Gods, this fiction is long and hard to write—why did I even make it this complicated? I'm supposed to end this story in 35 chapters but with the current pace, I might extend. There are so many characters and a chapter is not enough to narrate their adventures. I'll try to squeeze everything together because I'm not sure I can put my whole attention on only this fiction. As you know, I have so many pending stories! I realized too that I like writing drama more than fighting scenes so I'm really sorry if I rushed the killings. Haha. Enjoy!

Nile: I'm so glad you liked the previous chapter. It took me a long long time to finish because I've been unsure on the emotional state of the characters. And yes! Yui and Nakago are finally together!

ThePinkMartini: Thanks! It took a lot of editing before I ended up with the published confrontation. I'm glad you liked it.

Khryztinne: Thanks for the review! I didn't get any response from you so I edited and posted this chappie! I'll send a new chapter for beta-ing soon. :)

AsongAvnuy: Thanks for your lengthy review! I'm trying my hardest to fight my inborn laziness and write this fiction. The update is finally here so I hope you'll enjoy reading this as much as the previous chappies.

Disclaimer: Fushigi Yuugi is not mine.

Wavering Hearts

By Slavedriver2008

THE MOUNTAINS THAT separated Hokkan and Kutou was a large expanse of land that no eye could measure. The mountains shielded Hokkan from conquerors and the army of the East found the territory hard to traverse. Led by Prince Hakei, the Kutou army nestled along the valley of the great mountain range, at the exact border between the two countries. If they had not been under the support of the estranged Prince of Hokkan, Temudan, they would have been detected by the Imperial Army.

In the midst of the blistering snow storm, Hakei's senses were starting to fail him. And doubts were beginning to fill his thoughts. They have been camped for months and there were still no news from Prince Temudan. The prince was supposed to give them the signal to attack and conquer Hokkan for him. Once the task had been done, he was supposed to slay him on the Throne Room. But the wariness on Hokkan's loyalty was only one part of the problem. The other, was Kutou itself.

The Emperor had not sent any messages. And the black-out made him uneasy. What was happening in the capital? Were the warriors still roaming freely or have they been captured? Has she been captured as well? He heaved a sigh, trying to relieve himself. No, if Yui were captured, one of his warriors would send word. And this would be his signal to return to the capital. He shook his head, willing the thoughts to disappear.

"Prince Hakei, we have a message from the Imperial Palace!" Hien arrived, kneeling before him. Hakei turned his horse and eyed the man.

"Who sent it?"

"It is from your sister, my Prince."

"Read," he ordered, looking out into the snow storm. It was unusual for Minako to send him a message. He had mixed feelings about the letter. What would his annoying sister tell him at this grave hour?

"My dear brother… Father—the Emperor—died due to a grave illness and before his death, he has given me the right to rule over Kutou due to your absence," the soldier read and Hakei turned, his handsome face, dejected.

"As for the warriors… Father issued an order before his death to annihilate them all, including the priestess. As of this writing, we have reports of possible deaths—and we expect the number to increase soon." Hakei's jaw clenched and he eyed the warrior who bowed lower.

"Also, as you have not been properly named as Crowned Prince, the ministers and I await your success in conquering Hokkan. Should you fail, necessary punishments would be given upon thee. We look forward to seeing your return with Hokkan's army behind you. Farewell, brother."

Hakei climbed down his horse and took the parchment, scanning it angrily. There was no mistake, it was Minako's handwriting. But to write such presumptuous words! He crumpled it and threw it on the snowy ground. He eyed his men, still heaving hard.

"What other news do we have from the capital?" he asked sternly.

"Garin, our spy, had been found decapitated outside the garrison," Hien said. "There were signs of torture but no one knew who was responsible for his death." The young warrior looked up to wait for his response but Hakei gave none. He was already very angry to react. "Our other spy fears his life and managed to send very few messages. But he did send troubling news."

"What could be more troubling than my father's death?" he asked, smirking and shaking his head. He moved toward his horse and moved his fingers over the mane. It was wet from the snow.

"The Princess married a man who can control the waters—possibly a sorcerer," Hiensaid. "And he is currently ruling the capital as your sister's husband…" Hakei fisted the mane and closed his eyes, breathing heavily to calm himself. "And our spy warned us to be careful. There are traitors, though he could not give names." Hakei remained silent as the news stopped coming. He was trembling from anger.

"My Lord, we shall follow you to victory," Shigi said, bowing to him. "We can conquer Hokkan with our men. We don't need to wait for Prince Temudan's signal—"

"How many messages arrived today?" he asked.

"Only one, my Lord. But two eagles flew over our camp earlier." Hakei nodded and climbed his horse.

"We shall leave conquering Hokkan for another day," he said softly as he pulled out his sword.

