March 5th, 1977
"I want fireworks."
"He hates loud noises, especially during his monthly gift."
"Oh, but it'll be festive."
We have to do this for, Remus, not for you, Sirius."
James and Sirius sat in the corner of Common Room. It was late Saturday afternoon and also Remus' day of birth. Although, they have not seen the birthday boy all day, they had to prepare for his big night. It so happened that Remus' birthday also landed on the same day as his full moon. This has yet to happen since they turned Animagi.
"Everyone is happier when Sirius is happy," Sirius explained simply. "Am I wrong?"
James shook his head. He ignored his friend's comment as the opened their own map of the Forbidden Forest. The Marauder's Map did not cover the illicit grounds yet, but they were working on it. Each full moon they continued to explore the area and mapped their way through. Soon enough, and hopefully before graduation, there would be no part unexplored.
Peter skittered into the Common Room, causing the two boys to regard him with wide-eyes. The smallest friend looked as if he had just ran a marathon - not that he would run for anything besides food. He bent over and said, "Poppy took him."
"What? Already?" James asked, mind blown. "It's not even supper time yet."
Peter let out a long exhale, bending backwards to stretch his body. "Yeah, well, he looked like shite. He looked more like the Loch Ness Monster than a werewolf."
The Marauders looked up to the sky. The moon wasn't up yet, but night was coming. The gray sky was turning a pale orange, hidden behind the clouds.
"I hope it's not too bad," worried Peter. "It would suck if he couldn't play on his birthday."
Sirius nodded in agreement. "Because otherwise he's a ruddy murder. He doesn't need that on his birthday."
"He's already feeling like shite emotionally because of Meadowes," added James. "Wonder when she'll forgive him."
"Or if." Sirius shrugged as his two friends glared at him. "I'm just making observations - the girl is as tough as nails. I don't expect her to take grudges lightly."
James wanted to refute this, for the sake of Remus, but maybe Sirius had a point. The Slytherin Beater was not a simple person, and as she said, she has a lot of dark shit going on in her life. It would be downright awful if she never forgave him. Especially for someone like Remus.
"Oy, your three o'clock, Mate," Sirius said, snapping James out of his thoughts.
He looked up to see Camilla Henley coming down the stairs slowly. Truthfully, James had been avoiding two birds in the past two days: Lily Evans and her. James couldn't bear the guilt, so he ignored it like the black plague. But what do you do when it's right in your face?
"Hi Pettigrew, Hi Black," Camilla said in a soft yet kind voice. The two boys gave her a nod of acknowledgement. She turned to face James with bright brown eyes. She asked, "Can I speak with you a moment? Do you mind?"
"Er, sure," James said in his best non-awkward voice. It was a failed attempt. He stood up and followed Camilla into another corner. When he noticed his friends staring like they were at a Quidditch match, he gave them a stern 'fuck-you' look. Peter snapped his head away, and Sirius let out a scoff before turning back to the map.
"So, what'd you want to talk about?" James asked hastily.
Camilla tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I was hoping that you and I could have a night tonight. Just you and me. It's been a while, hasn't it?"
"I can't," he said too fast. He noticed Camilla's clear disapproval so he added, "Tonight is Remus' birthday. I have to celebrate with him. You know, stag night." He did his best not to boast his own joke.
"Oh," she said shortly. "That makes sense."
"Yeah, but maybe tomorrow or something? I'll let you know," James offered, trying to do his best at chivalry.
Camilla nodded but said nothing. She pressed her lips into a tight line before saying, "I understand. Tell Lupin I wish him a happy birthday, okay?"
James felt a tension between them, something he had yet to feel. Sometimes there was sexual tension, definitely that. But this was something else. This was distance. It was like a breaking rope becoming a small thread.
"I will," James nodded.
Camilla walked away without another word. She didn't look back at him as she exited the Common Room, not saying where she was going either. She didn't acknowledge Sirius or Peter either - she was too forgone. She wanted nothing to do with the Marauders, not a single one. However, she wasn't filled with rage like she had expected to be. She was focused on Dirk Cresswell's words: James Potter just wasn't ready for her.
