Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin does not belong to me.

A little hard to get: Chapter Seven

Misao circled the weapons room, taking slow steps as her eyes scanned the place. It wasn't so much of a room as it was a shed at the rear of the Aoiya. Hardly anyone entered it anymore. It was a new age, a time where violence seemed to be a word on the verge of extinction.

She was born during a time of turmoil, moved from one place to another as a child for her protection. It was hard to imagine how peaceful life could be. How things could be… normal. But it really was.

But even in normalcy, death will eventually find its way, and sadness is felt even more distinctly when everything has found its balance. It is more prominent, and all the more striking and painful.

It had been a month since Okina had died and while it had been incredibly hard for the first few weeks, she felt the pain of his passing lessen a little every day. But once in a while, the grief would hit her hard and she would find herself seeking solace in the weapons room, as ironic as it sounded.

Misao felt each weapon beneath her fingertips as she past them, allowing memories to sink in, until she reached a pair of tonfa. They weren't his. But they reminded her of him, and it made her heart ache to remember.

"He would have made a better leader than I ever was."

She didn't need to turn around to figure out who it was. It had been three years since she had last since him. Since the night he walked away from her. Still, it was the one voice she'd long to hear everyday – the one she wanted to hear first thing in the morning, and the last thing at night.

That night, however, she really didn't want it. Not now, and not in the state that she was in.

"What are you doing here."

It wasn't a question, despite the slight tremble of uncertainty it let off. It was a demand, and not one that required an answer. Aoshi knew this, but he acted as though he didn't notice, the way he usually did around Misao.

"To see how you were doing." He said in his usual quiet manner.

"I'm fine." She answered a little too quickly.

"You don't have to pretend, not in front of me."

"I'm not."

Of course she was. She knew it, and she was also aware that he knew it too. She refused to look at him. Her tear-etched face would only confirm that she was a little too broken for her liking. It was a fresh kind of brokenness, and for once, one that he wasn't responsible for.

She had imagined her first meeting with him so many times, how she would give him a piece of her mind, or that she would treat him as though she didn't know him. Or add a little kunai to the mix. But she never prepared for the fact that he would appear at a time when she was most vulnerable. It certainly wasn't in the cards.

"Misao," Aoshi said calmly. "Take a walk with me."

"I don't want to."

She felt a small tear run down the side of her cheek as she spoke. Her defiance was just part of a childish plot to prevent him from seeing her cry. After all, she couldn't let him see her that way, not when she was supposed to be hating him. It was the only feeling she could hold onto at the moment that made her feel strong.

Despite her reluctance, Aoshi took her hand gently in his and led her out the door.

"It's not going to hurt more if you do, I promise."

She attempted to pull her hand away from his, but eventually relented to his suggestion. They walked into the courtyard, saying nothing for a while until Aoshi ended the silence between them - a rare act of his.

"Do you remember the day your grandfather died?" He asked, his eyes looking down at his shoes as he walked.

His shoes were new, and so was his charcoal black suit. He missed his training outfit, and understood how Misao felt every time she was made to wear a kimono as a child. And yet, here she was too, wearing a dark blue kimono with cherry blossoms stitched on her sleeves and hem – like a fish out of water.

"I thought you said it wasn't going to hurt more." Misao said bitterly.

Ignoring her sarcasm, Aoshi continued, "I remembered seeing your face, as the procession passed. You were devastated, but there wasn't a single tear, and I wondered how someone so little could be so brave."

"You've been in battle so many times. Surely bravery is not some kind of new construct to you."

She had her guard up even though she knew he wasn't there to hurt her. If anything, he was there to bring her comfort. He was very capable of doing so. But that was the thing; she didn't want to feel anything but grief. It wouldn't have been fair to Okina if she allowed herself to feel the slightest happiness at his absence.

"It's not courage when you don't fear death." He told her. "I wasn't being brave when I decided to avenge our friends. I was scared, and I took it out on all the people who cared about me, especially you."

Misao considered his words quietly. She hadn't heard him talk about the death of their friends in that manner. It seemed to be a verboten topic for him, but here he was, bringing up his own pain to defuse hers. It reminded her of why she loved him. When he wasn't being psychotically evil, he was capable of incredible empathy, even if he did show it in the uncanniest of ways.

"But you're nothing like me Misao. You're strong and it's become even more apparent now that you're no longer a child." He said.

No, she didn't want to give him any credit. She didn't want to hear the words he was using to soften her heart.

"Why did you come back?" She said quickly, trying to change the subject.

"You were there for me when I needed you."

"It's not a favour you're required to return."

"No, it isn't. But I'm here for the same reason you were there for me."

