A/N: First of all let me start off with an apology. I try to post twice a month but at least once a month but I wound up abandoning you all for the summer and that was NEVER my intent. But since I've last posted I've had finals, an unhealthy obsession with video gaming channels on YouTube, a death (murder) in the family, an impromptu vacation, and a very recent surgery (on both of my arms) *if you want to know the details ask lol*. Not to mention my mother has a big surgery coming up and school is starting. Can we say hectic? So if that doesn't buy me some slack from my faithful readers, hopefully this update will.
On a brighter note thank you for all of the support. It helps SO much! It amazed/amazes me the people who favorited and followed recently, despite the fact that I haven't been updating like I should. So read and review and enjoy.
I knew I could not have my ladies in waiting from my side any longer and summoned them to return to their duties. As expected, Lady Jane was the last to return to her post, but I had too much on my mind to concern myself with her. When Madge returned to my chambers my anxiety calmed slightly but I knew it would not calm completely until I had word from the Lady Mary. That wasn't the complete truth. My anxiety would not be completely gone until I held a healthy Prince in my arms. Then and only then would I be the carefree girl of my youth; in love with a King who was in love with me. I stopped the direction of my thoughts before they could turn any sadder and provoke undesired and unwelcome tears. I turned back to the shirt I had been hemming when Nan returned. I could tell from the look on her face that we needed privacy so I went further into my rooms and pulled the curtain behind us. Still, out of habit, Nan looked around before handing me the letter.
"From your sister, Your Majesty", she whispered. Confused I opened the note to see but a few short sentences written down.
"Anne,
Since I will not be in your chambers to tell you this in person I must get this letter to you as soon as may be. There is one more thing you need to accomplish before our plans can begin. You need to, quietly, summon the Duke of Richmond to court. All of his Majesty's children must be embraced by their father for any plan of ours to be carried out with any success. Find George."
Sighing I looked back to Nan. "Fetch Madge and-". Looking down I saw another letter in her hand. "Is this Mary's letter? Katherine's daughter." She nodded and handed it to me. I opened it and quickly scanned it. I noticed that it was lacking any kind sentiment towards me; a thought which caused both irritation and understanding. None of that mattered any way now. What mattered is that the Lady Mary was considering my offer and that she was asking her mother for guidance. I could only hope that Katherine would agree. "Fetch Madge and have her bring George to me. Take this letter, guard it with your life, and make sure that the Duke of Suffolk receives it and that he leaves immediately."
"Yes Your Majesty," she curtsied and left. I returned back to my sewing but it was now halfhearted. I could not concentrate on sewing in a time such as this. I had a million thoughts in my head and I could not sort them.
"Lady Jane, would you read aloud from the Bible? I would have God's word to fill the quietness of my chambers." She looked uneasy for a moment before I remembered that though she could write it was only a little. I relieved her of her duty and had another lady take the task. I'm sure she and everyone else would think I did it on purpose to shame her but I did not. However I was not sorry for the scarlet color that now filled her face.
The reading was still happening when Madge came back through my doors with my very confused brother. "Your Majesty, Lord Rochford is here", she curtsied as he bowed. My ladies curtsied to my brother as I motioned for him to follow me.
"Keep sewing and reading ladies", I commanded. When George and I were behind the curtain in my bed chamber he rounded on me in a fierce whisper.
"What is the matter with you? Do you know how hard it is to move little Henry around court without anyone spotting us?"
With a voice equally fierce and low as his I responded, "Do you think I would have sent for you if it wasn't important? I've already dismissed my ladies once today. To do so again would only raise more suspicion and I cannot have the King spying on me before everything is accomplished. Most of my ladies are spies and if I have too many more whispered conversations behind these curtains we will be found out." He nodded with an apologetic face and I continued. "Where is little Henry anyway?"
"Suffering a most horrid fate. He's with our mother in her rooms. She keeps complaining about his country manners but I think the King will quite enjoy the boy. Anyway I told him that I would rescue him from his hell soon so what's the matter?"
Quickly I explained to him all that had taken place without him. I was glad for his quick understanding when he did not have to interrupt my story to follow it. "And so after receiving Mary-our sister's letter, I need you to go extend an invitation for Richmond to come to court. In doing so you help get little Henry away from prying eyes and you help us toward the ultimate goal."
George said nothing for a moment and then he spoke, "Do you not think that Henry will notice my absence? He'll most certainly notice Brandon's. Two of his council members absent without word and his wife behaving strangely? Henry will notice."
"Oh I'm sure he will. But...he won't be able to resist that blonde whore, and I plan to make her the center of attention. Of course I hope to take his attention myself but ,as is, I know that will only work for a short amount of time. I need him to forget that Brandon is not at his side, I need him to overlook that you haven't been seen around court, I need him to ignore my behavior. And as all of Europe knows the only way to completely distract Henry from getting what he wants is to wave something in his face that he wants even more...especially something he can't have. Besides you will both only be gone a night or two. I think I can distract him that long."
"Well Anne, you may have lost a lot of things but not your cunning. I'll go tell Mary that I'm taking little Henry and go prepare for the journey. I should be able to find our nephew suitable clothes in the city. I don't know what the Duke will say if I present his brother to him in his country clothes. At any rate, sweet sister, I hope to be back before the King misses me. If both of my sisters think it best to have Henry's children at court then who am I to disagree?"
With a kiss on my hand and an exaggerated bow George exited my chambers and went to his own. Not too much later Nan returned and instead of being suspicious she simply said, "Your Majesty, your letter to your aunt is being dispatched and the messenger has hope of bringing you a speedy reply".
