Author: Ashley

Title: Losing Your Inhibitions

Rating: M - Mature

Part: 16/16

Pairing: Mon-El and Kara Danvers (Zor-El)

Word Count (Chapter): 3,697

Summary: "What the hell part of him thought that infecting her with Red Kryptonite was a good idea? But then he knew exactly what part of him. The entirety of him. That's who he was. That's who he had always been. That selfish boy from Daxam who got what he wanted, who he wanted, when he wanted. That's how he'd grown up, that's how he'd lived. Why did he think coming to Earth would change any of that? Why did he think he could be a better person than that?" - Mon-El comes across an object that effects him in the same way that Red Kryptonite effects Kara. What kind of trouble can he get himself (and Kara) into?

Disclaimer: I don't own Supergirl, DC Comics or anything related to such things. The ideas, dialogue and plot points were inspired by the show, but they are my own. Plagiarism isn't nice. Please don't steal my ideas.

A/N: LAST CHAPTER YOU GUYS!

Enjoy the conclusion to Losing Your Inhibitions!

Chapter Sixteen: "Found You."

Thursday

Mon-El's eyes fluttered open and he blinked against the bright yellow sun lamp continuing to shine in his eyes. He turned his head slightly to look over at Kara. She lay on her side, facing him, eyes closed as she slept. He lifted his arm slowly, his eyes flicking down to his watch. 12:48am. He dropped his arm. He still felt pretty out of it; his head all fuzzy and groggy, his throat scratchy, his limbs weak. He looked over at Kara again.

Some colour had come back to her face since he'd last laid eyes on her and she looked to be sleeping peacefully. His mind again flashed back to everything that had happened the past week; each day flipping through his mind like a slideshow of videos and images. The things he'd said to Kara, the things he'd done to her, what he'd made her do and that stupid rock. He shook his head against the pillow. What the hell part of him thought that infecting her with Red Kryptonite was a good idea?

But then he knew exactly what part of him. The entirety of him. That's who he was. That's who he had always been. That selfish boy from Daxam who got what he wanted, who he wanted, when he wanted. That's how he'd grown up, that's how he'd lived. Why did he think coming to Earth would change any of that? Why did he think he could be a better person than that?

Kara.

Kara made him believe that he could be a better person.

But clearly they were both wrong.

If he would go out of his way to find Red Kryptonite, infect her with it and then drag it around in his pocket all day to make sure that he could control her how he wanted to? That was not being a better person. He hadn't changed. He wasn't different. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't escape from the person he used to be; the person he still was, way deep down inside of him, even though he'd tried to ignore it; tried to suppress it.

He heard Kara sigh lightly, her body shifting on her mattress as she pulled at the covers that rested on her body, tugging them closer to her chin. He sat up slowly, pausing for a moment to get his bearings and fight his light-headedness. He quietly moved out of bed, remembering how Kara's machines had gone off when she'd pulled the wires from her body. He looked for the power switch on the machines near his bed, turning them off before disconnecting himself from them.

He knew that Kara deserved better than him. She deserved someone that wouldn't do what he had done. She deserved someone who would take care of her and treat her right; not use her for his own selfish needs and desires. So he quietly walked out of the med bay, sneaking toward the exit of the DEO without a word.

Kara woke suddenly, her brain having no comprehension as to what would have startled her awake. She blinked a few times as she tried to regain her bearings. Her eyes looked around the dark room; the bright light of the yellow sun lamps around her throwing her off as to what time it really was. She looked down at her watch. 5:22am. She sat up in bed. It was early. Earlier than she normally woke up, so it wasn't her body's natural rhythm telling her to get up and get ready for the day. The room was silent, the DEO halls outside quiet and empty due to the early hour.

She looked over at Mon-El…who wasn't there. Her eyes widened. Where did he go? Her head turned about the room as she looked for him, but he was nowhere to be found. That's when she noticed that the machines around his bed were off. Not just quiet, not silenced, but off; the screens dark, the lines and numbers no longer visible. She needed to go find him; to make sure he was okay. She was about to pull the wires from her body again before she thought better of it, turning off her machines too before removing them from her skin.

She got out of bed and stepped into the hall. She wandered around the DEO for a bit, smiling at any of the agents who asked her why she was up and about, only telling them that she needed to walk for a bit; she was getting too restless lying in bed for so long. When she'd wandered around the majority of the facility and didn't see Mon-El anywhere, she started to get worried. Maybe he wasn't healed? Maybe he ran away? But then the thought occurred to her. Maybe he'd gone home? Maybe he hated being in bed, locked up in the DEO as much as she did and he just wanted to go home. Why he didn't wake her before doing it, she didn't know.

