue-tinted lens!
Rodney threw out his second Giant Black Mantis, and with it came the Marionette ability. Purple stringy things latched onto the opposing Rhino Blaze Demon. This time the strings merely swung the big-winged Rhinozoid over to another Gate Card, where Fearripper was ready to do battle.
"Alright!" Fearripper was ecstatic! "Now I get to do something!" The Field Card below them activated, sending dark ripples through the murky and uncertain waters of life, as Generic Reaper would put it.
"FEARRIPPER POWER LEVEL INCREASED TO 400 G'S."
"Oh no you di-in't...Ability Card, Activate! McAfee Firewall! Fire surrounded Rhino Demon.
"FEARRIPPER'S POWER LEVEL DECREASED TO 350 G'S. RHINO DEMON POWER LEVEL STILL LOWER THAN FEARRIPPER'S AT 320 G'S."
"That's not good enough." Rodney opened his mouth wide, preparing for Fearripper's fatal blow. Fearripper clawed not at Rhino Demon, but at Rhino Demon's soul. He ripped the fear out of him, and Rhino Demon politely swooped down into Rodney's mouth.
FATALITY.
"Dan! Be more careful and mindful of your actions!" Drago warned.
"I'm being mindful, okay!?"
"Bonus points don't matter in the whole scheme of things, Dan! Get ahold of yourself!"
"You've got a point there, buddy. Bakugan, Stand!" He'd sent out...Drago!
"Just please...call me Endymio."
"Understood, Drago!"
I don't think I should try that again for a while... Drago sighed out a tiny flame.
Not pausing between sentences, the Bakugantlet declared, "GIANT BLACK MANTIS POWER LEVEL 290 G'S DRAGO POWER LEVEL 340 G'S."
"Oh, so THERE'S your Drago. Maybe he sees things my way, for maybe he looks through the blue-tinted lens. Tell me, Drago, would you like to see Dan killed off? Or wiped from existence?"
"Hmm...tough question, but no."
"Huh. Explain."
"Dan's an idiot, I know. But you don't kill an autistic kid because he's autistic, do you?"
"...YES!!" Rodney's voice deepened again. His pupils turned to slits, his face turned pale, and his eyes...they became the blue-tinted lens! He had no need for the glasses anymore; their vision, their view of the world...had become his. The glasses shattered in an instant, for they knew they had no further purpose in this world...
"You've become a complete monster!!" Dan pointed out.
"It is not me who is the monster, but this world! It's all an illusion, isn't it? All a figment of someone's imagination? An imaginary world which transcends its own rules and its own laws, its own reality. But it's NOT REALITY!! And I know! I am the only sane man on this whole insane planet! I am the only sane man in this whole insane UNIVERSE!! Everybody takes me for a fool, that they do, but they are the fools themselves, aren't they!?"
"No! You're just crazy!" Dan shouted, shaking his head ferociously.
"How are YOU so sure YOU'RE not crazy!?"
"Well, how are YOU so sure YOU'RE not?"
"SHOUTING IS NOT THE SIGN of an INSANE MAN!! HOW WOULD YOU KNOW IF YOU'RE SO INSANE, DANIEL!? HOW!?!?"
Drago said, "You haven't considered the possibility that-"
"NO! I AM NOT THE CRAZY ONE, you CRAZY, CRAZY FOOLS!!"FOR I SEE THROUGH THE BLUE-TINTED LENS!!
AND FOREVER I WILL STAY
THE ONLY SANE MAN
WITH THE ONLY SANE WAY!
I SEE THROUGH BLUE-TINTED LENS!!
IT IS NOT ONE OF SORROW
IT IS ONE OF THINGS TO COME
AND WHAT WILL BE TOMORROW!!
I see through blue-tinted lens
O 'tis one full of dread
But maybe if I stay this way
This will all be in my headTHE ONLY SANE MAN!!
And I will be proud of how I saw through
The blue-tinted lens!
I see through the blue-tinted lens
O 'tis one full of dread
But maybe if I stay this way
One day I'll wake in bed
This will all be in my head
And I will have been the only sane man...