"Thank you Nan. You may return to your sewing." She nodded and curtsied and took her place among my ladies. Brandon was leaving then, headed to Katherine. God bless his mission. I wanted nothing more than to go see Elizabeth but there was no way to do that now. I would just have to forgo a public dinner tonight for one in private. That way I could see Elizabeth without having to move little Anne around and without drawing too much attention. It would be a long afternoon.
"Mistress Seymour, go and tell the King that I will not be joining him for dinner and that I will dine alone. After that you may go and get ready for the feast. The rest of you may leave me now and go prepare as well." All of my ladies curtsied and left my chambers; all except two. "Nan, Madge I would like to thank you for your services to me for these past few days. I'm sure more will be needed in the following days but soon all this secrecy will stop and we will be able to go on as normal. I promise to reward you handsomely for this." They both smiled and assured me though it would be well received a reward wasn't necessary. I'd figure something out. I had them change me into one of my more basic dresses and we headed down to the nursery to see my daughter, after all, she was the reason I was doing all of this. I would do anything to secure my own heart.
Mistress Seymour looked absolutely appealing tonight. Were it not for her steadfast virtue I would lay her on a table and ravish her in front of everyone. When she came to me earlier I was a bit disappointed to learn that she came only to deliver Anne's message. It was that message, however, that lifted my spirits. I would love to be able to show friendship to Jane without feeling those piercing dark eyes boring into me. I was curious as to why Anne had decided to dine alone but I could discover that later. Tonight, I wanted to enjoy my Guinevere without interruption.
When the music started I watched the dancers couple up wondering if Jane would take the floor. When she didn't I sent a groom to tell the musicians to play one of my compositions. When I could hear the tune heading towards it's end I walked toward the Seymours seeking my angel.
"Your Majesty", they all said as they bowed and curtsied.
Waving them off I turned to her, "Lady Jane, if it pleases you, may I have the honor of the next dance?"
She blushed and smiled, a smile so bright it lit up my whole heart. "If it please Your Grace", her tiny voice said.
We took our places among the dancers and the music started. She never looked me in the eye and it made her all the more desirable. She was beautiful, kind, charitable, humble, and submissive. Nothing at all like my wife. Anne could learn to take some lessons from Mistress Seymour rather than make an enemy of her. Jane was dancing to my tune, overawed by my presence, enjoying herself at my court. I wanted nothing more than to posses her utterly and one day I would. But that would be a shame, to pluck a flower so pretty, with such a beautiful fragrance, from a garden just to throw it on the ground. No, I told myself. No, when I posses my dearest Jane it will not be to throw her away. If I cannot get a Prince from my wife then I'll give a crown to my Jane. As if she could hear my thoughts Jane's excited eyes shot up to my face and immediately fell to the floor, her face flamed, and her feet stumbled slightly. I chuckled lowly and she blushed a deeper crimson.
"There is no need to be embarrassed Mistress Seymour. You dance beautifully."
"Your Majesty is very kind. I know I dance like a country maiden."
I would have refuted her words immediately but the steps in the dance pulled us away from each other. I did not like that. Would that she had the confidence of Anne-I stopped that trail of thought immediately. Jane was almost everything I had ever wanted. She was beautiful, kind, religious, demure, and the people loved her. It was also clear that she would remember her place and stay out of the politics of England. She was not as witty as Anne or learned as Katherine but both of them had failed me. Jane would not. Jane would be everything and more. Unbidden to my mind I could hear the most dreaded whispered "if". If Anne did not give me a boy, if Jane could have a boy, if Anne would accept a divorce easier than Katherine did. I shook these dark thoughts from my head as Jane returned to me.
"Lady Jane you dance as gracefully as any Lady of the court. No country maiden ever looked so angelic."
"Thank you Your Majesty."
Her pale white skin flushed crimson and her eyes met the floor. I wanted a son more than a drowning man wanted air but there was part of me, though very small, that wanted Anne to fail in her duties. I loved her, of course I loved her, but Jane...Jane would tempt a saint. Her blonde hair, her milky skin, her calm demeanor, all of it was perfect.
"Kill the Queen", I heard her voice whisper. My eyes snapped to her face and I noticed she still had her head down. The intense dream I'd had at Wolf Hall came rushing back to my mind. I could feel the blood leaving my face as I remembered that night. "Kill the Queen. Kill the Boleyn whore." Whether or not Anne and I were on good terms did not matter-It was treason to even think that.
"Did you say something Mistress Seymour?"
"No Your Grace. I said nothing."
I nodded as the dance ended and everyone clapped. I nodded to Jane and returned to my seat. That dream had felt so real; I could feel the warmth of Jane's body, I could smell the country air on her skin, I could hear the pleasure in her voice, I could taste the lust coming off of her. How could that have been a dream? And such a stressful dream. That was not the Jane I knew and respected. That was not the Jane of my heart. The Jane I had dreamt of was ambition in woman's form. That was not who Jane was. If anything it was who Anne was. Perhaps too much thinking of Anne followed behind Jane was causing the problem. Yes, that had to be it. How silly I was not to notice before. That explained perfectly what was going on. Yes, yes surely my sleeping state had mixed the two women into one. That was why I was feeling the need to protect Anne from Jane. How silly. Jane was an angel and I would posses her utterly; whether Anne gave me a son or not-especially if she did not. I would have Jane Seymour after Anne or I would have nothing at all.
"Kill your Boleyn whore and we will have a son."
