33
Harper's first year in "big kid" school had almost come to a close; it had gone well and Jamie had paved the way, giving the "Vauseman" name a good reputation. They looked forward to the upcoming summer and while they'd still have to get up for work and camp, it wouldn't be as early, homework wouldn't need to be checked, clothes wouldn't need daily ironing.
The little phone in the fourth grade classroom rang, "James...," he looked up surprised as his teacher called out, "you need to go to the main office."
"Oooooooh," his classmates snickered as if he was in trouble.
He went up to the front of the classroom to grab a pass and walk out the door, when she said, "take your things to go home."
He came over to her, "do you know why? Why am I going home early?" While he was excited to bolt out of school hours ahead of schedule, his voice quaked with mild worry.
"I don't know, they just asked if you could come to the office with your things for an early dismissal."
He put his school supplies back into the box in his desk, got his backpack and lunchbox from the closet and went down to the office.
As he was nearing the office, he saw Harper's purple sparkly sneakers stretched out from the long wooden bench. She looked tired but her eyes brightened up a little when she saw him; he walked up to the tall divider to the main part of the office,
"excuse me?"
The secretary raised her head in acknowledgement.
"Am I in trouble or something?," he asked her hoping for a quick answer. Harper got down off the bench and leaned into him, "I'm sick."
The secretary smiled and nodded, able to hear the younger of the two but not see her.
"Why am I going home though?," he asked slightly shoving Harper away from him, he noted she felt a little warm and realized she wasn't faking it.
"Just have a seat, the nurse will come talk to whoever comes to pick you two up."
He nodded and tossed his backpack on the bench before sitting down. Harper climbed up beside him with her backpack still on her back, there was no bounce in her step.
"So what's wrong?"
She shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know."
"Do you feel like you're gonna throw up or something?"
She shook her head back and forth, "I feel yucky... and tired," she said leaning into him. She drove him crazy, she was always in the way, wanting to be a part of whatever he was doing regardless of the triviality, but when she was sick she was essentially lifeless. Her fatigued, hot body sulked down until she was laying in his lap. He pulled his hoodie, which he was forced to bring daily "just in case," and balled it up to shove underneath her cheek. An hour later Piper walks into the office flustered and sees Harper sleeping on Jamie's legs. The nurse is called to the office and she gives her two cents,
"...and with the fever, and the rash, she said you haven't used any new soaps in the house or anything."
"No we haven't," she tried to recall.
"And neither of them received the Varicella vaccine, correct?," she said looking through their immunization record one more time.
"They got a million vaccines, which one is that?"
"Chicken pox? I'm not saying that's what it is, you should confirm it with their doctor, I personally haven't seen it in a long time, but I know there have been one or two cases in the school recently."
After their doctor discussed probabilities of what the rash could be, he discouraged blood work confirmation and decided to observe for the classic viral rash. As if his hearing tunneled, all Jamie could hear was that this meant staying out of school for one to two weeks. By the time they got home, Alex had already stopped at the store to get calamine lotion, a new bottle of children's Tylenol, oatmeal bath and some snacks for their lockdown. While Harper's limbs hung loosely through Piper's tight grip, Jamie went over to Alex,
"so there's a shot but we didn't get it and now we get to stay home from school for the whole week, or maybe two!"
"Yeah I know, that shot, it was new, mom and I didn't think it was best for you."
"Wait, so you made sure we didn't get it?"
"Right."
"You're the best mom ever!"
"Yeah well these pox are itchy, you can't scratch them or they're going to leave scars all over your body. Lots of baths," she says pointing a finger at him, "and we'll put this cream on the bumps to help stop the itching once they come."
"I feel fine, I don't care, whatever gets me out of school. I can watch movies all day... can I watch Netflix?"
