A/N: First of all i want to thank all my lovely readers, the amazing people who have waited for my idiotic ass and my awesome reviewers. I love you guys, thanks for sticking with me and my crack.

This is the end. The last chapter. I have had immense fun writing this. I may occasionally do one-shots based off this but for now it's farewell.

The plan

The cat was at it again.

Ulquiorra was beginning to actually feel hatred for the creature. Even though they had agreed upon a rota for the animal, it always seemed to end up with Grimmjow. And that always ended up driving ulquiorra insane. They wrecked his room, ruined his clothes and ripped up his bed sheets. And that wasn't even because of the 'activities' he did with Grimmjow but more often it was a result of Grimmjow 'playing' with the cat.

"How many times do you intend to destroy my room?" ulquiorra narrowed his eyes

"We were just playing" Grimmjow pouted at his boyfriend

"What you call 'playing' I call 'destroying my room and wrecking my possessions' idiot" he replied coldly

"That's kinda long ain't it?" Grimmjow grinned at him, and then jumped out of the way of an oncoming cero.

"I'm giving that 'thing' away before it causes me anymore trouble!" ulquiorra picked up the cat and used sonido to clear the room before Grimmjow could try to stop him.

Grimmjow, shocked and pissed at what was going on, took a minute to realise where ulquiorra had gone and then set upon chasing him.

"Ulquiorra get back here! My kitty!" he shouted after the fourth espada who paid no heed to him. He had no idea where he was going or where he was going to deposit the 'creature'. He briefly thought about giving it to nnoitora's fraccion but then remembered he would probably have to go the tall espada's quarters and he had a pretty good idea what happened there. Shaking the thought from his mind he thought about gin.

But he didn't like gin. So that was out.

Szayel. But Szayel was creepy. So that was out too.

What to do? Suddenly a vicious idea struck him. It was harsh but he was the fourth espada in lord Aizen's unstoppable army. He had to be harsh.

Changing direction he went off into the wide hall. It was where all the arrancar below espada level gathered. There was rarely an espada there unless they were looking for a fraccion or in Nnoitora's case a target.

"Kyaaa! Look it's the fourth!" some of the female arrancar spotted him first, coolly striding into the middle of the hall with a little ball of fur tucked under his arm.

"Ulquiorra!" Grimmjow shouted at him, skidding to a halt. He completely ignored the arrancar surrounding them, who were very curious as to why there were two high ranking espada there, not to mention why Grimmjow and ulquiorra weren't trading insults and let's not forget the bizarre fact that ulquiorra was holding a cat...

"I promise I won't make a mess give him back!" Grimmjow whined at ulquiorra, arms outstretched for his pet.

"No I will release it here and it can live with the rest of the trash." Well they had seen that one coming, but why were they being so nice to each other? It was unnerving.

"It isn't trash!"

"Yes it is..."

"Nu-uh"

"Grimmjow..."

"What?"

"We're not doing that"

"What the hell you talking about? You started it..." he pouted, arms folded. The arrancar thought maybe their brains were melting, or Szayel had slipped something in their food, or maybe Aizen was making them all hallucinate? There was something wrong with this picture.

"You can barley take care of yourself, how do expect to take care of this" he motioned to the cat.

"But I don't have to take care of myself, you do that for me" he winked at ulquiorra who rolled his eyes. Honestly that boyfriend of his, flirting whenever he could.

"You're an idiot."

"An idiot that takes care of you" grimmjow's bravado increased as he grinned like a dummy.

"You do not take care of me." Ulquiorra sounded incredulous, he took care of himself perfectly well, what was he talking about?

"Oh really?" Grimmjow went closer "but you see I kinda do" he reached ulquiorra "or are you just being shy?" he practically purred at the fourth causing him to turn his head away from the other man. However this gave Grimmjow the opportunity to whisper something seductive into his ear.

Spluttering, to the utter astonishment of the arrancar, ulquiorra backed away dropping the cat which landed lithely on its paws.

"You insufferable..." ulquiorra started his insult but was quickly cut off as Grimmjow shut him up, by planting one on him.