It was if Jane had screamed the words across the dining hall and yet I was the only one to hear them. I could feel the blood rush to face as my head snapped up to where I'd heard Jane's voice call. All I could see was her enveloped in the bosom of her family. As if sensing my my gaze her eyes met mine but as they took in my expression they widened and lowered as her face flushed the shade of Elizabeth's hair.
I looked away from her and took a long drink from my cup and rubbed my temples. I had to tell myself over and over again that it was just in my head. Despite that my heart would not slow it's pace and I was still quite furious. Enough of this I told myself as I leaned toward a groom.
"Boy go and fetch the Queen."
He jumped at the thunder in my voice and with lightening speed he left to obey my command. I expected Anne to take a moment to come into my presence as my summons was unexpected, but when my groom returned he did so alone.
"Your Majesty", he bowed. "The Queen's Grace was not in her rooms."
"Well where is she?"
"I do not know your Majesty."
"Go find out then!"
He again leapt at the tone of my voice and went to succeed in his mission.
Where was she?!
"Lady Bryan, I do apologize for so much secrecy but it will all be worth it in the end."
"Your Majesty it is not for me to complain. The Lady Anne has been no trouble at all and Her Royal Highness has quite thrived with another child in the nursery."
I smiled at that as I swayed my daughter in my arms. She was the very core of my existence. I remembered when I was younger and my sister was Mistress of the King, full-bellyed and uncomfortable. I remember being disgusted with how fat she had gotten and how tired she looked. Sh'ed been having a hard pregnancy her second time around.
"For God's sake go to sleep. Why do you toss and turn the whole time?" I said to Mary.
"Because I cannot get comfortable," she snapped back. "And if you cared more for me and less for yourself you would get me an extra pillow for my back, instead of lying there like a fat bolster."
I giggled at that as I got out of bed and lit a small fire. The flames cast an eerie glow on my sister's face. She was Mary Boleyn, Mistress of the King of England, beloved by him and her family; yet to look in her face all you could see was an uncomfortable pregnant woman who looked near faint.
"Are you really ill, or just making a fuss over nothing?"
"Really ill," she said. "Truly, Anne, I ache in every bone in my body."
"You're as white as a boggart," I said cheerfully. "You look old enough to be my mother."
"I am in pain," she said steadily. "Anne if you had ever carried a child you would know what this feels like. I swear to you it's no small matter."
"I can see that it is not," I said. "I only have to look at you to know that you feel like a woman of ninety years old. God knows how we will keep the king if this goes on."
Mary's entire pregnancy was a struggle for her. She was always tired and in pain; but in the end she had a boy. When she had an easy pregnancy, like I did, she had a girl, like I did. What a great fool I was in those days. A time when I had to watch my sister be the center of attention. All I understood in those times were advancement and ambition. I knew what it was to be so singularly focused on what I wanted most and to go get it. I knew what it was to crave more and more for myself without having a thought of anyone else in the world. And what skills I did not have in the trade of selfishness I was taught by the King. A man who cast off his wife and daughter for me, who executed his friends for me, who destroyed the religion of his country for me. All so I could give him a son.
"Somehow, I need to make him understand that this will be worth it. When I am his queen, and give him a son."
That seemed such a simple thing when I was younger. My grandmothers had both had sons. My mother had a son. My sister herself had a son for the King. Surely it would be very simple for me to do the same. If only I'd known about the stress of being a Queen. Perhaps I would not have been so overly confident about my fertility. Perhaps I would not have boasted about doing what Katherine of Aragon could not...No. Not even knowing the full weight of the crown would have calmed my ambitious soul. I was young, in love with the King, and I had everything to play for. Had I known that Elizabeth were to be my first born I would have perhaps been more cautious. Elizabeth meant everything to me. It was not her fault she was a girl. I resented her the moment I was told of her sex but that feeling faded away the moment I held her. Of course I loved her. How could I not? She was beautiful and healthy and mine. More than anything else she was mine. No matter what anyone said Elizabeth was my baby and I loved her more than my own heart. Looking down at her I remembered all the fuss over her birth. What a shock we all received when she was seen to be just a girl. We all, us Boleyns, and Howards, looked like fools but I did not care. My baby was what mattered.
My pains started at dawn and I had the midwife call Mary straightaway into the birthing chamber. She had to half-fight her way through courtiers and lawyers and clerks and officers of the court in the presence chamber outside the room. They had rigged up ropes on the bedposts and I was clinging onto them like a drowning woman. The sheets were already stained with blood, and the midwives were brewing a caudle on the fire. I was naked from the waist down, sweating and crying out with fear.
"She must rest," one of the midwives said to Mary. "She's fighting it."
My sister stepped up to the bed and waited. "Anne, rest," she said. "This is going to go on for hours."
"Thought you'd pay me a visit did you?" I said throwing back my hair.
"I came as soon as I was called. Do you want me to do anything for you?"
"I want you to do this for me," I said, my wit as sharp as ever.
She laughed. "Not I!"
I stretched a hand to her and she held it, I clung on. "God help me, I am in terror," I whispered.
"God will help you," she said. "You're having a Christian Prince aren't you? You're giving birth to a boy that is going to be the head of the church in England aren't you?"
"Don't leave me," I said. "I am ready to vomit with fear."
"Oh you'll vomit," she said cheerfully. "It gets an awful lot worse than this before it is better."
I was in labor for all of the day and then my pains grew faster and it was clear that the baby was coming.
"A girl," the midwife said, determinedly cheerful.
Mary held my full weight as I slumped with disappointment and I heard her whisper, "Oh God, no."
"A girl," I said in horror. "A girl. What good is a girl to us?"
