Clarke knocked on the door, her heart beating out of her chest. She had nowhere else to go, no one left to turn to though she wouldn't trade him for the world.

The door opened and the young girl that answered the door looked confused though Clarke would recognize her anywhere. "Clarke? What?"

Octavia Blake was fifteen when Clarke last saw her, almost four years ago when she left Arkadia. She's gorgeous and Clarke realized how large the impact of her leaving had. She was Bellamy's friend but she'd became Octavia's confidante and Clarke left her behind without so much as a goodbye which definitely wasn't good for Octavia's already fragile psyche, thanks to her mother.

"Is—is he here?" Clarke's voice broke, the events of the last twenty-four hours beginning to get to her.

"No, he's—he's at the high school. Teaches history now."

Clarke nodded and turned to the road to drive to him.

"Clarke, what's going on?" Octavia asked concerned.

"I'm so sorry I left, O. You deserve better than me."

"Why are you here?"

"I need Bellamy."

"He needed you four years ago and you abandoned him!"

"I have to go."

"Don't you dare get him fired. He's finally okay without you," she called after Clarke as she walked back to her car. "You know he deserves that job!"

Clarke got in the car, she knew Octavia was right, but she also wouldn't feel safe without him. She has to see him.

Once she was at the high school, Clarke snuck in through the gym like she used to with Finn before—before Raven. She walked through the halls of nostalgia, so many smiles, so many tears, another reason she left.

She walked the halls and peeked into classrooms and "…left for exile, replaced by Publius Valerius Publicola. That's a loaded name, keep him in your thoughts, but don't get used to him. King Tarquin's reign is long from over."

Clarke looked into the room the deep voice boomed from and her erratic heart calmed. Bellamy was so in his element, looking like one of the Gods he always read about. He turned to write on the board, his eyes caught on her and he froze. Licking his lips he shook his head.

She stepped forward, into the classroom, feeling every eye on her before she closed the gap between them, her arms flung around his neck. "I lied to you," her words unsteady.

"I know," Bellamy pulled away, cupping her face.

Clarke shook her head, "I wasn't safe, I—I need you."

"Go to my house, I'll leave right after the last bell."

"I angered someone. I don't want to be alone."

"Kane is principal, go to him. He'll protect you until I'm done for the day."

"My… He'll tell her," Clarke shook her head frantically.

"Princess, I am losing their attention. I now have fifteen minutes to teach them a half hours' worth of Roman history. Take my desk, you can stay here."

"Thank you, Bell," Clarke grimaced, stepping away from him. She moved further into the room, closer to the windows. She feared for her life, knew Bellamy would protect her. How could she deny him her heart?

She listened to his lesson, his passion shining through and within minutes, her fingers itched to draw. She—she hadn't had the urge since she'd left.

She pulled a sheet of paper from the printer behind her and grabbed the red pen, not caring of mistakes, just needing to draw again.

The bell rang, jolting her from her drawing. Octavia.

"Chapters twelve and thirteen are your homework tonight. You know the questions and bonus still stand!" Bellamy called as his students noisily packed up their books.

"Mr. Blake, is she your girlfriend?" a boy called.

"A dear friend," Bellamy smiled at Clarke.

Clarke knew the students were skeptical, she would have been too if one of her teachers had a strange visitor that had a sketchy hushed conversation in the middle of class and then stuck around looking scared as hell.

"What happened?" he asked once his classroom was empty.

"Don't you have another class?"

"Freshmen, horrible time management skills, the one class I close my door at final bell. Did someone hurt you? You haven't texted me in six weeks, I was about to drive up and check on you."

"That was the point, Bell. I needed you to come get me. I—I couldn't do it myself. Anya came back, she gave me the out I needed."

"What happened?"

