Chapter Four: The Little Things
"One week, one pound, and one ounce" reads the tag on little Sofia's incubator.
Olivia's usually the last to see Callie's daughter, not that she's complaining. After things settled down with Callie, Olivia told herself she would let the daily crowd die down before she helped herself to some one on one time with the baby. Although she didn't even know Callie was pregnant before she arrived, she still felt close to the little girl.
"Hi." she mouths to the slowly moving child. Even though Sofia is painfully small, nobody left the room without a smile.
She studies Sofia. She notices how small her limbs are and how weak and fragile she is. A twinge of sadness hits Olivia. She's feeling for her.
"It's going to be okay," she whispers. She repeats herself once more until someone clears his throat and disturbs her privacy.
He watches her with calm eyes. He admires the way she instantly helped out as soon as she stepped in. He studies the way she is so easily attracted to children, much like everybody else here, and how well she treats them. She could be doing a million things instead of showing love to a child that she doesn't even know but she chooses to do it anyway.
He likes that.
She turns around to see Mark with his phone in his hand, "I need to take a video for Callie," he tells her and shakes his phone a little as if to prove it to her.
"Good morning!" Mark struts in Callie's room with Olivia at his side, "Baby report."
She leans against the doorway while she watches Mark show Callie the video. She focuses on his eagerness when telling her the good news. Her lips pull into a tiny smile. Then she notices the sadness is Callie's eyes as she watches the video. It's blended in with the intense interest and yearning for her baby. It's clear she's not sad about the baby's condition but the fact she can't see her baby. This video is the closest she can be to Sofia right now.
"How are you?" Mark asks Callie.
The way he asks sends a comforting warmth up Olivia's spine. His question is enveloped within a sigh but full of compassion and geniality. The way his voice sounded makes Olivia want to hear it over and over again. It seems to be the little things about him that attract her to him.
Callie proceeds to tell him about her progress.
He congratulates her, in the same soft tone. Olivia's already half-smile grows into a full one. She's lucky it's at the appropriate time – Callie's news is a great reason to be smiling. He turns to leave but stops at Olivia.
"Are you staying all day or are you going home before me?" He asks.
The way he refers his own house as just a simple "home" makes Olivia feel more at ease with staying with him.
It's the little things.
Olivia straightens up and tucks her hair behind her ear, "I'll stay until you're done."
"Well, I have a surgery in a little bit and it could be a few hours. So, just incase you change your mind." Mark hands her a small ring with keys, "That one is the one you'll want to use." He points to the shortest of the three keys.
Olivia thanks him and he continues out of the room, glancing at Olivia one more time before turning around the corner. She looks back at the appropriate time because they make eye contact right before he rushes off.
Callie and Cristina are both staring at her, interrogating her with their eyes. Olivia's smile vanishes and she shifts uneasily from one foot to another.
"So," Cristina begins once Miranda leaves. She turns to Olivia, "How are you holding up with Mark?"
Her voice is suggestive, like she wants something. She wants Olivia to gush about how fantastic it is to see Mark come out of the shower, only in a towel, every morning. How sexy he looks when he's hard at work on his computer before he goes to bed. That she's sad because she's only on his couch and not in his bed. With him. Although all these statements are true, Olivia keeps them to herself.
"Fine. He's being very generous," Olivia says. There's a slight dissatisfaction on Cristina's face because she didn't get the gossip she wanted.
"He's been a lot happier since you got here," Callie chimes in. Her voice is still somber but she continues, "He likes you, Liv."
"No," Olivia chuckles nervously, "No, it's you and it's the baby. I'm just staying on his couch."
"He didn't give you the bedroom?" Cristina asks, surprised.
"He offered but I didn't take it. It's fine." She really wants to drop the subject. Olivia's tempted to bring up Callie's baby just to get away from the topic of Mark but she doesn't want to upset her any more than she already is.
"Hey, I'm gonna get a cup of coffee and let you rest. I'll be back in a little bit." She half-heartedly smiles and exits the room.
Olivia stares down into the swirl of brown liquid in her cup. She adds a little more sugar and continues to stir. She's concentrating more on her own thoughts than she is on her cup of coffee. The last time she left Seattle, she left angry, annoyed, and promised herself that she would never be vulnerable around Mark. She would never be persuaded like some of the other women were.
So how did she end up staying in his apartment?
Olivia sighs and a small pain in her wrist reminds her that she's been stirring for far too long. She blinks back to reality and throws the wooden stirrer out.
"Olivia Benson," comes a voice from behind.
Olivia caps her cup and turns around. She's face to face with an old friend that she failed to say hi to when she first arrived.
"It would take us a week to finally say hello to each other!" Addison laughs while she hugs Olivia.
"I saw you running around the hospital a few times but I didn't want to bother you." Olivia releases her embrace from Addison, "You looked busy."
"Well, I'm free now." Addison takes Olivia's cup and sips from it, "How have you been? Word in the hospital is that you're housing with Mark Sloan while you're here."
Olivia scoffs.
"He's a good guy, Liv. He's always been but he's changed over time since you were last here."
She nods and stares ahead, "I'm sure."
"You still have a thing for him, don't you? That's why you're staying with him?" Addison asks with a quirked eyebrow.
Olivia scrunches up her face in disagreement and shakes her head, "I don't have a thing for him." Something about saying that makes her stomach twist in a knot.
"Ah," Addison replies, unconvinced.
It's like they're in high school.
"Are you sure?" She continues.
Before Olivia can answer with more denial, a beeping beats her to it. Addison looks to her hip and reads her pager.
"Shit," she hisses, "I've got to run but we'll grab drinks later." With that said, she rushes off.
Olivia nods and watches her disappear around the corner.
She's not sure and she hates it.