Elizabeth's gender was the disappointment of my family but since the moment I held her I knew she was perfect. I knew I'd go to any length to protect her. I knew that meant reconciling myself with her sister, as well as her sister to their father. Looking down at her I felt a new sense of duty swell inside me. I knew no matter what it was my job to secure her place in life. As long as people still viewed me as a whore and Elizabeth a bastard I could do no such thing. Somehow I needed to convince Henry to do more for us-for all of us. Somehow I needed to make Henry secure the rights, wealth, and position of all five of his children. I walked away from Lady Bryan and looked into my arms at my beautiful daughter.
"Forgive me Elizabeth. I should have done better before your birth. I should have been better before your conception. I promise that I will give you a better future than you have now. I promise that no matter what you will be the greatest Queen the world has ever seen. I would lay down my life for you. I would do anything for you. But first you must have a little brother. I have to give your father a son. One day you will understand this."
I kissed her on her head and handed her back to Lady Bryan.
"I bid you goodnight Lady Bryan."
"Your Majesty," she lowered her head.
"Madge go and tell the cooks to send my dinner to me. And before you return make sure that the Lady Mary is comfortable and has all that she needs."
"Madam."
"Come Nan and let us prepare for our meal and then bed."
"You clearly have never done this before," I heard the Lady Mary's voice call out.
"I would've thought that evident from me saying I've never done this before sist-my lady." Catherine's voice sounded unbothered and disinterested.
"Are you always this impudent?" Mary's voice was filled with humor and incredulity.
"I apologize Madam. I hate being unable to do something; and I hate even more having witnesses to it."
"You and I both sister. I shall take pity on you and help if you'll let me." There was a slight pause before I heard shuffling and the Lady Mary's voice again. "The stitching is very simple you see..."
Their voices faded to the back of my mind as I thought about my Henry and little Anne. God only knew what my son was enduring. George had stopped by rather briefly to tell me that he was taking my boy from the court.
"No! Absolutely not, I forbid it!" I screamed.
"Mary-"
"No George! At every turn this family has taken my son from me and used him for their own purposes. I will not have this start again!"
"Need I remind you dear sister that this was your idea," George's voice sneered. "And I mean all of it. You decided not to have your children away from you and to have them placed at court. You decided that it was necessary for Richmond to come to court as soon as he possibly could. So when Anne decided I had to go retrieve him it looked like a good way for Henry to help his family. He is after all Richmond's brother. Besides," his voice had become teasing, " 'tis is either this or leaving him with mother all day."
Despite how badly I wanted Henry at court there was no way I could condemn him to that particular hell and he'd never forgive me if I did. So with a heavy heart I kissed my baby boy goodbye and watched him leave with George praying he would be safe. The pain of having him away from me was intensified by having Annie away in the nursery. My baby girl was so close to me but she could be in Rome for all the good it did me. I knew that she was in the best nursery England had to offer; her lodgings were even better than mine but that did not help the sharp pain in my chest.
"Lady Stafford", I heard from beside me.
"Yes?" I turned to see another maid looking at me with wide eyes.
"Are you well? You're crying."
I wiped my eyes. "I'm fine. Did you need something?"
"Lady Sheldon is here."
I walked to the front of the apartments to see the Lady Mary looking none to pleased at Madge.
"Cousin," I greeted her. "What brings you here?"
"Her Majesty has sent me here to make sure that you all have everything that you require."
"You may tell Mistress Anne that if she desires to make my station more comfortable she will leave the court and see my mother restored to her rightful position." The Lady Mary's voice was filled with conviction and defiance; a tone I was all too familiar with.
"You may tell my sister that we have all that we need here and bid her goodnight", I said.
Madge nodded to me, curtsied to the Lady Mary, and went on her way.
The Lady Mary snapped toward me and glared, "You do not speak for me! You do not answer for me! I meant what I said to your whore of a sister. If she does not like it then she should leave England for all of the country shares in my sentiments."
"Not all", I said.
"What?"
"Not. All. Not all of the country shares in your sentiments. There are those who delight in seeing my sister on the throne, and there are those that simply delight in seeing your mother off of it."
"Those who think that way are liars and heretics who will spend an eternity in hell."
"Are they? Do you condemn your father to hell then?"
The Lady Mary hesitated for a second before answering. "My father has simply been led astray. Soon he will remember the true faith and he will return to my mother. You'll see."
"He will not. I have already told you he will not. I assure you that whether or not my sister is Queen, your mother will never return to her former glory. While there is hope of a son my sister is safe. So if you want to keep your father's love I advise you to manage your temper. The whole court will say be saying what I have been saying now. If you have hope of being a Princess again then learn to hold your tongue; manage your Tudor and Spanish temper, and learn to smile at your enemies. If you and Anne weren't so determined to dislike each other you two would make great friends for you seem to need the same lessons. Bide your time Mary. You don't have enough power to make demands, but one day you will. One day you will have glory, power, and riches. You will have everything you ever lost-your father's love will be restored and renewed. But you must learn to wait sweet child. Wait in patience for your moment. I cannot promise you this throne but I assure you that my sister and I will do all we can to make you a Princess again. Pray, weep, cry out if you must but do not let your enemies upset you child. Do not let them see you so upset. Learn to mask your true feelings. Mask them so well that you're not even sure yourself what you feel. When the moment is right you will be in a position to bring down your enemies and you will be able to choose whether to do so or not."
As she stood there I could see understanding enter her eyes. Suddenly an idea struck me as I went and grabbed a cloak. "Think of what I told you Lady Mary. I will return soon enough to see you both to bed."