"It started innocent, nothing bad. He just watched, always left a large tip. Then asked for a dance, it was weird, but Roan said not to worry. Then he touched me, held my hips. I told Roan after the second time and he reminded the guy of the rules. He backed off for a week and came back with a vengeance. He—he was choking me, Bell." She watched his eyes dart down to her throat. "Make up, Roan kept a close eye and caught him. Told Derek, the security guard, that he's banned. He hung out back a few times waiting for me. He followed me home the other night so I—I stayed with Niylah last night before leaving this morning."

"You should have called me the second he put his hands on you. Hell, I should have forced you to come back to me last year!" he exclaimed, he can be angry. He should be.

"Bell—"

"I know, you would've left again. I would have made it worse."

Clarke smiled, how did she possibly stay away from him for so long? How could she shove down the hold he has on her? She loved Lexa, it was consuming and exactly what she needed, but Lexa tried turning her into someone she isn't, someone like Costia. Clarke couldn't be what Lexa needed so they broke up. Niylah wanted more than Clarke could give her after Lexa. Clarke still wasn't over the breakup but Bellamy made losing Finn easier, he can do it again, help her love again. Love him, the one that's always been there for her, the one she can't bear to lose.

Bang! They jolted apart, Bellamy nearly fell over, catching his elbow on the edge of his desk. His eyes caught on the drawing of Octavia. "Red isn't really her color."

Clarke smirked, "You got another color?"

"I'm a teacher, I have every pen color."

"Pink?"

Bellamy scoffed, "My desk is yours, just don't look in my folders or grade book, I don't need FERPA on my ass."

"Go teach, loser," Clarke chuckled, she missed this.

He rolled his eyes as the bell rang and he crossed the room to close the door. Clarke noticed six empty chairs, knowing she'll hear a pounding on the door in thirty seconds.

"Mr. Blake!" an eager girl in the first row called, shaking her raised hand avidly and Clarke smirked, Bellamy made fun of her for doing that in their chemistry class.

"Yes, Aylee?"

"If Benedict Arnold was trying to protect his family, why—"

"Parents will do anything to protect their children, even betray their cause and best friend," Clarke said before cringing, she didn't mean to.

Bellamy smirked, "Class, this is Miss Griffin, she's supposed to be observing today, but can't seem to control herself. Just like in Mr. Green's chemistry class."

"Please! It's not like you actually knew the answers."

"Not the point."

"I'm shutting up now, Grumpy. Teach your students."

"Mm," Bellamy hummed, Clarke saw the fire burning behind his eyes, just as they did when she said goodbye four years ago and she wondered if he was going to kiss her.

She still wonders that, but also how many of his students have a crush on him. She looked around and saw three ogling him and smiled, definitely seeing what they saw in him.

Clarke shook the thought out of her head, finding a black pen in his drawer, fixing her drawing of Octavia, happy that Bellamy allowed her to stay.

Saying that Bellamy soothed and calmed Clarke doesn't do him any justice. That he makes her feel safe, doesn't either because he ignites a fire within her. Clarke's intelligence rivaled Bellamy's, igniting arguments that lasted hours due to their stubbornness and need to be correct. To be the last one standing. Half the time they were over the most ridiculous things, those were the ones that worked Clarke up the most. The frivolity of the argument. Half the time she'd go home and get herself off and over the edge, her best orgasms caused by him. Not that she could ever tell him that. That's not how he wants to be with her.

Clarke walked into the house with her purse in hand, Bellamy insisted on carrying her duffel bag with all her things crammed inside, into the house himself. Again, being Clarke's knight. Not that she thought herself a princess, she couldn't, that's Bellamy's thing. She can save herself physically, she had the guy off her before Roan entered the room, but emotionally Clarke was a train wreck.

"So you can take my room until I clean out my mom's room, you can have that once that's done."

"You're the one who'll be working. Keep your bed, I got the couch."

"I'm not letting you sleep on my lumpy couch."

"You just made my point for me, you're not sleeping on a lumpy couch tonight and then spending all day tomorrow standing in front of a classroom teaching teenagers with absolutely no boundaries wondering why you're walking funny with a newly slipped disc. You really want them thinking you had a rigorous night of debauchery with your friend?"