Mary MacDonald believed that maybe Emmeline Kim was not ready for this conversation. She was still mourning the loss of a relationship, and more specifically, she was in the angry phase. Em wanted not a thing to do with any words that started with Robert or ended with Vance.
They walked together up the staircase. Emmeline held her books tightly in her hands and was absolutely silent. As they walked up to the seventh floor bathroom, they had encountered Robert Vance. He was simply reading a letter as he made eye contact with his former girlfriend. He tried to wave, but simply got a hair flip instead.
"Are you okay, Em?" Mary asked even though she knew the answer. She wasn't even sure why she had asked it.
"No, I am not," Emmeline said firmly, marching up the stairs. At least she was honest.
"Maybe you ought to give him a chance." The smaller witch hoped she hadn't said anything too revealing. She really didn't want to put words in someone else's mouth
Emmeline stopped on the stairs and gave her friend an appalled look, as if Mary had suggested running around the castle in the nude. "Mary!"
"All I am saying is that maybe he is actually sorry." Mary put her hands up for extra defense.
"I saw him being straddled like a goddamn horse by Talkalot," Emmeline hissed. "What else is there to talk about?"
Mary stammered on meaningless words. There was no coherency because she wasn't even sure what to say. Her fumble sparked a new interest in her friend though.
Emmeline narrowed her eyes at her best mate. "You spoke to him, didn't you?"
The curly-haired witch pursed her lips. "I may have," she said slowly, trying to lessen the blow.
Emmeline made a drawn-out noise. "Mary, how could you!"
"Vance has been badgering me, all right? Following me around like a lost puppy because all he wants to talk about is you. Now, we've never been the chummiest of housemates, so don't you think that means something."
Emmeline, for once, decided not to speak.
"He really wants to talk to you, Em," Mary said with a soft smile. "He wants to explain his behavior, and it may not be right. But shouldn't you give him a chance, after a year-and-half worth of dating and snogging."
As if she were on a LSD trip, Emmeline's mind scattered. As if she were flipping through a photo album, Emmeline's mind showered her with past memories of Robert and herself: the time they first kissed after last year's Halloween dinner, their study dates in the Astronomy Tower, and when he asked her to be his girlfriend in the Common Room. Her trip down memory lane made a compelling argument.
"Was there anything else he said?" Emmeline asked quietly. She still did not want to admit defeat.
Mary searched for the words mentally but in the end said, "He should explain it all. It would be weird coming from me, but I promise to be by your side no matter how you take what he says."
Mary's vague reply gave Emmeline two emotional responses. She wanted to further interrogate her friend, but also wanted to hug her. In the end, she chose the latter before they walked into the Seventh Floor Girl's Bathroom.
The air was steamy, and the light was dim inside their self-designated bathroom. The tub in the center was filled with light purple water and smelled of lavender. Lily Evans had her back leaning against the edge and looked perfectly calm. Marlene McKinnon was in the middle of tub, swimming her way through mountains of bubbles. Dorcas Meadowes sat on the edge, with just her feet touching the surface. The girls looked perfectly calm.
But, that was only for a moment until Marlene looked back at Lily and Dorcas and shouted, "Yeah, played the bloody piano for me like it was the Moulin Rouge."
Emmeline raised an eyebrow. She thought she was upset. "Who tried to court you?" She asked as she began to disrobe.
Lily popped only one eye open to see her friends. She smirked, "Sirius and Marlene have a bit of bet."
"Ooh, drama," Mary smiled. "Share."
Marlene gave Lily a stern look. She dipped her hair under water and slicked it back. "Sirius is under this far-gone impression that he can somehow… win me over," she clarified.
"Is it that far-gone?" Dorcas asked rhetorically as she examined her fingernails.
Marlene splashed Dorcas with water. The brunette glared, but chose to remain silent. "It is far-gone," Marlene insisted. "Either way, I am going to win this bet."
"So, let me get this straight," Emmeline said as she dipped into the pool gracefully. "You made a bet with Sirius Black that he couldn't win you over?"
"Precisely," Marlene nodded proudly.
"Do you mean just in terms of shagging or… emotionally?"