She decided if he snuck out, she could sneak out, too. At least if she went to their apartment and found him there, she could convince him to come back and rest under the sun lamps for a little while longer. At least then she wouldn't worry about where he could have run off to. She took a look around, flexing her fingers as she felt her strength running through her limbs. She noted the locations of the few agents that were around before darting out quickly; her powers having returned and her super speed getting her out of there before anyone noticed.

She arrived back at her building, slowing to normal speed before entering and taking the elevator up to her floor. When she got to her apartment door, her eyes widened at the frayed doorframe she'd already forgotten about breaking. She blushed lightly as she remembered the way she and Mon-El crashed through the door, barely able to make it inside before tearing each other's clothes off. She pushed the door open and stepped inside, closing it behind her as she looked around the dark apartment.

"Mon-El?" she called out into the darkness as her eyebrows furrowed.

That's when she noticed that his pair of shoes that sat by the door were gone. He had two pairs. The ones he'd obviously been wearing when Alex, Winn and the agents had brought them into the DEO, but he had another pair that was usually sitting there in the apartment. She looked to the hooks that held their jackets. Two of his jackets were gone; neither of them being the one he was wearing today. Her heart started to pound in her chest. Where was his stuff? She moved into her bedroom and noted that his clothes were gone. He'd had a duffel bag that he'd kept in the corner of her room and it was clearly missing. An eyebrow rose on her forehead. Her pillowcase was gone. Her pillowcase? Where would that have gone? That's when she noticed the folded piece of paper sitting on her bed; the bed that still sat on an angle with its broken leg a few feet away.

She moved to grab the piece of paper, opening it up, a twenty dollar bill falling down to the bedcovers before she looked back up, her eyes following the hurried writing.

Kara,

I don't have enough words to apologize for the things I've said to you and the things I've done. You deserve better than that. You deserve better than me. I know you may never forgive me for what I've done to you and I know that there's no way we can be together after what I've done. But please know that I'm truly so sorry for everything.

Here is also some money to fix the bed and the door. I'm sorry for breaking them.

Mon-El

Tears had sprung to her eyes as soon as she'd read the first sentence, but she couldn't help but laugh out loud. Twenty dollars? How was that going to fix their broken bed or their doorframe?

She dropped the note as she sniffled. Where would he go? He didn't know many places and he didn't really have any friends who wouldn't make him go straight back to the DEO upon seeing him.

The bar.

He probably went to the bar. It likely wasn't open yet, it being barely 5:30am, and most people there wouldn't have known about what had happened to him yet. She wiped at her eyes before turning to leave the apartment in search of him.

Kara arrived at the back door of the alien bar, her hand trying the knob, the door opening with ease. Strange that it wasn't locked while the bar wasn't open yet. Unless Mon-El was inside and didn't think to lock the door behind him…

She walked in quietly, wanting to make sure not to startle anybody in case it wasn't him inside. She stood in the middle of the bar before focusing her super hearing. She heard shuffling and movement and it sounded like it was coming from a room toward the back of the building. She looked around the bar again and didn't see signs of any workers so she moved past the bar counter and toward the back storage room.

She stood at the closed door and didn't need to focus her super hearing to be sure. She heard sniffling on the other side; quiet, but there, and she knew right away that it was him.

She opened the door without hesitation and stepped inside the room, slamming the door shut behind her.

Mon-El looked up at her from the floor with a surprised look on his face, his back resting against the wall as he sat in between a shelving unit and some piled up boxes. His eyes were red with tears obviously visible in them and he wiped at his face with the arms of his shirt upon seeing her.

"Kara," he said quietly. "What're you doing here?"

"Looking for you," she said. "Found you."

He didn't look up at her, his eyes remaining at the floor. That's when she noticed his duffel bag off to the side of the small room, his jackets piled on top of it. He sat on top of some bar towels that looked like they had been laid out in the form of a makeshift bed parallel to the wall. Her pillowcase sat folded at what looked to be the head of the "bed".

"You took my pillowcase from our bed…" she nodded at it as it sat in a neat pile next to him.

"I'm sorry," he apologized softly, his voice barely audible. "I just needed something of yours and I thought it was something you might not miss. But then I got here and realized I didn't even have a pillow…" She watched as he blushed slightly and picked it up, holding it out to her. "You should just take it back."

She shook her head. "Keep it…because you're coming home with me anyway."

