A/N: Good evening all, back to school tomorrow (urrgh)! I think you'll enjoy a certain cameo appearance in this one ;) Hannah xxx
PS: There might be quite a few fluffy chs for a while as I am putting off writing xits wounds for the obvious reasons... but I'm sure you won't mind the fluff!
I woke up in the middle of the night to hear Jack muttering in his sleep, which is peculiar for two reasons: 1) Although he often manages to fall comfortably into sleep these days, I am almost always asleep at the same time as he is, and it's very rare for me to have a wrestles night, and 2) because Jack never sleep talks, not ever. It was about three o 'clock in the morning and I had been asleep for a little while, but it had been a restless and light stretch of sleep, and the light sounds emulating from Jack's lips was all that was needed to nudge me awake. At first it was hard to work out what he was saying as his arm was half draped across my head and was covering up the ear that was closest to him, and I was a little reluctant to remove it because it smelled so nice… but once I did, I began to make out a few words.
"Gray"
"I'm sorry Gray"
"I love you…"
"Don't go!"
"Gray…"
Gray. I wonder who Gray is, I mean, I don't want to start getting all psychotic and jealous or anything – but I love you? He's never said that to me… well at least not directly, so who was this Gray that warranted his full confession of affection? At the time I just shrugged it off as nothing, got up to take a sip of my water and then settled back off to sleep draping Jack's arm around me once again, completely forgetting about it as soon my head hit the pillow again. And even when I woke up this morning I had still forgotten, when I greeted Jack's blue eyes just watching me as they usually did, while I stirred awake in my (our?) bed, only thinking about how nice it was to wake up like this most mornings… but then I saw the greyundershirt that Jack put on and it all came back. Now I can't stop thinking about it… But I don't want to pry, of course, so I might just have to try and subtly slip into conversation later…
To be honest, if I had worked out how to phrase it, I probably could have asked Jack one hundred times about who this mysterious 'Gray' is because today's shift at work – up until now at least - has been the most incredibly boring one yet. There are often days that go by without any rift alerts or police calls to attend to, but there are always things to do instead usually, like paperwork or cleaning, but today there's been literally nothing so far. We arrived in at work as normal at around quarter to six, well Jack and I did anyway, and have been here just pottering around attempting to amuse ourselves at the very least, even if nothing useful can be done right now. So far I've made everyone at least six cups of coffee and Jack's been doing impressions all morning and we had a big game of twister (that I would have won if Jack hadn't tickled me just at the opportune moment) which was all jolly entertaining… but it's almost one o'clock now and everyone is growing very bored and, some of us at least, a little irritable.
Owen has just come out of Jack's shower and is currently off sulking on the sofa and hogging our big old box-like television in order to watch Jeremy Kyle because his latest experiment (goodness knows what it actually is for) just exploded over him, and he is none too pleased about that. Toshiko seems to have completed that piece of circuit board coding that she was working on, and has now sunk to playing solitaire on one of her many computers. Gwen's been on the phone to Rhys for the last hour or so because it's his day off, and I'd say that she might as well have just gone home – or at least out to lunch – to meet him in person… but they appear to be having an argument judging by the tone of her rising voice. Jack is up in his office doing goodness knows what, he's got the blind drawn on the window so none of us can see in and the door is shut which is a rarity for him, and there's a worrying amount of noise coming from up there, I secretly think he's having a miniature rave to bad seventies disco music. And I, well I am writing in this currently (obviously), but before that I was working on a Sudoku – Tosh has got me rather hooked on them – but I gave up because this one really was impossibly hard and has now ended up in the bin. Hopefully we'll get a nice Weevil to chase sooner or later.
Boredom leads to bad things, very bad things. I think that perhaps I may have just made one of the most ill informed decisions of my entire life, which is hardly a great feat as I am usually so rational and level headed, but this particular choice can only lead to downfall surely? I have engaged in a bet with one Captain Jack Harkness. My Captain Jack Harkness who is notorious for his past life as a professional con merchant, the man who could charm Eskimo into buying ice cubes and the very Jack who is highly trained in the art of 'pranking'… and I have engaged in a bet with him.
