Frostbite
Chapter 11
….
Barry's POV
I woke to the smell of smoke, my ribs throbbing as I slowly pushed myself up. I was surrounded by fire and thick black acrid smoke. The gunman was on the floor a few metres away from me, still and not breathing, debris crushing him. What happened? The last thing I remember was the man pointing a gun at Caitlin and-
Caitlin.
Where was Caitlin?
"Caitlin?' I screamed, immediately pushing through the rubble, looking for the familiar auburn hair "Caitlin, where are you?!"
I could hear Wally yelling out and the sounds of emergency services from outside and continued to look "Caitlin answer me!"
I caught a glimpse of a pale hand lying underneath part of the roof and flashed over, lifting the debris off despite the pain it caused my ribs.
Blood. Blood everywhere.
And one very still body.
"Caitlin! Oh god!" I crashed to the floor beside her, she was unconscious but breathing, a small pool of blood underneath her head. She was covered in cuts and burns and her leg was bent at an unnatural angle, twisted and out of place. I almost retched on the floor next to me when I caught sight of her stomach, a pole was sticking out of her abdomen.
"Oh god, oh god. No, no no no no" I muttered as my shaking hands moved around her wound, I tried to communicate through the comms but the explosion must have screwed with them as all I heard was static. I quickly ripped off part of the sleeve of my suit and laid it next to her, preparing myself. After a few deep breaths, I quickly pulled out the pole, pressing the fabric pieces against the wound which was now gushing blood.
"Cait? Stay with me Caitlin" I murmured as I quickly picked her up, immediately flashing her in the direction of the lab. I laid her on the medical bed as Wells and Cisco run in, already grabbing things.
"S-she…there was a pole, I had to take it out" I stammer as they immediately start working on her.
"Blood pressure's low, pulse is thready" Cisco says as he checks her over
"I need to open her up, I can't stop the bleeding otherwise" Wells explains, already prepping her for surgery.
My heart stops when her does. A high-pitched tone piercing the room. Immediately they start to work on getting her back, pumping oxygen into her lungs as Wells pushes down on her chest.
"Come on Cait, come on" I mutter as they try to restart her heart "Please don't do this, come on"
I flinch when they use the defibrillators, her body surging off the table as they shocked her. It made no change and they went back to doing CPR. Iris tried to pull me out of the room but I shrugged her arm off. I have to be here, I need to be here.
They manage to restart her heart and I let out a sigh of relief, watching as they started to operate.
"Barry, come on. We'll just get in the way" Iris says and I let her drag me out, sitting at my desk in shock. She helps me clean the blood off my suit and hands, waiting for me to talk.
"This is my fault"
She immediately starts shaking her head, disposing of the bloody towel she was using and taking my hand "No, don't do that to yourself Barry. You had no idea what was going to happen"
"I should've gotten her out of there faster, I should have protected her. Now she's in there and it's because of me" I snap, rubbing my face with my hand
She tenses, her hand leaving mine "Barry…. I heard what that man said"
"Then you know just as well as I do that it's my fault"
She ignores me and continues on "He thought you were in love, that's why he aimed the gun at her. An eye for an eye…. Why would he think that?"
"Iris this really isn't the time"
"Not the time for what? What's going on with you?"
"Just drop it okay!" I snap "Caitlin is in there fighting for her life, we're not having this conversation now"
"Just talk to me Barry, please" she says attempting to move closer and I get up
"I need some air, I'll be back soon" I say before flashing out of there as fast as I can and to Caitlin's apartment. I still have my key so I don't have to break in, her blanket is laying on the couch which gives me the impression that she's been sleeping there a lot lately. I go to her room and sit down on the bed, inhaling the familiar scent of vanilla and citrus from Caitlin's perfume.
Usually I would find this oddly calming, comforting even but now the scent just overpowers me and I can feel her blood dried up under my nails. I feel the bile rise up in my throat and flash to the bathroom, retching into the toilet as tears begin to stream down my face. I vomit until nothing but stomach bile comes up and then collapse against the toilet, sobbing into my hands.
…
6 hours pass until my phone rings, Cisco telling me that Caitlin is out of surgery. I flash back to the lab, red bloodshot eyes and pale skin, hands shaking as I see Cisco, Wells and Iris grouped together.
"How is she? Is she…. Is she okay?" I ask, my voice trembling
"She made it through surgery but she's not out of the woods yet. Along with the internal injuries she suffered a major head trauma and a broken leg and ribs. She suffered major blood loss so we should probably do a transfusion, hopefully that will help" Wells explained
"I'll do the transfusion. We're the same blood type" I say, already going to sit down while they fetch the necessary equipment. They take me into her room and sit me beside her bed, she's pale. Ghostly white and there are bandages wrapped around her head, an oxygen tube under her nose, one of her legs is plastered and propped up on pillows and she's connected to various machines and IVs.
I don't even flinch when they insert the needle, blood flowing down a tube into a machine which filters it into Caitlin's body. They can take a little more out because of my healing abilities but eventually they have to take the needle out, bandaging my arm and leaving us alone.
I sigh, taking her hand "I'm so sorry Cait, this is all my fault. I should have stopped him, should have protected you"
Her machines beep, the sound echoing through the silent room as I continue to talk to her "Iris heard what the gunman said, she asked me why he would think I loved you…. It's because I do, God Cait I love you so much and I know that I've hurt you and that I don't deserve another chance but please. Please just wake up so I can spend the rest of my life making it up to you"
I kiss her hand lovingly and sit there waiting for her to wake up.
…
"Why isn't she waking up? It's been almost 24 hours!" I ask as I pace next to her bed.
"She went through a massive trauma, that coupled with the surgery and the blood loss, her body is trying to heal. You've got to give it time Barry" Wells said, trying to calm me down.
"What about her head? You said there was trauma to the head. What if there's brain damage?"
He shakes his head "I just checked her vitals and the MRI showed she has a moderate concussion and some bruising on the brain. No bleeds, no swelling"
"Barry, you need to calm down, she's going to be alright she's just taking her time waking up" Cisco interjects
"how can I calm down! What would you do if the woman you loved was lying in a bed unconscious?"
"What?"
Iris is standing there, a hurt and shocked expression on his face.
I look at her, trying to find the words to explain but I just utter useless sounds "I…I…uh"
"Barry why don't you and Iris go for a walk? We'll call you the second anything happens" Cisco suggest and I awkwardly nod, following Iris as she rushes out of the room.
"Iris! Iris wait!"
"You cheated on me! With Caitlin!" she snaps as she walks out of the lab
"Just let me explain, please Iris"
She whips around, angry tears leaking from her eyes as she glares at me "Okay then. Explain. Explain! How long has this been going on?"
"A few months, it started after her powers surfaced"
"MONTHS! This has been going on for months! How could you do this to me? I thought we meant something! I thought that we were 'destined to be together'" she shouts
"Iris I'm so-" I'm cut off by her palm hitting my cheek, the shock and force of the hit sends me backwards.
"Don't! Do not tell me you're sorry Barry, if you were sorry you would have told me, you wouldn't have declared your love for her in front of everyone! I am humiliated! Just stay the hell away from me" she cries, rushing out.
I stand there for a few minutes, my cheek stinging and feeling incredibly guilty. I never should have let this get so out of control and now I had hurt two of the most important people in my life. I go back inside, ignoring Wells and Cisco's questioning looks and sit by Caitlin again.
I take her hand again "Hey it's me again. Just so you know I'm not leaving you again so I'd really appreciate it if you opened those brown eyes for me. I'll be here waiting"
…..