"Remind me again why you dropped out of pre med," Bellamy said, avoiding the insinuation.

Clarke looked away, embarrassed of her ignored insinuation while she blinked the memory of fixing Roan's back after falling asleep on the couch in his office too many times. "I just know what can happen."

"Still don't talk about it?"

"I don't think about it, Bellamy. It's too much."

He nodded, he remembered, held her that night and said goodbye the morning after. "I'm here when you're ready."

Clarke nodded, "Where's O?"

"Probably Lincoln's," he said casually. One does not speak casually about their nineteen year old sister and former room advisor who's twenty eight.

"RA Lincoln?" Clarke grimaced.

"Don't. it's happening and I don't want to think about it."

Clarke's grimace was nearly permanent with the thousand questions flowing through her brain but she knew not to push Bellamy on the topic of Octavia. "She told me where to find you."

"I should have told you that I worked at the high school, just in case. You okay with her knowing you're here?"

"She'd have found out anyway," she shrugged.

"Yeah, but she can tell someone."

"They'll find out too. It's okay, Bell."

He nodded, Clarke knew he was worried about the man finding her. She was too but she still had Bellamy.

"Would you mind if I took a shower? I'm feeling gross after the drive."

"Of course, everything should be in there for you. The blue towel on the rack is yours."

Clarke smiled, somethings haven't changed, "I remember."

"I'll start on dinner."

Clarke took the duffel bag from Bellamy, taking it to the bathroom down the hallway. Once in the shower she scrubbed her skin and scalp until she couldn't feel the man's hands any longer, knowing the feeling would be back in the morning.

She refused to look in the mirror, refused to acknowledge the ugly bruises wrapped around her throat and the one on the side of her eye where he'd slapped her, his ring causing the damage.

Sifting through the duffel bag, Clarke realized she had grabbed all her dirty laundry, and nothing that she could exactly wear in mixed company. She was either home or working at the club so layers weren't exactly important.

Clarke found a clean pair of grey boy shorts and pulled them up over her thighs before grabbing the least wrinkled shirt she found, a white tank top, to throw on to go ask Bellamy if she could borrow sweats until she does laundry.

Stepping out of the bathroom, Clarke's nostrils came into contact with a scent she spent years dreaming about. She turned the corner leading to the kitchen, finding Bellamy's back to her at the stove as he stirred the creamy sauce. She walked over to him and hugged him, his body tensed at the sudden touch before relaxing. "Thank you," she said.

"It's your favorite, right? With mushrooms."

"Yes, but I meant for everything."

"Look me in the eye when you answer my next question."

Clarke took a step back, her arms falling to her sides and he turned around, worry suddenly taking over his features. "Oh, my God, Clarke!" She knew he wanted to touch the bruises but held back and Clarke was appreciative, she didn't want to remember what happened to her, especially not with Bellamy's hands.

"I'm fine. You have a question."

The muscle in Bellamy's jaw jumped and Clarke had the sudden urge to touch it.

"Are you going to leave again?"

"No," Clarke answered a little too quickly but she's being honest, she can't leave again.

Bellamy nodded, his eyes darted down to her body, definitely not checking her out. "What are you wearing?"

"I came out here to ask to borrow sweats, I haven't done laundry in a couple weeks."

Bellamy smirked, "I remember. Turn the burners off while I get you something."

She nodded as he walked away, turning the burners off on the stove, the Alfredo sauce bubbling perfectly.

"I thought Octavia might have some clothes here but I guess she took everything to her dorm. These are going to be big," Bellamy said startling Clark a little as he placed the clothes on the counter next to her. A worn down navy blue shirt from college and grey sweatpants, meaning he definitely noticed her nipples protruding through the thin fabric of her tank top and Clarke didn't know if it was a good or bad thing.

"I only needed pants," she pressed in as normal a tone as she could muster.

"Take the damn shirt, Clarke," he said normally, though his eyes were darker than ever.