After another hour which involved little more productivity than the previous ones – other than me providing lunch in the form of chicken Caesar wraps for everyone – I finally decided to go up to Jack's office and find out a) what on earth he was doing up there that was causing such an odd sounding racket, and that was causing dust to float down from the ceiling beneath his room, and b) perhaps slyly mention Gray… but I only got to part a) in the end as all of my coherent thoughts were lost the second I entered into that office.
Jack, from somewhere inside the concealed pit which was his office at that moment, must have heard me running up the stairs as all noise and movement ceased as I approached the door and prepared to knock. And then, before my fist had even had the chance to come into contact with the wood of the door he opened it, peering out with just his head exposed.
He grinned, "Ah Ianto, bear with me" He winked and slammed the door shut, leaving me quite startled there for a moment.
"Come in" He shouted thirty seconds later from behind the closed door.
And so with trepidation I entered, and found him inside rapidly trying to create a sense of order within the chaotic bombsite that currently was his usually relatively tidy working space. Every single filing cabinet had been emptied and over turned, book shelves were collapsed and free of all novels, the contents of his draws were covering the carpet of clothing and shoes and folders and files and, rather worryingly, there were several dangerous weapons just casually tossed into the mix. Oh and to add to my confusion Jack was there in his underwear, just his underwear and nothing more, hurriedly re-arranging the clutter clad in his boxers.
It was too much. He hadn't made eye contact with me yet, though he must have noticed me come in, so quickly I left the room shut the door and took a moment to breath. Why on earth was he there, rifling messily through his belongings in only his underwear? It just didn't make sense. I was sure I'd just imagined what I'd seen; it felt like one of those bizarre dreams that are so surreal because it felt like it almost could have been real. I took a deep breath and re-entered.
And, sure enough, he was still in there, the room was still a complete tip and he was still wearing next to nothing, this time he looked up.
"Sorry about the mess" He grinned.
I just stood a gape and mumbled something relatively unintelligible.
He laughed. "Don't worry this isn't what it looks like!" He said, gesturing towards his boxers and the around the room in its state of disarray.
"And, pray tell, what does it look like?" I asked in reply, still stunned and confused by what was going on.
He laughed again, "Fair point" he shrugged simply and began wandering over to greet me.
"Are you going to tell me what you're doing?"
"No." He said quickly, kissing away my questions before I had a chance to protest. "Are you going to tell me why you've come to see me?" he asked.
"No." I pouted briefly. "I was just wondering if you fancied lunch… I've made the others theirs already as we've been so ridiculously inactive all morning." By this point I could barely remember that, let alone my sub reason for going to see him: to investigate this Gray business.
"Yes I'd like some lunch please" He replied. "And I'm just looking for something, that's all" He assured me.
"In your underwear?" I questioned, eyebrows raised.
"Well… it got a bit warm… and I might have spilt some oil on my shirt and…" He stumbled through, a little flustered which was quite amusing.
"So naturally, you thought you'd just carry on half naked rather than change?" I questioned smiling.
"Exactly" He smiled back.
"Fair play… but how do you explain the mess?" I laughed.
"It's a very hard to find something and I don't want to leave a stone, or a book case, un turned"
"Do you need any help?"
"No, no. It's sort of a surprise" He winked.
"Alright" I said and made to leave.
Now, this is when I made the worst decision I have all day, all week perhaps. I was just going to turn around and leave his office, go and make him a wrap too, take it up, and return to an afternoon of idly trying to fill the time and praying for rift activity… but then he called me back.
"Wait, Ianto don't rush off. I have got something that you could help me with" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
"Jack, I don't care how dead everything is workwise; we are not doing that with the others two feet below us!"
