a/n: hey guys! another yaoilicious installement! XD i want to apologise if there are some bad spelling/grammar mistakes my laptops acting strangely so i have to type up chapters on word pad :S i have proof read but some mistakes still slip through so sorry... oh and that why i dont update every day as well...

boring part over! i'm not the owner of bleach, well unless toilet bleach counts XP

Troublesome Kitty's and Confusion

Ulquiorra had just come back from training, he was covered in dirt and the blood of lesser arrancar. All he wanted was to take a shower. That's all. Just one shower.

His boyfriend had other ideas though.

And they weren't even the kind of ideas he liked.

No.

Grimmjow wanted him to play with his pet kitty. He had found it yesterday and as the 4th had expected had only taken care of him alone for about five hours. Now he was in his room messing up his bed covers that he had straightened just this morning, demanding he play with them.

"Grimmjow I want to take a shower" he said menacingly his voice sat on edge, if there was one thing he absolutely could not take it was people interfering with his showers.

"Awww but if you play with us I'll shower with you" grimmjow pouted up at the other man then raised his eyebrows suggestively.

"No"

Fail.

Grimmjow decided to try a direct tactic. Grinning he got up letting the cat roam around ulqui's bed causing him to twitch in annoyance. He drew closer to his boyfriend who narrowed his eyes suspiciously. He knew what grimmjow was trying but it wasn't going to work. Grimmjow threaded his hands around Ulquiorra's waist and gently nibbled on his ear.

Ulquiorra sighed in annoyance, quite audibly as well but grimmjow ignored this and let his hands travel down to ulquiorra's pants. Using his thumbs he pulled the waistband out and slipped the other hand inside. The green eyes widened as he grabbed the hand out of his pants and pulled away.

"Hey! I was just getting started!" blue eyes flashed indignantly at him, however ulquiorra ignored this and walked towards the shower, there was no way he was going to do that while he was still filthy.

Stepping into the shower he got rid of his clothes and turned the hot water on. He was running his hand through his gorgeous raven hair whn he heard shuffling outside the room, sighing he made sure the door was locked then called out

"You'd better not break the door! i'm warning you grimmjow!" he growled menacingly, he had broken ulquiorra's walls four times so far, why did he hate doors so much?

"Fine! i was just gonna knock anyway you shouldn't assume things 'bout me!" grimmjow was moaning again, honestly he could be so troublesome sometimes, him and that cat...

A lightbulb went off inside ulquiorra's head, his lips curved into a smile.

Grimmjow was staring at his boyfriend as he came out of the shower, taking in the delicious sight of his half naked body, beads of water dripping down his smooth muscled chest agonsingly slowly, he wanted nothing more than to rip his towel off his waist and fuck the ever loving crap out of him! Ulquiorra knew he was staring he just ignored it though, grimmjow liked to scrath, claw and bite while having sex, dude was a sadist, and ulquiorra was in no way a masochist...er...welll maybe a little. But he wasnt in the mood to go get new sheets and explain why they were ripped to shreds and weird smelling. Yeah what he didnt know was that the arrancar replacing the sheets thought ulqui just liked to violently masturbate...(sorry ulqui :P)

He finally found what he had been looking for, a large multicolored ball of yarn. He tossed it out towards grimmjow who caught it with surprising ease seeing as he wasn't expecting it. He tossed it from hand to hand while ulquiorra looked on in curiosity. He tossed it from his left hand to his right, then back, and back again, he kept doing this for a while getting more and more excited. The kitty jumped up repeatedly in an attempt to grab the dangling string that had come off the ball. He managed to grab it and was now rolling around with the string coming undone, grimmjow seeing this smiled even more and joined in. Ulquiorra looked on in utter amusement and horror as grimmjow rolled around the floor giggling like an idiot with the kitty, playing yes playing with a ball of string...

and giggling...

ulquiorra was very very disturbed...

he decided to leave the room.

Smart idea, grimmjow started meowing later.

He was walking towards the training grounds, deciding to look out at the other arrancar and observe their progress when he bumped into spoony, sorry nnoitora,

"Hey there were's your boyfreind princess?" the lanky ass espada teased ulquiorra, who obviously ignored him

"I dont have time for you and your theories nnoitora" he replied coldly and walked off

"Master nnoitora?" tesla, his cute little puppy, er i mean fraccion looked up questioningly, the espada had instructed him to watch closley because he thought that ulquiorra would have confessed...fail.

"Never mind" he said irritably and sulked off to his room, tesla being the loyal cutey pie he is followed and stood in the middle of the room as nnoitora kicked the shit out of his poor couch. When he was done he collapsed on the bed, now he was bored.

Inadvertently nnoitora saw tesla out of the corner of his eye and noted how cute he looked in the moonlight bathing his vast room, then he thought back to the incident weeks ago when tesla had burst through the door red in the face and a total mess.

"What the hell happened to you?" he had asked his dishevelled fraccion

"Master nnoitora i..um...well master grimmjow told me not to tell you but..." he shuffled his feet uncomfortably

"Tell me now! otherwise i'll...erm...do something bad!" yeah nnoitora's not too good with the threats, carrying them out yes, coming up with them..no.

"Well master nnoitora you see i went to master ulquiorra's room like you asked me too to get master grimmjow but i think i interrupted something..." he trailed off again,

"What happened dammit to crap tesla spill!" he was getting kinda pissed he hadn't even hurt anyone today!

