Okay as promised Carol is starting to get a bit softer. Thank you all for reading so far and I hope you enjoy! Big thanks to my beta Jaded79 for going over this chapter for me. Let me know what you think

Chapter 24

Letting go.

The mission had been a total success, they had infiltrated the base undetected and moved their way through killing those they had to but giving them a chance to surrender. Unfortunately most of the guards hadn't been in a surrendering mood, but nonetheless they had made it to the holding cells and ushered nearly fifty prisoners, men, women and children to waiting cars. She had been very glad they had borrowed one of Rick's trucks. After setting some well-placed charges, they had destroyed the base and anything left inside it.

Carol looked at the families in the back of her SUV; they had gotten their just in time. These poor people had been put through hell. Pulling inside the prison grounds they started helping people out, the medical people taking charge and getting them into the clinic. She helped a woman in her forties from the SUV and her fourteen year old daughter, when the woman grasped her, hugging her tightly like she was afraid to let go.

"Thank you so much," she whispered into Carol's hair. Carol nodded before pulling back to look at the woman. "They took us three weeks ago, we were running from walkers when they found us, we thought they were there to help us but when we got into their car they pushed my husband out and shot him in the leg and left him for the walkers," she sobbed holding Carol's hands tightly telling her their story.

"I'm so sorry about your husband but you are safe here, I promise," Carol replied rubbing the woman's arm hoping to reassure her. Andrea had come out to help bring people in and found herself listening to this woman's gut wrenching story.

"They beat me and raped me, I fought them at first but they said they would leave my beautiful Josie alone if I didn't fight them," she told Carol, pulling her daughter close to her as her daughter sobbed into her mother's side. "But there was one guy, he was always looking at her, he came in and attacked Josie, hit her, started ripping her clothes off, I tried to stop him but he knocked me down, I thought all hope was lost and then you came in, like an angel in the night and saved us, you saved my baby," she cried harder moving to hug Carol again.

"They would have stolen my baby's innocence, you have no idea how much it means to us that you came for us, that you saved us, if you had been even a few minutes later…" Her sobbed choked in her throat at the thought of what could have happened to her daughter.

"You are both going to be safe here I promise you," Carol spoke stepping back. "And if you ever need to talk there are people here to help, to listen… don't bottle it all inside believe me when I say it will consume you, now Beth will take you and your daughter to the clinic to be checked over," she smiled as Beth ushered the two women away.

"Oh my god." Carol turned at the sound of Andrea's voice only to get an armful of the woman as Andrea hugged her hard. "I am so sorry that I called you cold, I was wrong," she said before pulling back.

"Don't worry about it."

"No I do worry about it. Carol I get why you do what you do, if you hadn't have tortured that leader that woman's daughter would have been raped and god knows what else could have happened to the others." Carol just nodded. "By the way Hershel wants you in the clinic like now," Andrea laughed.

"Right um can you make sure everyone we brought back is thoroughly checked over, not just medically either but for bites and scratches too, just to be sure and then make sure they all eat and drink water." Andrea nodded as Carol moved to head inside the prison.

"Carol," Andrea called out, she turned to face her. "You know what you said to that woman about not bottling the pain… well it's good advice." Andrea didn't give her a chance to reply as she turned to help people out of the cars. Sighing, Carol moved inside knowing she was right… she needed to let it all go before it killed her.

She moved into the clinic and it was buzzing with life, people moved around helping others and Carol couldn't help but think it was good they had extended the clinic. Hershel saw her as she entered and waved him over smiling at her.

"You did an amazing job Carol, I mean Sophie," he stumbled to correct himself.

"Carol's fine, Hershel." He smiled nodding.

"So many lives saved, you should be proud," he complimented her.

"Yeah it's a good thing we took one of Rick's trucks." He laughed and nodded before patting the bed silently telling her to sit; as she did he moved to get some equipment ready. "There are a lot of sick people here maybe you should see to them first," she suggested looking around at the busy clinic.

"You are just as important as everyone here, maybe more as you need to be fit and healthy to save even more lives… besides we have many medical personal now doctors, surgeons, vets, nurses and so on, so I'm all yours." She laughed softly.

"Okay."

"Alright, let's see if you managed to keep the binding clean." She moved to take off her bulletproof vest and her black long sleeve top, leaving her in just a black singlet. "Well it's not clean, that's for sure." She looked down at the patch seeing it was almost as dark as her top because of dirt.

"Sorry," she smiled. "It just when we first got there we were trying to get in unseen so there was a lot of crawling in the dirt and I didn't take the time to change my shirt before I left so there was a pretty big hole there," she tried to explain.

"It's alright dear, you were in a battle situation I guess keeping a patch clean was the last thing on your mind." She nodded smiling; she couldn't help the hiss as he pulled the patch back. He moved pouring water on it to get it clean so he could get a good look at it. "Just as I thought, you have an infection, I really wish you had let me stitch it before you left."

"Sorry Hershel but it really would have slowed me down and I couldn't afford that, so what do we do now?"

"Well I'm going to have to clean it and stitch it, you'll need antibiotics for at least two weeks which means no going out on missions, you need to take it easy."

"Listen Hershel…," she went to protest but the sound of Michonne voice cut her off.