He mock pouted, "Shame… but that wasn't what I was suggesting" He grinned and I motioned for him to carry on. "How would you feel about a having a little bet, just something to liven up the atmosphere around here a little bit"
"Well that depends, what do you have in mind?" I asked back foolishly, I should have just been sensible and said no rout right. But, of course, as usual I am always easily persuaded by Jack… and Jack only in boxers is even harder to refuse, I'm only human.
"Well, I was thinking, let's both get a rabbit and I bet you that I can keep mine here in the hub the longest without one of the others finding it" He chuckled impishly, evidently pleased with his somewhat childish, yet actually rather brilliant, idea.
"Hmm sounds interesting" I replied, and it did.
"It does doesn't it, so shall we place a monetary bet… or would you rather something else?"
I quirked an eyebrow upwards, "Well, you're still my boss remember so you sort of pay me… so how about 'something else'… what did you have in mind?"
"That whoever loses the bet is the personal slave to the winner for a day, and must do absolutely anything that the other asks them too" His eyes gleamed with a devilish wickedness.
"Excellent" I replied faux confidently, as inside I was already anxious… anything… surely this can only end badly? "How shall we obtain the rabbits?" I asked, trying to keep it cool.
"Seeing as we're quiet, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind nipping to Pets at Home now… I'd come with you but…" He gestured once again towards the abomination of an office and to his near nakedness… and suddenly I noticed that it really was getting rather warm in there.
"Certainly" I smiled, kissed him on the cheek and left before I made any other ridiculous agreements.
And so now, I have just taken up to him the before mentioned Caesar salad wrap and am about to sneak out for half an hour or so to purchase two rabbits (I am so keeping the more tame looking one) and surreptitiously bring them back in without rousing any suspicion… all in the name of a ludicrous bet which seems to have some very high stakes attached to it! Honestly I don't think boredom, or nakedness, should be allowed within the hub – it just leads to bad, bad, bad things. I mean, how on Earth am I supposed to hide a rabbit? Yes, I know of all the secret passageways and hidden rooms within the building that none of the others (perhaps not even Jack) knows about… but we're restricting it to just the main floor. And how am I supposed to beat Jack? He cheats at everything so I'm sure he'll find a way to cheat at this. Damn.
You'd think that when one rather shadily leave the workplace in the middle of the day, under the pretence of 'coffee buying', to go and round up two rabbits for a bet, that the very act of doing so would be the weirdest possible thing in that situation; but you'd be wrong.
For starters, as I entered the pet shop I received some very odd looks from customers and employees alike – I guess that it's not usual for a grown man to walk straight on in to a pet shop in the middle of the working day, and start eying up the bunny rabbits. Let alone a grown man dressed in a full three piece suit… As I was discussing with one of the younger members of staff about which breeds were easier to care for, which were the most docile, which were the smallest – all the sorts of things you need to know for a rabbit based bet – the sales assistant kept looking like she was fighting off laughter throughout the whole conversation. In fact, she seemed stunned when I eventually settled upon two and had them placed in carriers to take to the till, it seems that she though it had all been a bit of a wind up. But even this wasn't the funny (or rather strange) part.
As I was walking over to the cash desk, an occupied rabbit carrier in each hand, I couldn't help but notice a rather intriguing looking man staring at me. It was different to how the others in the shops had been staring at me, less of a 'what-on-earth-are-you-doing-this-is-strange' kind of stare and more of an 'hmm-do-I-know-you-from-somewhere?' type of stare. I think it was this kind anyway, I mean, the man himself looked so peculiarly out of place that he couldn't have possibly been staring at me like the others were.
He was young, perhaps the same age as me, yet he had the same sort of oldness in his eyes as Jack does. He had a very expressive and interesting face, it wasn't quite handsome, but it wasn't quite odd either, and the most wonderfully maintained yet somehow wild hair imaginable. He was dressed in a way which absolutely suited him and that I don't think anyone else from this modern age would be able to pull off nearly as well; he was wearing a tweed jacket with suede elbow patches, a red bow tie, braces and a pair of straight leg trousers and a funny pair of black pixie like boots.