He turned to the towering mountain where his army was camped inconspicuously. His trusted warriors turned as well and they smirked at the sight. Majority of the Kutou soldiers were looming above them, swords in hand. The stench of rotten eggs permeated the air and Hakei resisted the urge to gag. He's smelled it faintly last night but he knew magic. When someone casts a spell, it leaves off a scent. And if his stubborn sister married a sorcerer, this must be the odor of his powers. Hakei knew something was suspicious with the letter.

The wind growled as his men lurched toward him. Hakei knew he would lose this battle but he would fight to the end. Let the snow drink his blood and dine on his flesh. But before that happens, he shall kill as many soldiers as he can—if only to subdue the anger inside his heart.

THE STORM CEASED and the sun was slowly peaking from the clouds. Dawn was breaking, lighting the world that was drenched in last night's rain. Yui looked out into the sea, the fiery hues of the sun reflected on the now calm surface. She rubbed her eyes and stood up. Sleep didn't come and her body trembled from the lack of repose. She silently walked back to the cave and stood by the side of the mouth, listening to the sounds he made.

Nakago did not utter a word last night. He sat at the side of the cave, looking at his hands. A pang made it to Yui's heart. He must have regretted it very much—killing the General. Koyuu-sama was, after all, his father. Yui slowly peeked, only to find Nakago crouched in the same side of the wall, unmoving, deep in thoughts. Tears didn't bead his lonely blue eyes yet Yui knew. A tear slowly rolled down her cheeks. And she sat down at the side, leaning to the wall with a heavy heart.

What should she do? What should she have done? Should she have come between them? He was angry last night, too angry that she stood still, watching them as her heart broke. Rage came out of him and for a moment, Yui saw the man he tried to hide behind the emotionless face. She pitied him. And it was an emotion he loathed. And the worst was, he was controlled. Nakago must have hated that above everything else.

She fingered the silver ring and looked at it intently. How could her father do such a thing? What kind of king was he? Why would he allow the annihilation of a tribe? Why would he… Why would he abuse him?

When did this…? She stopped, eyes widening. She remembered a memory, the earliest she had of a boy with golden hair and lonely blue eyes. She was four years old then. Yes, she was too young she thought it was just one of her dreams.

It was a beautiful spring morning. The sun had yet to rise in the East. She was walking on the hallway of the Imperial Palace, in a familiar room she used to visit as a kid. She was holding on to a bouquet of blue flowers from the garden and had sneaked into her father's chamber. Her mother had recently died and the palace was mourning her death. The Emperor hadn't smiled since so she decided to surprise him by leaving flowers on his bedroom.

"Mother… Mother…" a voice called as she came closer to the doors. "I'm sorry Mother… I didn't mean to… Mother… Is this my punishment…? Mother…"

Yui opened the door and found a little boy on her father's bed, sobbing. He was surprised to see her and he immediately grabbed the sheets to cover his chest, retreating to the far end of the bed. Enthralled by his beauty, she walked toward him and climbed the bed, eyeing him intently.

"Are you a boy or a girl?" she asked, crawling toward him.

"Boy," he squeaked, hiding behind the sheets as she moved closer. "Don't come closer."

"If you're a girl, you'll be a very pretty girl!" she told him, smiling softly. "Don't be afraid. You're hurt," she said matter-of-factly. She reached for his bleeding lips but he pushed her away. The flowers fell from her hands, leaving a small cut on her index finger. She looked at it and frowned.

"I didn't mean to—" the boy said, immediately pulling her hand to lick on the wound. Yui blinked. "I'm sorry."

"What are you doing?"

"My mother said you have to lick the wounds so the pain will go away," he said. Yui frowned more.

"But it still hurts," she said. "My mother told me a better way to make the pain go away!" She moved closer to him and cupped his face. He tried to move away but she held him still. "I'll show you because you were crying and my mother said boys won't cry if they're not hurt," she said.

"I'm not hurt—"

"Yes, you are! Now hold still." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. After that, she rolled her palms over his cheeks, an act that made him flush. "Pain, pain be gone!" she said, raising her hands from his cheeks to the heavens. "Does it still hurt?" She eagerly asked, smiling.

"Yes…" he murmured, looking at her. His response made her frown.

"I must have done something wrong. Oh, I know!" She moved closer and palmed his cheeks. She did the same routine and raised her hands up as a sign of victory. "Pain, pain be gone!" The boy gasped when she leaned closer and planted a chaste kiss on his lips.

"Does it still hurt?" she asked and he couldn't utter a word. "Maybe I have to do it longer," she murmured before doing it again. This time, she lingered longer on kissing him. When she was satisfied, she moved away, seeing his cheeks burning. "Well? Is it still painful?" He shook his head and looked down. "See! I told you my mother is right!" she exclaimed, clapping because of joy. "Why are you in my father's room?" she inquired, sitting beside him on the bed. His eyes widened.