Lily raised her head finally and opened her eyes. She gave Emmeline and Mary a knowing look and said, "the latter." She added a wink for dramatic effect.
Emmeline and Mary both gasped as if they had seen one of the male ghosts in their bathroom. "You didn't," Mary murmured, still in shock.
"Marls, when was the last time you actually wanted to date someone?" Emmeline asked. "And I mean more than just shag for a day or two?"
The blond thought about this for a long moment, but came up with a simple conclusion: "Never."
"So, you're going to make poor Black run around chasing you like a dog after a bone?" Mary added.
"I would never use the word 'poor' and 'Black' in the same sentence," Dorcas interjected.
"Thank you, Dorcas," Marlene pointed out. "Either way, the prat needs to learn that women aren't his just for the taking. And if it's through heartbreak with me then so be it."
"So, you are doing this for witches, on a global scale?" Mary asked.
Marlene pouted, "When you put it like that, aye?"
"You know this is going to end poorly for one of you, right?" Lily said reasonably. "Either, you are going to get hurt -" Marlene let out a "please" - "or Sirius is going to get hurt. Or better yet, James is going to get hurt."
Marlene opened her mouth for a retort, but instead, a scowl appeared. "Why you so concerned with my cousin's well-being? Do you fancy him?" She asked mockingly.
Lily's eyes widened before she closed them. She rested her head back against the edge and said nothing.
Dorcas, who really wasn't to blame for her own telepathic skills, simple gawked for a minute. She looked down at Lily with wide eyes and said, "No way. You enjoyed it."
Lily snapped up and asked, "Did you just read my mind? Wait, how did you know!"
Dorcas instantly blushed but chose to keep her mouth shut. She knew she was wrong to do look into someone else's mind, but Lily's mind was currently in a state of shambles. It was hard not to get at least one clear reading.
Marlene put up her hands like a referee. "Wait, wait! What's going on!"
"Dorcas being nosy," Lily grumbled petulantly.
"Okay, okay, you know I can't control it all the time, not since the Quidditch match against Ravenclaw," insisted Dorcas. "I didn't mean to, but you ought to tell them."
"Did you know beforehand?"
Dorcas again kept quiet.
"Why didn't you tell me that you knew?!" Lily insisted, exasperated.
"What's going on!?" Emmeline asked.
Dorcas and Lily exchanged a long meaningful look before the ginger let out a long sigh. "I may have kissed James."
Because she was a dramatic to her core, Marlene pretended to drown and slipped under the water. Emmeline gawked, while Mary looked like a proud mother.
"About damn time!" Mary said, clapping.
"Why are you endorsing this!" Lily countered. "It was one mishap stemmed from copious amounts of sexual tension! It means nothing."
Emmeline began to rub her temples. "I'm going through overload," she announced to herself.
When Marlene came back up for air, she began howling. The noise bounced around the bathroom and got even louder. "Oh, it's a good day, Ladies. It's a good day."
"It is not!" countered Lily. "I shouldn't have done it."
"You initiated it?" Mary asked, still on a high. "This gets better and better. Where'd you do it? When'd you do it?"
Lily closed her eyes, this time out of frustration. "After detention with Flitwick. I don't know what happened, he was holding me-"
"Whoa, whoa, Mary, cover your ears," Emmeline said, protecting the innocent one's pure mind.
"Sod off," Mary said, shooing her friend away. "I have to hear this. Why was he holding you?"
"I was about to fall from one of the ladder, and he caught me. And well, I don't know, it just conjured something. Maybe it's because of Connor, but I wanted to be… held."
"Or shagged," Dorcas added dryly.
Lily punched Dorcas in the calf. The Slytherin didn't react to the pain, but simply said, "Tell yourself whatever you'd like about Connor, but this had nothing to do with Connor, did it?"
"Out. Of. My. Head." Lily said sternly.
"You don't need to be a ligilmens to know when someone else feels guilty," the brunette said earnestly. "But, I can show you your thoughts from that night's soire, if you'd like."
Some teenage girls may have been highly threatened by this notion, or so Dorcas thought. But, these girls were different. Marlene waded through the bubbles to get closer to Dorcas and rested her hands on the Slytherin's knees. "Can you really do that? I've been waiting for this moment for the past three years, and would love to see it with me own eyes." She was so excited that her Scottish accent was making its true appearance.
