A FRIEND IN NEED
Mariyah entered the bedroom before Hannibal and sat on the edge of the bed nervously smoothing her hands over the luxurious down comforter. Tugging and twisting the neatly turned tassels on the matching pillows she tested her resolve and found herself equal to the task.
You go home tomorrow. It has to be tonight.
Suddenly she reached for the hem of her garment.
Hannibal quickly followed and without attending at all to what the young woman was doing moved with purpose directly to the telescope. His eyes did not shift to her though he could see everything Mariyah was doing.
She is removing her sweater.
He held the breath he was about to exhale several seconds until the dread left him. Thankfully she had another shirt beneath.
I know you find this entertaining but I am not amused, Clarice.
Moving toward the french doors leading to the balcony with the haste of a man in need of an escape route Hannibal threw them open, stood before the easement and breathed deeply. It was a warm, musty spring-like night and though the sky was clear, there was a hint of pending rain in the air reminding him of Florence.
A quick stroll through his memory brought him back to that place. He could feel the rubber twisting in his hands as he fashioned a noose from the power cord. He remembered slipping it over the head of the traitor as his quickly, though carefully made plan fell into place.
To make the moment even more consequential and momentous in his mind, Clarice had called. It was as close to a perfect death as he had ever designed. The remembrance of the event caused his lips to curl into a devious smile wishing he had Rinaldo Pazzi to toss over the rail once again. Though the Sardinian's were in pursuit and death chased him at every turn it was preferable to this situation. That was a challenge. That was exhilarating. This was frustration in the extreme.
Thank god the baby is a boy. I don't think I'm ready to deal with the challenges of a girl. Not yet anyway.
The doors now opened, Hannibal lifted the large mounted telescope along with the tripod and carried it onto the balcony.
After setting up and briefly testing the equipment Hannibal sat on one of the wicker chairs placed by Clarice and called to Mariyah. "If you would like to participate, I can show you how to use the settings to find constellations and individual stars."
Mariyah sat in the chair beside Hannibal holding herself in comfort and cold answering coyly, "I'd rather just look. I'm sure you know a lot about this sort of thing. It looks very delicate and I wouldn't want to break it."
Relieved that Mariyah had little interest in the process itself, Hannibal believed after a brief conversation, it might be possible to delicately extricate from the situation. He attempted to keep his cadence very even and removed every shred of emotive tone. He would not lead the conversation toward anything personal but would instead allow Mariyah to direct. Hannibal would follow the topic of her choice at whatever pace the young lady set.
By your scent I know what is in your heart, now let us see what you have on your mind.
Though Hannibal's body language was relaxed his posture remained perfectly perpendicular as he turned toward Mariyah and offered, "There are several celestial bodies that are quite prominent during the month of March. Shall I make a suggestion?"
Mariyah settled into her chair and scooted it quickly along the ground toward the object of her desire in order that the arm of her chair touched Hannibal's chair. She leaned into his body and tipped her head slightly that it might rest gently against his arm. Hannibal did not react to her proximity though he could clearly sense the changes in hers.
This may prove to be quite the challenge indeed.
Now settled, she breathed deeply and attempted to memorize the feel of his body against hers and the smell of his cologne.
He's perfect…he's just perfect.
Feeling relaxed in his presence and brimming with the anticipation of what her boldness might bring she responded, "Yes, that would be lovely thank you."
Hannibal quickly began to manipulate the settings on the telescope as he narrated his progress.
"Right ascension 9.68 hours, declination -47.45, Suhail al Muhlif, it is a star in the constellation Vela, the sail from Argo Navis."
Mariyah continued to engage him in conversation as she hung on his every word. "What is Argo Navis?"
"It refers to the ship from the tales of Jason and the Argonauts. We would have much better viewing if we were south of latitude 33 degrees, but being that we are approximately 39 degrees 29 north, though not optimum, it is visible. Do you know the translation for the name?"
"Is that Arabic? Does it mean gem of the skies?"
"Yes, it is ancient Arabic meaning the spectral gem of the southern skies. Would you like to have a look? It is quite lovely."
Smiling widely she answered, "I would like that very much."
Mariyah stood in front of the telescope, bent to the eyepiece and staring out at the star listened intently for Hannibal's description.
Hannibal watched her carefully, assessing her responses. Based on her respirations he could tell that her heart rate was elevating. Pheromones flowed freely, but not between them as there was no exchange on his part. He continued, business-like in his presentation.
