Frostbite
Chapter 18
(I don't own the flash)
Sorry for the long delay, I've had some health problems recently.
…..
In the weeks that followed Caitlin's almost suicide attempt she shut herself off from everyone, choosing to hide away in the lab, running test after test on herself, hoping to find something, anything to slow her powers down. Barry stayed with her, even if she wouldn't talk to him, going over strategies with Harry while Cisco tried to upgrade his power nullifying technology.
He heard Caitlin swear loudly from the med bay, followed by the sound of something crashing onto the floor. Within a second he was there, thinking she might have collapsed. A piece of equipment was on the floor in pieces, Caitlin pressing her hands against her face in frustration. He cleaned the mess up in a few seconds before checking on Caitlin.
"Cait? You alright?"
"These stupid tests aren't doing anything" she snapped, slamming her hands down on her desk. He goes over, only placing his hand on her shoulder for a second before she flinches away, as if he's burned her.
He's hurt, obviously but he pushes it down, she need him strong right now. Slowly he approaches her again "Don't push me away Cait, I want to help"
"I can't do this right now Barry, I need to concentrate" she says dismissively, turning back to her work, an array of papers thrown out across the table.
"We're all working non-stop to find something Caitlin, you don't have to do this, I don't think I've seen you sleep in days" he said, concerned that in her determination to fix things she was putting her health at stake.
"That's because I haven't, I can't sleep, I don't have time to waste" she says as she files through the papers, bringing one up to her eyes.
"Would you stop pushing me away! I'm trying to help!" he yells, weeks of pent up frustration finally being let out.
"Then leave me alone! If you really want to help me then just leave me alone!" she shouts back, gesturing towards the door
He scoffs, shaking his head "You know what? Fine. I'm going home for the day" he says, storming out of the lab.
She watches as he leaves, repressing a groan when he's out of her sight and banging her head lightly against the table.
…
She stays in the medical bay for the rest of the day, her surly mood souring the air around her. Wally and Harry kept clear of her, Cisco being the only one brave enough to enter. It was obvious to her that Barry had called him, Cisco kept trying to get her to eat, suggesting she took a nap. If anything, that only fuelled her bad mood.
He was back again, this time with a muffin, offering it to her until her glare made him pull it back. He sat opposite to her, picking at the muffin now.
"You keep pushing him away and one day he won't come back" he says, turning his chair towards her.
She clenches her jaw, "Maybe that's for the best" she says through grinded teeth
"Are you kidding?" He shouts, "You really want that? After everything that's happened, everything the two of you have been through, you just want to give it all up?"
"Leave it Cisco, this is none of your business" she snaps, glaring at him
"It is when my best friend is being an idiot" he replies "He loves you Caitlin, he's been here day and night trying to find something to help you."
"Which is why I'm doing this" she says, reaching behind her to pull out a piece of paper, handing it to Cisco "They're my latest test results...it's getting worse"
He read the test results, looking back up at her with sadness and pity in his eyes "Caitlin… We'll find something"
She shakes her head "You don't know that, even Barry can't save me from this… I'm doing this to protect him Cisco, I can't hurt him"
"But you are, maybe not physically but emotionally you are. He thinks you blame him" Cisco confesses
"Of course I don't!"
"Well then tell him, just talk to him Caitlin, please" he pleads
She nods, getting up from her desk properly for the first time all day "I'm gonna go home… thank you Cisco"
He nods, watching as she grabs her bag and leaves the lab. He sighs, sitting back in the chair "I should have been a marriage counsellor"
…
It's quiet when she enters their apartment, she expected Barry to be on the couch, playing video games or half-heartedly watching something on the television. But the couch is empty, the TV screen blank.
"Barry?" she calls out, hoping to hear his voice shout back or see his head pop out of a doorway. But nothing happens.
She goes to their bedroom first, her soft footfalls echoing throughout the house. He's sitting on the bed, head in his hands. She sits down next to him, listening as his breathing becomes heavier. Carefully, she wraps her arms around his torso, pressing her face against his shoulder.
"I'm sorry" she whispers, pressing a kiss to his shoulder
He shakes in her arms, obviously crying. A few tears of her own leak from her eyes, she presses her face against him harder, waiting until she knows he's calmed to pull his hands away from his face, her own replacing them.
"It's not your fault" she says, kissing each of his wet cheeks
"You didn't have these powers before" he states, guilt twisting his insides
"You couldn't have known Barry. I don't blame you… I love you" she says, meeting his eyes
He frowns "Then why?"
Exhaling, she begins to explain "I'm scared"
"Scared of what?"