Misao looked up at him for the first time that evening. Could it be? Was he trying to tell her that he loved her in that subtle way of his? Because that was exactly how it sounded to her. But she couldn't read him, not very well at least. There was little emotion in the way he said it. He made it seem like it was just a passing statement, a matter of fact. And his face, as usual, expressionless.

"I suppose you know that I didn't marry Kai." She said, unsure of why she even mentioned her failed engagement as a means to change the subject. It was an engagement she didn't want, but tried very hard to accept.

They had been walking aimlessly around the Aoiya until they were finally standing outside her room. Perhaps she was more tired than she had realised and her legs led her there subconsciously. Perhaps it was more than that. Perhaps her heart was tired too.

"I do." He responded quietly. "I'm sure you know where I've been too."

"You weren't exactly hiding when you took up that intelligence job for the government." She said, motioning to his suit.

"No, I wasn't."

"I hated you for a long time. More for that than anything else you ever did to hurt me." She told him, turning to face him, her back against the door. "You were right there, in plain sight. You didn't even bother to leave Kyoto."

"I was planning to leave, but I couldn't. Not after I heard you didn't get married." He said, taking a step forward, narrowing the gap between them. "But yes, you have every right to hate me."

He had made a terrible mistake, trying to be the bigger man and offering her to someone else as though he owned her. He'd convinced himself that it was the right thing to do, that he didn't deserve her, not after everything he had done to hurt her.

But somehow, it was more than that. To say that she didn't belong to him sounded wrong. Right from the moment she entered into his life, she was his. Even the thought that some other man could have her made his blood grow hot. He didn't want anybody to touch her but him, and he didn't realise how strong his sentiments were for her until she agreed to marry Kai. Jealousy wasn't exactly a feeling he was accustomed to, nor cared to admit he was capable of.

He wasn't about to make the same mistake again. He couldn't lose her and he couldn't leave. Not now, not ever.

"I haven't decided if I still do." She said, staring boldly into his eyes.

He tore away from her intense gaze and whispered in her ear. "You should hate me."

Slowly, he pressed his lips lightly against her neck. They made their way up, and with each kiss, he gave her a reason to hate him. For everything he did to her, for pretending not to care, for giving her away, for every cruel word he had said.

Finally he let his lips touch hers, and she could feel them quivering as he pulled away. "You should hate me for every step I took walking away from you."

His dark blue eyes met her bright blue ones. She wasn't able to stop her tears this time, and she couldn't hide them from him either. But it didn't matter. At that point, all that mattered was that he was there with her, loving her in his own mysteriously affectionate way. Whatever tears she had, they weren't just the grievous ones she held back. They fell fiercely with tears of comfort and joy - a strange concoction, yet not uninvited.

Her fingers reached up, feeling the warmth of his cheeks. She wasn't anywhere near his neck but she could already feel his pulse racing uncontrollably. He could hide most things from her with his face, but he couldn't hide the speed in which his heart was pounding when she touched him. He didn't need to tell her how he felt; he let her find out for herself as she interrogated him with her hands.

And when her hands revealed to her heart all that she needed to know, she slid the door open behind her and led him in, helping him slip off his jacket as she did so. Her hands moved slowly, tenderly as she unbuttoned his shirt. His scarred body would have frightened many women, but not her. She was never one to judge someone by their appearance. Or their past.

"I should have married Kai, just to spite you." She said, as he pushed her up against the wall at the corner of her room. "But I couldn't do that to someone good like him."

With one hand, Aoshi entangled his fingers in her hair, the other running down her thigh and grabbing as much of her Kimono as he could. When the hem seemed an eternity away, he couldn't resist ripping the material off her body as though it were the thinnest of paper. Instinctively, she jumped up and wrapped both legs around his hips as he pressed up against her, all the while not allowing a single breath escape from between their lips.

When they finally parted, she let out a quiet but sincere laugh, one she hadn't permitted herself to do in a long time. He loved her laugh. It sounded like the beginning of spring to him, when the sun would come out of hiding and everything was warm.

For a while, they sat side by side in their little corner and said nothing, her head resting on the side of his arm, his hand still holding onto hers. He allowed a few minutes to pass before, once again, interrupting their silence.

"Perhaps you deserve someone horrible to marry out of spite for." He said softly as he turned to look at her.

Misao brushed his dark bangs away and sighed happily when she saw the tiniest of smiles on his face. And, for the first time, the indescribable joy in his eyes.

Finally.

"Do you know anyone like that?"

-FIN-

Author's notes: Hi! Sorry for the long wait and that I killed off Okina. OMG, I know right, six years since it started! But I couldn't think of a way to end. Writer's block sucks. In any case, I hope you enjoyed this. Peace out.