"This particular constellation has many double stars that can be easily seen with binoculars. You would have no need for a telescope. Are you interested in astronomy?"
"I like to look at the stars but it's more for the romantic nature of them than any interest in the science of astronomy."
She scuffed a foot along the ground obviously anxious and having something bubbling just beneath the surface. It was obviously something important to her, though she seemed hesitant to articulate.
"There is something you would like to say, yes?"
"Yes, Doctor Lecter."
"Yet you hesitate. You need not. There is nothing you can say to me that would change my feelings for you. Please trust that I am your friend and as such, there is nothing you cannot express."
Finally, Mariyah, eyes wide, took a deep breath, gathered her courage and exhaled her relief as she spoke the question, "Can I be really honest with you, Doctor Lecter?"
The hairs on the back of his neck stood. The question was packed with a combination of innocence and anticipation. He spoke quietly, "Yes, please, I would very much appreciate your honesty."
Mariyah glanced over her shoulder and turned her dark eyes up at the sky as if the answers to all of her life's questions were written in the stars.
Hannibal admired her as she pulled the elastic from her pony tail and shook her head from side to side loosening the dark brown hair, thick with the curls of her ancestors, cascading down her back.
Her heart is strong and her mind is sound. She is a lovely and worthy young woman. How courageous.
She didn't shift her head as she stood in front of the man she loved; the man someone else loved as well. Hannibal Lecter was a god in her eyes.
She turned her face to the heavens for courage, her voice strong as she spoke her heart. "Even though I know there is a time difference between our countries I would very often look at the stars at night and wonder if you were looking up at them too. It made me feel as close to you then, as I am now."
Hannibal was touched by the gentle and loving nature of her comment and supported her feelings even as he redirected them, "Good friends often share that kind of bond. I am very proud you consider me a friend."
Mariyah turned to face him thrilled not to have been rejected out of turn. "Did you and Clarice start off as friends?"
Hannibal smiled at the question.
She is both perceptive and persistent. Yes, quite impressive.
"Not as such. No. It was much more of a mentoring relationship as she was much younger than I at the time of our first meeting. She had yet to come into her own."
My lioness was yet a cub.
Her voice hopeful, "Was it kind of like we are now?"
Hannibal knew he should not reinforce that thought. Again the slightest shift in perception would be needed.
"Though I am older than Clarice, I am much older than you are Mariyah, and though she was a student, keep in mind that she was already working with the FBI and was finishing her degree. That would make her then a few years older than you are now as you are just embarking on your education, are you not?"
"I'm a freshman, yes, but that's only a difference of three or four years."
Hannibal needed to illustrate the differences between Mariyah and Clarice in relation to him without making her feel less than. He proceeded with as much sensitivity as possible.
"When you consider the span of a human life, some years are more important developmentally than others. For example, I am very much the same man I was four years ago. That span of time has altered me somewhat, though not decidedly so. The same amount of relative time passed from my first to my fifth birthday yet developmentally much occurred. You are undergoing a similarly important transformation as you are just now moving from adolescence to adulthood. These next four years are very important as you will evolve in ways you are just beginning to understand. What you want now, you may not want in four years."
Mariyah was only slightly defensive. She looked away for a moment, gathering her thoughts as clouds gather before a storm and when she turned and met his eyes she spoke with a conviction not present in her voice moments before.
"I already know what I want. I know what I want my future to be."
Though she seemed resolute, Hannibal had successfully shaped a question in her mind. He could see it forming and thus added to its armature.
"That may change. Don't forget that you have recently experienced a very traumatic event. You are still experiencing many varied responses. Now is not the time to make major life decisions. You need time to heal."
Mariyah reached for Hannibal and grasped his shoulders and shook him as if attempting to wake something within. "I need you to heal."
He allowed the intrusion into his personal space but kept her at the arm's length she established.
"I am always here for you, Mariyah. I am your friend now. I will continue to be your friend."
"I can't tell you how happy that makes me." Mariyah stood in front of Hannibal holding his shoulders and searching his eyes.
Hannibal intentionally slowed his heart rate and waited for her next move, though he did not look forward to it.
Suddenly his sense of smell told him he had reason to be concerned, though it had nothing to do with Mariyah.
I thought there would be more time. This I did not need.
Mariyah took two hesitant steps in Hannibal's direction. He sat very still, not wanting to encourage or discourage additional physical contact as he understood this young lady had recently experienced trauma. She had been used by a deviant and Hannibal did not wish her to begin seeing men as dominant forces seeking her for sexual satisfaction.