Clarke opened her mouth to argue the point but said "thank you" again.

He nodded and side stepped her to start preparing their plates for dinner.

After dinner they settled on the couch, Bellamy still favored the right arm rest leaving the rest to Clarke. "You still watch Supernatural?"

"No, I haven't had Wednesdays off and it's gotten repetitive. I was watching How to Get Away with Murder but Wes and Laurel's family bullshit really pissed me off and the pregnancy twist was obvious. I want a show that challenges me intellectually, you know? Not something that's been done time and time again."

"You know, it's nicknamed 'boob tube' because it's mindless."

"And yet, we've both been raised on it and we're both perfectly functioning adults."

"You functioning?" Bellamy scoffed.

"I've had a rough few years." Clarke poked him with her toe and he grabbed her ankle. "But I've never been late paying my bills."

"Because that's all being an adult is about." He tugged on her ankle, pulling her closer to him before promptly letting her foot go. "So a documentary on Caesar is in your wheelhouse tonight?"

"Are you going to talk the whole time?" she asked, poking him with her foot again.

"Are you going to throw popcorn at me?" he tickled the sole of her foot and Clarke surged up into the offensive while laughing through Bellamy's onslaught.

Once he stopped and Clarke caught her breath, difficult as it was with the teasing look in his eyes, he said, "I haven't bought your ammo of choice in four years."

"Oh," Clark grimaced, adjusting herself to sit on the couch properly. He'd given up on her. He was fine knowing he'd never see her again. The one person she thought wouldn't give up on her was the one that did.

"Clarke—"

"It's fine. I wasn't coming back and you stopped buying my snack of choice, I don't blame you."

"I couldn't just stop my life because you walked away. Life goes on whether I wanted it to or not."

"Who am I to tell you what to do with your life when I wasn't there?"

"Then stop acting like I'm the bad guy."

"I'm not."

"Good, because I worried about you. I lived my life but I worried about you. I'd be sitting here watching a documentary about Tutankhamen and talking through it expecting a piece of popcorn to be thrown at me or visiting my mom, reaching for your hand on instinct to center me. Then Gina—"

Clarke's head snapped to him and the grimace strewn across his face. "Who's Gina?"

Bellamy shook his head, "I was seeing her for about six months two years ago."

"You… were seeing someone exclusively for six months?"

"Yeah."

"What happened?" Clarke asked then shook her head, it's none of her business. "No, you don't have to tell me."

"I liked her. I probably could have loved her but I didn't integrate her into my life. I was either with her or with our friends or Octavia. They were always separate from her and I didn't know that I was doing it let alone that it was wrong."

Clarke smirked, "Lexa and I dated for two months before we told anyone at work, but it ended horribly after a year and a half so…"

"You tripled my time."

Clarke nodded, she didn't want to talk about their past relationship failures. She didn't want to talk about her time away, all the time they—she—wasted. She wanted to be here with Bellamy, throwing popcorn at him while he talked along with a History Channel documentary he recorded.

Bellamy placed his hand on Clarke's knee, immediately removed it, remembering. "It's okay, I know you'll never hurt me."

Clarke's words rang through Bellamy's head while the Caesar documentary played on the TV. I know you'll never hurt me. He has and he certainly can't guarantee that he won't. The thought plagued him.

He whispered little added details into Clarke's temple, her head rested on his shoulder. Selfishly wishing she cared for him as he did her, her nearly nonexistent tank top and underwear show deepened his desire. He fell in love with her long before he realized how important she was to him after he lost her. He can't do anything to screw this up and lose her again, he doesn't think he could bear it.

After a while Clarke's breathing evened out and Bellamy smirked, grateful that she could get some sleep after everything she's been through this last week.

Once the documentary was over, Bellamy decided to let Clarke sleep peacefully, trying to adjust her so he could get off the sofa but somehow managed to be properly laying down on the couch with Clarke clinging to him like a spider monkey.

