~ooO (4) A Maturing Relationship Ooo~

Naruto was smelly, dirty, pleasantly exhausted and very satisfied with himself. The five-day, no-supplies, survival trip turned out to be an extended camping trip, not the terrifying experience his overactive imagination had conjured. The isolation had given the teen exactly what he needed to work through his fears: time and space. With his developing skills in wandless magic wilderness survival without a wand was not a serious concern—what he could not catch or scavenge, he could create.

He desperately wanted a long luxurious hot soak but had to settle for a fast shower. Itachi said he would be back for the evening meal and Naruto wanted to prepare a proper meal for them. The teen had cooked often enough at the orphanage, so he didn't have to concentrate very hard as he set the rice to cook and salmon to grill before preparing vegetable tempura and miso soup. By the time the rice and salmon were ready the tempura and miso soup were also done. He set about making nori onigiri for Itachi and salmon onigiri for himself. Just as Naruto finished shaping the last ball, he felt the wards 'trip'. Itachi was back.

Naruto had played ostrich long enough. The isolation had given the teen enough time to think on his situation and to make choices in regards to his personal life. He had accepted he was in love—the real thing—with Itachi and that he wanted a relationship with him. Now Naruto needed to take the first firm step on a path towards that end. If Itachi wanted the same thing from Naruto. Naruto was not certain if he was brave enough to chase Itachi if he wasn't interested.

~o~

Itachi was very surprised by the hot, homemade meal awaiting him. Truthfully, he had expected Naruto to dawdle and extend his survival trip for a few days. To avoid Itachi. The older wizard wondered what had happened to cause the change.

Itachi was quiet as he sat down at the kitchen table. Then he blinked seeing what Naruto was setting out: Nori onigiri. He looked up with sharp eyes. Why would Naruto have made Itachi's favourite food? "Naruto?"

"I wanted to make something for you," the younger male confessed. "I was a bit of a brat, running and hiding from you. Very immature."

Itachi took note of Naruto's warm blue eyes meeting his unflinchingly. He meant what he just said. And from the slightly shy look and faint blush…Itachi struggled not to let his personal desires taint his perceptions.

"I agree we do have a lot to discuss. But let's save that for after the meal you prepared," Itachi murmured.

And with that the conversation turned to lighter matters. Itachi confirmed he had made contact with three other Duel Masters with apprentices, to give Naruto some experience fighting opponents of varying skill sets and experience levels. After the meal was finished, Itachi helped put away the dishes and start the cleaning and drying charms while Naruto brewed and poured out cups of jasmine flavoured green tea. They resumed their seats at the kitchen table sipping the fragrant hot liquid in silence. Then Itachi spoke.

"Before we discuss us I need to tell you something."

Naruto blinked surprised. "What?"

"Naruto, do you remember Konoha? The Hidden Village of Hi no Kuni? The shinobis there have a leader called Hokage and they use chakra to cast jutsus, something very similar to wandless spells?"

Naruto inhaled sharply clearly taken aback by the topic. How did Itachi know? Naruto had never told him anything about that!

Itachi saw the surprise and reserve. He could see Naruto retreating, drawing behind walls and defences. This was the reason why he had circumvented this topic for so long, to avoid stirring up bad memories. He poured more tea for himself before continuing.

"They are real. I know because I came from that world. Like you. In fact we arrived in this world at the same time. Together."

That put a crack in the wall. "It's real?" Naruto asked hesitantly.

Itachi nodded. "Very."

Naruto frowned. "Wait a sec, if you know and we came together…why don't I remember you? And why did you leave me? Why did I go to the orphanage? And you didn't contact me! You didn't say anything all this time!" Naruto was growing angrier with each question.

Itachi inhaled sharply. "I didn't want to, but I had few options," Itachi confessed. "You needed treatment and healing. And if I stayed the Healers and Aurors would have wanted explanations about what happened, what our relationship was, my own background. At the time I had no resources or local contacts. It was safer to leave you in the hospital and let the local authorities look after you. I did stop by the orphanage to make sure you were settling in without too much difficulty." He smiled slightly. "I managed to sneak in and copy your files. You did the smart thing, not fighting with the Healers."