"Where do you go mother?" Catherine called out.
"To see your sister."
"Uncle George what exactly is an inn?" My nephew looked around the rooms in wonder.
"It is a place travelers go to in order to rest overnight."
"How come we didn't just stay with one of your friends?"
"Because we are travelling in secret."
"How come?"
"Because we're helping the Queen."
"Why?"
"Because she's family and she needs our help."
"But whyyyy? Everyone keeps telling me she needs help. That she needs help because of the King but no one will tell me why!"
"Hush boy!" I walked to the door and opened it, checking to see if anyone was near. If word got out that George Boleyn was overheard explaining the Queen's peril, the rumors would spread like the plague. I addressed him again in lower tones. "Hush. You must learn to act as a gentleman. Gentlemen don't whine. Now sit up and I'll explain it to you." I waited for him to wiggle into proper posture before I continued. "You understand that your aunt is Queen of England do you not?"
"Yes sir."
"You understand how that came to be?"
"Of course sir. King Henry realized that Queen- the Princess Dowager could not possibly be his wife cuz of the words of the Bible. He did not want to anger God so he 'nulled his marriage to her and married my aunt because he loved her." He said in one breath.
"Good. Now that you know the public story it's time you learned the true one."
"What d'ya mean Uncle George?"
"The truth boy. If I tell you this story you must swear to speak of it with no one but family. I mean it. You must promise me."
"I swear Uncle George."
"Good boy. King Henry has never been a very faithful husband; he has always had a mistress. When she was in the Princess Dowager's household, your mother caught the King's eye and became his mistress; and of course in the time she birthed you and your sister. Now, after the King's affection for your mother waned, we needed another Howard girl to take her place but before we could find one your aunt Anne caught his eye. She got him to fall in love with her and he wanted to make her Queen. Rather he wanted a son and he was in love with a young girl. Queen Katherine was barren. The obvious solution was to divorce Katherine and marry Anne. The Pope would not give the King a divorce and Anne had already began sharing reformer ideas with the King. Having Anne in one ear, Cromwell in another, and no chance of a son in his current marriage, he left the Catholic Church and had his marriage dissolved." I stopped for a moment and let my nephew digest it for a moment.
"I still don't see how come we have to help Aunt Anne."
"Why. You don't see why we have to help your Aunt Anne." He nodded and I continued in a whisper. "We have to help her because she still doesn't have a son and the King is losing interest in her. More than anything your Aunt must have a son."
"But aren't I the King's son?" His voice perked up a little.
"You indeed are little Henry; were you not, the Boleyn's might not have a fortune to speak of. But let me assure you that if you say that in front of anyone who isn't a Boleyn, someone will die for treason." I hated frightening my nephew but his wide eyes and sudden intake of breath assured me that my point was taken. "If we could put you on the throne, you'd be a Prince already, I assure you. At one point it was our intention, but that did work."
"So how are we gonna-", I raised my eyebrow at him. "How are we supposed to help Aunt Anne have a son? Are we gooiinng to give her one?" He said trying to please me with proper, though exaggerated, speech.
"No. We are not going to give your Aunt a son. We are going to make sure that the King tolerates her until she gives him one. If we're lucky he'll even love her again. Now, no more questions til morning. I'll have the maids draw you a bath and I need to make sure the clothes I've found for you fit."
I had gotten down the paths to the nursery unseen and unheard, and the guards had let me through after I removed my hood. I was so close to my baby I could feel her. I made little work of the doors that stood between me and my baby. She was sleeping very peacefully next to the Princess; I smiled at my niece and cradled my daughter to my chest. "I've missed you sweet girl", I whispered to her. After a moment in our dream-like solitude I heard a rather loud yelp of surprise.
"Who are you and what are you doing in the Princess Elizabeth's nurs-", Lady Bryan trailed off as I turned towards her.
"I am the Lady Mary Stafford, sister to the Queen of England, aunt of-", she waved me off, irritated by my small speech.
"Why did you not tell me you were here? You've given me quite a fright madam."
"I'm sorry. I know when we and the Queen spoke we all agreed that I would have to go without her for awhile but...I had to see her."
"I understand, but the next time you sneak into the nursery, inform me please", her serious tone turned friendly and she left us alone.
For awhile I stared down at her, re-memorizing her face and all her little details. At some point Elizabeth cried and Lady Bryan was immediately there; but my baby didn't stir. She remained deeply asleep and after awhile I drifted as well. I didn't wake up until I heard a voice.
"What in God's name are you doing here?"
"Your Majesty?" Nan's voice was concerned.
"Yes Nan."
"The King's groom is here."
"And?"
"The King has requested your attendance in the dining hall."
I was shocked. Why? What did he want? Had he found out about the Lady Mary...s? Had he been to the nursery? What secrets had he uncovered?
"Madam?", Nan interrupted my panic. "What shall I tell him?"
Thinking, I said the safest response I could manage. "Tell His Majesty that I apologize but I have just sat down to take my own dinner and that I hope he understands." As Nan bowed and left I began to eat my meal without tasting it. I could feel Madge staring at me from her position along the wall but I could not focus on her. What did he know? I couldn't help the panic that washed over me. What did Henry know? Did he know that I'd sent George and Charles away? Did he know that Mary had come back to court him? Did he know his kids with Mary were here? Did he know the Lady Mary, his cast off daughter was here...at court...where she was forbidden? Had he been to the nursery? Perhaps the Lady Bryan couldn't hide Annie quick enough and she told it all. Or maybe a guard couldn't keep the secret. What if they had Seymour gold in their pockets? Maybe they were spies for the Seymours-no. Elizabeth's guards were always with her...at Hatfield. It wouldn't benefit the Seymours to pay her guards to spy. After all what great secrets could a babe hold? Are they discussing how often she has to have her cloths changed? How scandalous! I smiled to myself...But the Seymours are careful about everything. They could have Elizabeth's guards in their pockets. I hadn't even noticed Nan had returned until I saw her walking back out again. When she came back into the room her voice wavered slightly.