It took me a moment to realise that I'd suddenly been staring back at him then for a good while and so I quickly turned and looked away, but not before noticing that suddenly his eyes grew bright with recognition and he had begun walking his way over to me.
"Ianto Jones!" He called out, making a large and ridiculous waving gesture with his arm, dropping the book on goldfish that he had been holding.
He waltzed over to me and greeted me with a light kiss on each cheek much to my surprise, causing even more people around us to start staring, but I didn't really register this at the time as I was desperately trying to rack my brains as to who this could be – someone from University? Someone my sister was friends with? Certainly not someone that I knew very well…
"Gosh! Look at you… it's been, blimey it's been a while hasn't it, the last time we met it must have been…?" He paused to rub his forehead and I just stood there still not having said anything, desperately hoping he'd say something like 'Rhi and Johnny's wedding' or 'graduation'… anything that might help.
"No, no it's gone" He eventually drew his hand away sighing. "SO how have you been?" He clapped his hands together excitedly.
"Umm well thank you, yourself?" I answered and asked politely – still having no idea whatsoever who this man was.
"Ah brilliant, brilliant, me? Oh I'm just the same as ever, madman with a box… or rather without, the Ponds have gone on holiday with her and I'm grounded for a bit!" He grinned.
"Right, what a shame." I replied, barely knowing what I was saying to this man who clearly was as he said mad. I mean, what box, what pond? A pond in a garden?
"So how's Jack then – you two starting a family?" He gestured towards the two rabbits and I had to fight back a choke. Who was this complete and utter stranger who knew both Jack and I, I haven't told anybody about us besides Rhiannon and anyone within Torchwood, I not even sure of anyone from UNIT even knows… so who was he?
"Yeah yeah, he's fine. Look, I'm terribly sorry, I don't mean to be rude at all… but who exactly are you?" I asked nervously.
He laughed and then his face fell as soon as he noticed my own serious and anxious expression. "Oh, you're being serious. You really don't know me yet do you?" He asked.
"Sorry, but what do you mean by 'yet'?" Surely he's not from the future… is he?
He suddenly violently smacked his forehead and cried out, attracting further attention from the other customers. "Oh stupid, stupid! Of course, not yet! It's too soon, hasn't happened yet… spoilers and all that… must dash… just forget I was here!" He finished running off and out of the store, leaving me there feeling rather winded and shocked with sheer confusion for the whole situation.
Eventually I recomposed myself to join the queue and pay for the two rabbits, rather handily they were £20 each or two for £30 so by buying both of them together Jack and I have saved a tenner.
Somehow I made it back into the hub with both rabbits in tow without being spotted by any of the others, it's Justas well that the rift never played up this afternoon, and even better still that none of them ever check the coffee supplies as they would find them suspiciously well stocked. As I entered the room everyone was still in their same positions and only a few details had changed: Owen had now moved on to watching Come Dine With Me, Gwen was now arguing with her Mother over the phone and not Rhys, and Tosh has now moved on to chess on the computer. I hurried up to Jack's office where, thankfully, there was no more noise coming from and knocked on the door.
"Ianto is that you?"
"Yes, can I come in" I asked a little nervously, worried as to what I might find on the other side of the door this time.
"Of course" I could hear the grin in his voice.
I opened the door with trepidation, but I needn't have worried as I opened it to find the sight of an almost fully clothed (he was just in trousers and an undershirt – white this time) Jack and an almost immaculate office. He was grinning triumphantly and pointing towards the large old fashioned gramophone which was now taking up a sizable spot on his desk.
"It's amazing what you can do in forty five minutes; usually it takes you an hour to help dry the dishes!" I teased jovially.