Naruto blushed. "I didn't know what was going on," he confessed. "For a while I thought I was trapped in some weird dream. Or a genjutsu. It took weeks before I accepted it was real and not a dream." Then he frowned. "How did we get here? Some of my dreams were really weird. Something about a bijuu and the Yondaime?" His eyes widened. "You were there!"

Itachi nodded. "Yes I was. It was almost ten years ago, so I'll tell you what happened, in case you have forgotten."

And then he set about giving Naruto a very compressed synopsis on many decades of history from the founding of Konoha to just before they left. The rivalry between the Senju and Uchiha clans. Uchiha Madara's intense hatred of the Shodaime, his clansmen who refused to side with him, and Konoha. The rumours of Madara's abilities to control the Kyuubi. The chakra beast attacking Konoha and being sealed by the Yondaime into a newborn baby, the Yondaime's own son. Itachi's vow to protect the Yondaime's legacy, the Kyuubi jinchuuriki, Uzumaki Naruto. The Uchiha clan's planned coup and Itachi's mission to stop it by killing the coup leaders, including his own father, and Madara killing off the rest of the clan for revenge. Accepting the mission to become a nuke-nin to infiltrate Akatsuki and feed information to Konoha's spymaster Jiraiya, Naruto's own godfather and the Yondaime's sensei. Akatsuki capturing Naruto much ahead of planned and extracting the bijuu for their own purposes. Itachi's desperate deal with the Kyuubi to twist the extraction seal into a transportation one. The bijuu had agreed because he would be freed and it would hinder Madara's plans.

"I did think about stealing you from the orphanage but in the end I decided not to. I had no resources in this world, no way to provide a stable environment for you. I was old enough with enough training to avoid the authorities but I had no proper documents to integrate into the non-Magical world. It was pure chance that I stumbled into someone using genjutsu, or what I thought was genjutsu. I captured and interrogated him and discovered the Magical enclaves. It was easier to slip in and create a background in the Magical world. It didn't hurt when I discovered I had the ability to use magic myself."

"But you didn't visit. Or tell me anything when we met again!" Naruto was hurt.

"I didn't want to uproot you. And if I approached you in the orphanage I would have to explain how I knew you. What I knew of your true past. That was not an option. It still isn't."

Naruto inhaled sharply. "It was a fluke I went to Tenshiro Academy. I was supposed to go to Mugen Academy."

Itachi shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I would have approached Mugen Academy to run advanced lessons on duelling or DMA. I would have arranged to meet you. Somehow."

Naruto shook his head in a daze. "Any more bombshells to drop on me?" he asked jokingly. To his unease Itachi's expression turned more sombre before he rose and vanished out of the kitchen. A few minutes later he returned with a very familiar leather bound volume. "Hey! That's mine!" he cried out, irate at the infringement on his privacy.

Itachi shook his head. "No. This is mine. Go and get your own one."

Flushed with righteous ire Naruto ran to his own room and threw open his trunk. And froze seeing a familiar volume lying on top of his books. But? How? He grabbed the book and ran back to Itachi who was sitting at the kitchen table with his own journal open and an expensive uncapped fountain pen poised over a blank page. As Naruto sat down at the table Itachi began writing in his own journal.

Naruto flipped open the pages and watched with wide eyes as Itachi's neat script began appearing on the pages.

When I arrived in this world I had a small emergency stash of gems and gold coins carried in sealed scrolls. I could not take you with me but the orphanage always received a quarterly anonymous stipend. At first it was the gems, later it was money I stole from the Yakuza. I did visit at first but I stopped after I was caught by the house mother. I still can't believe a non-Magical could have snuck up on me, a trained ANBU captain. I strongly suspect Masaki Kaede has enough magical potential to detect what does not belong. And I did not belong.

I was shocked when she did not call for the police but asked me what I was doing there. I told her your parents were killed by Yakuza and I could not take you with me and protect you because I had too many ties in the gangs. She was sympathetic but insisted I not return, because it would draw attention. And she was right because it was true.

I worked as an assassin and bodyguard the first few months after arriving in this world. My employers were not interested in my personal history, only my skills and reliability. Then one of my assigned targets turned out to be a Magical. I used Tsukiyomi to first interrogate then learn from him. Tsukiyomi is an advanced genjutsu only nins with active Sharingans can use. I spent a few months teaching myself from books and observation before transferring to Tenshiro as an older student. I didn't make many friends because I arrived the year before you started and was more interested in learning magic.

