This have taken so long, it's ridiculous. I've been on it most days but wanted it to be right for you, thank you so much for the reviews, so close to 100!
I obviously don't own the Thunderbirds, though it amuses me to think of Scott's reaction if I did!
Poem further on is by HanyouInny (DA), any questions please PM or review and I'll get back to you asap.

Gordon and John had been sat in the kitchen staring at the phone for the last few hours, the sun had long since disappeared beneath the horizon and the silence had stretched beyond comfortable. How could a silence be comfortable when the fate of a beloved brother hung in the balance? Now and again Gordon would sigh theatrically and roll his eyes, throwing his head back as he tried to hold it together, desperately trying to keep his emotions in check and not flip off the handle at John for just sitting there seemingly so calm. He wanted to do something, he wanted to be there helping, most of all he wanted to hear Alan's voice telling him everything would be ok.

Twice the phone had rang since Scott had delivered the sickening news, the first time being their father to explain what they were going to do and what he wanted Gordon and John to be doing, and the second with a rather morose Lady P to make sure they were both alright. She was already on the mainland with Parker, racing to Jeff's side to give him her support. This had irked Gordon immensely yet he knew his father would need her and that the help she could offer the police with her secret service and government contacts would quite possibly be vital.

Despite his calm appearance, John was just as worried as Gordon, but his mind had been working through the larger picture and he'd concerned himself with how well their father would be handling the situation. Having to hand things over to the police must have been difficult and somewhat infuriating, losing the control he'd always had such a tight reign over, especially when it came to family.

John stared over to the wall where the white cordless phone hung silently, it seemed bizarre how such a small thing could hold so much hope, or if things went wrong, despair. Being grounded on the island meant that the fate of their youngest brother seemingly rested on that one small white phone as they waited for it's shrill tone to penetrate the desperate silence.

He knew Gordon wanted to disobey their father and take Tracy Two to the mainland and help in the operation the police were setting out, part of him was tempted to give in and join him yet at the same time he knew his father's reasoning and he understood it. If the Thunderbirds were needed to save Alan then the Thunderbirds needed to be operational, be it with a skeleton staff and Brain's orbiting the planet on Five, they needed to be there as long as it were a possibility.

He sighed for the umpteenth time that hour and ran a hair through his disheveled hair, it stuck up in funny angles through the repetitive motion but he didn't care. All that mattered now was hearing that Alan was safe and well and that they could bring him home.

I Have No One

I have a heart,
but no one to give it to.

I have a soul,

but no one to share it with.

I have a mind,
but no one to hear its thoughts.

I have a body,
but no one to hold it close.

I have fantasies,
but no one to make them come true.

I have doubts,
but no one to tell me to believe.

I have anxiety,

but no one to save me from fear.

I have despair,

but no one to make me hope.

I have no one,

isn't there someone out there to give me to?

Taio had never been afraid of dying, he had never really let the thought of it pass through his mind, not since the death of his wife. All other life just kept going, there was always work to be done and money to be made, the world never stopped.

No. He was unafraid of his own death, his mind had spent so long consumed with such overwhelming loss that anything else felt insignificant and worthless to him. No one compared to her kindness, her honesty, and what he only ever saw as perfection. Brown eyes welcoming him into the day followed by that radiant smile that warmed his soul.

At the time he knew he was lucky to have found her, lucky that she had blessed him with her own love and that they were going to share in that love by having a child. Nine months of preparation, nine months of sheer joy and bewilderment at every new piece of information about the baby and what was to be expected. Nine months leading up to a midnight dash into a quiet hospital ward, nerves taking hold and sending knots of worry and hope through the pit of his stomach.

But then there she was, his beautiful baby girl. His baby. Their baby. Her fingers and tiny toes so perfect and so, so beautiful. Her eyes blinking owlishly out into the new world before her. That was the happiest he had ever seen his wife and in turn it had filled him with such joy and such devotion, such hope for the future that seemed to lay forever at their feet.

But life was cruel. The world was cruel. People were cruel. The centre of his universe had been shot dead by a stray bullet in a botched robbery attempt in a jewelry store, in a moment she had been taken from him and all that love and compassion they had shared was suddenly left hanging in the empty air.

