"Commander! Something happened to the Inquisitor! We must go now!"
His heart nearly stopped. Cullen apologized to the Grey Warden he was talking to. They had agreed to support the Inquisition, as most were being controlled by the Venatori. He tried not to look desperate as he ascended the stairs to the top of the battlements, but he could not help himself. If something had happened…
He could hear her sobs as soon as he reached the top.
"Out of my way!" He shouted, parting the sea of soldiers.
A force field of glowing white surrounded a weeping Nethra. Dorian reached out to touch it, but flinched away in pain.
Iron Bull attempted to cut it down with his broadaxe, but to no avail.
"What happened here?" Cullen almost whispered.
"They fell straight out'a the Fade, Ser. I saw it with me own two eyes." A soldier said from beside him.
Cullen peered around. "Where's Hawke?"
"She stayed behind so we could escape." Solas spoke. For the first time, it wasn't something condescending.
"Out of breath, the monster is coming. My staff has been knocked away. I love you Fenris. I love you." Cole whispered from behind the Commander.
"Maker's breath. Nethra…" The elf was still sobbing, oblivious to the crowd she'd drawn to herself. He slowly walked up to the light. "Nethra," He spoke through the magic wall "we won. The Grey Wardens have sided with the Inquisition. All thanks to you." He kneeled down. "Minimal casualties."
Her eyes peeked open, staring at him. "Hawke's dead, Cullen."
"You don't know that."
"Hawke's dead!" She screamed, sobs racked her body. "Alone in The Fade." A pulse of magic knocked the crowd back a few feet. He reached to her, but the forcefield stung his fingertips. He gritted his teeth as he shoved his whole hand through.
"Andraste's tits." Dorian had to look away. Cullen's glove melted off, revealing blistering flesh, burning from magic. He tried his best not to scream.
He reached further until he finally touched her shoulder. The magic disintegrated.
It was silent with the exception of Nethra's soft cries. Cullen picked her up slowly, her swollen face burying into his armour. "Retreat back to the main camp. We will discuss provisions and plans with the Grey Wardens later."
He carried her in silence. His coat was soaked from her tears, but he would rather tears than blood. Her leg was still impaled by an arrow, but she wasn't bleeding out enough for it to be a huge threat. They would take it out when they got back to camp.
Her companions trudged behind her. Cullen wondered where Varric was, and if he had heard the news yet. He peered down at the brunette elf. Her eyes held a blank stare. She could have been dead if not for the death grip on his arm. Mother Giselle was waiting for them in the medic tent when they got back to camp.
"Déjà vu, don't you think?" She said as he placed Nethra on the bed.
"I suppose so." Cullen mumbled, sitting back in a wooden chair.
Mother Giselle quickly fed Nethra a sleeping potion to knock her out for the arrow removal. Her eyes slowly closed before small snores escaped her mouth.
"Something concerns you, Commander." The Chantry mother said as she patted an ointment around the wound.
"I told her I wouldn't let anyone she loved die. I broke a promise."
"Death is always a result of war. It is naïve to say important lives won't be lost."
"I should have…"
"Regretting the past does nothing, Commander."
He sighed, leaning forward and clasping his hands together. "It feels like it's the only thing I do."
Nethra woke up to Cullen's snores. A fire from outside was casting shadows across the camp. Echoes of laughing soldiers bounced around the town of tents.
"Inky!" Sera walked up to the bed, holding two mugs of red liquid. "Sorry 'bout the arrow in the leg. But you were acting crazy!" She passed one of the mugs to Nethra.
"It's alright." Nethra sipped the spiced wine. "I hope I can apologize to Bull for hitting him in the…you know."
Sera cackled, causing Cullen to stir. "That pisshat is exercising his knob right now. He'll be fine!"
"I did not need to hear that." Cullen grumbled, stretching from his nap.
"Sleeping beauty's awake! I'll leave you to it." Sera pranced off to go talk to Scout Harding.
"Is it just me, or does Sera become easier to understand when she's drunk?" Nethra joked. "Cullen, what happened to your hand?" She practically jumped out of her bed, ignoring the sharp pain in her leg.
"It's from…do you not remember?" He spoke quietly as she cradled his burnt and blistered arm.
"What do you mean? Was I there?"
"After you came out of the rift…do you remember anything?"
"All I remember is trying to get to Hawke, then the rift to the Fade closing." She limped over to the medical supply drawer. Her eyes stung when she mentioned Hawke.
"Some sort of magic ward was protecting you. I-"
"He shoved his hand in like a lunatic. After watching Tiny try to cut it down."
"Varric." Nethra dropped the supplies, leaning onto the bed for support. "I-Hawke…I'm so sor-"
"No need to apologize, Jailbird. Tiny told me everything."
"She said to tell you 'goodbye'."
"Hey," The dwarf touched her arm, staring straight up at her. "Thanks for…trying to reason with her. It's not an easy thing to do." He looked to the ground, eyes glistening.
"I'm so sorry, Varric." She whimpered, tears streaming down her face. She sat back down on her bed.
"Hey, come on. No one wants to see the Inquisitor crying after winning a battle." He gave her a pat on the back. "You should get some rest. You've had a rough day."
Varric returned to the campfire. Cullen stood up slowly.
"Mother Giselle said to put you in a tent tonight. I suppose they're planning on packing up early tomorrow. This way you can sleep in."
"Alright." She said quietly.
"Do you need help getting over there?"
Nethra slid to the edge of the bed. "I don't think so-" She collapsed as soon as her injured leg touched the ground. It was worse than she thought.
"Maker's breath!" Cullen ran to her side, holding her up. "Don't strain yourself." He swept an arm under her legs to pick her up.
They could still hear the people chatting by the fire in their tent. Cullen gently laid her small body down onto the furs. He unbuckled the sweaty leather chestpiece she wore and set it to the side. He pulled off her boots, trying his best not to irritate the arrow wound. He pulled the furs out from under her, throwing them on top of her body. She was silent the entire time. He knew it was never a good thing when Nethra was silent.
He stared at her. The light from the fire outside gave her skin an ethereal glow. He could still make out her freckles in the limited lighting. She had her lips pursed and her eyebrows were furrowed as she stared forward, avoiding eye contact.
"Nethra, what's wrong?"
She whispered something incoherent. Cullen pressed a hand on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry?"
"You promised." She spoke loud enough for him to hear this time. He froze. His lips were parted as he attempted to come up with something – anything – to say.
"Nethra-"
"You promised! 'I won't let anyone you love die,' That's what you said!" The chatter at the firepit was achingly silent. "Hawke's dead! You said-"
He pulled her into his chest, refusing to let her see his glossy eyes. "I know."
"You promised." She sobbed.
"I'm sorry."
Sobs for eternityyyyyy. Thank you so much to InuGuardian1984 and Syraena for the sweet reviews! See you next time! Don't forget to fav/follow/review if you like the story! It means a lot :)