"Don't worry Doc, I'll make sure she sticks to your orders." She turned seeing Michonne and Daryl moving in.

"Michonne…"

"Don't argue with me, it's two weeks not two years… you can busy yourself training new recruits." Carol sighed caving.

"Fine but only for two weeks."

"Good girl, I just wanted to report in everyone has been checked, no bites or scratches and Eric and William just reported back from the rebel base, nothing survived the blast."

"Good," Carol nodded.

"I am going to eat and shower and then sleep the day away, meet me for drinks tonight."

"Sure," she smiled as Michonne left. She looked up at Daryl's eyes, he was smiling at her and she couldn't help but smile back before turning to look at Hershel.

"Now I'm going to have to give you an anesthetic to numb the area so I can stitch you up," Hershel warned her but she couldn't stop from pulling back.

"No anesthetic." Daryl moved to her side.

"Carol, this is going to be extremely painful, not to mention if you flinch while I'm stitching you up…"

"I won't flinch… look, what if something happens? What if there is an attack?"

"Then let the rest of us handle it," Daryl said placing his hand over hers, he expected her to pull away from him and found himself stunned when she didn't.

"Daryl…"

"You heard Michonne, the whole rebel base was destroyed, we don't get a lot of trouble here which is why we named it a safe zone, please don't fight me just this once," he said, his eyes pleading and she felt her resolve waver.

"Alright but no harsh pain killers, I don't like being sluggish, it makes me anxious and paranoid," she tried to explain.

"Deal," Hershel smiled at her. "Just some ibuprofen alright." Carol nodded agreeing.

After Hershel had cleaned and stitched her wound, he gave her two ibuprofen and a bottle of antibiotics with strict instructions to take three tablets everyday till they were finished. Moving out into the hall, Daryl walked her to her room. She had to admit she would be glad to get some sleep, she was exhausted and Hershel had said she had lost a fair amount of blood and needed to rest. Stopping at her door, she turned to face Daryl.

"Thank you for walking me to my room."

"You're welcome, just please get some rest."

"I will I promise, I'm beat anyway but if anything happens please wake me." He sighed nodding, one thing hadn't changed, she still worried way too much.

"Sleep well," he whispered moving forward and kissing her softly on the cheek before turning and leaving her. She could still feel his lips burning her cheek and she couldn't help but smile as she went into her room and finally slept.

Daryl had gone to wake her, bringing her a hot meal and a drink for dinner; but when he had arrived at her room, he was surprised to find it empty, thinking for sure she would still be resting. Moving down the hall, he headed for the pub thinking she must have gone for drinks with Michonne, but as he went to pass the music room they had set up for the kids as part of their schooling, he heard the unmistakable sound of her singing.

These days I haven't been sleeping, staying up playing back myself leaving, when your birthday passed and I didn't call. And I think about summer, all the beautiful times I watched you laughing from the passenger side, realized that I loved you in the fall. Then the cold came, the dark days, when fear crept into my mind. You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye.

He placed the tray quietly on a nearby table, not wanting to disturbed her; he watched as she played the piano and sang noticing the bottle of tequila that sat on top of the piano barely touched. She still sounded as sweet as an angel and he couldn't take his eyes off of her. Carol closed her eyes, lost in the music, in the feel of it, in the freedom, she had written this song months ago and although she had never admitted it before, she had written it while thinking of Daryl and her regrets for leaving him.

So this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night. And I go back to December all the time. Turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you, wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine. I go back to December, turn around and change my own mind. I go back to December all the time.

She wished she could go back, to change things and not run from him, from her own fear and insecurities but she also knew she wouldn't change it either. If she hadn't left, she wouldn't be who she is now, she wouldn't have helped save the people she had and she could never regret that. But she wished there was a way to have both worlds, where she could still be strong, independent and help make the world a better place, a place worth living in but also have Daryl, that love, that devotion, that connection, but she wondered if it was even possible? Could they juggle both worlds, and when he found out the whole truth about her, would he even want to?

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right, and how you held me in your arms that September night, the first time you ever saw me cry. Maybe this is wishful thinking, probably mindless dreaming. If we loved again I swear I'd love you right.

Would he be angry? Would he hate her? The thought brought tears to her eyes and she just wanted to hide away and cry, but she knew she couldn't. It was time she stopped running, it was time she faced her past, her demons and came to terms with her mistakes.

I'd go back in time and change it but I can't. So if the chain is on your door, I understand.

She just prayed he would forgive her.

But this is me swallowing my pride, standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night, and I go back to December. Turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you, wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine. I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright. I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind. I go back to December all the time. All the time.

He moved across the room looking down at her, he could tell by the lyrics she sang that she was thinking of him or he hoped she was. He touched her hand making her look up at him, eyes shining with tears begging to be let free.

"I think it's time we talked," he spoke softly. She took a deep breath, nodding, standing from her seat. They moved out into the hall stopping at the door of their old room. She tried to calm herself, her heart pounded madly in her chest and her palms were crazy sweaty, and even though she hated feeling this way, she knew he was right. They did need to talk, but for the first time in a year she was scared to death even though she knew it was time to face her past and let it finally go.