He didn't respond to her, only his arm dropping and returning the pillowcase to his side where it had previously sat.

"Mon-El," she started. "You're not staying here." She looked around the cramped and dusty storage room. "This place is disgusting. You're coming home with me. Where you belong. With me."

He shook his head and she saw his bottom lip trembling. She furrowed her eyebrows at him.

"You're still healing. You only woke up a few hours ago. You should at least be at the DEO recovering…"

He shook his head again. "Kara, you should leave."

"What?" she asked confusedly. "Why would I leave?"

"You shouldn't be here…trying to help me. I don't deserve it."

"Mon-El-"

"Not after what I did to you. I don't deserve your help or your pity or your concern. You should be slapping me in the face and screaming at me for what I did to you…"

"I'm not happy about what you did to me, that's for sure," she said as she moved closer to him slowly. "I'm upset that you went into that storage room and deliberately stole something that you knew would hurt me-"

"I'm sorry-"

"I'm not finished," she cut him off sternly. "I'm not happy about the bad things that you did or that we did; the things you encouraged me to take part in. But I know that you weren't yourself. I know what it's like to be under the influence of Red Kryptonite…and if this Red Lead was anything like Red Kryptonite, I know how hard it is to fight it. I know what it feels like when it takes over your body and your actions and your thoughts. And I know how good it feels to do those bad things while you're under the influence of it." She moved lower, getting down on her knees in front of him. "But I don't love you any less. This whole thing happening…I may be upset over it, but it doesn't change how I feel about you." Her arms moved, her hands landing on his shins in front of her and she watched as his eyes jumped to his legs, watching her hands on his body. "You're not some horrible, evil person, Mon-El. Something bad happened to you; something out of your control. Looking at you now, I can see how sorry you are."

His eyes flicked upward and he looked right at her. "I'm so sorry, Kara. I tried so hard to fight it in the beginning. I know I told you I didn't want to fight it, but I really did try and I just…I don't even know how to put how sorry I am into words to tell you-"

"Shh," she shushed him lightly as she moved closer, crawling along the floor toward him. She moved to straddle his legs, sliding into his lap. He squeezed his eyes shut, his hands forming fists on the floor at his thighs. He felt her press her forehead into his and he tried to pull back from her, his head bumping the wall behind him as he realized he was barely an inch away from it and couldn't escape her touch. "I know you feel bad and I know you're sorry, but you can't run away from me," she whispered. "I'm not going to let you."

"Asking you to forgive me for this," he sighed. "It's too much. This is too much to forgive."

Her hands cupped his face as she backed away slightly, her thumbs sliding across his cheeks. "But, Mon-El, I've already forgiven you."

His eyes fluttered open, watery grey meeting her sparkling blue. "But…"

She shook her head. "But nothing."

"You can't forgive me. I haven't gotten better at this. I haven't changed. I'm not a good person, Kara," he shook his head in her hands. "A good person doesn't do that kind of stuff to someone they love."

"Do you know that what you did was wrong?" she asked him and he nodded profusely. "Are you going to do it again?"

"No, Kara. I'd never-"

"And you're sorry?"

"Of course I'm sorry, Kara. I-"

"Well, that's how forgiveness works, Mon-El," she stated clearly as she smiled at him. "Besides, I make my own decisions, remember?" He nodded again. "I get to choose who I want to forgive. And I forgive you."

She ran her hand across his forehead, pushing some hair off to the side. When he still looked unsure, she started again. "I want you to know that you're more than just my boyfriend. I don't ever want you to think you're just following me around. You're helping people; with me, with the team, and on your own. You're going to be a hero and you're going to save people. Be proud of that and be proud of who you are. Because who you really are, this better man you're turning into…I love him so much and he's going to do such great things."

Her hands moved lower, grabbing at his clenched fists that still lay on the floor. She pulled at his hands, shaking them and loosening his fists before moving them to her waist. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she hugged him to her. He sighed heavily against her shoulder, his arms finally gripping her body and holding her to him.

"I love you," she repeated in a whisper at his ear.

"I love you, too," he said back, his voice muffled against her shoulder. "Just the way you are. I don't want you to be who the Red Kryptonite makes you. I love you exactly as you are…every day, all the time. Caring and kind and thoughtful and strong and powerful and courageous and-"

"Okay," she laughed as she combed her fingers through his hair. "I get it. That's enough adjectives."

