Feudal Affair

I don't own Inuyasha

Chapter III

The sun was high but gentle against her skin, the basket next to her lay mostly empty aside from the three miniscule carrots that she'd pulled from the garden. A few of the other villagers had joined her and were tending to a few rows down. Their chatter was filled with laughter amongst each other. She averted her gaze after a quick nod as one of the women met her eyes and smiled with a wave. Rin pulled another of the carrots from the soil, prolonging her task before looking skyward. Those people were happy with their existence here. They'd never known the life of a traveler, the excitement of being amongst loved ones and never knowing where your next journey would take you. They'd never know how many meadows laid to the north or south of this village or the cool breezes climbing into the mountains that were so refreshing you could drink the moisture of the air. This village would not tell them stories of villages far and away that were both welcoming and unwelcoming to a strange group of travelers. It would not tell them the stories of demons and humans that sought to conquer the lands. They'd never know the exhilaration of watching her lord in battle. Every moment, every day that she'd spent with Sesshoumaru in her youth had been an experience and a blessing. She would not deny that there were times that she had been afraid and possibly unsure that they would make it through the challenges that they faced but as long as she was with Sesshoumaru it didn't matter. She'd already experienced enough of her life in abandonment, a dead family, a village never wanting her or caring enough to see that she survived. Her death would have meant nothing to them. It took the inquisitiveness of a demon, the showing of even the slightest interest in the fact that there were bruises present, to get her to smile. The tiny gesture of looking her in the face and seeing into his eyes let her know she would be safe, that she mattered. He gave her hope that life did not have to become a bleak and senseless battle of surviving to survive. Yet, now she was in a position she feared would lead her back to a road she'd traveled with only a dead end to meet her.

The thought left her in panic as she clutched her chest, struggling to catch her breath, the feeling of the air itself creating walls and closing in on her. She feared screaming would draw attention only causing her to choke. For a moment she met eyes again with the woman who had smiled at her only to see her expression now full of concern before she hastened to get help. Her breaths continued in short spurts and every moment she attempted to calm herself she failed, losing control with the sight of the present. Her heart raced as she lost touch with the ground beneath her.

"Rin!"

Kohaku held her as he attempted to be calm as he watched Rin struggle to catch her breath. He was sure that after six months of marriage he should be used to this but it never failed to frighten him. The first time this had happened had been on their wedding night. He'd initially thought Rin was having a nightmare choking between an attempt to scream and breathe. When she'd finally come around that night, he'd asked her what had happened. She'd told him that she was remembering when she'd been attacked by wolves. He was sure that he'd never seen her react this way when they were younger and they'd grown up close. Rin hardly ever mentioned thinking of the wolves. Both of them had pasts that were unworthy to dwell on and Rin had always been a person of the present, enjoying the moments that life offered right then and that was what he loved about her. But since that night the episodes had increased and become unpredictable leaving him confused and concerned for her health.

Kohaku did his best to reassure her, encouraging her to slow down her breaths. He felt relieved as she laid her head against his shoulder. He kissed her forehead as she squeezed his hand in an effort to let him know that she was okay.

Kohaku sat next to Rin as she watched the rain falling from their window.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you."

"Were you thinking about the wolves or the meidou again?"

"Um…no, I just panicked."

"About what?"

"It was just a moment I guess…nothing specific."

Rin hated herself for lying to him but telling the truth would hurt worse.

"This is getting worse. I've seen you thinking a lot lately, you don't seem like yourself."

"It's nothing, really, I'm fine."

"I'm worried about you."

"I don't want you to worry. Everything is okay. I promise."

Kohaku nodded as he kissed her and placed his arms around her.

"I love you."

"I love you too." Rin closed her eyes reminding herself of what she told Sesshoumaru about how she loved Kohaku as a friend. She knew that saying those three words in this moment with Kohaku as her husband was a lie and every single one of them hurt.