Piper and Alex made a schedule of who was staying home on certain days while the other went to work. Within a few days Harper's back and trunk were covered in itchy blisters. She practically lived in the bathtub as she found the oatmeal baths to be the most soothing. About a week later most of her pox were scabbed over when Jamie's were just beginning. Unlike his younger sister, he hadn't handled the itch so well. They tried oatmeal baths, and the calamine lotion which helped for a few minutes but he still scratched. Piper scolded him repeatedly and threatened to secure his hands together but he couldn't help it. They tried a few home remedies and found a spray starch usually used for un-wrinkling clothes was the only thing that would ease his urge to scratch. The spray was cold so even though he knew the spray would help, he'd try to stay still for the first spray but it usually ended up with one of them chasing him around as if they were trying to smother a bug.
"You're the worst mom ever!," he shouts genuinely miserable with itchy bumps but laughs at being chased for the fourth time that day by the mom he can outrun.
Alex slows mid-chase, out of breath, the can hangs loosely in her grasp.
He turns around and realizes he lost her but he's still so itchy, he jogs back over in his underwear and sees her hand pressed against the wall, as she continues to catch her breath. She raises the can, half-assed but he's still out of range, the mist will just coat the floor.
"Sorry kid," she says in honesty for making them both go through this, but the risk at having a vaccine, that hadn't been out very long, injected into her children's bodies hardly seemed worth the risk.
He steps closer, "it's okay, you can spray me, I won't run."
Around the tenth day of Chicken Pox lockdown, Alex and Piper were bordering stir crazy. They'd made plans to go out the following day, Alex was dyeing her hair in their bathroom.
"Babe, why do you still do this?," she asked as the brunette squinted into the mirror and painted her hair.
"Your two greys blend into your blondes, mine stand out a little more. Can you help me with the back?," she asked lowering her aching arms to her sides, the crepitus releasing from her shoulder.
Piper reluctantly slipped on a pair of gloves and painted the hair from the nape of Alex's neck and continued up the back of her head, "you know I don't find you any less attractive right?"
"My hair is literally plastered against my head and this is when you're trying to tell me that you still find me as attractive as you have in the past? At least wait til its done. It's more believable."
"I'm being honest, and I think it would look really cute if you just left a streak here?," she pointed to the space above her ear, "...especially since you have it pulled half up all the time, it would totally work."
"Pipes I already feel old every single day, I... I'm just more comfortable with it like this okay?"
"Okay," she said pecking her shoulder and handed over the hair dye brush.
"I thought you were going out tonight?," he asks Piper from the bathtub, thinking it was a little early to be getting ready when he'd just eaten lunch; she scrunches her hair trying to make the best use of her hair product, she finishes up her make up.
"We're leaving any minute," she says looking at her watch, "up and out," she says to Jamie wanting him to be dressed by the time Nicky got there. She turned her body to the side and smoothed out her sundress when Harper walked in. Jamie pulls the shower closed and rinses off quick while Harper tells Piper, "you look pretty." She scrunches her nose and smells her mother's perfume. The shower turns off and Jamie's wet arm slinks out and grabs a towel. He wraps it around his waist while Piper crouches down, "does my make up look okay?," she asks Harper. Jamie rolls his eyes as Harper nods her head, "can I have some?." Piper lightly brushes some blush onto her cheeks.
He never understood the need for dates when his parents saw each other everyday. Why pay for dinner somewhere else if the fridge was stocked with food you bought in the first place? And spending immeasurable amounts of time getting ready "to look nice" for the same person who saw you go to bed with spots of expensive white or green skin cream, and wake up with messed up hair. Women. He combs his hair back and tries to exit the bathroom, when Piper grabs his arm and pulls him back in, and sets the calamine lotion on the sink. She spot paints his body with the pink cream and fans it quickly to help it dry when the doorbell rings.
"I'll get it!," Harper shouts and almost knocks Jamie over on her attempted way out to try to let Nicky in.
"Ah no you wont," Piper tells her, "Alex!," she yells out for her wife to answer it before Harper breaks loose and does it herself. The doorbell rings again, "ugh," she hisses and washes her hands off in the sink hurriedly while Jamie scampers to the door next to Harper, always excited for the days when Nicky came to watch them.
