Hiya! Thanks for reading. I know it's short, really short, but I kind of wanted to wrap up everything but before I moved on to the next part of the story. This is not the end, at least not yet! Please review and thank you so much to those of you that already have. Enjoy!
Stephen
I felt like I was inches away from tears. I'd tried to keep myself composed and strong infront of Brendan but now the impact of what I'd just done finally hit me with the force of a truck slamming straight into my heart.
I knew, deep down, that this was for the best but I still couldn't quite believe it. I was leaving Brendan, for real this time. No going back. No changing my mind. No more moments of weakness that would find me standing outside his door when I knew that he was home alone. No more us. Just me, Stephen Hay. Amy and the kids weren't coming with me, at least not yet. So, it was me and Alex. I had a sense of Devá vu; it felt like I was that kid again, messed up and full of pent up rage and hate; before Amy had fixed me, before I gotten control of myself; just one kid with a screwed up life but no responsibilities and no weaknesses. How much had I changed; Amy had healed me and Leah and Lucas had kept me grounded. Then Brendan had trapped me with my own desires and emotions. But now, I felt free. Free of the remorse I still felt due to my past with Amy, free of the duty of looking after the kids and free of my love for Brendan. This couldn't be real, could it? Was I really stronger than I had thought; stronger than Brendan had thought, because surely he hadn't expected me to just wallk away. It was never truly over between us but it was now. Everything: gone. But I wouldn't regret it, couldn't regret it. This had been my choice and I would stand by it, even if it killed me. Even if it felt like my heart was being crushed into dust.
"Are you okay?" Asked Alex, looking at me with concern before returning his eyes to the road.
"Yeah." I sighed, "Just get me out of here."
I looked out of the window as Hollyoaks village flew by. It was raining now, drops of water sliding down the glass like the tears I longed to cry. But I couldn't cry them, I didn't think I had any left. So, instead of crying like the old Ste would've, I just took a deep breath, calmed my frazled nerves and welcomed the future as I left my past behind me.
Rachey Ayy xx