"Your Grace, The King insists upon your presence, immediately." When I turned to her I could see Henry's nervous groom standing at the door.
"If His Majesty commands it, who are we to refuse? Nan, Madge, help me change."
"My Queen I beseech you, please," the grooms panicked voice rang out. "His Majesty was most insistent and I fear us both if you do not come immediately."
I'd never had a servant be so bold, especially not a male servant. No groom would've dared to tell Katherine of Aragon to retract her orders to her ladies and to go unto the King immediately. Not Cromwell in his most confident state, not Wolsey on his most prideful day, no one. Before I could respond to him, Nan whispered to me.
"My Lady, perhaps it is best you go now. All the planning that you are doing will be wasted if the King continues to grow displeased with you. Besides, it might help you to have on a plainer dress than one of your rich ones."
"How?"
"Well if the King wanted elaborate..."
"He wouldn't be courting that Seymour...girl," I said finishing her thought.
She nodded, "It might also help the people see you as less of-as more humble."
I considered this for a moment; I could play the affronted Queen or I could take advice from my most faithful servant. "Well then ladies, let us go unto the King."
The journey from my rooms to my husband's presence wasn't a very long one but each step felt like an eternity. I could not help but fear for myself as I listened to the sound of heels echoing along the halls; the closer we got to the dining hall the quieter those echoes became, and the louder my heart got. I paused for a moment to collect myself, pinched my cheeks to give them color, took a deep breath, and walked into the dining hall.
"Her Majesty, the Queen!"
As I walked into a hall of surprised courtiers, all music, dancing, and talking stopped. There were a few "Madams, My ladies, and Your Graces" whispered as I walked by but for the most part there was only quietness. My walk was as confident as it had ever been; one would think I was walking to greet my lover who could not bare to be separated from me, rather than walking to answer the summons of my visibly angry husband. Before I could get up to him I was taken aback when Thomas Seymour stepped up to me, still bowed, grabbed my hand and kissed it.
"My Lady," he said grinning.
I tensed at the feel of his hand on mind; every nerve in my body protested against the unfamiliar gesture. How dare he?! He was the brother of that whore and-before I could think too far I looked upon him with the mask of a Queen and flashed a courtier smile at him.
"Lord Seymour. Must you always be so bold?" My light and chiding tone caused him and other members of the court to laugh.
"Indeed Madam. For if I was serious all the time, who would be able to tell me from Edward?" The court and I chuckled at that. "Besides history remembers the bold," he said confidently.
"History remembers those who win. Do you know how History truly remembers the bold?"
"How Madam?"
"History remembers the bold as traitors. The bold are those who go against their Kings and their rightful Queens and end up a head shorter. So let us both hope that history remembers us as victors, lest our heads decorate the Tower."
"Your Grace", he said and stood back out of my path; for once that stupid grin of his was nowhere to be seen.
It didn't take long after that to get in front of my husband; thinking back on Nan's words about being humble I immediately sank into a graceful curtsy.
"My King," I whispered in a low voice.
"Rise Ladies," came his curt reply. Nan, Madge, and I all rose and I looked toward my husband. He nodded for his court to rise and for the music to continue. With the ease of a seasoned court, the musicians picked up where they left off and so did the conversations. I waited for Henry to invite me to sit and when he did not I decided to push this summons along.
"You summoned me, Your Majesty?"
"I did."
"How may I serve you?" He raised an eye at that.
"How may you serve me?" His tone sounded incredulous and disbelieving; instead of snapping at him I simply nodded. The noise of the court assured me that, though I was certain everyone was watching, at the very least pretenses were being kept. Conversations still continued, dances still began and ended, and songs were constantly being played. My husband stared at me and I stared back meeting his gaze head on. I was not that Seymour bitch. I was not quick to embarrassment or humiliation; I was the Queen. After another long moment and a long draw on his cup he finally spoke.
"Where were you earlier?" His tone was possessive and accusatory.
"When Your Grace?"
"When I sent my groom to your rooms earlier this evening you weren't there. Why weren't you there?"
"I was visiting the Princess."
"The Princess." He sneered the title as though it caused him some offence. I immediately bridled under that.
"Yes. The Princess. Our daughter. It is my right as her mother and her Queen to see her when I desire. I desired to see her so I went to her."
His face immediately darkened and there was a part of me that whispered for me to rein in my temper. "Watch your tone madam. Or have you forgotten that it takes more than one birth, especially that of a girl, to call yourself Queen?"
"I seem to remember a rather large and elaborate ceremony involving the Archbishop, the entire court, and you that made me Queen. Or have you forgotten that you placed a golden crown, St. Edward's crown, on my head and named me the Queen of this realm?"
"You go too far Madam. I have made you a Queen and-"
"Yes yes yes and you can drag me back down. But if you are entertaining thoughts of a legitimate son within a year, then you too have to be involved in the making of him."
He said nothing but the wine swimming in his eyes screamed at me, insulted me, spat at me...provoked me.
"Or do you think that since you are made head of the church of England you too share the power of immaculate conception?"