Losing someone in such a cruel unforgiving way tainted that perfect memory, when he looked back he could easily recall the pain of returning home to a crying baby without a mother. Listening to the well wishes of mourners that he couldn't bring himself to believe in, they'd never understand the true meaning of pain. Every time there was a knock at the door or the phone rang he felt so certain to have dreamt the events, that she'd be there holding him and telling him how everything was ok and it was all some horrible nightmare, that he wasn't alone.

He'd distanced himself, money allowed him to avoid home life and to throw himself into work all too easily. He paid a nanny, he hired a housekeeper and bought apartments closer to his various working locations. His home life began to come in the form of letters and emails, photos sent of a young child growing up so quickly. It wasn't that he didn't love the child, or that he didn't want to be a father. Every time he looked at those photos and when he rarely went to visit her all her could see were the brilliant brown eyes of a lost wife and a wide smile that shone out a thousand hopes that fell down defeated in his heart. Every time he saw the child the jagged pieces of his heart felt as though they'd dug even deeper into his chest, tearing open new wounds he didn't want to remember. No, it wasn't that he didn't love her, it was that he felt as though he didn't deserve to.

He wanted so much for Tess, his baby girl. He wanted her to grow up in Italy where she knew her heritage and could find a love for the country he so desperately missed yet couldn't bring himself to go back to. She needed the language to flow through her veins, the warm summers shining down on her and for the joy of life. America felt so cold to Taio after what had happened, the love he'd once held for it had slipped into a darkness of hate and despair. The only ties that remained were that of his wife's life there and the businesses he had used to build walls around himself.

Taio knew what he'd done was wrong yet there was no one to stop him anymore, no one to rein him in, smile, and tell him everything would be alright. Nothing was ever going to be alright. Sending Tess away should have kept her safe yet her life was dull and she'd missed out on the opportunities he'd thrown her way, forever obsessed with finding her way back to her father and trying to make him show her some ounce of emotion, some ounce of regret that she could never possibly understand.

She'd grown into her own person, so free spirited and alive, so much like her mother yet at the same time so, so different. He felt like he didn't know her, he didn't deserve to be in her life and that she didn't know what she wanted, she didn't understand. So he'd pushed her away, watching from the sidelines as she hung around desperately trying to get in contact and to arrange meetings to see him.

Of course the timing of everything had been horrendous, when it seemed as though she'd finally given up on him and would go to Europe Taio had to get mixed up with his overwhelming obsession with Jeff Tracy. A man who throughout all hardships had faced life head on and made so many successes. A man who had done the opposite to Taio, given his family all the love his heart could give and been there for them every step of the way, seemingly leaving the death of his wife behind, erasing the memories and starting a new.

He shouldn't have dragged Tess into it, he knew that now. But he didn't want her here, he didn't like seeing her walking down the same street in which her own mother had died. His heart was in his throat ever time they met and the only way he felt able to make her leave was to make her hate him, make her leave for her own life wherein he was no longer a part. This was not a life he wanted her to be part of.

Looking back he could see how awfully wrong he'd made things, how each decision in turn had all led up to this one point of agonizing realization. How by trying to save himself from the pain he had in turn caused more pain than he could have ever realized.

Alan was scared, cold, aching, and wishing the weather outside the window would stop the low growls of the threatening storm. He didn't cope well with thunderstorms, it was an irrational fear but the thunder and lightning terrified him beyond all reckoning, without his father's and brother's comfort he was sure his heart would tear from his chest through fear.

He tried to distract his overactive mind and to visualize what he had been looking forward to doing over the holidays; seeing his brothers all together instead of on the single visits they made to him at school. Being on the sunny island and following potential rescue missions from command and control, learning as much as he possible about the job he so longed to one day fill, having John down on rotation from Five…

He desperately tried to see the happiness the envisage how the summer was meant to be, but try as he might he couldn't shake the images and thoughts of the last few hours, they filled his mind like a nervous itch he couldn't help but scratch away at until the memories flooded in. He'd shake them out but they just repeated, again and again he tried to figure out where everything had gone wrong, but he couldn't begin to process how things had gotten to where he was now, left alone in a dark unfamiliar office handcuffed to a chair. It was a far cry from his island paradise.

The car that had brought him there had finished its journey in an underground car park disturbingly similar to the one it had set off from, the same flickering lights and a singular vehicle parked alone despite the time of day. There were differences such as the pallets of gas canisters lined along one of the walls, empty pallets stood stacked by the side of them and mounds of cardboard boxes besides that. They looked used and abandoned as though someone was avoiding thinking of a use, unnecessary mess that you wouldn't find in any Tracy buildings.