In front of everyone.

He stuck his damn tongue on for good measure too.

Ulquiorra was going to murder him.

After the kiss.

But his will to murder the blue haired espada waned significantly by the end of the kiss, because no matter how much he pissed him off, damn was he a good kisser!

"How 'bout we take this back to yours? Unless you want an audience that is" Grimmjow wiggled his eyebrows at ulquiorra. The cat came up and cuddled against ulquiorra's leg and the pale man had to admit it was quite adorable. It reminded him somewhat of Grimmjow.

Ulquiorra facepalmed.

"Eh...ulquiorra?" Grimmjow looked slightly concerned considering no-one could touch ulquiorra in a fight but he had just slapped himself in the face.

"Of course" the fourth shook his head mumbling

"Eh? What is it?" Grimmjow scratched his head.

"The cat..."ulquiorra pointed at it "it's exactly like you, that's why I didn't like it at first."

"Huh?" Grimmjow wasn't sure if that was an insult or a compliment.

"Now I see, I just have to train it...I mean him." Ulquiorra picked up the cat and tugged grimmjow's sleeve. "Are you not coming?" he said, his voice low and husky, sending a shiver up grimmjow's spine.

"Hell yeah" he grinned and turned to follow,

"WAIT!" everyone, including the two espada turned to face a red headed arrancar female who was ogling them. "Are you guys doing each other?" she looked from one to the other.

"Yeah"

"Yes"

They answered simultaneously. The rest of the arrancar were astounded, shocked, stunned and some of them utterly pleased. Hey, just because they were soulless monsters that fed on innocent souls it didn't mean they didn't appreciate sexy guys making out with each other.

"Wait!" she shouted at them again. Ulquiorra sighed and rubbed his eyes, irritated, Grimmjow stared at her and spat

"What is it? Let us leave already for aizen's sake..."

"Who's seme?" she tilted her head

"Huh?" Grimmjow looked at her processing the question "what does 'seme' mean?" he asked her, genuinely interested. Shaking her head exasperatedly she explained

"You know, who tops? Seme is the one that tops, uke is the one that bottoms, duh" she stared at them "so?" she demanded.

Sighing loudly, ulquiorra turned around and addressed the masses.

"We are in a relationship, and yes it is 'that' type of relationship, it is none of your business how it came to be or how it is progressing. He is the 'seme' as you put it and I am 'uke' because that is what we agreed upon. Any further discussion of this in my presence and I shall obliterate you and feed your dust to the others. Understood?" he glared at them all, daring them to say something. They nodded their heads vigorously avoiding his gaze. He grabbed grimmjow's hand and dragged him out of the room.

"They're gonna do it" the red headed arrancar clasped her hands together, drool leaving her mouth. "So freaking hot!"

Needless to say this information spread faster than the arrancar's sonido. By the end of the day everyone in Hueco Mundo knew about Grimmjow and ulquiorra. The reactions ranged from 'aha! I knew it!' to 'wtf?' to 'sooo hot!' and occasionally fainting or anger. Hey the guys were pretty hot and a lot of people had had their eye on ulquiorra in particular. But by the end of the day both espada concerned didn't care at all...mostly because they were getting laid...

In the heat of their 'activities' neither one noticed the cat wander off from its place in the bathroom. (Ulquiorra may have accepted the pet, but that didn't mean he wanted it to watch them! He was not an animal.)

The cat had wandered into a throne room and jumped up onto aizen's lap. The man with a huge god complex (get your minds out of the gutter) simply stroked the cat and smiled that 'I just owned your ass bitch' smile.

"Now they won't try and kill each other because they will be too preoccupied and their strengthened bond will make them more eager to serve me, because I am the one who brought them all together. And then my army will be victorious!" he continued to stroke the cat he had so magnificently used to execute his perfect plan.

He was so damn brilliant.

"Just as planned fluffles."

haha oh dear god, what's wrong with me? i just had to end it like that, i'm sorry.

Well please drop me a review or something, lemme know how much i let you guys down :(

Sayonara and bye bye till next time!

*hands out cookies*