Drago sniffled, actually feeling sorry for Rodney now. But I can't just let him win. Who knows what he'd do next? Who knows what Mask the Money would do with him?
That was beautiful...
"...And now I must finish the battle I have declared." Rodney was suddenly calm again, though his voice was still deep. "Fearripper will battle you."
"FEARRIPPER POWER LEVEL 400 G'S."
"I hope you've got backup, Dan!" Drago yelled. "I can't really predict things like this, y'know!"
"Don't worry, Drago! Gate Card, Open! Intersect!" The Field Card started glowing!
No! NO! I didn't prepare for this move! Now he's confident! Now I'll never be able to give him the glasses... Rodney clenched his fists.
A wiggly multicolored jail cell formed around Fearripper. "That ougtha keep you from brawling!" Dan cheerily said.
"What's your strategy, Dan? Waiting on the right card, or something?"
"Just watch! Bakugan, Stand!" Giant Red Mantis appeared in front of Giant Black Mantis! Apparently he forgot about TWO marbles the first time he battled Rodney. "Your turn to battle! And since he's a palette swap, he comes power-packed with the same exact Ability Card! Marionette!"
"NOOOOOOOOOM!" Red energy strings came out of the scythe-things and surrounded Fearripper! "Go to the same Field Card as that other mantis!" The strings moved Fearripper to the card stated.
"No! You can't treat me like your rag doll! Because I'm highly-"
BLOOOOOOOOOOSSSHHHHHHHHHH!
"What was THAT!?" Drago flew out of a giant smoke cloud and turned back into a marble, or something. We're not sure.
"I researched stuff on DA NET."
Drago gapsed. "DA NET? You seriously call it DA NET!?"
"Of course! Using my net-surfin' Blackberry I found some interesting info on Bakugan tactics!"
"Have you been using any of said tactics?"
"...No, not really, but I found out something about Mine Goats. Anyways, I figured it had something to do with this, and I took my chances."
"OHH. So the way I see it is that he was going to use Mantis as a sacrifice, but you triggered the card somehow so you could use the Mine Goats! Or something? Is that right?"
"Uhh...yeah."
"You're an idiot savant, Dan."
"Thanks. What's that?"
"I'll tell ya later."
"Okay. AAANYWAYS, I personally think Bakugan is way more strategic than Yu-Gi-Oh. It lets you stop attacks, plan ahead of time, set cards in advance..."
"Uhh, I think both games have that."
"Oh." Dan looked around. "Well!"
I can hardly believe it! So many loopholes even I can't quite understand! I may not be crazy but...I think I'm going...I might be going...a little mad... Rodney went on with the game. "Go, my Reaper!"
"I smite you with the scythe of RIGHTEOUSNESS!!" Generic Reaper growled upon being stood, or whatever the term is. He pushed Giant Red Mantis into Rodney's mouth. By the looks of it, Rodney was either enjoying the taste or indeed mad.
FATALITY.
"Well! That leaves us with one Bakugan each, doesn't it, Rodney?"
"OF COURSE IT DOES, DON'T TELL ME WHAT I ALREADY KNOW!!"
"He's really irritable, Dan, and crazy. Don't try talking to him too much!"
"Alright, Drago, what would his next card be..." Dan snapped his fingers. "Dimension Pour!"
"Either that's deductive reasoning or lucky guess. Lucky guess?"
"Meh. Kinda sorta both. Mask the Money only used two or three cards, and those were Dimension Pour and Bubble Dimension, plus the Doom card, of course."
"So as long as you don't use an Ability or Field Card, you'll win, is basically what you're saying."
"No, just as long as I don't use a Field Card. My deductive guessing is always right!"
He'll learn someday...
"Gate Card, Set! Bakugan Stand!" Drago and the Generic Reaper went head-to-head.
"This time, I shall take down the dragon which guards the cavern of sorrow, and within it the golden boy of greed," he moaned.
"I'll show you golden! Gate Card, Open!" Some fire surrounded the two Bakugan again.
"At this point it's either brilliance, or lucky guessing..." Rodney grinned, baring his sharp fangs. How'd they get like that? "I'll win this one, I know it! BECAUSE YOU'RE ALL FOOLS, THAT YOU ARE!! I'll use Dimension Pour!" He poured some liquid onto the flames...but nothing happened.