Two of the car's occupants had exited the vehicle with Alan in tow, removing the bag from his head they had led the hobbling teen silently to the elevator and up into the building itself. The building differed most strikingly to that of Tracy Towers in it's age; the blocky structure seemed designed to fit most purposes yet felt dark and cold, even without the given situation it would not be considered welcoming.

After what seemed like minutes the lift had finally come to a shuddered stop and they'd walked out into a dark, wide hallway, the patterned carpet clashing violently with the cigarette stained garish wallpaper on the walls. Nondescript doors lined the way, shut against them as though closed until office hours or until somebody found a key. There had been a smell in the air, dry and harsh, scratching at the back of Alan's throat like sandpaper, he'd wanted to cough but daren't cut the silent atmosphere with the noise.

He'd been led past the rooms until they reached one at the end, the door looking down the length of the corridor as though watching them and waiting. A few leather chairs sat awkwardly by the door, the carpet before them worn with what could only be construed as with that of a pacing motion. Though Alan had felt sure that whoever had paced before the room so ardently had less to be worried about than he did at that moment in time. At least he hoped so, his mind had instantly been filled with one hundred awful scenarios of that of the people who had been there before him.

At the time he'd been surprised that when the men had made their way into the room, they'd found the room empty. They seemed non-fazed by the lack of welcome and had been happy to handcuff him to one of the heavy chairs before the desk and to turn heel and seeming desperately relieved, leave, still muttering about the shit they were going to be in if and most probably when Zucco found out what had happened. To put it simply, Alan's list of worries had mounted.

The uncomfortable car ride had felt an eternity in which time Alan had convinced himself that telling Zucco the truth about what had happened to Tess would be the best course of revenge, especially for the men having snatched him in the first place. Yet now, sat in the darkened room with no sound other than his own quickened breathing and the rain lacing down the windows, he wasn't too sure whether he wanted to be alone with the man at all, let alone voice the words about what had happened. Suddenly he had found himself on the side of his kidnappers, hoping to hell that Taio wouldn't know, that maybe the situation could be resolved before news got through, or maybe he wouldn't turn up at all and the next face he'd see would be that of his father's. Yet he knew all too well that it was an impossible hope.

After a while his hearing adjusted to the silence and he could hear the ticking of a clock behind him, at first it had gone by unnoticed yet as the minutes went by the noise seemed sickening. He turned in the chair to watch the slow motion the second hand seemed to make, yet each time his heart seemed to thud in surprise as it moved, unsure whether being able to see time passing was something he was thankful of or something he wished would just go away. He wanted to envisage the Thunderbirds coming to save him, his brothers and his father a second closer to his rescue, a minute closer to the flight home. On rescue missions every second was important, yet now they seemed in abundance and wasted on the dead air.

Maybe they wouldn't come, maybe they wouldn't know where to look, maybe they wouldn't care. He shook himself. They'd care, he knew that. If they didn't he wouldn't always be at the receiving end of his dads anger on the receipt of his report card, results lower than any his brothers had ever had. If they didn't care then why did they tease him so much? You had know someone to truly upset them, to dig within their souls and pull out the words to say to send cracks throughout the heart.

He shook himself again, trying to think of positives rather than letting his mind play negatives and dig into the parts of his own thought processes that could really loosen those cracks and tear his heart apart, far cleaner and easier than the thunder and lightening outside of the window.

The loved him. They cared. They would come for him. When his father said that you couldn't save everyone, he never meant family. Right?

His breath hitched in his throat as he heard the lift at the end of the hallway ring out as it reached the current floor, he found himself wide eyed staring towards the door as slow footsteps made their way ever closer. Creaking floor boards and a soft squeak of leather soles on the carpeted corridor charting the wearers journey towards Alan.

He knew who it was before the handle fully turned, having never met the man he could only envisage his appearance and the anger that would be portrayed through his every feature. He stood but the heavy chair held his handcuffed wrist in place so he awkwardly sat back down, unsure whether to remain where he was or put the chair between himself and Taio. Not that he could go anywhere.

As the door opened Alan was surprised to see a rather disheveled, tired looking man. A whisky glass and bottle held awkwardly in one hand whilst the other fumbled for the light switch, eyes glancing over to Alan before he turned away and made his way to the desk that stood before the teenager.