"Clarke," he whispered, her only response was grinding her hips, her core, into his thigh, which… FUCK! Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead fucking puppies. It worked, luckily. He couldn't stay on the couch with her, it'd mean too much.

He decided to stay until he knew she wouldn't wake up, this little snore that was insanely adorable, only to fall asleep himself before hearing it.

Waking up to his alarm the next morning was surreal. He didn't know where he was let alone where the loud beeping was coming from to stop it. Managing to get out from under Clarke, he found his nearly dead phone in the kitchen, at least ten texts from Octavia warning him not to get attached to Clarke.

He plugged his phone in to charge and went to shower, getting dressed for a long day of teaching. "Thank God it's Friday" couldn't be truer.

Bellamy grabbed a coffee and bagel at Harper's bakery where she grimaced at him. "You're early."

"Didn't get to plan my lessons last night, have to go in early to do that."

"Pop quiz, it's what my mom always did."

"I promised I'd never do a pop quiz, but desperate times," Bellamy shrugged.

"So what captivated your attention last night?"

"Insanely inaccurate Caesar documentary." Half-truth but Clarke doesn't want people knowing yet.

Harper laughed, "I should have known. Have a good day, Bellamy."

He smiled and left, his next stop being the high school. He hated being here when he doesn't have to be, really hated being early. He walked in, the halls eerily quiet and walked to his classroom, where he quickly put together a pop quiz before reaching for his phone that wasn't… he left it on his nightstand charging. "Shit," he sighed.

"Good morning to you too," Echo smirked walking into the room.

"I left my phone at home."

She nodded, "Kane asked to speak with you before classes start."

Bellamy grimaced, getting sent to the principal's office, literally. It feels the same way it did when he was a student. "Might as well get it over with," he groaned.

Echo walked to the office with him and Bellamy knew she liked him and he didn't want to lead her on but didn't want to make work awkward by letting her down.

Kane's door was open, but Bellamy knocked anyway, Echo sat at her desk typing away at her computer.

"Bellamy! Come in and close the door," Kane half greeted.

Bellamy did and sat across from his mentor.

"This is a social meeting, Bellamy. Relax."

"I'm sorry, Sir, it's the principal's office stigma. I spent a lot of time here in high school."

"I remember sending you here once a month. I hope Jaha wasn't too hard on you."

"At the time I thought he was but he wasn't. So, what's going on?"

"What's this I hear about a Miss Griffin in your afternoon classes yesterday?"

Bellamy grimaced, he knew he shouldn't have used her name when explaining her to his class. Knew Kane would have heard through the grapevine, but still did anyway. "I'm not sure what you're referring to."

"Clarke Griffin? Your partner in crime your senior year here. My step-daughter."

"We were talking about griffins in world history. Mythical half eagle half lion creature."

"Bellamy," Kane sighed.

"Fine, please don't tell Abby, she's in a bad place."

"Where was she?"

"You don't want the answer to that."

"Is she planning on staying?"

"I hope so, but it's Clarke, she does what she wants."

"And you're okay if she leaves again?"

"You remember how I was last year? I saw her and it nearly broke me. I'm probably going with her if she does."

"Bellamy—"

"She can't run away from everything," he said sternly.

"Don't ruin your life for a girl," Kane told him.

"Who else is there?"

"You have a family here."

"I have friends and Octavia is always welcome wherever I am, she knows that."

"Your friends will miss you, Bellamy."

"I need her, Kane."

"How long have you been in love with her?"

"I don't—" Bellamy shook his head. "I think before the accident I realized she meant more to me than just a friend, best friend even. Then she left and didn't know how to deal with it. It was like a void but also like my heart was ripped out of my chest."

"That's called heartbreak," Kane added.

"Yeah, the same thing happened last year after I saw her. After all that, if I lose her again… I won't be able to handle it."

Kane nodded, "I won't tell Abby, no one will pressure Clarke to stay when they find out she's back."

Bellamy nodded, hating that someone else knew and it hasn't even been a day.

"You left your phone," he heard during his lunch period.