Hannibal felt that Mariyah needed to connect love and care with future relationships and as he was the object of her affection he needed to proceed with caution. His goal was to guide her through this process without leaving her feeling rejected.
Still, there remains the additional concern I hope will not come into play. I will continue and trust that you handled this, Clarice. I know you would not leave me in this precarious a position. Trust…I trust you, Clarice.
He gathered himself and closed his eyes as Mariyah approached him.
The young woman closed the space between them, slipped her hands from his shoulders sliding them under his arms, and began to smooth them up and down his back. She sat on his left thigh curling her body against him as she embraced him and rested her head on his chest.
I can hear him breathe. I can feel his heart beating. He is perfect. This moment is perfect.
Hannibal's heart rate remained steady and unyielding as he felt the heat emanating from her small frame. She was very similar in body type to Clarice, though his wife had a wiry strength not present in Mariyah who was waifish in her build and whose ribs could be felt through her back.
She has not regained all of the weight lost in Stuart's company. There is additional healing to be done.
His body stiffened though not in the way Mariyah might have erroneously convinced herself she would prefer. Knowing this was a delicate situation and being concerned with Mariyah's mental health, Hannibal allowed the contact though he was careful not to escalate or entice it. He placed his hands on her shoulder blades and held her very gently for a moment.
As Hannibal spoke, he was careful that his voice be not only non-threatening but that it carry into the next room, "Mariyah, what are your feelings about me? What are your thoughts?"
She spoke against his chest, hiding her face, "I…I don't want to say."
Hannibal leaned back and lifted her chin so that he could look into her eyes, "Do you not you trust me?"
She looked up, her eyes vulnerable and filled with hope, "Yes…I trust you more than I've ever trusted anyone."
Hannibal continued to hold her and speak in a level that remained steady and calm, "You say that you trust me and yet there is something you do not wish to share with me?"
Mariyah shifted uncomfortably as she began to lend voice to her emotions. "You don't understand. Sharing with you isn't the problem."
Hannibal continued to support her with his voice and with his body language as he held her gently, "What is the problem? I would like to help if I can. What won't you share with me?"
She lifted her head, boldly took his eyes within her own and stated, "There isn't a thing I won't share with you."
The direct nature of the statement gave Hannibal pause though his demeanor remained unchanged. His nostrils flared. He ignored the pheromones and searched for the additional stimuli hoping the suggestive nature of the statement had not aroused a reaction.
There is no additional movement. Thank you, Clarice.
Hannibal gently pursued. "Could you be more specific?"
She snuggled against him and climbed further into his lap. "I think I love you and because we're friends it upsets me."
Hannibal was careful to maintain full control of his physiology to insure this more intensive contact against his groin did not generate an autonomic response. He continued his fatherly tone.
"While I do not doubt you feel love for me, love can take many forms, Mariyah. There is no shame in loving a person and therefore no need for upset. For example, as you pointed out, we are friends and friends can have a special bond and a very deep love for one another. Do you like Clarice? Is she your friend as well?"
Mariyah lifted her face from Hannibal's chest in order to look into his eyes. She wanted desperately to convince him of her feelings for Clarice.
"Yes, I hope she's my friend. I would love to be exactly like her. Yes…I like her. I like her very, very much. Do you believe me? It's really, really, important that you believe me."
Hannibal was curious as to why that particular point seemed of such import. He stored it and nodded, "Yes, I believe that you have very strong feelings for Clarice. Of course you must know that I do as well. I love her very much and as such I could never hurt her in any way."
"I don't want to hurt her and I don't want you to hurt her either…I really don't."
Hannibal pulled her close for a moment to illustrate his arms encircling her body. "Do you think she would be upset if she saw me holding you in this way?"
A quizzical looked crossed her face, "I don't know why she would be."
Hannibal shifted to see her face more clearly, "If you and I were married, and I held another woman in my arms. If another woman held me in this way, would it cause distress?"
Mariyah was getting to the heart of her desire and approached the subject with caution.
"If she was a total stranger to me I would be upset but I wouldn't be upset if she was…"
She stopped abruptly.
Whatever she is about to say, it is important.
Hannibal sensed they had reached the crux of the situation and sought clarity, "You were about to make a statement and stopped. Please continue, this is very important… if she were what, Mariyah?"
Mariyah spoke just above a whisper, "…if she was your second wife."
This will hurt her.