The man seemed half lost, blinking owlishly at the rain beating against the window, watching tears of water make their way down the windowpane before dripping out into the night. It seemed an almost hypnotic motion, the street lights below casting hues of blues and yellows into the room, now lit by small old-fashioned lamps lining the walls.

Taio let the bottle of whisky sit before him, turning to it and staring hard at the label before finishing his glass and pouring another, he gaze finally making its way back to Alan.

"Tough night, kid."

Alan had expected a large, strongly build and powerful man, which admittedly Taio was. Yet with such a tired, lost and almost sad demeanor he seemed almost small, a shadow of what he'd imagined, a whisper of the fear in his mind. He was afraid of the man yet suddenly didn't feel quite so helpless, he knew he had a weapon and it would be the one thing that generally got him into the most amount of bother in the first place. Speech. It would be his savior or his downfall, people were always telling him that.

He watched for a minute, eyes wavering between the drink Taio clutched at so desperately and the distant look in his eyes. Confusion and something else Alan couldn't read… loss?

"Is she dead?" He whispered, his hushed tones sounding plenty loud enough through the silence. He thought he already knew the answer, how could the man before him be showing anything but? Yet by how his father had spoken of Taio he had been portrayed as so uncaring, cruel and calculating, not a family man at all. Maybe this was something else.

Taio's looked up slowly and they met eyes, grief meeting fear yet holding their own until Taio finally shook his head for some kind of response, yet the one that followed did not tie with the motion.

"They hit her with the damned car." He hissed the words as though poisonous, hatred seething between his teeth in a spray of saliva, the glass banged down against the wood of the desk and he shook his head again, half awakening from the stupor he'd fallen into. He looked away from the young Tracy and leant down by the desk, shuffling through one of the draws and pulling out a box of cigars. "Why the hell was she even there?"

Alan wasn't sure if the question was directed at him but he felt the guilt anyway, he felt solely accountable that anyone had been there in the first place, clearly it shouldn't have come to that. "Have you seen her?" He asked shakily. Taio's voice had risen yet he still couldn't bring himself to raise his own, he didn't want the anger in the man directed at him yet it was an impending certainty.

"What?" The man took a swig of his whisky straight from the bottle before pouring himself another into the glass, eyeing the half empty bottle with distain before turning to the cigars and running one through his fingers. "No. She got hit by a damned car, why the hell would I want to see that?"

For the second time in as many minutes Alan wanted to put the chair between himself and the man, he was grateful of the desk but feared where this was heading. Before the summer his only true knowledge of fear had been that of most teenagers, fear of bringing that report card home, fear of admitting to an ill deed and probably one of his larger fears, fear of rejection. Later, when he looked back, he'd realize the depth of the emotion.

"She might have survived." He hadn't seen the after effects but the position she'd landed in and the sound her body had made as it hit the windscreen had been enough to convince him of the outcome, he still held onto that hope though. People survived worse, miracles happened, medicine was amazing. "You need to check…" His words faded into nothingness, lost in the silence as Taio surveyed him with a curious gaze, the scrutiny uncomfortable. The man had cut the end of the cigar and was playing with the lighter he'd withdrawn from his jacket pocket, flicking it over and over again so the flame flickered and died in one easy motion. "They must have taken her to a hospital." Alan continued, desperate for the man to make some kind of positive action to stop wherever this could be leading. "She might need you… she will need you."

Taio let out a long breath, finally lighting the cigar and taking a slow drag. "I'm not going through that again, not now."

"You can't just kill her off, you need to know what happened! You obviously care enough to be concerned else you wouldn't be acting like you are now!" His voice rose as his anger and confusion made it's way through, the handcuff on his wrist rattling against the armrest on the chair as he waved his arms exasperatedly.

Taio glared, eventually standing and making his way around the desk on which he perched, leaning over so his face was just inches from Alan's own, an arm reaching back and nails digging into the upholstery by the teens shoulder. "You speak of things you have no idea about, you're a child who has no clue about life and death or how much it hurts to lose someone you love. You know nothing of this, you know nothing other what your prissy island life in the sun, surrounded by endless wealth and what you are told, tells you." He growled, words sharp. "You cannot possibly understand."

Alan opened his mouth to retaliate, scared yet also angry at the man's presumptions, yet his words didn't have the chance to form.