"Who is it?," he asks through the door, but there's no answer.
"Will you...," she says pushing them both back from the door and looks through the peephole, she chuckles, a smile breaks across her face. She opens the door and Alex hands her a single orchid. She snatches it sheepishly and admires it for a moment before pressing her lips against those of the brunette letting them linger until she hears Harper's giggle.
"Think it's funny?," she asks Harper, whose hands are covering her mouth, while she pulls Alex back into their apartment by her hand.
"You guys are sooo weird," Jamie declares while retreating to their living room.
"You guys are so weird," Alex repeats mocking him. "What else needs to get done?," she asks Piper.
"I haven't packed anything to eat," she says in reference to the outdoor picnic they'd planned on.
"Well are you hungry now?," she says hinting that she doesn't know if she can wait to make them a lunch to pack up and go.
"Are you?," she reflects sensing the tone.
"Kind of? We can still go to the Cloisters, we'll just eat somewhere first."
"Sounds fine, can you actually check his back and make sure I covered all the spots?"
Soon after Nicky arrives and starts raiding their kitchen for something to eat. She makes herself a sandwich as her friends are getting ready to head out the door, she takes the saltines down and heads into the living room to join the kids.
"Hey Vause remember these?," she says lifting the box.
Alex looks at her for a moment, and while Nicky makes three stacks of six crackers, her gaze changes, "you can't have them try that," she says stepping in over her kids.
"Who says I can't?"
"Nick, they can choke!"
"Well it's a good thing I know CPR then isn't it?" She'd used that line at every available opportunity, instantaneously making the brunette shut her mouth.
She waved her friends out the door and held off on the saltine challenge. She showed them a magic trick, with pleads to show them repeatedly as they tried to figure out how it worked. Harper sat on her lap and played with her necklace as Jamie grunted in frustration every time he thought he figured out the trick, but failed. Harper traced her finger along Nicky's locket, "what's this?," she said forgetting about the necklace and pressing her index finger against the top of the wide vertical scar along her aunt's breastbone.
She frowned slightly, "that's my scar."
"You got hurt?," she asked. Jamie looked up having seen the scar himself before, once at the beach, but was told by Piper not to ask about it.
"I had an infection in my heart."
"An infection? Like the chicken pox?"
"No, a much worse infection and I had surgery," she pulled her shirt down slightly so they both could see the surgical scar,"... a long long time ago."
"When you were little like me?"
"No, I was older."
"Did your mom give you medicine? The purple kind? And make you drink soup?" Her hand rose to her chest, she traced the scar along her chest and held the locket in her hand. No, she wanted to tell the little girl looking up at her, no she didn't give me medicine, or tell me everything was going to be ok, or hold me or give me sips of water. But she had two great moms and she didn't want her image of what a great mom was to ever falter. "Yeah," she forced a smile and hugged her tight, "she gave me lots of medicine and made sure I was okay."
Piper and Alex arrive at La Marina in Washington Heights, they'd opted for outdoor seating, stealing any chance to soak up any warmth when the sun shone brightly. The view of the bridge along with the sand surrounding the deck was the respite they needed while being able to remain in their own city. After a late lunch they took a seat in the loungers on the sand and talked about anything and everything.
"So can we get back to the hair dye?," Piper pressed the issue.
"Can we not?," she raises a hand and looks away. "Wanna play ping pong?," she motions her head toward the table
Piper didn't want to start anything as their alone time was so limited, "sure," she says standing up from the lounge chair.
"Have we ever played ping pong?," Alex asks her not recalling ever having a match.
Piper curls an eyebrow, "I don't think so. Is that possible?"
"Do you know how to play?"
"You just hit the ball...?," Piper looks at her curiously.
They play for a bit, each having racked up 5 points, when the ball hits the net and rolls off the side of the table into the sand.
They both go to get the ball, "this is fun," Piper acknowledges their time alone while she rolls the neon orange ball around in her hand.