He smiled against her shoulder before turning his head, his lips pressing a light kiss to her neck. Her hands moved to his cheeks, pulling his face away from her shoulder. His eyes connected with hers as he tried to blink away the remnants of his tears. She smiled a toothy smile at him before leaning in to kiss his lips. His lips barely prodded at hers; merely a tentative push and she pulled back.

"Mon-El," she scolded and his eyes fluttered open worriedly. "You're not going to scare me away. Kiss me like you mean it," she demanded.

He smiled a crooked smile at her. "I know I was being really aggressive before…"

"Well, I would say that when you weren't being an ass, it was kind of hot," she grinned at him before she moved in to kiss him again, his response stronger this time, his hands gripping at her hips.

"Yeah?" he mumbled against her lips.

She didn't say anything, but he could feel her moving slightly against him in a nod. He pulled away suddenly.

"I didn't mean to break our bed. I'm sorry," he apologized again.

"You can have your twenty bucks back, too...it wouldn't have gotten us very far. I'll just fix it myself. And I'm pretty sure it was my fault that we broke the bed…"

"But I told you that it didn't matter if we broke it and it does matter and-"

"Mon-El!" she interrupted, rolling her eyes as she grabbed a hold of his cheeks. "It's a bed. I don't care. It's not the first piece of furniture I've broken."

His eyes widened as he stared back at her.

"Not with sex!" she shouted awkwardly. "I mean…I just mean that I break things accidentally all the time…just doing things…regular things I mean."

He nodded awkwardly.

"Anyway," she sighed. "I remember the super sex before we broke the bed…and it was pretty good, so…"

His eyes widened. "Yeah, I could do that again," he said and she felt his hips shifting beneath her.

"Not right now!" she laughed.

"Oh, right," he nodded.

"You don't even have your powers back yet, do you?"

He sighed, "Well, no, but…"

"Speaking of, we're going back to the DEO. You should be resting in bed under some of that fake yellow sun." She ran her hands along his face, one hand pushing some of his hair from his forehead again. "How are you feeling?"

He shrugged. "Tired I guess. It took a while for me to pack my stuff and get over here…"

"Well, that's unfortunate," she said as she moved to get out of his lap and stand up. "Because now you're just going to have to drag it all back home again."

She grabbed her pillowcase from the floor and moved to shove it in his duffel bag, grabbing the rest of his stuff in one arm. A small smile broke out on his face as he moved to stand up, wobbling slightly as he got to his feet. She wrapped her other arm around his waist, holding him upright and close to her.

"Hold on," she said to him. "I'll get us back there in a second."

"What did I say about getting a call that you two escaped in the middle of the night?"

Both Kara and Mon-El's eyes widened as they walked back into the med bay, a furious Alex already screaming at them.

"It was me, Alex," Mon-El stated as Kara helped him walk back to his bed and tossed his duffel bag in the corner of the room. "I'm sorry. I just needed to get out of here for a little while."

Alex sighed loudly as she watched Kara make a face at her that told her to drop it. "Fine. At least you two figured out how to turn off the machines, so I only had half a heart attack this time when I got a call instead of a panicking emergency alert." She watched as Mon-El got back into bed and Kara followed suit, both of them cramming their bodies onto the tiny cot. Alex rolled her eyes. "Gah, you guys. Mon-El can likely go home tomorrow. Is this really necessary?" she asked as she started to turn on machines and reattach the sensors to Mon-El's skin.

"Yes," they both answered simultaneously. Alex rolled her eyes again as she flipped the blankets up and over both of them.

"Well, if anyone falls out of bed and onto the floor, I hope it's the one who's gotten her powers back…" she turned to leave. "I'll see you guys later."

Mon-El sighed heavily as he relaxed into the mattress beneath him.

"Get some rest," Kara whispered at his neck, her nose pressing against his skin. He nodded against the pillow, his hand tightening around her body and holding her to him.

"Thank you for forgiving me, Kara," he whispered. Her lips pursed as she kissed his neck.

"You're welcome. I love you."

She watched as a small smile formed on his lips, his face softening as her words relaxed him entirely.

"I love you," he returned.

END.

A/N: Thank you all for sticking through this one with me - I know the updates have been infrequent with this one especially considering it was finished before I even started posting lol. Thank you for all the comments and love and I'm glad you guys enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it. I'm currently working on an AU multi-chap, but this is just SO time consuming since I'm so detail focused, so just expect only one-shots for a while now.

As always, I love chatting on Twitter so find me there (_ashleymaria_) and I'm always open to fic suggestions, etc., just also busy so don't think I've forgotten about your ideas if I haven't written them yet!

Sending love and appreciation to you all!