"Were I looking for a virginal vessel to put my seed, as the King, don't you think I could do better than a prideful upstart from Kent?"
"I'm not sure Your Majesty. Does a mousy upstart from Wolfhall qualify as better?" I knew immediately I'd gone too far. I knew in that moment that I'd pay for that. Whether or not I had meant to get into a fight with Henry was besides the point, I had insulted that blonde simpleton and that was enough for him. Realizing that there was nothing left to say to him I took my leave. "Your Majesty will forgive me but I am no longer well enough to stay in such company. You will forgive me I'm sure. Come ladies let us prepare for bed." We bowed to him and made a graceful exit from the hall. How dare he?! Didn't he know I loved him more than any woman ever could? It wasn't enough though; my love, Elizabeth, we weren't enough for him. Elizabeth had to have a brother; my baby girl would have to have her position usurped and I would have to provide the usurper. When we arrived at my rooms I headed toward the door and stopped. I would see my baby girl one more time tonight. If for no other reason than to reassure myself that she was safe; and she was. She was also alone in her cradle. Where was Annie? Holding Elizabeth I walked further into the nursery and saw Mary sleeping in a chair with Annie on her chest. Before I could contain my anger I blurted out, "What in God's name are you doing here?" Mary stirred and looked about herself.
"Anne?"
"Mary."
"What time is it?"
"Late. What are you doing in here?" My tone was impatient.
"I imagine the same thing you are. I wanted to see my daughter," her low voice responded.
"You aren't supposed to be in here. What if someone came in here," I fiercely whispered.
"Who besides me or you would come to the nursery?"
I wanted to say Henry might visit but I didn't have the energy to lie about that.
"Mary, this is court you can never be sure who may or may not come to the nursery."
"Do you really think Henry could make it in the nursery without causing a fuss? Lady Bryan or I would have plenty of time to hide Annie, and myself, before he could make it this far. Calm down Anne."
"I'm sorry. I've just had another argument with him."
"Well sit and tell me all about it."
I went over what happened with her. Everything from the groom's beseeching request to my insult of Jane. Before she could respond there was commotion at the door.
"Is the Queen here?!" I quickly turned to Mary who, with wide eyes, tightly grabbed baby Anne and moved further into the rooms, closing a curtain behind her. With Elizabeth still in my arms I sat back down and tried to appear outwardly calm even if it was anything but the truth. I could hear Henry's footsteps coming closer to us and soon I could see his shadow framing the middle of the doorway.
"How can I help Your Grace?" I said without looking up.
"You think your behavior was appropriate Madam?"
"Your Grace?"
"I called you to me for fear of your safety and all you can do is cause a fight in front of my entire court."
"I did no such thing. All I did was respond to you and your tone."
"You do not challenge me. I am the King of England. NOT YOU!" His shouting startled Elizabeth and she immediately began crying. I didn't have the patience for Henry's fit; my baby needed me.
"When you are ready to behave as a man and a King I will be ready to treat you as one, Henry. Til then perhaps your place should be here in the nursery. It seems a more befitting place for your behavior."
"Were it not for the fact that you had my daughter in your hands I'd show you just how much of a man I was." Were I a reasonable woman his words would have scared me or at least unsettled me but they did not. Were I a reasonable woman I would've taken his words for the threat they were and not the challenge I interpreted. Not one to back down from a threat or a challenge I called Lady Bryan and handed Elizabeth over to her. When they were both out of sight I turned to Henry.
"Now I am holding nothing. How much of a man are you Hen-", before I could finish his mouth was on mine and he had slammed me against a wall. With equal passion my lips met his and I reached for the strings of his breeches as he began rolling up my dress. There was a part of me that knew Mary and Annie were near enough to hear our passions but I could not stop Henry. For one I did not want to but also there was no guarantee that if I stopped him that we would continue. So I let him enter me without hesitation. We made love to each other, neither of us giving in or bending to the other. We went until his seed was inside me and the two of us could hardly breathe. Henry's breath was hot against my neck as I rested my head against the wall that was keeping us up. As he backed away and removed himself from inside me he kissed me on the lips and fixed his clothes.
"That's the kind of man I am Anne, you'd be wise not to forget it."
"If that's the way you intend to show me, I'll be forgetting again very soon", I said seductively. For a moment he looked at me with disbelief before he shook his head and smiled.
"Goodnight Anne."
"Goodnight sweet Prince."
Before the door to the nursery was shut Nan and Madge came in to fix my gown and straighten my hair. Mary came back into the room cradling a now awake Annie.
"I'll stay a little while longer to put her back to bed and then I'll leave. Tonight was too close, you were right after all."
"I promise Mary, you will be introduced back into court as soon as possible and the need to sneak will be dispensed with. Goodnight sister."
"Goodnight Your Majesty. Let us pray that His Majesty's efforts take fruit."
"Amen."
I would never admit it out loud but I was nervous as my nephew and I approached Richmond's rooms. We had already been welcomed into his palace and his groom was now leading my nephew and I into his apartments.
"Wait here My Lord and I will tell the Duke you are ready for your audience." When the groom had left I turned to my nephew one last time.
"This is the Duke of Richmond. Other than the King-", my nephew cut me off.
"He is the most important man in the Kingdom for one day he may become King in his own right. I am to bow to him, stand up straight, and to keep quiet. I know Uncle George." I stood and smiled at him. I had told him after his bath the previous night and this morning while we were dressing the exact same thing. As I stood back up the groom came back out.
"His Grace will see you now."