"I didn't want to have to tell you this now, but I have to leave in the morning. There's another job for me west of here and I'm afraid it might take me away for a while. But if you want me to stay just say so...I don't have to take it...I can stay here if you need me to..."

"It's okay. You should go."

"You think you can manage?"

Rin nodded, "Yeah."

"I'll let Sesshoumaru know to keep an eye on you."

"Kohaku..."

"I know you don't need someone protecting you. I just want to make sure someone's around if you have another one of those attacks like you had today. That's all."

Rin shook her head wondering when the human and demon would both stop being overprotective of her, "Fine."

…

Rin smirked as she saw him approach, "You're late."

"I see you're doing well. My job here is done." Sesshoumaru returned his own smirk as he turned to leave.

"Wait!" Rin ran to grab his arm as she smiled.

"I thought I was late."

"It can be overlooked for a few more moments of your time."

"Would you like to take a walk?" He quirked a brow at her.

"Of course. I'd like to explore a place that no one else knows."

The sun drifted southward as they explored every inch of each other, trading places in a game of predator and prey. Rin placed her hands against his chest, straddling him as she took charge of the ride. She didn't wait for him to protest as she kissed him gently getting him to relax underneath her. She knew Sesshoumaru preferred to at least feel like he was in control. It was his nature but it didn't take much convincing and he usually let her have her way. His hands searched the curves of her hips at every motion. As much as he preferred being on top he would never again deny her this position again. The vantage of her body was beyond pleasing as he felt her taking both of them into ecstasy. She was fearless and beautiful without a comparison to any human or demon standard only igniting his desire fulfill her wishes. Rin sighed with satisfaction crossing her arms against his chest as she looked into his gaze. Sesshoumaru brushed escaping strands of her hair back behind her ear as he kissed her again. "Damn." Rin smiled not expecting that explanation. Sesshoumaru had a habit of surprising most when they least expected it. He had the ability to destroy multiple demons without blinking an eye, a perfect destruction and yet she could look into his eyes now and see the gentleness, the compassion he held in moments like these. She could feel his love.

Sesshoumaru let her lay in his arms. The night becoming their cover under a waning crescent moon. He concentrated on the stillness of the night not ready to leave her again but he had no choice. Rin was married despite whatever they considered themselves at this moment. Still, he'd vowed to be at her side whenever she needed him no matter what the capacity. Though it wasn't his fault, Kohaku would never be able to provide Rin with the happiness that she truly desired.

Rin rested her head on his chest, the steady rise and fall gave a feeling of stability even when everything in her world was unstable. She found herself whispering although she was unsure why. No one could hear them and Sesshoumaru would have warned her if anyone was near.

"You'll never have to question my love for you. So when I say I love you would you be able to say the words back…and mean them?"

"There's no reason to ask. I love you and I always will."

Rin played her hand against Sesshoumaru's comparing them and gently sliding each finger to his palm. The gesture was soothing as he watched her lose herself in the task. She seemed at ease, the corners of her mouth pulled into a gentle smile. He could only assume that in this moment, time had stopped and there was no other life that existed to her. This was the way he enjoyed seeing her, this was the way he wanted to think of her in the village. But he knew differently and Kohaku had only further alarmed him with the knowledge that Rin's health was a concern and had been since they'd been married. Yet, she'd chosen to keep the details to herself never once mentioning anything. He wasn't sure why she felt the need to hide it.

"Kohaku told me about what happened to you yesterday. When did you plan to tell me?"

"These moments I have with you are for us to enjoy."

"Do you know what's causing it?"

"I used to watch the sky with you hoping to catch a shooting star. I remember one night when I did and I made a wish. The stars were beautiful that night, just like they are now."

Sesshoumaru nodded to himself, remembering what she had wished, as he agreed with her. Maybe Rin's definition of forever with him had nothing to do with time and everything to do with happiness.

A/N: More to come soon. Thanks for reading and reviewing!