"Father…?" he muttered. "He is your father?" he asked with disbelief.

"Hai!" she answered. She was about to say more when they heard the jingle of bells in the hallway. "Oh no, I have to go… It's General Kei and that's the bell on his sword," she said, pulling the hem of her long dress to cross the large bed and jump at the other side. "I'm scared of him, he has so many pimples on his face!" She was about to rush out when she turned to him. "Will you still be here tomorrow?"

"I… I probably will be…"

"Great! Then I'll see you tomorrow again then! If something hurts, I'll do that chant again!" she said before heading for the door, making him flush and cover himself in the white sheets.

Yui heaved a sigh and leaned on the wall of the cave. The memories returned but her resolves still failed her. What should she tell him? Should she make him remember that day? When she kissed the pain? She shook her head, tears flowing down her already pale cheeks. He hated him for her father's death, yet… Her chest tightened. He was pitiful and merely thinking of the nights he endured her father's advances made her pity him more. How could she talk to him if she was feeling this way?

AMIBOSHI COMMITTED THE biggest mistake when he agreed to leave behind a fellow warrior. The tears came to him as they ran toward the foot of the mountain. He was afraid last night, too afraid that when Tomo punched him, he let the army pull his horse away. He could have stayed and used his flute—his chi was always powerful in long-range combat. But no, instead of fighting, he embraced the mane of the horse, weeping as they descended the mountain. He was deprived of sleep. No man could sleep decently after last night's events.

"He will be alive," Commander Eichuu told him but the younger boy shook his head.

"I don't feel his chi anymore," he said softly, still eyeing the row of trees behind them. "As a warrior, I know the one I have to protect is Yui-sama... But I want to protect my comrades too," he muttered. "And not saving Tomo-sama… Leaving him behind… I am not worthy to be a warrior! If I always fail, I can't protect Kutou!"

Eichuu recognized the sadness in his eyes and smiled bitterly. "Do you know what makes a warrior?" he asked and Amiboshi turned to him, shaking his head. "People think that if you have a sword, if you are part of the Imperial Army, if you wear the dragon armor, you are a warrior. But it's not. These things…" he said, pointing to what he mentioned. "…They are as much blessings as they are a curse. We fight for Kutou when the invaders come to our borders. We watch our brothers die. If we win, we give them a decent funeral… If we lose, we watch as their bodies get tampered by our enemies."

"I don't understand…"

Eichuu smiled, looking ahead. "We protect Kutou because our brothers' blood is one with the land of Kutou. I love my brothers, my fellow soldiers, my friends, and because they died for this country, I love this country." Eichuu tapped his shoulders. "If your fellow warrior indeed died in last night's attack… then you have more reason to protect this country. When you begin to doubt your capabilities or your cause… think of the friends who gave their lives for you… and let their death give you strength."

Amiboshi wiped his tears and nodded. He understood yet guilt still filled him. He thumbed his arm and was surprised to find a throbbing flesh. Suboshi had sent him a message—and because he was too depressed over Tomo's death, he didn't notice it! He read the message and Amiboshi's eyes widened. Eichuu noticed the sudden change in the younger man.

"What's wrong?"

"My brother sent a message… He got separated from Yui-sama because he fell into the river…" he read slowly, heart beating wildly. "And he's currently held captive by the warrior Soi." Amiboshi swallowed hard. "I need to save my brother!"

"We will support you, don't worry." Eichuu called his right-hand man and gave orders to depart. Amiboshi scribbled a few messages on his arm, hoping Suboshi would respond immediately. But nothing came, worrying him more. "The horses are ready to depart for Souun. The General mentioned that he will assist Yui-sama to seek help from Konan so your brother will probably be around the area."

"Yes… I think he will be around Souun."

"Commander! We have urgent news! You would never believe it!" A younger soldier called and they both turned. "The General—General Koyuu is dead!" Eichuu pulled the younger man's armor, his face darkened.

"What? Lead me to him!" The two men hurriedly followed the soldier who ushered them to the swamp. The smell of decaying flesh filled Amiboshi's nostrils. Indeed, a few meters from where they stood, General Koyuu lie, drenched and lifeless.

"We found his body floating in the river when some of the men went fishing! We pulled him out and he is already dead!" The man explained. "We cannot say how long he's been dead. The waters worsened his state."

"Cut down trees and we'll make a burial boat for the General before we leave!" Eichuu ordered and the other men scrambled to do his biddings. He walked toward the older man and bowed, uttering a prayer.