As we entered I took a deep breath and put on my best courtier's smile. I bowed and prayed that the quick lesson I had given my nephew on the act proved to be sufficient.
"Your Grace", we said as one.
"Lord Rochford. To what do I owe the privilege of your presence?"
"I have come to ask you to court."
"His Majesty sends you to invite me to court?"
"Nnno. The Queen does, Your Grace."
"What reason would your sister have to invite me to court? She and I have never mixed words before."
"That is why she desires to invite you to court. She feels it has been too long since you have seen your father and she would like to have a relationship with you."
"Why?"
"Your Grace?"
"Why does she want a relationship with me?"
"Because you are His Majesty's son and therefore her step son."
"So? My Lord Rochford, you must forgive me, but surely you see how this must look. Your sister, the Queen, who has been with my father for just about ten years, though they've only been married three, decides to invite me to court only when it is rumored that her position as Queen is no longer certain."
I looked at him pointedly at that. "Though you be the King's son, you are dangerously close to treason."
"I only speak of rumors, My Lord. I do not mean to offend, but everything else is I have said is the truth. Why does your sister take a sudden interest in me?"
"My sister is taking an interest in all of His Majesty's children as of late."
"All? You mean Elizabeth and I? Or is Mary no longer considered the King's child since she is labeled bastard as I am, and as Elizabeth sometimes is whispered to be."
For a moment I allowed myself to look smug as I smiled at him. "Mary is at court."
He hesitated, "She's what?"
"The Lady Mary is attending court, in secret, but she is there in her own chambers."
"My father allowed her back?"
"No. My sister did. The King does not know she's there."
There was a moment of silence as he thought about that.
"My sister is back at court because your sister invited here there? No."
"Indeed Your Grace. She is of course secreted there but she is at court in her own chambers, with her own maids."
"What Boleyn game is this?"
"The most serious game there is. Life or death. We Howards and Boleyns tend to enjoy living, especially the lives we've built for ourselves."
"You mean the one your sister has built for you."
"If we're being fair it's the life both of my sisters have given us."
"The Queen is the only one of note."
"That isn't entirely true. After all Mary did the exact same thing your mother did. She gave the King a son."
"It was never accepted that her bastard belonged to the King."
I chuckled at that. One only needed to see the King to know my nephew was his. "Well perhaps it has been too long since you've seen your father. Perhaps you no longer remember what he looks like."
"I remember my father's image as well as I remember my own."
"Then look into my nephew's face," I stood back and pointed to little Henry, "and see if your father's image is not reflected there."
When Fitzroy looked to the boy his expression immediately changed. It was evident that he saw what everyone else did, a boy to be the very image of his father.
"Does it need to be accepted to be the truth? Do you yet doubt that Henry Carey, son of Mary Boleyn, nephew of Anne Boleyn, is the son of the King?"
He silently shook his head. "He is the image of my father reflected. Does that mean the girl, his sister is-"
"The King's daughter? She is. She does not resemble him as much as little Henry does but her attitude is more Tudor than Boleyn. I leave it to God to decide whether that be a good thing or bad."
"All."
"Your Grace?"
"You said all. That Her Majesty was taking an interest in all of His Majesty's children, meaning Elizabeth, Mary, myself, and your niece and nephew." I nodded and he was quiet a moment as he turned away from us and looked out of a window. "Where is your niece now that your nephew is here?"
"She is at court secreted with her mother and tending to the Lady Mary."
"I cannot believe that my sister would so easily ally herself with anyone who was an enemy to her mother, especially your sister. More so I cannot believe that your sister has allowed her back to court without signing the oath."
"Oh it is not with ease. Mary continues to rally against my sister but it will do her little good. Whether she does it easily or not my sister will recommend the Lady Mary to the King. As for the oath...that is between their Majesties. But no matter what, Anne will make it her concern to surround His Majesty with his family. "
"Why? So he can forget that she still hasn't provided him with a son?"
"No so that when she does provide him with a son, you nor your sister will be a threat to his claim. Like it or not there will be a Boleyn King when all this is done. One way or another."
"Now who's getting close to treason?"rt
"Is it treason to say the Queen will give the King sons? I come to extend you an invitation from the Queen, that is all. I did not come here to quarrel nor to insult you."
"When would Her Majesty present the King's children to him?"
"The King's companions Anthony Knivert and William Compton are expected back to court soon. Her Majesty would present our sister and her children, as well as you at the audience when they return."
"In the meantime what are we meant to do at court?"
"Stay a secret."
"I shall consider your offer My Lord. As for now I think our meeting has come to an end. You and your nephew our welcome to stay in my palace until I have given my decision. My Lord." He nodded his head as left through the doors and his groom came in to see us to our chambers.
"Uncle George," Henry whispered when were left alone. "He does'na like us."
"No," I said grunting from the effort of removing my boots, "he does not."
"Why?"
"Don't trouble yourself over it boy."
"But he's my brother. We're s'pose to like each other."
"In due time little Henry. He will come to see reason, one way or another. He doesn't have a choice. For now though, we must wait and see if the King's oldest son is with or against. With or without him though, we will save your aunt."
A/N: Sweet Lord this took a chunk of my life. Now this was/is a LONG read. It probably won't happen again. As for the future, due to some editing, I'm already a couple of scenes into the next chapter, which will be my usual length. So I sincerely hope you enjoyed, until next time :).
Oh and the scenes about Mary's pregnancy and Elizabeth's birth/Anne's delivery are from the Other Boleyn Girl book. And the quote by Anne that it will all be worth it when she gives Henry a son is from the Other Boleyn Girl movie.