Naruto stared at Itachi, his teacher, his protector…Liar.

"How can I trust you?" the teen whispered. "How do I know you really mean what you say? That you aren't lying to me?"

Dark grey eyes met blue without flinching. "Do you remember what Watanabe-san told you about the journals? What to do when you first received it?"

Naruto frowned and thought hard. "Yeah. She told me to cut my finger and rub some blood into the engraving. So only I could open, read, and write in the journal." Blue eyes widened. "And she said the pages were truth-spelled."

"So is mine. It is the nature of linked-journals to have identical qualities." And then he began writing again.

I love you. I want you, your body, your mind, your spirit. And I'm not lying. I've been restraining myself ever since I first became your teacher. I want you because you are beautiful, powerful, and everything that is bright and good. But I cannot, do not, want to coerce you. It would break the vows I made to protect you. Because a caged bird always seeks to fly free. Because I want forever and I want the whole world to know what you mean to me, what we share.

Naruto shook his head and stood up abruptly, the chair dragging noisily over the tiled floor. It was too much. Just hours before he had pretty much convinced himself that his feelings for Itachi were one-sided, that Itachi did not feel anything for him. Then to hear it was not true, that Itachi felt the same, that he wanted Naruto.

"I'm sorry. I need to think about this. Everything."

And then he backed away, almost running out of the kitchen.

And Itachi watched him leave. He did not try to stop the younger wizard because he knew Naruto had to make the choice of his own free will. And whatever choice he made Itachi would have to accept it. Itachi refused to believe he might have destroyed the best thing in his life. A small selfish voice in his soul whispered 'you shouldn't have said anything,' but Itachi refused to listen to it. He refused to lie and allow a relationship to form and start with deception. Naruto was hurting and he might reject Itachi, but he would not remain like that forever. All hurts healed eventually. And even if Naruto balked, Itachi was not going to give up. If he remained persistent eventually Naruto would believe and accept Itachi's suit. And when he did Itachi would never let go. Because Naruto would be his and his alone.

~o~

Naruto did not know exactly how, but he found himself in the meadow behind the main building. He stood under the silvery light of the full moon staring up into the velvety dark night sky, eyes fixed on the brightest stars twinkling like tiny gems. He did not feel the tiny twigs and stones digging into his knees and shins as he fell to his knees, numb and shocky. He fell on his back and stared into the night sky dominated by the full moon.

Tsuki. Tsukiyomi. Itachi's genjutsu. Even the moon reminded Naruto of Itachi—mysterious, distant, brilliant, light, with a dark hidden side.

It was a while before his mind shifted gears and kick started his thought processes.

What he had thought was a hallucination was not. It was all real. Shinobis using jutsus fuelled by chakra were real. Konoha was real. If that part of his dreams were real the rest was too; the hateful fearful looks, being chased and beaten on more than one occasion, the barren loneliness of his apartment, living by himself because the orphanage matron had thrown him out into the cold.

Itachi had saved him from that isolated existence, from death. Sure he could be lying but Naruto doubted it. He could have easily not have said anything and allowed Naruto to go on believing Konoha was just a dream. How would Naruto know otherwise without some shred of proof? The only tangible evidence was the both of them, their lack of real records beyond a certain date. And Itachi was the one who had brought the topic up. His heart ached.

Itachi lied to me.

Naruto was no stranger to being hurt and betrayed, but being manipulated and used was something new. Naruto was not a genius, connected, or wealthy, in comparison to his fellow schoolmates. He had many casual friends but he was not one others hit on for anything beyond basic study notes. Naruto had not made his extra studies generally known. His year-mates knew he was in the top ten but the instructors kept the exact marks confidential to protect student privacy. No one knew he was the top student in more than one class.

Naruto stilled. The only reason why he was top student was because he followed Itachi's advice in First Year, because Itachi helped Naruto develop additional study plans to expand his personal knowledge. And then his conscience pointed out that Itachi had helped Naruto in other ways as well. He knew enough magic and had enough stealth training to break into the Orphanage records. He could easily confirm if Itachi's claims about being an anonymous donor were true or false. And if it were Itachi could have very easily have just left Naruto in the orphanage and forgotten about him. But he hadn't. He'd kept track of Naruto, supported the orphanage because Naruto was a resident, arranged for the sponsorship to Tenshiro, tutored in him his critical First Year, and returned to take him as an apprentice.