"You think you can compare the loss of your mother to this?" Taio leant back, folding his arms yet still glaring with blue murder down at the blonde. "How old were you when she died? Do you even remember her? No? So how on earth can you ever imagine what it feels like to lose someone in such a way?"

He couldn't answer that, it was the truth and it had hurt him throughout his life. How could he ever relate to the grief his brother's and father had gone through when he understood nothing of it? It was spiteful and selfish yet he was jealous not to be able to share in that grief, not to be able to exchange stories and understand others when they spoke of her. Not to remember her in the slightest.

"I might not have known her but I know how the loss has effected my entire family! Everyday I can see the hole it has left yet I can do nothing about it. I've lost someone I never even knew and I can't even voice my own thoughts and feelings because people like you tell me I have no right." He looked away, the anger was stinging his eyes and the rumble of thunder outside the building had his heart in flutters. "You think it's easy living in the shadow of something like that? Huh? That because my dad has money and has raised us means that he didn't love our mom? It's not me who has no idea, it's you." His words ghosted the air in a whisper, his mind screamed for him not to goad the man yet he was fed up of being told he had no idea, that he didn't understand and that he was just a child. He had cried over the loss time and time again whilst growing up, he had cried for the want of a mother and for the want of making the hurt his family was feeling go away. He didn't want to watch on powerlessly with how strongly they grieved or how the simplest of memories could bring a man as strong as his father to his knees. If anyone wanted to feel truly helpless then that was a feeling he would happily give away.

Taio blew a trail of smoke out into the air, the smell sharp and dry and overly sweet making Alan's eyes water more than ever. He wanted to seem strong yet the anger inside was buckling him.

"Jeff Tracy has truly developed the art of passing the buck." He barked a laugh, rolling his eyes as he shook his head, standing and returning back to his chair behind the desk. "Five sons to take on the emotional weight of responsibility - clever. Not something I had even thought of." Alan frowned, not understanding the turn in the conversation but Taio ignored him and continued, smiling to himself as he thought it through. "You know why I had you snatched? No? I wanted to flare some kind of emotional response in the unbreakable man, yet now I realize just how easily I could break him. Maybe I shouldn't have just targeted the one son, maybe I needed to take down the five walls that hold Jeff Tracy up on his pedestal." He gestured wildly with his hands.

"This has to end." He didn't for a second doubt that Taio would target his whole family if he felt he needed to, with the amount of alcohol the man had seemingly consumed it just made the horrible possibilities all the more likely. "I'm sorry that you don't like my dad, sometimes I don't even like him and I'm sure as hell that sometimes he doesn't like me, but he and my brothers are all I have and no matter what, I love them. Think of what you'd give to see Tess… to see your wife again, think of how much that would mean and then think of how much you'd be taking from my dad if you continued on this vendetta." He tried to find the mans eyes but he'd stood again and was once more gazing out the window. "Please Mr Zucco. What's this going to achieve?"

Taio leant against the wall and sighed, breath clouding up the window pane before him as he gazed out into the night. "I've got nothing left to live for." He muttered the words so quietly that Alan hardly heard, he leant forward, his free hand raised as he questioned whether or not to touch the man before him in what he hoped would be a reassuring gesture. Undecided the hand just hung in the air, a moment waiting to see the uncertain future.

"You have everything to live for." He didn't want to be dealing with this, he didn't want his own limited knowledge to be the make or break of the situation. "You have to live for the people you've lost, we all do…" Alan took a deep breath, his own curiosity niggling away at the back of his mind with words he knew should have been left unsaid. "Ring the hospital, find out about Tess."

Taio rolled his head back and pushed himself away from the wall, Alan's hand fell as the man turned back towards him with a key in his hand. He couldn't help but hide the hint of a smile as Taio proceeded to unlock the handcuff and pull the teen to his feet, dusting his shoulders as though he'd gathered dust in the relatively short time he'd been there.

"Are you going to call them?" He asked, turning to the door through which they'd entered the room, a hand on his throbbing ribs but the relief of being released masking the pain.

The man gave his own smile, whiskey abandoned he took Alan's arm and squeezed it painfully.

"No." He shook his head and let out a grunt of amusement. "I'm going to kill you and then I'm going to destroy your family, piece by piece."

A/N
I really wanted this chapter to be a lot longer but I feel I've kept you waiting long enough, so you can have a cliff hanger with the promise of lots of action from now on! Yay! The next chapter is held hostage till I get lots of tasty reviews x