He looked up to find Clarke standing in his doorway and he couldn't help but smile. She was wearing the same torn jeans she wore yesterday and his old Mecca hoodie. Her hair was adorably unkempt, like she tried, but her waves won out in the end. "I did."

"You should have woke me up."

"You were exhausted last night and looked so peaceful."

Clarke smirked stepping into the room and Bellamy realized that she didn't cover her bruises.

"Kane knows you're back, he said he won't tell Abby."

Her face dropped and Bellamy would do anything to bring a smile to her face.

"You didn't have to bring me my phone, I would have come home to get it."

Clarke nodded.

"What's wrong, Princess?"

"You know you have no food in your house?" she said nearly just as quickly, she's avoiding his questions.

Bellamy chuckled, "There's food you just have to make it. The fact that you still only eat premade meals is horrible."

"I wasn't made to be a chef."

Bellamy watched Clarke stand in the middle of his classroom and he wondered what she was thinking, what he could do to help her, if she needed to get anything from Polis.

"Do you need to go back to Polis for anything? I'll take you, make sure that guy—" he stopped himself when Clarke shook her head with a bright smile.

"You can't stop your life for me, you have plans this weekend. Miller and Raven have been texting you, they woke me up actually. Go hang out with them, I—"

"What if I'd rather spend the weekend with you? I apparently need groceries."

"Don't stop your life for me."

"I'm not, I'm not leaving you alone in my apartment with no food while I hang out with a bunch of people who want to know you're okay and I can't tell them."

"You can tell them."

"Clarke—"

"Don't. I—I know why I came back and maybe I shouldn't have, I'm burdening you. I—I should just go to California or somewhere he won't find me."

"Why did you come back if you shouldn't have?"

"Because I—you make me feel safe, Bell. I needed that yesterday."

"So stay! God, Clarke, you don't realize the effect you have on people! You can't pop in and out and expect people to be okay with that. I was devastated when you left, I'm lucky everyone is still friends with me. And then coming back after seeing you, begging you to come home, I almost moved to Polis with no plan, no job, just so I could keep an eye on you, make sure you were safe, but I didn't. I knew you'd send me back here. You can't just leave again, not this time, not without me."

"I can't ask you to up end your life for me. I'm a stripper, Bellamy, we're a dime a dozen."

"You're not! You are Clarke Griffin, you're nearly a doctor. You're worth more than you think you do."

"Bellamy—"

The bell rang and Bellamy didn't know if he was angry or thankful that his classroom is going to be filled with fifteen year olds and he won't be able to finish this conversation with her.

She walked over to him at his desk and placed his phone on it and she pulled away. "I'm going to get some food, a few things I can make myself this weekend."

"Clarke—"

"I'll be gone by Monday."

"Please don't."

"I can't live with all the memories here."

"It wasn't your fault. It was a car accident, your response time was perfect, you analyzed the situation and helped the people that were hurt the most first. You did your job."

"Twenty people died!"

"You saved who you could. How can you not see that?"

"Because twenty people still died!" she exclaimed as Charlie walked in the door, freezing at her outburst.

"Charlie, take your seat. Miss Griffin, either come sit down or…" Bellamy shook his head. "We need to discuss your decision."

"I—" Clarke walked over to him and he saw the tears rolling down her face.

"You're shouting in my classroom with students coming in and these kids saw you yesterday and you didn't cover your neck or forehead today so they're going to ask questions if you don't cover up," he whispered as two more students walked in. "Are you staying or going?"

"Going, I—I'll go back to your apartment."

"Harper's bakery, it has really good coffee if you're interested. She can keep a secret."

"She can," Clarke agreed and leaned in, kissing his cheek. "I'm sorry."

"Don't you dare leave me again."

Clarke gave him a weak smile before throwing her hood on to hide her bruises, "I'll see you at three."

The bell rang and Clarke fought with a group of kids walking into class to get out.

"Alright, class, pop quiz. If you've been studying, you should be fine, if not, you're screwed."