Feeling thoroughly confused, Naruto tried to focus on the sky. If he took the dreams as truths he could easily see the differences in the night sky, the constellations and stars were in completely different places and some from his birth world did not even exist in this. He surged up to sit hugging his knees, still looking up at the sky with a more thoughtful look.

Looking back was not his way. Naruto always preferred to live looking forward, not to the past. Itachi might have shaken Naruto's trust in him but hadn't he demonstrated some of his honesty by revealing the truth? By not allowing things to develop any further than they had and pretending Naruto's dreams were just that? He had simply chosen not to speak of certain things. And hadn't Naruto done the same by not talking to Itachi directly about his past? Even with Kage-san and Keiko-san he had had been more convinced they were just dreams, his subconscious trying to deal with memory gaps. He probably would have run if Itachi had tried to talk to him truthfully back in First Year. Hell, he still wanted to run despite being older and more sensible than a ten-year-old.

Naruto stayed in the meadow into the early hours of the morning when it began to drizzle. Reluctantly he got up and retreated back onto the covered wrap-around patio. Feeling calmer and having a general inkling on possible options, he re-entered the building and went to his room to sleep. He would talk to Itachi in the morning.

~ooOoo~ooOoo~ooOoo~

It had been a tense night for Itachi. He had stayed up his senses honed and hyper-aware of Naruto's every action. He knew how far he had walked out into the meadow, when he returned, and when he fell asleep. It was only after he sensed that did Itachi allow himself to relax and rest. Even so when he woke up his anxieties and doubts surged back to life. With very good reason.

"I'm sorry but I just can't…" Naruto stopped mid-sentence. That was not what he meant to say. "I mean I really like you but you just dropped a huge boulder on me. I need to deal with it first. And I don't want to start a relationship when I'm half-mad at you for lying to me."

Itachi's hands tightened fractionally around his cup of green tea. He forced his fingers to relax and loosen his grip.

"I did not lie," he stated carefully.

Naruto snorted. "It's called lying by omission and avoidance. I do it myself but you held back information that has a personal impact on me, information about my past." His expression was earnest, genuine. "Even though I'm hurt and mad I still love you and I want us to work. That's why I don't want to start anything until I'm calmer and ready for it."

Itachi inclined his head. There wasn't anything he could say to counter Naruto. He was right, he did have every right to feel hurt and betrayed. Hadn't Itachi felt the same way himself? When he discovered his clan's inclinations and plans for a political coup?

"I understand," he murmured. "When do you want to leave?"

Naruto frowned. "Leave? What do you mean?"

Itachi was surprised. "You said you needed to deal with your feelings. Aren't you going to leave? So you won't have to see me and be reminded?"

Naruto scowled. "Of course not! That's running away!" He reached across the dining table and squeezed Itachi's hand. "I'm not going anywhere Itachi." He smiled wryly. "You aren't getting rid of me that easily."

Hope fluttered to life in the older wizard's heart. "You…you aren't leaving?"

Naruto shook his head. "Nope. I don't want to leave and stew in my resentment. I want to work through and past this. Besides, I'm not giving up the chance of studying under a Battle Mage. Even if he is a secretive bastard," he added pointedly.

Itachi nodded slowly. "I'll try to be more open."

Naruto nodded firmly. "Good. You can start by at least writing to me if you're reluctant to talk." He smirked at Itachi's baffled expression. "The linked journals. Use them. Write to me." Itachi hesitated. "It doesn't have to be a lot. Just responses on what I write, at least. It took me a while to relax enough to write about things that worry me, things I hide from most people. It will help us get to know each other until you learn to open up and speak to me. Besides it's a good coping tool. Keiko-san said so." His expression turned a tad more vulnerable. "I'd like to read what you truly feel about things. It's hard to read you and you don't really speak about things that make you personally vulnerable." He twisted his fingers together. "I need some evidence that you aren't jerking me around, that you won't do a one-eighty and change your mind about me, that you still want me," he admitted.

Itachi nodded. "I will write in my journal. I might not write much, but I will write." And he was pleased to see Naruto accept the promise without question.

"Thank you."

~ooOoo~ooOoo~ooOoo~

TBC...