Lily pushed her in the shoulder. "Fuck off, Marlene." She genuinely sounded irritated.
"How long are you going to keep playing this game, Lily?" Marlene countered, with her own irritation rising. "I mean, Dorcas can literally replay what went on that night if you need further proof."
"Proof of what?"
"Proof to show you how idiotic this game is between you two. Proof that you want to snog each other senseless and shag each other's brains out!"
Dorcas made a gagging noise at the visceral images provided.
"There is no game to play," Lily corrected. "James is with Camilla!"
"And everyone in this room, including yourself, knows that James would drop Camilla in a heartbeat if it meant getting a chance to be a with you. Yet, you are the only one who has an issue with that."
Just by the decibel of Marlene's voice, the three non-Gryffindors knew to keep their mouths quiet. Both Marlene and Lily were significantly more hot-headed than other three, so perhaps it would just be best to not interfere.
"Dorcas! What does James think about most?" Marlene asked, trying to prove a point. If she wasn't a musician, the girl would make a talented lawyer.
Dorcas kept inspecting her nails.
"Dorcas!" shouted Marlene.
The Slytherin did not like demands, but by the way that Marlene was trying to prove the truth, it was hard not to listen. Also, Lily now looked interested too. She was trying hard to demonstrate indifference, but it was a feeble attempt.
"Well, James tends to think about only a selection of things," Dorcas murmured, suddenly becoming embarrassed of her own abilities. "He thinks about his parents and their old age, Quidditch, and birds."
"See!" Lily said, proudly.
Dorcas continued, "but recently, he's been replaying your snog session in the staircase during lectures. Another girl has entered his mental plane in at least weeks."
Lily couldn't contain her blush. She was still ticked though as she looked up at Dorcas and asked, "You knew?"
"Yes, but it wasn't my business to say anything."
"Then, why did you gasp when Marlene mentioned James not a moment ago?"
Dorcas shrugged, "Truthfully, I had always known that James was into you. Everyone knows that. But, what was really interesting was that you can't mentally deny that you feel guilty about snogging Potter. And people only feel guilty if a) they know they're wrong or b) they enjoyed it. So, I'm taking that you enjoy liking Potter, but you know you shouldn't?" She was trying to dumb it down for the rest of the girls, because verbally explaining cognitive processes made very little sense.
Lily crossed her arms and took a few deep breaths. "I hate him."
"Does that work like a mantra for you?" Marlene asked. "Or, have you just been telling yourself that long enough that you know believe it?"
Lily's will for hate was dwindling. Everything was making more and more sense. Well, no. It didn't make any sense that she actually fancied James Potter, and just in time for him to date another girl. But, the whole situation was more clear now. She couldn't help her feelings, and she had to admit that.
"Even if I don't hate him," Lily said after a minute, "I already messed everything up."
"What else happened?" Mary asked quietly, not wanting Lily to feel bombarded with questions.
Lily wiped a hand over her face and said, "I told him that we couldn't do it again."
"Oh, goody, just dragging on the inevitable," Marlene scoffed.
Lily ignored her sarcasm. "My feelings for James make me feel guilty. It's been making me feel guilty for months now, and so I told him that we couldn't do this anymore. That we could only be friends."
"And what'd he say?" Emmeline asked.
"He told me that… it was done for him too," Lily said, her eyes peering down at the water. She was too ashamed to look into any of her friends' eyes. They had been telling her about this for months too, and she had been denying it all this time. "He was done chasing after me. Remus was right."
"What'd Remus say?" Dorcas asked.
"I've been pulling James on an emotional leash," she said, sheepishly.
Marlene sighed and leaned on the wall besides Lily. "Well, he isn't wrong. And nor is James."
"I messed up," Lily repeated.
"Yeah, you did," Marlene said, leaning her head onto Lily's soft shoulder. "He still would pick you over Camilla though."
This caused the four girls to smile, all except Lily. She simply sighed, "I'm not ruining their relationship for the sake of my happiness. That's childish, selfish… and anything else with -ish in it!"