"Wanna make a friendly bet?," Alex asks from back at her end of the table.
"Friendly?," she looks at her wife suspiciously knowing she has something up her sleeve.
Alex shrugs a shoulder, "sexy," she mouths from her end of the table.
Piper snickers, "like what?"
The brunette wiggles her shoulders, "no idea."
Piper takes note of the tingle down her spine at the brunette's movement, "alright."
Alex steps closer toward Piper's end, she presses her backside against the table and leans her ear in to hear what Piper wants.
"I want you to do a dance."
The brunette's lips stretch to one side, her eyes glisten from the reflection of the Hudson, she looks back at Piper intrigued, "what kind of dance?"
Piper licks her lips and blows out, just hot from the thought, "a sexy dance...a lap dance? I don't know yet."
Alex feels her nerve ends tingle, she's slightly embarrassed but she won't let her win. "Alright," she says extending a hand.
"Uh uh," Piper shakes her head before shaking her hand, "and if you win?"
Alex places her hand back on the table and looks Piper up and down, "you have to take care of me for a night..."
Piper cocks her head to the side as if this is something new; she squints at her, "...and?"
"Dressed as a nurse... a naughty nurse."
Piper laughs out loud and shakes her head, "Alex..."
"Wanna play doctor instead?," she drawls into her ear.
Piper laughs again, "alright, deal," she says and shakes Alex's hand.
"You're going down Chapman," Alex taunts her from her end.
"That's what she said," Piper remarks, the setup having been too easy, "apparently for a whole night. Haven't we just established that's where the stakes have been raised?"
"Touche."
Piper serves and smacks the ball onto the table, over the net with a speed that caused Alex to whip her head as the ball whooshes past her. She turns back to Piper with her jaw dropped, her arms come out to her side.
"One and oh," Piper says bouncing in place.
"You just hit the ball," Alex wiggles her head, mocking Piper's earlier response to her question of her knowledge of the game.
Piper does a mini sensuous dance, "yeah well, you should've known that all well-bred girls play tennis, chess or bridge."
Alex shakes her head and proceeds to get her ass kicked royally, while Piper taunts her throughout their entire walk through the Cloisters, the ride home and in their elevator until they're outside their apartment door.
They go inside and not only are both of their kids wide awake with Nicky but there are bits of saltine crackers everywhere. Alex sarcastically thanks Nicky for the mess but notices her friend looks a little off. Piper picks up on Nicky's demeanor as well and gets the kids ready for bed.
"You alright?," Alex asks her.
"Yeah, yeah," she shrugs it off, "Harper asked me about the scar." Alex bit her lip and widened her eyes. "They know I had endocarditis, and heart surgery. They don't know how though, no worries."
"I'm not worried," she reassured the woman who sank back down into her couch. Alex dropped the crumbs she swept into her hand back onto the coffee table. "Hey, I'm not worried at all okay? If you're okay with them knowing, if they ask anything else, I can tell them, you don't have to."
"Now?! No," she doesn't give Alex a chance to answer, "I kind of like that they don't look at me as an addict."
"Former addict... give yourself some credit you haven't touched that shit in how long?"
Nicky opens her mouth and clears her throat, "doesn't mean I don't still want it... all the time. I'm still an addict."
Alex nods her head once, "they know I go with you to meetings, they don't know what the meeting are for, but regardless of how much you still want it, you don't still do it." She taps Nicky on her thigh when she doesn't look up in agreement. Instead she watches Nicky bring her hand to her chest. "Don't let your past shame you, especially not for the sake of my kids," she tells her; she still looks at the top of her friends head. "Nichols!," her voice raises in frustration, "I don't want them growing up thinking people are flawless, growing up with that shit Piper dealt with, uh uh. Everyone has their junk, and I'm all about the right timing... I hear you, but no shame, got it?"
"I'll try to remember that," she says with slight sarcasm.