Although his body was bloated from the waters, the General's face was calm, very calm. Amiboshi eyed his armor and noticed gashes on his suit, showing off bluish pale skin. A smooth purple pearl caught Amiboshi's attention and he eyed it, walking slowly toward the kneeling commander. There were two pearls around the General's neck, both glimmering under the bright sunlight. Fear immediately gripped Amiboshi.

The pearls resemble the ones Yui-sama had around her neck. And if the General and the priestess met last night and he was carried by the waters to his death… What happened to Yui-sama?

YUI MUSTERED THE courage to approach him before the middle of the day. By then, her cheeks were dried and her lips no longer tremble. She had composed herself well—the long bath in the river made miracles and improved her confidence. But her eyes were still sore and red.

"Nakago…" she called him, his name rolling off her tongue very softly. He didn't turn and the lack of response urged her to walk and kneel before him.

"These hands killed my father," he told her, still staring at his calloused hands. There were still traces of blood in them, the general's blood. "These same hands killed my mother too," he said, smirking at the thought. Yui swallowed hard, stopping the lump that formed on her throat. "They are tainted by blood, blood that will never be washed away."

Yui shook her head, closing her eyes and then opening them to look at him in the softest way she can. She doesn't want to bring a heavier burden on him. No, she doesn't want that. After what she saw, after what she learned, she wanted to ease the pain in his heart. This man killed her father, yes, but she could not continue hating him after learning the abuse he endured, and in the hands of the man she valued with her life. What was done was done. Right now, she wanted to see him in his glory, not with broken wings. She gently touched his hands and leaned closer to meet his eyes.

"I love these hands… They have always protected me," she whispered. He lifted his hands and kissed them, making them cup her cheek. It was the truth: Nakago's hands have always protected her. And no amount of hate could change that fact. "They… they made love to me… These hands made me a woman."

"I killed your father with these hands," he said, looking up to show her a smirk. "You vowed to kill the man who murdered your father, didn't you?" His eyes caught hers and Yui froze.

"I…"she stammered, not knowing what to tell him. He cupped her face and pulled her closer. She can see the sorrow in his deep blue eyes. Pain that were for her probing.

"Kill me… Kill me now…"he whispered and her eyes widened.

"Ayuru…"

"Yui, kill me."His eyes were stern. He was not joking. It was not a command but a plea. The brokenness in his eyes made her heart ache. And a solitary tear fell from her eye, rolling into his cold fingers.

"I can't," she whispered too softly as another tear fell from her eyes. Nakago's eyes, which were soft and fragile earlier, became dark and stern.

"Then I will force you to put a dagger into my heart," he told her and without another word, he pushed her to the ground. He pulled the ties of her robe, tearing the cloth open and exposing her fragile body for him. He took her hands and placed it beside her head as he leaned down to bite on her shoulders.

"Nakago—stop! Ahhh! Nakago!" His teeth sank deeper on her skin and she tried to push him away with the little strength she had. A hand roamed her body, his nails scratching on her wan skin. Tears beaded Yui's eyes as he touched her, leaving pain. "You're hurting me!"

"Do you want me to fuck you the way he did me?" he growled, looming above her. She whimpered in response, begging him to stop. She made a sound when he harshly pulled her and made her kneel on fours on the rocky ground, pulling the robe completely off her.

"Nakago—please stop!" she screamed but he didn't listen and instead, pushed her, covering her small body in his.

She felt him hardened and she cried as he hastily groped her breast, the other hand sliding between her thighs to separate her legs. Yui clutched on a rock, her nails bleeding as she continuously begged him to stop. The ground gulped her tears and the wind carried her pained voice around the cave.

"Stop… please… Ayuru…"

He stopped.

Slowly, Nakago pulled her to sit up, still embracing her tightly from behind. He leaned at the side of her head, breathing heavy in closed eyes. Yui closed her eyes and relished the familiar feel of his body. And her thoughts returned to the dungeon, that incident after she was whipped by Minako. She remembered these arms, the crane of his neck, the broadness of his shoulders that comforted her that night. She lifted a hand to gently touch his trembling jaw, fingering the soft strands of his golden hair. Nakago closed his eyes and pulled her tighter, remembering the same memory.

"I waited for you…" he whispered in the softest voice he could muster. "Every morning I waited for you…" he repeated, his voice breaking. "Why did you forget me?"

Yui opened her eyes and turned to him. But before she could, he loosened his hold and stood up. Yui turned and touched the cape of his armor, gently pulling him back. He stopped and stood still. Before she could speak, he pulled off his cape and wrapped it around her, not meeting her gaze.

He remembered, Yui thought as she wiped away the tears on her cheeks, feeling guiltier than ever.

A/N: I finally found the emotional will to finish this chappie. Am really sorry for the delay! Please do leave reviews! :D