Hannibal was touched by the honesty and kissed the tops of Mariyah's hands as he explained, "Mariyah, my wife is mere weeks away from delivering my first born son. I waited a decade and sacrificed much to be worthy of Clarice. I love her very much and would never consider a divorce. There is no possibility that I will ever have a second wife."
The statement caused concern for Mariyah. She had only connected her feelings for Hannibal to Clarice's feelings on the most basic of levels. She reluctantly released Hannibal, stood and moved to the rail of the balcony. She sighed deeply as she looked out at the night sky.
He doesn't understand.
Mariyah turned suddenly and leaned backward against the railing of the balcony for support. She spoke quickly as if the momentum of the sentences would carry her courage to the end.
"I didn't say you should divorce Clarice, I love Clarice. I wouldn't want to hurt her at all and I understand that you love her and the she deserves respect. I thought that maybe she could be your First and I could be your Second. We could both be your wives. Very affluent men in Egypt still have that option. You are a very affluent man and you wouldn't have to worry about Clarice because I could help her with the baby and learn from her. She likes me, I know she does. I think we would all be very happy together."
As it was a much more secular country than its other African neighbors, Hannibal hadn't thought to consider that polygyny might have remained legal in Egypt.
Hannibal stood and joined the young girl at the rail. He hugged Mariyah tightly for a moment reached for one of her hands and kissed it very tenderly.
"Mariyah, it is very sweet of you to think of me in that way, and I am so honored that you would consider me worthy of your love but when I married Clarice, on that day, I promised myself to her and to her alone. Please know how much I care for you and know how so sorry I am if the knowledge of that upsets you."
"It does upset me… a lot."
Again, he held her against him. The hug was one of comfort and concern. There was no hint of sexuality on his end.
"That is distressful to me as the last thing I wish to do is to hurt you. You have become very important to me and I want you to understand that my feelings for you have not diminished. One day you will meet a young man you truly love and he will promise himself to you. You deserve not to be someone's second. You deserve to be their one and only."
Embarrassed by what she was about to say, she again spoke against his chest squeezing his body to extract some measure of strength from him.
"I've never been with anyone. I wanted you to…I wanted it to be you. I still want it to be you."
Hannibal again searched the air for either movement or the threat of anger.
If there is no reaction after that comment, it is probably under control.
"Mariyah, you have been through a very traumatic event and were more than fortunate to escape that situation with your chastity intact. Now is not the time to make that decision. Please, promise me that you will offer that gift to someone who truly deserves the honor."
There was a yearning in her voice, yet it seemed strangely non-sexual. The need was for closeness, not for sexual release, though Mariyah would have argued that point.
"You saved me. You deserve the honor."
Hannibal persisted, "I don't, Mariyah. I don't deserve it because I cannot give myself to you mind, body and soul. Do you understand that you deserve better than that? You must make the young man of your choosing earn this gift. Especially in your culture, this is not something to be taken lightly."
Mariyah conceded, "Are you mad at me…are we still friends?"
Warmth flooded his voice, "Yes. We are still friends and as your friend, I will love you and honor you always. If you ever have need of me you need only ask. I will be forever in your debt."
Mariyah nodded. Hannibal could see she was cold and wanted to bring her indoors but hesitated as the scent in the next room was still present. He thought it best to announce his intention.
"I believe we have enjoyed the stars long enough. You appear cold. Perhaps we should go inside?"
He paused before guiding her in through the doors and searched the air for information.
Gone.
Hannibal escorted Mariyah through the doors and carried the telescope into the room. As he set it up Mariyah sat on the bed and spoke softly.
"Would you mind if I went to bed, Doctor Lecter? I'm really tired."
Hannibal understood, "Not at all, Mariyah. If you need anything, let me know."
He kissed the top of her head.
Mariyah reached up and hugged him. "Do you really love me…Even after I said all of those things?"
"Yes, Mariyah, I love you still. Sleep well my dear friend."
Hannibal left Mariyah smiling.
He loves me.
As Hannibal exited the bedroom and entered the hallway he immediately turned to the left to address the source of his concern. There, standing just outside the door was Anwar Bashandi.
"You are a gentleman and a true friend. Thank you, Doctor Lecter. Thank you."
Hannibal nodded an acknowledgement as words were not needed. He then turned and headed to his bedroom suite slapped the latch and swung the door open.
Clarice, now feeling just a bit uneasy pushed herself up against the headboard for support.
Hannibal Lecter, fresh from a very uncomfortable situation with a lovesick teenager stood at the foot of his bed and glared at his wife as he hissed his approach. "Well hello, Clariiice."
Until the next chapter my friends!
LH