"You've destroyed THAT card, but not my Character Card!"
"CHARACTER CARD!? YOU SET THAT!? SUCH A THING EXISTS!?!?"
"Well, yeah. I DID help write the rules to this thing..."
Rodney stared at the flames in disbelief. Suddenly, the fire grew! "NO!! I POURED OIL ONTO THE FLAMES!! OIL!! HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN!?!?"
Drago make an angry rhinoceros sound as fire spiraled around him, eyes glowing a fearsome green.
Green...tinted...lens... Rodney backed away.
"DRAGO'S POWER LEVEL DOUBLED TO 680 G'S."
"This cannot be...! The victor cannot be the enemy, for no one else is capable of slaying this dragon...unless there is a prophecy, and unless the light shines through the tunnel of-"
"I CAN NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ALL OF THOSE BAKUGAN!!!" Flames emanated from Drago's pores. He released his power, and...
GAME OVER YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Rodney lost the game.
They were back on Earth. Stupid stuff started moving again. Now Rodney was the one who fell to the ground. "Now.....now I'll never get the chance...never another chance..."
"Hm!" Dan rubbed his nose. "Guess my nose's runny."
"So you won against Rodney, obviously," Spencer said, stepping forward.
"Yeah." Leg joined in.
I lost...LOST.....lost...and now he's too enthusiastic! He doesn't realize if you stay pessimistic, then someday you'll have no worries...or.....maybe........
"Don't take it too harsh, dood." Dan's iPod pumped out a radical rock song as he bent down and put his hand on Rodney's shoulder. "I had a heckuva time battling you, so...maybe we could battle again sometime!"
"NO!! Never! Never again! It would only bring...bring bad.....memories to mind..."
"Just drop all the seriousness next time, okay? Nothing serious about a good game of marbles!"
Nothing serious about a good game of marbles...nothing serious about it...nothing serious...nothing.....
.....
His eyes broke into several white shards with a large CRACK!
"Rodney!" Dan instinctively hugged the no-eyed boy, about to cry again.
Then...Rodney's eyes regenerated. They were no longer blue; now they were as brown as ever.
"RODNEY!!" Dan hugged Rodney tightly, and Rodney couldn't help but hug back.
"Dan, I'm sorry! It's not a foolish planet! Autistic people deserve a chance at life! I like Super Monkey Ball more than MadWorld! This world is real! Mask the Money is a cruel and heartless man! I'm not that genre savvy! I don't want to see life through a blue-tinted lens!" Tears streamed down Dan's shoulder.
"Aw, cheer up, Rod. Maybe another battle'll cheer ya up."
"Another...no! I just need time alone!" He put on a clear pair of glasses and ran away.
And so ends the tale
of the boy called Rodney
who saw through the blue-tinted lens...
But it was not the end of Mask the Money's tale...
Back at Dan's house...
"I'm tellin' ya, Drago was DA BEST!"
"SHUT UP ABOUT DRAGO BEING DA BEST!!" his chatroom buddies yelled.
"But I'm serious!"
"You can very well be serious and only mention something once," Marucho muttered.
"But thanks to him, I'm ranked 109th! Wait, that's worse than my rank before...but still, he's DA DRAGONOID, YO!!" He started kissing his marble.
"HEY!!" Drago opened in his palm. "I might have forgiven you, and we may be battle partners, but you're still stupid, and you're still obsessive. So please, please...stop it."
"You got it, Drago!" The marble sniffed.
"Who's mah best buddeh? YEU ARE!!"
"Dan, I said - please, just - Daniel! Please, just - I have a rash! How does a marble even GET a rash? HEY!! DANIEL!! YOU HAVE PEACH FUZZ!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! DAMN YOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUU!!!"
Next time on Bakugan!
Uhh...stuff happens! *wipes nose* Seeya there!
We leave our audience today with...the Bakugan dance.
Dooby da doo DEE dooby da doo DEE, dooby dooby doob DEE dooby dooby doob DEE, dooby da dooby doo dee!