He rolled his eyes, and pointed more definitely towards the gramophone.
I set the rabbits down. "Is that what you were looking for? Because you know that that was down in one of the store rooms right?"
He rolled his eyes again. "Yes, I did know that thank-you-very-much-smart-arse, but it was the new needles that I was looking for."
"So this is my surprise then?" I asked, a little confused, I mean I do love old things… but I was unsure as to why he was presenting me with a gramophone.
"No, this is your surprise" He grinned and dimmed the lights in his office and whipped a record out of its sleeve and placed it on the deck, dropping the needle elegantly into place. As the soft 'click' noise of the needle coming in to contact with the vinyl sounded, he quickly walked back over to me and took me in his arms, just in time for the opening of 'Stardust' to begin playing.
Gently we began moving in time to the rich and orchestral music, bodies closer than they should have been really for us to dance properly, but neither of us cared, we were both content to just slowly sway and take in each other's heat and smell and touch. We didn't speak throughout the entire song, just kept there, silent, with our eyes shut and feet cautiously pacing.
When the song ended, far too quickly for my liking, I pulled back a little from him in order to look properly into his eyes. "That was a lovely surprise, thank you" I said, and brushed a hand lightly past his cheek.
"You're welcome, I hope you'd enjoy it" He smiled back and lightly rubbed his nose against my own and kissed the tip, and then moved on to planting further kisses down my jawline.
And then we both remembered the presents (Well sort of presents) that I had bought for us both as one of the tow new additions to the Torchwood group let out a slightly muffled, and rather adorable, squeak from within her (both girls, don't want any funny business, two rabbits are more than enough to hide thank you very much!) carrier.
Jack laughed, "You managed to get them without being caught out then?"
"Yeah, it was no bother to sneak past those lot, they've turned into zombie-esque versions of themselves with this lack of work." I laughed back. "I did however have a very strange ordeal at Pets at Home…"
"Oh, strange how?"
"Well… there was a very peculiar man there, a total stranger; he greeted me with a kiss on each cheek, asked how I was and then asked how you were, and then when I very politely told him that I had no idea who he was, he suddenly ran off and told me to forget that I'd seen him, something about us not having met yet… something about spoilers? It was all very odd."
"Hmm… I wonder" Jack said, rubbing at his chin in that way he does when he's attempting to piece together a puzzle. "Was he quite tall and handsome and wearing a pin stripe suit? Did he have dark hair and sideburns, glasses maybe, and a long coat, and did he say anything to do with bananas?"
"Umm no, sorry, no bananas were mentioned. And he was tallish, but no, he wasn't wearing a pin striped suit or a long coat and he certainly didn't have sideburns or glasses, and I wouldn't have called him handsome… at least not traditionally so… why do you ask?" I questioned, hoping that Jack might have been able to tell me who this mystery madman was.
His face fell a little, "Oh don't worry, then it's nothing… I just thought…"
"Thought?"
"Well, from the way you described him initially he sounded like the Doctor… but it can't be him."
"Oh, well I wouldn't know, sorry."
"Ah, not to worry…I'm sure he'll pop up one day, who knows with him! Right now we have to focus on what we are going to name these two rabbits of ours" he grinned and bent down to peek at them through the bars on the carriers.
"Well" I began, bending down to join him, "I was thinking about Thelma and Louise?"
He looked up from the rabbits and over to me, "Perfect" He smiled that beaming Harkness grin.
I still have no idea how we're going to keep them down here in the main room of the hub without them being noticed, especially if the rift activity picks up in the next couple of days as the two of us can hardly be sneaking off every twenty minutes or so to go and check on them, or to go and replace their food or water. For now they're still in Jack's office as the bet doesn't officially start until tomorrow, but we'll be bringing them out to play with once the others go home. I never would have thought that playing with a rabbit could be so entertaining, but they really are rather cute. And I still haven't mentioned Gray, I'm not really too sure how to, perhaps tomorrow…