Hey, short chapter, I know, but it was going to be part of another one an now it's not. If it's too short you can talk to nineteennintytwo about that! (Kidding- I love her don't take it out on her!)

LOVE YOU ALL!

LV
XX

"Belle! Belle!" I know that voice. I know it so well I can tell there's something wrong with it. It's not anything I can really put my finger on, but it is there. It's missing something, but no matter how hard I search my brain for a clue as to what is wrong or something to help me change it I can't find the bit that's missing. It's not just that voice that has something missing from it. The colours aren't right either. They're less vivid and seem to be out of focus, blurred around the edges. Sounds aren't as sharp as they once were and there aren't as many as I know there should be. I can't feel the small things like the wind or someone's breath on the back of my neck. "Belle!" he says again before I turn.

And there he is.

"Jack," I hear my own voice, but I can't tell if I said it or thought it. I concentrate on his face. That's not right either. Again, I can't pinpoint why. All the basic features are there. The eyes are brown, the dreadlocks are there, as are the beads. But are the eyes really that shade of brown? And what is wrong with the sparkle in his eye? It's so lifeless and flat, much less animated. Are all the beads right? Are they the right shape, colour, size. Is there enough? Is there too many? Where is his hat? Why isn't it sitting on top of that bandanna? He walks towards me. I don't feel his breath on my face as he bends to kiss me. I can feel his kiss though. Sort of. But even that's not quite right. It's not really there and neither am I.

He takes my hand and lead me away from the dock where the Pearl is moored and up to the fort. I don't have time to wonder where everyone else is. We reach the top and look out over Port Royale. I knew the journey should have been longer than that. The sun glitters half-heartedly on the sea which is the wrong shade of blue. He turns to me, "Do you want to leave here?"

"Yes."

"Be like me," he says. "Become a Sparrow."

I hear female laughter. I look around for where it came from. "How?" I ask him.

Another peel of laughter and Scarlette appears by his shoulder. She puts and arm around him and leans into his shoulder as he turns me round to face him. My back is now to the sea, but I'd rather look at him. Giselle drops herself over his other arm.

"Tell her, Jackie," she coos.

"Before you can be a Sparrow," he hisses, his smile twists and turns cold. "You have to learn to fly." He leans right in close, his lips hovering by my ear and he wispers something. "Do you want to know a secret, Belle?" I nod. "You can't fly… and you will never be a Sparrow."

He pushed me and I fall. I fall. I fall and fall and fall and I can't stop. The words "you'll never be a Sparrow…" ring in my ears and bounce around in my head. I can't feel the wind rushing past me, but I can still hear his voice echoing in my head. I hit the water and I sink down and down and I don't think I'm ever going to stop.

***

The world flickered between my room and the sea, between dreams and reality. Eventually it evaporated completely and I was left with my room. I hated sleeping. When you dream it is incredibly hard to change what you're dreaming about. You can't control the dream even if you want to. That particular dream had brought back the cold, hard reality that I was forgetting him. The things that were missing were things I had forgotten. It was only small things, certain tiny mannerisms and small miss able things like the exact way he walked. Those things in his appearance I would never be able to alter in my memory. I would never be able to see if my memory was right about the shade of his eyes, or exactly how many beads there were in his hair. I would never be able to get it right because I would never see him again. And soon he would slip from my mind completely and I would never be able to tell the difference between the real Jack and the one stuck in my dreams.

Eventually he would become a burr before he disappeared completely.