Alex shoves her knee, they're the right words, but not the right tone. "You can stay here if you want, if you don't feel like going home."
"I'm good."
Alex sees Nicky out while Piper closes their kids' bedroom door, Alex can hear them giggling. "Was she alright?," Piper asked her concerned pointing at the front door.
"Are we ever really alright?," she says scratching her head, just slightly worried about Nichols. "She's got us," she says factually and hears their kids again, she snickers slightly. "Did they have good day?," she asks Piper already knowing that no matter what the topic of conversation was they would always have a good time with Nicky.
Alex filled Piper in on the extent of their kids' knowledge of Nicky's past; they talked for hours into the night, exchanging texts with Nicky, just to reassure themselves that she was home and safe and didn't need any additional support for the night. They talked about the fragility of life, the possibility that they may have never been blessed to have met Nicky Nichols if she had injected just a tiny bit more of the drug that Alex had spent over a decade importing. The reality, that they might one day need to come clean to their kids and risk altering the way they were perceived through their children's eyes, seemed to creep closer.
Exhausted they retreated to their bedroom, Piper climbed into bed as she watched Alex slowly exchange her clothes for a short black peignoir. She watched Alex wash her face clean, her hands gripping the edge of the sink, allowing the excess water to slowly drip away from her face. She slowly patted it dry, folded the face towel before slipping it over the rack and hitting their bathroom light off. She set her glasses on her nightstand, and crawled into bed next to Piper, turning her body inward in a silent request to be the little spoon. Piper stroked the dark hair back and settled it behind her neck, she kissed her softly along her arm, "I love you."
Alex turned her neck back toward Piper, why, "I love you too."
"You still owe me a dance," she whispered into Alex's ear, "I can be patient."
Alex turned her body more dramatically toward her and stared at her match.
Piper used her weight to push Alex back so she could regain her upper hand at being the big spoon, "just make sure you use this time to work on your choreography."
Alex laughed out loud as she felt the weight of Piper's arm settle over her own.
The next morning, Piper rests her soapy hands along Alex's shoulders. She drags her right hand down and cups the brunette's breast, her hand freezes, "I have to go pee pee," Harper announces and she lifts the lid up.
"Why aren't you using the other bathroom?," Piper asks her while Alex stifles the laugh at the mortified look on Piper's face.
"Jamie's in there."
"Alright, just hurry up."
"Where's mama?"
Piper's eyes widen while Alex turns her smirked face away. Piper pinches her forearm, "ow!," she dramatically mouths and rubs her skin.
"Uh... she left for work babe."
"But it was her day to stay home."
Piper kicked some of the water on the shower floor at Alex, "was it?"
"Yeah you stayed home yesterday. I'm flushing," she says giving her a heads up as the shower water always gets hot.
"She must've forgotten, I'll stay with you guys, it's okay." She hears Harper turn off the faucet from the sink.
Alex kisses her neck, giggling into the wet skin.
"But she didn't even say goodbye," Harper interrupts.
Alex's eyes immediately go sad, she shoves Piper slightly now realizing her daughter thinks she ditched them based on Piper's lie.
"You know what Harp, I bet she just went to get breakfast or something and she'll be back soon," she says through the shower and turns to Alex,"okay?," she mouths to her wife, trying to cover non-existent damage. Alex nods and starts sliding her hand down Piper's ass willing Piper closer.
"Like bagels?"
She wants to pant out but controls her voice, "yeah baby, like bagels."
The room is momentarily silent,
"but how does she know what bagel I want today?"
"I don't know Harper!," she snaps. "I'll call her, what kind of bagel do you want?"
"Everything."
"Yeah, you and me both."
Harper finally leaves, Alex shuts up Piper's bitching and starts off her morning the best way she knows how. Piper gets on her shirt for work, and waltzes out with her towel around her waist, while Alex throws on some clothes and grabs her wallet. Piper stands in the doorway of Harper and Jamie's room making small talk when they hear a thud and the slam of the door.
"What was that?"
"My everything bagel."