"Well thier face were inches from each other...master grimmjow had master ulquiorra held up against the wall, erm master ulquiorra was er...half-naked..." he stopped embarassed, his face was pinker than szayels hair.

"hahaha no way! i always knew ulquiorra liked it up the ass!" nnoitora was sprawled on the floor laughing his ass off while tesla looked on in utter confusion. I mean he knew he had interuppted something intimate, but he didnt really get it.

"Erm master nnoitora?" he timidly called out to the laughing espada, who stopped and stood up, looming over tesla he asked

"What?" tesla was incredibly embarassed, not only did he not know what was going on but his beloved master nnoitora was standing so close to him that his heart pounded faster and that weird feeling he seemed to have around his master came back. Nnoitora isnt one for patience, or kindness but tesla was good enough to put up with him so he sometimes threw him a bone.

"Tesla what's wrong?" he asked surprisingly softly for nnoitora, and placed a hand on his fraccions shoulder.

"Master nnoitora...i dont understand" tesla said it so innocently and with such a cute expression it almost made the espada want to pick him and hug him...almost...he quickly shook the thought out of his head and asked his cute little fraccion

"You dont understand what?"

"The things you were saying and what masters grimmjow and uquiorra where doing" he looked up oh so cutely at nnoitora whose eyes..er no...eye widened, tesla didnt know about being gay? or did he just completely not understand the concept of kissing, love and sex? kinda surprising seeing as loly and menoly where huge yaoi fangirls...

"See tesla when 2 guys er like each other more than usual they erm..." nnoitora scratched his head unsure how to do this "erm see when they really, really like each other they do things like kiss and have sex ya know?"

"Like each other more than usual master?"

"Yah you know when the like find themselves flustered around 'em and their heart beats faster, oh like when your in the middle of a fight and totally pumped yeah like that! or when your ready to do anything for that person thats what i mean by like each other more than usual" he beamed at his fraccion but poor tesla still looked confused,

"What is kissing master?" nnoitora's mouth dropped to the floor, hey its big enough, as he realised what his fraccion had just said, wait that meant he was a virgin as well!

"Master?" nnoitora was still gaping at his fraccion, he then snapped out of it

"Erm kissing is...er...fun? i guess..." he struggled with the concept, as i'm sure you've guessed by now, nnoitora? not so good at explanations.

"Could you show me? or teach me master? i mean if you dont want to i understand i just..." nnoitora couldnt help but let out a little awww in his mind. tesla just looked so cute and without thinking his brain formed a plan

"I'll show you and teach you" his smile grew wide "just stand still" tesla obliged and nnoitora bent over him and placed a hand behind tesla's waist pulling him close into his chest, with the other hand he pulled his fraccions face up to his own. Tesla looked a little bewildered to him but unknownst to him tesla's heart was beating faster against his chest than grimmjows fists had been against ichigo's face.

Nnoitora closed the gap between them and placed a chaste kiss on tesla's lips. Telsa's brain pretty much exploded. Nnoitora actually didnt mind the kiss so much, tesla had soft lips, it wasnt all that bad in fact it was kinda nice. The tall espada pulled him closer as tesla clung on to his master desperatley, nnoitora's serpentine tongue licked across tesla's lips asking for entry and his fraccion willingly complied opening his mouth to let his master in.

nnoitora ran his tongue around every corner of his fraccions delicious mouth, enjoying the kiss fully as he thought about how sweet the blonde tasted.

finally he pulled away, much to tesla's dissapointment, and smirked at him.

"Understand now?" tesla nodded his head innocently, kind of red in the face.

"Master nnoitora?" the blonde fraccion snapped his master out of his memory and back to the present. Tesla was standing over him looking concerned, the espada had been unusually quiet and the blonde was worried. Nnoitora felt the urge to suddenly pull him down and ravage him. But he didnt...

He had told telsa not to tell anyone what had happened between them and that the only reason he had done it was because he didnt want his fraccion to be out of the loop, obviously that was a lie but tesla beleived him cos he believes anything nnoitora says, i'm serious if nnoitora had told him that he shot rainbows out of his ass he would have believed him still.

Anyways tesla, now enlightened, had figured out that the weird feeling he got was because he was in love with his master, but the espada wanted nothing to do with him in that way so he had resigned himself to being as close to him as he could and to do anything he required. He would endure whatever his master did to him because he loved him. It hurt, he wanted to be closer, he hated being so close to his master but unable to reach out and stroke his raven hair, to caress his beloved master and have him hold him close.

Nnoitora was just plain in denial. Poor tesla was being put through turmoil, but nnoitora had no idea what was going on, so he was just ignoring it.

Poor tesla, dumb nnoitora...will these two ever get it on? yes, yes they will...

what'd you think? hope it was fun for you guys! reviews pwease! (i might even churn out 2 chapters next time if i get more reviews hehe)

nnoi: what the hell? you called me spoony AND dumb!

me: yah whatchu gonna do 'bout it?

nnoi: i'll lick your brains out!

me: *gasp* you stole that threat from me!

nnoi:...er...

me:i WILL get you raped nnoi!

tesla: noooooo please dont! ;_;

me: awwwwww tesla! your so cute XD fine i wont

nnoi: phew

*i glomp tesla*

for more random a/n shots please click the button below and review!