Marlene scoffed, "There is only so much relationship to ruin though."
Lily slapshed Marlene with water and laughed, "I'm not a Homewrecker, Marlene McKinnon."
"But homewrecking is so much fun," Marlene smirked devilishly. "Especially when the home never had a foundation."
Remus Lupin was a wreck. He sat alone in the Shreiking Shack with nothing but his thoughts to keep him company. He had his head in between his legs and focused on the skewed wood planks. Poppy brought him a radio, which he appreciated. Some transitions would be easier if he could focus on something else. Since this night, there was nothing particularly interesting on the radio, he had to make do with his own memories.
First, he thought of his mum. He tried to smell the tea she'd make for him at home during the full moon. He thought of her soft voice when she'd laugh at one his Marauder pranks. And, he thought of how sick she was.
Next thought. He thought of finals. James and Sirius had been helping him with studies during the last full moons. Peter would cheer him on as always. Sixth year really brought about a new side to the professors, and Remus was unsure that he could keep up. How could professors expect sixteen year-olds to balance school work and a social life with mountains and mountains of homework?
Well, Remus was seventeen now. His mum told him that he was born in the afternoon, around 4:20pm. So, he was officially seventeen now. He was legal; he could drink, buy magical lotto tickets, and apparate when he obtained his license. He should be celebrating with Firewhiskey and Butterbeers, not alone in a shack.
Actually, fuck the alcohol. He wanted to get belligerently stoned and be in bed. With Dorcas Meadowes actually. Oh, he enjoyed this thought. It actually dulled the pain, so he went along with it.
Remus imagined them entirely naked in a large King bed, maybe inside of the Room of Requirement. He thought of shagging her until the sun came up, in a multitude of positions. He imagined what her moans would sound like: breathy and long. He pictured her plump lips open and begging for air and him. He even smiled at the thought of her orgasm.
"Fuck," he groaned as he felt his body shift, snapping him out of his lovely daydream.
Remus could no longer hold off the transition. He had been trying to do so for the last hour, and the time had come. His bones began cracking and contorting in ways that would remind one of the circus. He let out a vicious roar as claws began poking through nails. His limbs stretched, and his teeth sharpened. It felt like hell was breaking loss in his bones - everything was burning. After the fire in his bones went out, the ashes created something new.
The Werewolf let out a long howl, loud and high. If one were too close, it could possibly make ears bleed. It scratched through the wood, and some residents in the village of Hogsmeade could even hear the painful noise. The Werewolf wanted to rip and shred the shack apart, tear it into pieces with his own teeth. He wanted to be set free.
After minutes, or maybe even hours, of banging against the wall, the Werewolf heard a noise. It was a loud bark from what seemed like the lower level of the shack. The wolf moved to a corner, bending at the knees into a predatory position.
The door opened slightly, but no one was there. The wolf growled at the sight of a small chubby rat, peeking its head into the room. He was about to pounce at it, but it skittered away. The wolf followed the rodent, still cautious of its large movements and moved down the stairs sloppily. The rat skittered outside through the creaked open door. The wolf used its snout to poke through and make a larger entrance.
Outside, in the cool March night, stood an unlikely trio: a large stag, a scraggly black dog, and the rat. Instead of having an urge to kill these mammals, the wolf felt an overwhelming sense of relief. The wolf did not know why, but it felt better having these three around.
The dog barked again and bent down for the rat to climb onto its head. The dog and rat followed the stag further into the woods. With its enhanced vision, the wolf could see a large glowing light further into the woods. It looked like a bonfire.
Although Remus Lupin would not be to entirely able remember his birthday night as a lycanthrope, his best mates would. They would fill him on all the details that his instincts would force him to forget.
Speaking of instincts, it really felt like someone was watching the motley crew of animals. The wolf turned his head back before following his mammalian friends and heard nothing but a rustle in the bushes. Perhaps, it was nothing but another lurking animal.
A/N - To make up for three weeks of ghosting, I decided to add another chapter as soon as it was ready. If it suits you, please review, favorite, or follow, they do mean a lot! Let me know what you think.
Thanks for reading,
Rose