She pulls away, scoffing "What do you mean, of what? I'm scared to move, I-I'm scared to breathe, I'm scared to touch you! Cisco saw me fighting you Barry, not him, not Wally, you. The person that I care about most in this world. I don't want to lose you but I can't risk hurting you, I won't"
"Hey, hey" he's the one comforting her now, holding her shoulders "It's not going to happen okay, I won't lose you either. I don't care if we have to go all the way to Antarctica to fix this, I'll go"
"Barry-"
"No, I mean it Caitlin. You are the love of my life, I don't want anyone else, I will never want anyone else. Ice powers or not, you're stuck with me til the end because I'm not going to leave you. That's just never going to happen. So you're just going to have to- "
She cuts him off with a searing kiss, her hands gripping his face and pulling him tightly to her. He quickly forgets what he was going to say, hands grabbing her sides and pulling her onto his lap. His tongue slips into her mouth as her hands move from his face, pulling at his shirt, a few buttons tearing off as she pulled it open.
He groans into her mouth when her cold hands run over his chest, making their way down to the belt looped through his jeans. His own hands reach to the hem of her dress, pulling it up and over her head and leaving her almost fully exposed to him. He pulls away from her, his lips now going to the skin of her throat, biting and sucking gently on her pulse point.
She felt like her skin was on fire, the feeling of his hands and lips on her skin too much and not enough all at the same time. Her eyes slid shut just as he undid the clasp of her bra, pulling it away from her and smothering her chest with kisses, eliciting a half gasp, half moan from her.
He drank the sight of her in, all pale skin and flushed cheeks, it still amazed him that he was the one that got to see her like this. And after the last few weeks they'd had he was going to cherish this, make it last. Breathless he kissed his way down her chest and over her stomach, covering every inch of her with his lips before he reached the waistband of her underwear.
He took his time, hooking his fingers under each side and slowly sliding them down, pressing a kiss to the inside of each knee as he did. When he looked back up her eyes were open, wide and darkened with love and want. He smiled, slowly making his way back up her body until he reached his destination.
He took his time teasing her, first with his fingers and then with his mouth, curling and sucking and circling just the right spot until her back arched off the bed, her fingers clenching the sheets as colours exploded in front of her eyes and she cried out his name.
He gave her time to recover before she tugged him up to her lips, no matter how many times they did this she never seemed to be able to get close enough to him. Reaching in between them she quickly undid his bed and jeans, pushing them down his hips before raking her nails up his back while he kicked them off. The boxers came off soon after, leaving no barrier between them.
Threading his fingers through hers he placed them at either side of her head and captured her lips as his body filled hers. Caitlin went still for a second, her moan swallowed by his kiss. He slowly began to move, setting a slow but steady pace. His mouth went to her shoulder as Caitlin's hips met his thrust for thrust, her moans and whimpers become more and more breathless as time passed.
He let go of her hands, grabbing her thighs and pulling them around his waist, the new angle allowing him to go deeper and causing Caitlin to cry out louder, her hands going to grip his shoulders.
Without warning Barry sat up, Caitlin still joined with him in his lap and captured her mouth, thrusting up hard. Their breathing became more erratic, his thrusts becoming lest controlled and more frantic as she arched her back, his mouth instantly planting onto her neck. He could tell she was close and moved faster, angling deeper until he heard her cry out his name for the second time tonight, muffled into his shoulder as she bit down, triggering his own release, groaning her name.
He planted breathless kisses along her collarbone before falling down on the bed, pulling her down with him, a pile of sweaty, satisfied limbs. She laid her head on him, tracing circles on his chest until her breathing evened out and she could feel his pulse go back to normal. She fell asleep to the sound of his heart beating through her ears.
/
He woke up before her, a rare feat. The first rays of sunlight are shining through the blinds, making the room almost glow. Or maybe it was the woman in bed with him. Looking down at Caitlin, who was sprawled across his chest, he smiled.
Definitely her.
He waited for her to wake, rubbing her back gently until her brown eyes peeked open at him.
"You're staring" she mumbled, yawning against him.
"I'm just looking at the woman I love" he replied
"Something's going on in that mind of yours, you have that look on your face" she said as she propped her head up on his chest.
"I'm just thinking about how good it is waking up next to you every morning" he confesses, sending her into a deep blush "And how I want to wake up like this every day for the rest of my life"
She tenses up, her head snapping up at him and looking at him with wide eyes "w-what?"
Gently moving her off his chest he leans over to his desk and pulls open a drawer, pulling something out. She sits up, wrapping the sheet around her torso as he opens his palm to her. A glittering ring lays in the middle of his palm, the tiny rays of light coming in through the blinds reflecting off the single round stone in the middle of the gold band.
"Barry… w-what are you doing?" she stammers, her heart suddenly racing in her chest like a race horse ploughing down the tracks.
He chuckles, sitting up so he can cup her face with one hand "Well I thought it was obvious…Cait, I love you, you're it for me. You're my home, my anchor in this crazy world. And I want to spend the rest of my life making you as happy as you've made me"
"You already do" she cries, tears filling her eyes as a smile breaks across her face
"Marry me, make me the happiest person on this earth, marry me Cait" he says, brushing her cheek with his thumb softly.
She sobs, tearfully nodding and smiling "Yes! Yes of course!"
A radiant smile breaks across Barry's face, with a watery laugh he slides the ring onto her left hand before bringing her in for a swift kiss. They fall back onto the bed, celebrating their engagement as the light of new day fills the room.