Frostbite

Chapter 17

(I don't own the Flash)

….

Everyone on the team knew of Wally's relationship with Jesse Wells, she'd gone back to her own world to help defend it with her father and while Wally missed her terribly he turned his focus to his new powers and learning to control them.

So, when she jumped back into their world, breathless and terrified and informed them of her father's hostage situation in Gorilla city they all unanimously agreed to help her. Caitlin had grown rather fond of Jesse, who was the only one who knew about her powers in the early months and spoken out when Caitlin was losing control.

So, she, Barry and Cisco all ventured to Gorilla city to rescue Earth two Harrison Wells. And subsequently ended up getting captured and thrown into cells that somehow dampened Barry's powers, leaving him unable to phase. Unable to escape and an attack planned on their earth Barry had come up with a plan on how to get them out of there. One of them had to 'die'. Or rather pretend to die to fool their captors.

Caitlin had refused at first, terrified she could take it too far and actually kill Barry. He'd threaded his hands through the bars, grasping hers as he talked to her.

"Cait, it's going to be okay. I'm going to be fine alright? You're the strongest person I know, you can do this"

She took a deep breath before nodding, taking off the necklace Cisco had made her to supress her powers and focused, taking Barry by the arm gently as she felt her powers beginning to surface.

The warm, tingling feeling from before was back as Barry's life-force seeped into her own, warming her up inside. It would be so easy to give in, to just let go and stop fighting but she fought, focusing on Barry until she knew she had to stop and released him. He fell to the floor, blue and still and she had to look away, trying to keep the images out of her head.

The plan worked, he was soon tossed out of his cell, giving him a chance to escape. But he still didn't wake. Every minute that passed while he was unconscious felt like a day in Caitlin's head, agony wreaking havoc on her mind. What if she had drained too much? What if she killed him?

She couldn't supress the massive sigh of relief that escaped her when he started to move again, breaking out of his frozen state. He manages a smile when she asks if she 'froze him too much' and shakes his head, stating that he's fine.

They manage to escape, taking Earth 2 Harrison back to his thrilled daughter and then proceeded to de-suit and get ready to go home. Caitlin reached over for her bag, accidently brushing Cisco with her arm as she did. He immediately flinched, pulling himself away. He didn't meet the confused look in her eyes and instead fled, shouting out a quick goodbye.

Caitlin stood there, confused by Cisco's sudden change in behaviour, she knew he wasn't scared of her, he'd told he so many times since finding out about her powers so what had changed? She was determined to find out tomorrow.

…..

She didn't tell Barry, not wanting him to go and confront Cisco like she knew he would. Instead she waited until she had a moment alone with Cisco and walked up to his desk.

"Okay, what's going on?" She asks, standing in front of him as he looked up, his eyes immediately moving elsewhere when he realised it was her standing in front of him.

"W-What? What do you mean?" He mutters, going back to his work

"You know what I mean Cisco, you're avoiding me, not looking me in the eye. You flinched yesterday when I got too close. What's going on?" She asks

"Caitlin, I don't know what you're talking about. I haven't been avoiding you" he says

"Francisco Ramon! Don't lie to me! Is it because you walked in on Barry and I a few weeks ago? Because we apologised for that and it's not going to happen again" she snapped, determined to get to the bottom of this.

He sighs, giving up on his work "It's not because of that"

"Then what?"

"Caitlin, can you please just drop it?" he shouted, getting up from his work desk

"No, I can't. Because one of my best friends is avoiding me and won't tell me why. Just tell me what I did!" she yelled in frustration

"It's not something you did! It's something you're going to do" he finally blurts out

She's silent for a few seconds, trying to understand what he means before speaking again "What do you mean I'm going to do? Cisco?"

"I…I had a vibe, of you…. You were fighting Barry and... and you were Killer Frost" he confesses, finally meeting her eyes, pity and fear clear in his.

The sound of her heart pounding rapidly roars through her ears, blocking out all other sound. Her palms are sweaty, her breathing becoming erratic as she feels panic and terror overtaking her. She rushes from the room, not knowing where's she's going until she reaches the roof. The cold wind whips at her face as she steps outside.

Tears rapidly pour down her cheeks as she starts to hyperventilate, this couldn't be happening. She was gaining more control every day, she was always wearing her inhibitor necklace or cuffs. This wasn't supposed to be happening. But it was, and at some point in the future she was going to hurt Barry, maybe even kill him. She couldn't let that happen, not when there was a way to stop that from happening.

She couldn't run, she reasoned as she stepped up on the ledge. If she ran, he'd come after her and convince her to come back. This was the only way, the only way to protect everybody.

She heard the shift in the wind behind her, heard the sound of Barry flashing behind her "Caitlin! What are you doing? Get down, please baby"

"Please Barry, I have to do this" she spoke, her voice eerily calm.

"No, no you don't. Just look at me Cait, talk to me" he begged, not getting too close for fear of startling her.

She refused to turn and meet his eyes, she knew that if she did she wouldn't be strong enough to do this and she had to be strong enough, she had to protect Barry.

"It was all for nothing, all those sessions. All that time spent trying to control these powers and it didn't even make a difference in the end! I'm still going to turn into a monster!" she yelled out "It's all just so pointless!"

"Cait" Barry says, taking another step closer "Please"

"But if I do this, If I jump I can stop all of this. I can protect you from me, it'll be worth it if it means you're all safe" she says, staring down at the ground below.

"Please Caitlin, we can fix this. We can take some time off, go away for a bit. Please just get down" he begs

"Don't you understand? It doesn't matter what I do, or what I choose, I'm the problem. I can't fix this Barry, nobody can. I can't hurt you Barry, I couldn't live with myself"

"And you think I could keep on living if you died? I'd probably just go straight after you. I love you Caitlin, please just look at me"

Trembling, she slowly turned so her back was to the edge and she was facing him, she could see that he was terrified, tears threatening to fall from his wide eyes. He reaches a hand out to her, silently begging her to take it.

"Cait, we've made it through so much already, we've come too far for it to end like this now. I love you, I promise you we are going to fix this, just please. Take my hand"

She stares up at him for a minute, her lip trembling slightly before she hesitantly places a shaking hand in his. The second her feels her palm he pulls off the ledge and into his arms, holding her closely, hoping that the feeling of her, safe in his arms will calm his speeding heart. She cries into him, mumbling apologies as they hear Cisco and Wells entering the roof.

…

Later, when she's got her cuffs back on and is sleeping in the med bay Barry sits by her, watching as her body rises up and down with each breath. He'd come so close to losing her today, if Cisco had found him five minutes later...he didn't even want to think about what could have happened.

"How's she doing?" he heard Cisco say as he came up from behind.

"Uh, she's out like a light… She was pretty exhausted" Barry says, tearing his eyes away from her to turn and face Cisco "Thank you, for coming to find me"

"Are you kidding? If I hadn't of said anything… none of this would've happened" Cisco sighs, crossing his arms

"This isn't your fault Cisco… if anyone's to blame it's me. I created flashpoint, the only reason she has these powers is because of me"

"She doesn't blame you Barry"

"Well she should! She almost committed sui- she almost killed herself today because of these powers. When I saw her on that ledge my heart stopped, she was so close… I almost lost her" he sighs, rubbing his face.

"You're not going to lose her Barry, we sure as hell wouldn't let that happen. We'll figure this out" Cisco says, clapping him on shoulder.

Barry looked back to Caitlin's sleeping form, he could only pray that Cisco was right.